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The distant echo of disembodied voices rang through the hazy blur of her memories in the midst of another night of restless slumber
“What the heck is that?”
“….like an eggplant! Ahaha!”
“Leave me.. alone!”
“Dumb present… why did auntie give…”
“Piece of junk..”
Kogasa stirred in her sleep, her eyes slowly fluttering open as she grunted slightly and easing up her sore body from the stone bench nested in the middle of the cemetery. It was the middle of the night, the area was deafly quiet aside from the subtle chirping of crickets in the distance. The cold seeped into her skin as she hung her head and hugged herself unconsciously.
“Stupid.. human. Always the same dream, hmph..”
Kogasa shook her head, pouting slightly as she raised her hands and lightly slapped her hands against her cheeks as she let out another exasperated grunt. She quickly stood up from the cold bench and stretched her body out.
“Hnngh…! Nnngaah! I can’t sit here feeling sorry for myself..!”
Kogasa nodded slightly to herself and brought her hand up, balling it into a fist.
“That’s right! I’m the scourge of Gensokyo, the youkai that strikes unadulterated fear into the hearts of men!”
A bright, bubbly smile enveloped her face. Kogasa rested a hand on her hip, extending her other hand out with her fingers in a V-shape as she winked.
“The World-Shaking Karakasa Obake, Kogasa Tatara~!”
Her voice echoed out in the desolate expanse of the Myouren Cemetery as the suffocating silence and awkwardness soon began to settle back in. A crinkled rustling came from below her, following by a deep sigh and raspy voice.
“You quite done yet?”
Her umbrella half rolled over underneath her, propped up by its large tongue as it muttered and grumbled to itself. The large crimson eye squinted slightly, straining from being suddenly and haphazardly awoken.
“Won’t find any humans wandering at this hour. Let’s go back to bed, alright?”
Kogasa’s smile cracked slightly as she let out a soft, nervous chuckle as she scratched her cheek. Her umbrella half rolled back and settled down underneath the bench, grumbling inaudibly. The onset of fatigue and sleep deprivation came rolling back to her in waves as she settled back down onto the bench, gripping the edge tentatively. A faint downcast expression enveloped her face again.
“R-Right.. my bad, so um.. good night.”
Kogasa leaned down onto her side atop the cool stone bench again, shifting and adjusting to find a comfortable position. She curled up more, raising her knees as she hugged them. Her eyes fluttered back closed as rhythmic soft breaths began to fill the air as she gradually dozed off.
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>>51003926
White fluorescent lights blinked on from above, causing Kogasa to mildly grimace from the depths of her slumber as she slowly stirred awake. She raised her hand, gently rubbing her eye as the blur of her surroundings came into view.
"Hweh..? Where.. am I?"
Kogasa braced herself with her elbow, sitting up atop a plain white stretcher as she looked around in bewilderment. It was a simple, unremarkable, and equally plain white room. The only thing of note was a heavy metallic door on the opposite end of the room, making the confined enclosure feel all the more suffocating. A creeping sense of dread and anxiety began to bile up as Kogasa regained lucidity, the full reality of the situation dawning on her. She quickly turned her gaze downwards, glancing around the foot of her bed in a panic with her hands reaching for nothing in particular.
"Umbrella..! Where's my umbrella?!"
Suddenly the blaring cacophony of static filled the room, causing Kogasa to twitch and recoil slightly as she turned her gaze upwards to the source of the noise. Her eyes were transfixed on a nondescript circular intercom in tucked in the far corner of the room. A muffled voice gradually became audible through the static.
"Good morning, Subject 451. How are you feeling?"
Kogasa snapped back immediately, desperation in her gaze as her fingers curled into her chest.
"Who are you?! Where am I?! Where's my umbrella..?!"
There wasn't a reply. The unpleasant discord of static dulled as Kogasa was met with silence from her presumed distant captor. With a frustrated huff, she scrambled up from her bed but flinched slightly as her bare feet made contact with the cold porcelain floor. She glanced down, taking more note of her new attire. It was a basic, light blue hospital gown. A litany of rapid thoughts crossed her mind, her internal dialogue in a temporary frenzy.
"Kidnapping. This is a real kidnapping, right? I was plucked off a random bench from the Myouren Cemetery, carted off to a strange place, and had my clothes swapped out without noticing any of it. But how? But why? I haven't hurt anyone.. I haven't caused any big incidents. I'm just an unimportant, minor, youkai.. just minding my own business. Why would anyone want me..?"
