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Hi, I’ve been thinking about this for a while and I don’t fully understand it, so I wanted to ask people who actually live it.

I don’t have kids, I’ve never had a girlfriend, and I currently live with my parents. In general, I consider myself quite independent. I enjoy being alone and I don’t feel like I need a lot of social life. I also don’t really have close friends right now, although I’m open to having them.

A lot of the time I wonder what life in a relationship or family life is actually like, because from the outside I can’t fully understand it.

For example:

I don’t really understand why people want to live together as a couple in the same space.

Many of the things people usually mention (like talking about your day, doing everyday things together at home, etc.) don’t feel particularly meaningful to me.

I struggle to understand the idea of sharing daily routines with someone else, beyond the romantic or sexual aspect.

I’ve also thought about having children. Sometimes I see young couples with kids and houses full of photos and memories, and it gives me the impression that they are in a more “advanced” or “built” stage of life. But at the same time, I don’t know if that’s something I actually want or just an external impression.

If I think about my future, I imagine a life with financial stability, business, travel, freedom, good health, and enjoying my time. If I have a partner, I imagine it more in a romantic or sexual way, but not necessarily constant cohabitation or a traditional family life.

I’m not saying one lifestyle is better than another, I’m just trying to understand something I haven’t experienced.

My question is: What actually makes being in a relationship or having children valuable for you? What changes when you experience it from the inside that you can’t really see from the outside?

I’d appreciate real experiences, not just theory.