I wouldn't have caused the instigating incident that made my dad think i was going to end up on death row, and I could slam my hot gf all summer just at home.

>>154098503
I would have never fallen for a ho that only liked me because she thought I was friends with a pop star in the first place.

>>154099148
She was clearly into him from the start. If he had tried a more normal approach it would have worked.

>>154098503
I would’ve just told Goofy at the start that I promised my crush I would be at the powerline concert. Goofy would understand, it’s not like he wanted his son to be an incel.

>>154098503
Why is she so surprised?

>>154098503
I would have been shot in the back of the head out in the desert.
My dad takes road trips and directions extremely seriously.

>>154098503
There’s this model on insta that looks exactly like Roxanne. She’s like a human Roxanne and she’s hot af.

>>154102012
Link plz

>>154102012
fake post. THIS ANON IS LYING

I would bond with my dad

>>154098503
I'd have just been honest with Goofy.
>Dad. Hear me the fuck out, man.
>Naw, I get it, Maxxy. I've been there.

>>154098503
Goofy would have been 100% cool with it if Max just told him. But he didn't because he was a teenager embarrassed of his dad, which is the whole thesis of the movie

File: 178085893.jpg (280.9 KB)

>>154101253
1) Roxanne being turned on by this tells me that she's a crazy bitch. Nice.
2) Based Stacey being a serious wingmate who's just happy for her bestie.

>>154103422
Seriously, we've all seen the older shorts at one point or another. Goofy has done some whack shit for way lesser stakes.

>>154098503
I would have talked about it.
But, then again, I wouldn't have pulled a stunt like Max did at the... assembly? Whatever the fuck was happening. I don't have Max's daredevil attitude.

>Gawrsh son, if you'd told me there was a girl involved I'd have taken you right there
>Really?
>You think I haven't done anything crazy for a girl, h'yuck!
Cue montage to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxo07LEvH-Q

>>154098503
I would have done the same shit since it all worked out in the end either way

>>154099041
That's why you're a weird loner on 4chan.

Roxanne the perfect jailbait.

File: goofy.jpg (758.5 KB)

>people want to fuck this

>>154098503
No I'm too nice. I would have done this >>154099041 but without the "having a gf" part.

I always liked how Goofy was ready to drop the fishing trip and help Max out, once he finally told him the truth.

>>154107211
Would absolutely still do that chick.

File: IMG_6288.jpg (77.2 KB)

>>154098503
Dad wasn't around much. Left us when I was five essentially. He didn't know how to be a good dad. Sent money when he could to help buy us a house though. Only quality time we ever had together were sporadic card games when he was passing through. The only things of his I keep around are a playing card I keep in my wallet and his personalized lighter he got in Nam.

>>154098503
Someone flip her a quarter and tell her to go downtown and find sewer rat to gnaw that mole off her face.

>>154108179
Shut up Uncle Buck