Her thoughts narrowed on that final point.
"Want... me?"
Even if she was kidnapped, someone had paid her mind specifically. They needed her. Brought her here to be used for... something. Kogasa felt a strange sensation wash over her. Someone needed her. Wanted her. Desired her. She felt a traitorous pang in her chest as her face flushed a subtle, soft red. She hung her gaze, letting out a ragged exhale before shaking head and snapping herself out of the twisted train of thought she found herself going down. She turned her eyes back up, standing across from the metallic door locking her away from the rest of the world. A flash of indignation enveloped her face as she raised her hands, aiming directly at the door as she cried out.
"Water Cannon: Ground Water Stream!"
Her arms remained extended out, her palms opened towards the exit door. But the air remained stagnant and an awkward silence befell the room. A cold sweat ran down her cheek as hopelessness frayed at the edges of her sanity. Kogasa slowly lowered her arms, gazing down vacantly at her upturned hands, repeatedly closing and opening them.
"H-Huh..? Why..? My danmaku.."
In a confused haze, she grit her teeth and raised her arms again, continuing to cry out towards the door.
"Umbrella Sign: Parasol Star Symphony!"
But despite her efforts, nothing happened.
"Surprising Rain: Guerrilla Typhoon...!"
And yet, nothing happened.
"Rainbow Sign: Over The Rainbow..."
But nothing happened.
"Large Ring... Umbrella Halo..."
Nothing happened.
She was gasping heavily from a mixture of her physical exertion and a constant stream of building anxiety. A sensation of sheer helplessness washed over Kogasa as she backed away from the inanimate yet imposing door seemingly mocking her. Plopping back down onto the stretcher, she buried her face in her hands and remained stewing in agonizing silence. Her breathing gradually steadied, a pang of despair caused her chest to tighten. She let out a shuddering deep exhale, shrinking back on the bed as she raised up her knees and hugged them close, trying to find some semblance of comfort. Tears pricked the corners of Kogasa's eyes she buried her face into her lap.
"Please... someone... I'm scared.."
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>>51004167
>>51003926
Kogasa always gets abused all the time...
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>>51004167
Time continued to drag on. The only other sound came from overhead, the constant unrelenting faint buzz from the fluorescent lights. It was maddening noise that only seemed chip away at Kogasa's declining psyche. She remained quietly curled up on the stretcher bed, huddled in the corner of the room. Isolated and trapped, her mind was left to wander.
"Did I scare the wrong person..? I don't remember anyone getting particularly angry at me. Was it one of the kids.. did they tell their parents? And they tracked me down all the way from the Human Village.. That's insane...! Completely.. insane..
Kogasa hugged her knees closer, releasing a deep sigh in an attempt to calm her frayed nerves.
"Hijiri-san said the temple was supposed to be sanctuary... a place where I'm always welcome. Someone will notice I'm missing, right..?"
Her train of thought came to a crawling halt as a small sense of serenity cascaded over her. She was a regular at the Myouren Temple, or at least orbiting the vicinity of it. Someone like Kyouko would eventually take notice of her sudden disappearance.. right? Maybe there was already a search party out to rescue her too.
"Notice you? A nobody like you?"
Kogasa felt a cold chill run down her spine. A foreign but seemingly familiar, inhospitable voice echoed from the deepest recesses of her mind. She sluggishly rose her head, her eyes distant and vacant as her vision trained at the swirling crimson mass of smoke billowing in the opposite corner of the room.
"People barely give you the time of day. Even your pathetic attempts of trying to scare humans.. it's not genuine fear you receive. Behind those feigned expressions of surprise, it's nothing but begrudging pity."
Kogasa buried her face back into her lap, her arms tightening around her knees as she let out a choked sob. And yet the smoke continued its tirade, prying open and laying bare all her deepest insecurities.
"You're a complete failure as a youkai, and a palpable burden around every individual you interact with. And yet you have the audacity to vainly hope a surface level acquaintance of yours will note your absence?"
Kogasa shuddered in her fetal position, sniveling against her thigh as she shook her head vehemently. Her fingers clawed and dug into her legs, as if desperately grasping and trying to hold together fragments of her crumbling psyche.
"Stop.. stop it.. please. Go away.."
