>>34601804
Every woman is different and has a different set of wants/needs. What one girl finds irresistible another may dislike entirely. It's important to be authentic because of that, no point in pretending to be what you aren't and building a relationship on false pretenses.

No two "loves" are the same, even at the same intensity they can feel different and that's ok.

Communication is the undisputed most important thing. You need to be on the same page about expressing love, sexual compatibility, your life together, expectations from one another, etc. it saves a lot of heartache to just put it out there.

Girls tend to like capability and a sense of humor in men; if you're a force of nature who can get shit done and make her laugh during the mundane parts of life you're on a good track.

I've noticed that most women tend to gravitate towards men who are similar to their fathers regardless of if their relationship with them was healthy or not; do with that what you will.

My first few girlfriends were nerdy/artsy types and they were a pain in the ass, lots of learned helpless there that made us incompatible in the long run. My wife was a preppy workaholic when we met, she's one of the most driven and dutiful people I have ever met and that applies to our love life too; I won her over by being the person *she* could rely on and spoiling her whenever I can. We had little in common hobby wise at first, that ended up being a really good thing for us because we spent time sharing our interests with one another and most stuck. The ones that didn't are our personal times and we share an understanding of the importance those hobbies have for one another.

Just because a woman is insecure does not mean she will be loyal and fight for the relationship. I was in several with insecure women (negative body image, bullied in childhood, no friends, rocky at best relationship with parents, zero priority male attention) thinking they'd be "grateful" for the relationship. Not grateful in a worshipful, entitled sort of way, but since they had a boyfriend or really any positive support in their life they would value the relationship more. Yet of the three insecure girlfriends I had two cheated and the other left after letting unspoken problem she had with the relationship turn into resentment.

Not saying they're all like this but just something to watch. On the flipside being with a emotionally secure woman has been much more hassle free. Make sure if you are with a woman with past trauma that she can name it and is actively trying to deal with it.

>>34601908
If you think a woman should be grateful that you are in the relationship with her maybe that's the one of reasons she cheated on you lol

Sounds misogynistic, but I've learned that you probably shouldn't expect them to take responsibility for much.

>>34601804
Some random advice:

1) When dating, it's important not to aim too low. If you don't like yourself very much, it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that the only way a woman will ever want you is if you can help her in some way - which leads you to look for women who seem to *need* help. The sad fact is that most people - men or women - tend not to change very much once they reach adulthood. So your attempts to help or fix a woman won't work. She may well be very grateful, but she won't actually change. And in a few years, the vulnerabilities that initially drew you to her will make her more and more annoying.

2) Attachment styles are real. Read up on them. A combination you need to be particularly wary of is when one person is insecure/anxious and the other is avoidant. Anxious types tend to be strongly drawn to avoidant types, but the end result is extremely unhealthy for them.

3) Almost everything you read about women on 4chan is WRONG. Try and go into it with an open mind.

4) If you want to be attractive to women, the two most important qualities are A: be confident (or at least learn how to appear confident when you're not!) and B: be fun company - if you're actually funny, that's ideal, but at least make spending time with you enjoyable.

(to be continued)

>>34602107
(continued)

5) The worst possible way you can select a woman to be with is on the basis of how physically attractive she is. Having someone you mesh with emotionally and intellectually is far more important when it comes to whether the two of you will be happy in the long run. This doesn't mean sex isn't important - on the contrary, it's very important - but one of the things that you learn with time is that the other person's physical appearance is much less important to good sex than you thought.

6) And talking of sex, sexual compatibility is a real thing, and very important. People who have never had sex will tell you that any two people can be compatible if they are just considerate of each other; this is COMPLETELY WRONG. There's an astonishing amount of variation between people and between bodies. Finding someone who is genuinely compatible with you sexually is a revelation. (Among other things, this means that waiting until you're married is absolutely idiotic).

7) Human pair bonding doesn't work the way that incels think it does.

8) Women are basically human beings, like you, and much more similar to men than you think.

9) If a woman doesn't want kids now, she never will.

>>34601823
>Communication is the undisputed most important thing. You need to be on the same page about expressing love, sexual compatibility, your life together, expectations from one another, etc. it saves a lot of heartache to just put it out there.
Seconded: this is very good advice.

>>34601992
Learn to read

>>34602108
>>34602107
This seems like a bunch of retarded feminist propaganda.
>Sexual compatibility
>Attachment styles
>Open mind
>waiting until you're married is absolutely idiotic
>Incels
>Women are basically human beings
>If a woman doesn't want kids now, she never will
We've been fed this generic word salad for half a century and guess how it has affected dating culture and society in general? Exactly, op, don't listen to this bs. Everything except points 1,4 and 5 is mossad psyop material but that is exactly what makes it so dangerous. Villains like mixing obvious lies with the truth in order to confuse you.

>>34602231
OP was asking for advice from men with relationship experience, not from you.

>>34602243
Joe would beg to differ.

>>34601804
They never stop wanting.
Women are empty inside, and it's your fault.
So you get nagged and complained at constantly to solve her emptiness.
You shouldn't expect any woman to take responsibility for her actions, or the consequences of her actions. Again, it's your fault that this or that happened.
You shouldn't expect rationality. Or to have or make rational discussions or arguments.
You shouldn't expect the truth, in an objective reality sense. The truth to a woman is whatever she feels it is.
You shouldn't expect consistency, and this is a deliberate strategy. By being inconsistent she forces you to ask her. This puts you in the position of the eternal supplicant.

>>34602356
Getting a girlfriend made me a misogynist. There's no way anyone who thinks men and women are mentally equal has ever had to interact with a woman for any extended period of time.

>>34602412
and me on contrary after having a boyfriend I became misandrist

Here's my guide to determining whether she's wife material or whether you should just nut and bail

1. Don't settle for ugly (And I mean actually ugly.) Make sure she has all the things you're looking for. If she doesn't, then you will spend your whole life wishing you had a woman with whatever thing your wife doesn't have.
2. Ask her what her hobbies are. If the things she lists are things that you don't consider hobbies, drop her. If she says things that actually sound like worthwhile pursuits, ask her for proof of a recent project she's working on. You are not her entertainment. You are not her project. Only pursue women that show motivation to do things instead of sit on their phone and watch netflix
3. See if you can find evidence of what her mom looks like and what her family looks like. She might look fine now, but you're seeing her when she's dolled up an in her prime. If she has a reptilian for a mother, get the fuck out
4. Mention other women that you find attractive. Start with well known celebrities, then as the conversation goes on add someone more familiar, and then mention their friend or cousin. If she gets upset or is weirded out that you'd call other women attractive, then she's going to weaponize jealousy later on.
5. Be comfortable with the idea of being where you are now. If at any point things are going south, know that you can pull the rip cord and be safe. If you actually do marry her, have her sign a pre-nup. If she doesn't immediately agree to this, then move to the next one.

These are the rules that I've followed in my life and I've been happily married for 17 years.

>>34601804
Expect the unexpected. Cheesy but true. Women are mentally insane, even the best of them.