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Is it normal to be reluctant to attempt to make friends because of the effort involved? The forming and upkeep of the relationship, making a good impression, etc.
I'm just wondering if this is another sort of phenomenon like "everyone's just pretending like they know what they're doing" or "everything sucks but people just kind of deal with it" kinda thing.
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Are you trying to make friends or connections? I've decided I'm not going to bother with efforts that feel forced regarding relationships, it's just too fucking exhausting.
It's great and all to try and be genuine but I still struggle with SA. Regardless, I much rather be lonely than be walking on eggshells around those people.
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Most people don't think about these things, they kind of just go out into the world and sometimes friends happen. But it does seem there is less interest in making friends the older people get.
For dating I think it works differently as in everything is way more calculated such as what you described. The idea behind friends is different though because you aren't trying to negotiate an arrangement that is akin to having a job. It's supposed to be fun and you should be accepted for who you are without having to try to be anything more. If you haven't met people like that, you haven't met your friends.