The red mist pulsated for a moment before sneering at her, disdainfully laughing at her expense with sheer contempt. It hovered slightly towards her, an indistinct obscured figure barely visible through the dense fog.
"You're probably secretly grateful that someone kidnapped you too, huh? Deep down in there somewhere. How desperate for attention can you get, honestly? How sad. Aha~!"
Mounting frustration and ire surged inside Kogasa as she suddenly turned back, gripping a pillow as hot tears streaked down her cheeks. She turned towards the mocking, laughing voice as she tossed the cushion directly at it while crying out.
"Just... be quiet! Shut up...! SHUT UP!"
Kogasa let out heaving, ragged breaths and gasps as the pillow collided with the far wall on the opposite end of the room, plopping down unceremoniously onto the ground. Deafening silence soon gradually returned to the empty room at the abrupt cessation of the taunting voice. Overwhelmed and stressed past her breaking point, Kogasa buried her face into her hands as another wave of tears spilled out. She remained kneeling on the bed, sobbing hysterically with the suffocating isolation providing no ounce of respite.
"A-Ah.. Nnngh.. hic.. Make it stop... no more.."
Aside from her muffled sobs, the only other sound emanated from the constant hum of the white, fluorescent lights from above.
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>>51004604
The pitter-patter of light rain echoed from above, amplified from contact with the tin roof adorning the rundown abode. Ordinarily, it would provide as a comforting and calming backdrop for the household as it grew late into the evening, but it was muddied by the incessant bickering from within the walls.
"Kotaro and the others have been makin' fun of me all week, cuz of that...!"
An agitated young boy pointed back at the nondescript, purple umbrella propped up against the wall near the entrance. His irritated mother stood across from him, her hands on her hips as an unpleasant scowl enveloped her face. She reached out, digging her index finger into the boy's forehead.
"Megumi Obasan works out in the fields every day and barely makes enough to make ends meet! Be grateful she even got you a birthday present, you spoiled brat!
The young boy swatted her hand away in protest, but an immediate flash of indignation blazoned across his mother's face as she surged forward and grabbed a wad of the boy's hair, yanking it roughly and she yelled out.
"I didn't raise you to be like this, Takumi!"
The manic voices and cries gradually grew distant and muted, the world itself seemingly becoming dull and gray. The sound of shrieks, quarreling, and tapping of rain outside soon became replaced by a monotonous and familiar hum. Kogasa twitched slightly, stirring feebly in her sleep. The white, fluorescent lights from overhead continued to drone on and on, serving as a permanent and mocking fixture to her continued confinement. A lone tear pricked the corner of her eye as it dripped down onto the sheets below her. Time continued to march onwards, but without a clock or window to give any indication of the time of day, everything began to blur and meld together.
Kogasa laid lifelessly on her side, curling up more on herself to appear small and insignificant to no one in particular. But perhaps her captor is watching, and seeing her soul getting slowly ground down into dust would elicit some form of pity towards her. And maybe they would even let her go free. It was something unrealistic and absurd to mull over, but it was also a whimsical daydream that brought Kogasa some small measure of comfort. But even that was soon stomped out as fatigue and weakness washed over her delicate frame. She groaned slightly, sighing into her pillow.
"Mnnnngh... I'm hungry.."
Her stomach grumbled and pangs of hunger began to consume her thoughts. An average youkai like her primarily subsists and feeds off of the hearts of man. It just so happens that evoking fear was one of the most efficient methods to extract the spirit of a human. But even some small measure of attention would be a blessing too, as a snack would be better than nothing. As if on cue, the familiar cacophony of static filled the room as an equally familiar muffled voice spoke through the intercom again.
"Good morning, Subject 451. How are you feeling?"
Kogasa didn't have the energy to bark back, and the presence of another person, despite being just a clinical and deadpan voice through an intercom, provided some relief from the sheer monotony of her new caged life. She simply remained lying down, muttering out softly.
"Hungry... and my name is Kogasa.."
She buried her face into the pillow, a flurry of emotions washing over her. She should hate this. She should hate the person who trapped her here most of all. But paradoxically they were the only other presence in her life now. Kogasa desperately wanted to reach out and grasp at the rope they offered, something to pull herself out of this suffocating abyss she found herself trapped in. She wanted to ignore the fact this stranger was the one who pushed her down into this abyss in the first place. She wanted to ignore the fact that it didn't seem like an ordinary rope at all, and something more akin to a noose. She just wanted someone to acknowledge her, express a need for her, to feel like she's not completely worthless.
"I want... I want to be..."
Suddenly her spiraling thoughts came to an immediate grinding halt as the sound of a metal flap being pried open emanated from the door. Kogasa quickly sat up, her full attention captured by the unusual disturbance. A tray of food was discretely pushed through an open slot at the foot of the door, sliding across the ground and into her room. She clambered up shakily off the bed as she stalked towards the offering in a daze. There was a small plate of simple fried rice, positioned next to a hearty bowl of miso ramen, along with a small cup of water, a soup ladle, and chopsticks. Kogasa fell to her knees in front of the tray, like a puppet with their strings cut. Her main food was human fear, but developing an autonomous body provided her the luxury of being able to survive off of traditional food. Her metabolism processed it much less efficiently, however. Tears welled up in her eyes as she reached out, graciously shoveling a spoonful of rice into her mouth.
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>>51006467
Finishing her meal, Kogasa left the tray on the floor as she settled down on the edge of her bed. Her palms splayed out behind her, propping up her body as she leaned back slightly and sighed, gazing listlessly up at the humming lights above. The monotony of her new daily life settling back in, she was left to ruminate about anything and everything all on her lonesome. She squinted, staring directly at the lights as it flickered for a brief moment as her mind wandered.
"That was... I'm being cared for, right..? I'm not being left here to starve and rot away. They're monitoring me for.. something. Am I sick? Is it like that zombie flick that weird caped glasses girl showed me that one time.. the quarantined 'patient zero' breaks out of containment and the whole world goes upside-down.. Oh..! That does sound terrifying~! But.. I don't want to turn into a zombie either."
Kogasa sighed again, falling back onto the bed as her hair spread out like a halo around her head. The lights overhead felt blinding after staring at them for a prolonged amount of time. But compared to the sun.. how blindingly bright was the sun again? Her eyes fluttered closed as she rolled onto her side, mumbling to herself.
"Maybe.. it isn't the worst, being cared for like this..."
She let out a gentle exhale, her face flushing a soft red as a comforting warmth began to burgeon from within her chest. It was a momentary period of reprieve and peace before being suddenly cut short with a condescending jeer.
"Ohh..? Finally being honest with yourself, are you?"
Kogasa's eyes snapped open as she scrambled to sit up. Her gaze turned over to the billowing red smoke seated at the foot of her bed. The vague figure obscured within seemed more discernable compared to last time. She grit her teeth, narrowing her vision as she stared daggers back at the unwelcome entity.
"What do you want,,? Here to taunt me again?"
An undercurrent of frustration and annoyance permeated her voice as the disdainful figure turned to face her. A passing moment of silence hung awkwardly between the two before the fog obfuscating her continued tormentor began to dissipate. There sat across from her on the stretcher was a being nearly identical to Kogasa and yet the complete opposite of her. Her "other" was instead dressed in a light red hospital gown. Kogasa's shoulder-length turquoise hair contrasted with her strikingly scarlet trim. Yet the sole aspect they shared was a lone red eye, but hers occupied the right socket while keeping her left eye closed tight. She raised her hand, waving it downwards as she dismissively shook her head and spoke out in exasperation.
"Oh.. don't be like that, Kogasa. I'm just here to commend you for acknowledging your true desires for once. And to make things less confusing, just call me Tatara.. kay~?"
Kogasa hung her head, gripping at the sheets below her as she muttered in disillusionment.
"What's that supposed to mean..? I thought you hated me.. Tatara."
Tatara's eye widened slightly as she vehemently shook her head again in refusal, reaching a hand out to rest atop hers balled up into a fist.
"I'm just here to rein you in whenever your misguided optimism gets too unrealistic, that make any sense?
Kogasa fell quiet and remained still as an encroaching sense of heavy emptiness settled over her. Misguided optimism..? She knew her cheery, upbeat attitude defined who she normally was. A complete denial of that would leave her with.. nothing. But a part deep within her is claiming that her unrelenting positivity was steeped in a lie. Is she really all that happy, or did she just want to appear that way so people wouldn't start to pity her? To avoid a human feeling sorry for a youkai like her, was it to protect her pride? To maintain her image as a fearsome youkai of the night? Fearsome? Since when? Those were bygone days, and in the back of her mind she acknowledges humans take her much less seriously now. But.. if she let her guard down and showed vulnerability to others, they'd surely shower her with attention and care too. Being selfish like that sounded nice. Kogasa began to mutter out softly.
"Maybe.. I've just been running away.. ever since Takumi abandoned me."
Tears pricked the edges of Kogasa's eyes as she stifled a choked breath and lowered her gaze, unconsciously hugging herself. Tatara leaned closer, resting a hand atop her head as she began to gently pet her.
"I'm just scared of being hurt again.. you know? Really.. scared."
A fresh wave of warm tears streaked down Kogasa's cheeks as a deluge of her innermost emotions began pouring out. Tatara leaned even closer, embracing the fragile delicate girl in her arms while continuing to pet and soothe her. She tilted her head, quietly whispering into her ear.
"It's okay.. Kogasa. You don't have to be a good girl anymore."
Kogasa felt something deep inside of her snap as her sobs intensified. Being selfish should feel wrong, but it feels so liberating too.
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>>51007533
The seemingly endless torrent of tears continued to pour out as Kogasa buried her face into her twin's shoulder. She raised her arms, gripping Tatara's sides as if to tether the last remnants of her sanity to something tangible. To acknowledge reality in this moment, no matter how painfully obvious her isolation was, would shatter her completely. How ridiculous must she look to her kidnapper right now? Sobbing profusely while grasping at thin air, how embarrassing must that be? Openly presenting herself as weak, fragile, and utterly helpless.. antithetical to the core ideal of what a youkai "should" be. But Kogasa couldn't be bothered to care anymore. There was no longer a need to keep up her facade as a "good girl." She can allow herself to feel selfish for once, to reach out and take whatever her heart desired and craved.
"I want.. to be loved."
Tatara embraced the hopelessly adorable yet neglected girl closer in her arms, acutely aware and all too familiar of how starved for affection she really is. She slowly stroked the back of Kogasa's head, her fingers kneading through strands of her unkempt hair. She cooed softly, quietly whispering to her.
"That was the most honest thing you've said in a long time.. I'm proud of you, Kogasa."
Being reassured and comforted like this by... herself? It's a complete detachment from reality and bordering on sheer delusion. Yet it feels so intoxicating and real, like a dream come true. What is this? What... is this? Kogasa felt herself spiraling into a vortex of madness. She has heard of tales of a fairy from Hell that drove humans mad with a simple wave of her torch, but this felt distinctively different. She retained some degree of lucidity. She knew how absurd this must appear to any outsider looking in, yet she couldn't help herself.. being able freely to feast on this banquet of imaginary warmth and appreciation. A soft, warm blush enveloped Kogasa's face as the smallest hint of an authentic smile plastered over her.
"Aha.. ahaha...! Hahahaha...!"
Kogasa was seated alone on her bed, her head hung as she gazed vacantly downwards at the blank, pristine white sheets. Her eyes were empty and devoid of the spark that normally accompanied her countenance. Her arms dangled lifelessly at her sides as her feverish, restless laughter filled the stale, stagnant air of the room.
"I don't... I don't care anymore.. I don't care!"
In a blur of motion, she grabbed ahold of a pillow behind her, raising it higher into the air in a manic frenzy. It immediately came swinging down, colliding with the plush mattress below her as she raised it and swung down again.. over and over. She grunted and cried out, a flare of white hot primal hysteria and turmoil washing over her in waves. Kogasa relentlessly bashed the cushion onto the bed, perhaps illogically surmising she could smash her way through to the floor below regardless of how soft her new makeshift weapon was. With the futility of her efforts dawning on her, she slammed the pillow to her side as it bounced off the wall and plopped down onto the floor yet again.
She shambled up off the bed, her knees quivering and unsteady as she lurched towards the metal door, the sole physical thing confining her, berating her, mocking her, and laughing at her. She unconsciously reached down, grabbing ahold of the edge of the plastic food tray as the utensils and dishes atop it clattered onto the ground. Raising it over her head and standing across from her inanimate nemesis, she cried out.
"Let.. me... OUT!! HAAAGH!"
She swung down hard. The edge of the plastic tray made impact with the rigid, unyielding surface as the recoil made Kogasa instantly stagger back, her heel colliding with the empty ramen bowl as it rolled away and nestled in the corner of the room. She was heaving, gasping heavily as the onset of delirium took hold over her actions and thoughts. A fresh wave of frustration surged inside her as the grip on the tray tightened, raising it at the door again.
"LET ME OUT...! LET ME FUCKING OUT!!!"
The plastic tray bashed and collided against the metallic surface over and over, bending and splintering from the sheer force of Kogasa's repeated assault against her impenetrable, indifferent opponent. She lost count of how many times now, but warm wet tears streaked down her face yet again. Her violent outburst continued, unleashing every ounce of bottled-up rage, grief, and resentment accumulating over the course of her lonely life. But regardless of how radiant her fury was, even the most intense flame can't escape its intrinsic, ephemeral nature.
Kogasa's heaving breaths gradually grew ragged as she felt sheer exhaustion beginning to overwhelm her. The beaten, mangled tray fell from her grip as it rattled and settled onto the floor. The inferno of her anger dimmed and was soon replaced by a cold, familiar despair gripping her heart. She fell to her knees, embracing herself.
"A-Ah.. nngh.. please..."
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>>51008767
Kogasa jolted awake, finding herself curled up atop her bed. She doesn't remember falling unconscious, yet even her most recent memories were only just an amorphous, hazy blur in her mind's eye. But suddenly she was instantly met with a wave of fatigue as she slowly rolled onto her back and gazed blankly up at the white, fluorescent lights emanating an all too familiar relentless, incessant, endless droning hum. They only existed to drive her mad, surely. It was a true inanimate object, along with the metal door, pushing her sanity to the brink. For the self-proclaimed "World-Shaking Karakasa Obake" to be struck with real, maddening fear from lifeless objects that don't even have sentience like her, being outdone by parallels of her past self... it only served to reinforce just how useless of a youkai she really is.
The lights did their job, illuminating the room and allowing her to see. That's what they were built for after all, and they were naturally serving their purpose. It was a simple task, but it was being done efficiently enough. Likewise, the same could be said for the metal door. Despite having just brutally assaulted it, Kogasa had to begrudgingly respect that it properly served its purpose of keeping her trapped in this hell. But her attention was hyper focused on the main sources of her grievances, neglecting to acknowledge the object regularly providing her comfort. It was a slow, dawning realization as she shifted onto her side again, her cheek sinking into her unattended compatriot. Raising her hand, she gently stroked her fingers along the surface of her pillow.
"Sorry.. you've always been here for me. And yet.. I've been..."
Kogasa sighed, burying her face further into her soft, fluffy partner. Silence settled over the room again as a soul-sucking exhaustion remained gripping her body. Her vision was a haze, training her eyes straight ahead before bringing her gaze down at the floor. Mulling over it, didn't she leave her pillow discarded on the ground? And yet she's resting atop of it now. She dropped her eyes down towards the floor at the foot of the door. The tray, plates, and scattered mess she left behind... it was all gone too. The floor was spotless, as if nothing was ever there. After passing out, did her captor sneak in, carry her to bed, and clean up after her mess? Her kidnapper was her sole caretaker, and as the title implies, they have been... caring for her. Kogasa's face flushed a gentle red as she gripped the hem of her pillow underneath her, tugging it down as she embraced the cushion in her arms. She mumbled quietly to herself.
"What the heck... what kind of... is this?"
None of it made any sense. Her freedom was stolen, she doesn't know where her umbrella is, and being confined in an empty room was slow, agonizing torture. And yet being looked after and tended to was nice.. really nice. Kogasa didn't have to act like a good girl anymore, so she could be honest with deepest desires, despite how twisted it may seem to onlookers. She could swallow her pride as a youkai and admit how she truly felt. She loved it. Her blush grew deeper as she tightened her embrace around the pillow. She really loved it.
"Nnnn... Nnnghhaaa...!! Haaahhh~!"
Kogasa let out a gasping squee, smothering her blushing mess of a face into the pillow as she curled up even further on her bed. She felt a fluttering, intoxicating sensation well up from within. Her heart was racing, pounding incessantly in her chest. Her thoughts were in a frenzy as her emotions came gushing out in a single, overwhelming deluge.
"If I was passed out on the floor... he must have lifted me and cradled me in his arms, just like a prince~! Holding me like the most precious girl in the world.. oh my god..! Ahhhh~!! And he even cleaned up my mess too.. even after my stupid tantrum.. that means he's fine with me acting like a bad girl sometimes, right..? Right..?! Spoil me.. spoil me more..!! Wait.. but.. I guess they're not necessarily a prince charming either.. I'd be okay with it if it was girl too.. That voice I keep hearing, was it a man.. or woman? Why haven't I been paying closer attention?! It's that damn static getting in the way..!"
As if her thoughts were being read, the room filled with the familiar, reassuring buzz of static as Kogasa instantly shot up. She sat stiff and upright on the bed, her fingers curled up into fists and pressed firmly onto her lap. She unconsciously tilted her head upwards, gingerly waiting for the voice to speak its daily message through the intercom. Soon, the blaring of static dulled as the familiar voice spoke.
"Good morning, Subject 451. How are you feeling?"
....Huh? What is this..? Kogasa narrowed her eyes, remaining deathly still as she processed what she just heard. It sounded.. like an older male voice, probably. But something about it felt wrong, unsettling even. But why? Was it because it sounded so disconnected or disjointed? It felt.. unnatural. Wrong.
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>>51014295
ok jokes aside
After reading it, I like the concept of Kogasa grappling with wanting to be "wanted/useful" but I don't really vibe with the edgy SCP ahh premise. Just a personal gripe though, I like the writing itself.
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>>51014514
Hey thanks for the input anon! I won't try to hide how copy and pasted the idea was. I guess I wanted an easy enough excuse to write something full-on psychological
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>>51014628
cope, the zoomer will inherit the earth
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>>51011966
She sat in stunned silence, her mind still processing the abnormal voice from the target of her blossoming admiration. But as the moment dragged on, as if the droning static buzz was awaiting her response, Kogasa hurriedly returned to her senses. She abruptly stood up from the stretcher, taking a tentative step closer to the intercom as she was hit with a wave of paralyzing anxiousness. If she allowed this awkward muted stillness to hang any longer, the person on the other side might grow bored and leave her.. and abandon her. Abandon her. Abandon.
"A-Ah.. um. Uh.. I'm feeling.. hungry!"
She hastily nodded her head in a panic.
"Y-Yeah..! Really hungry! May I get something to eat.. please..?"
She gazed intently back at the speaker, the faintest hint of a sparkle decorating her eyes. It was miraculous. Even after enduring so much pain, loneliness, and madness.. Even after bawling out an innumerable amount of tears.. Even after having her heart laid bare and picked apart by the embodiment of her cynicism.. scattered fragments of Kogasa’s shattered optimism began to coalesce, building itself back up. She looked so needy, so adorably desperate, akin to the wayward lost children she came across. She had escorted them home countless times in the past, but now she was the one in need of guidance.
“Anything is fine… really! I’m sorry if you’re still mad me for leaving a mess! I promise it won’t happen again…!”
Kogasa was vainly hoping she would be met with some form of reassurance, that the disembodied voice would console and pamper her if she openly displayed her vulnerability. Maybe if she vocalized all her innermost thoughts, if she poured her heart out, she would receive more of the attention she desperately craved. The lingering whir of static meant they were still there on the other side, right? If they were still there, still present, and still listening.. she would be satisfied with that.
"You won't be getting a response, you know?"
Kogasa's head snapped back towards the direction of the callous remark. Some ingrained, deep-seated thought residing in the back of her mind expected this, repeating this familiar song and dance all over again. Tatara sat with her legs crossed, dangling over edge of her bed. She was leaning back slightly as her outstretched arms propped her body upright. Why was she always like this..? So casual about everything. So cold and indifferent to her suffering. So infuriatingly unsympathetic at times.. but then what was all of that from before? Her pessimistic twin also acted warm and nurturing, allowing her the opportunity to feel a sense of cathartic liberation. The dichotomy was jarring. It was like a walking contradiction. A counterweight to her optimism.. nudging her to ground herself in reality, no matter how cruel it was. If she truly was a part of herself.. then what does that mean? Where does her real self start and where did it end? Kogasa's eyes dimmed for a moment, her gaze trailing downwards as she released a deep exhale.
"Yeah, I know.. but you don't have to remind me."
Kogasa gripped the side of her arm, her eyes fluttering closed as she slumped down onto her knees and hung her head. Everything was just so overwhelming. Being left to exist inside her head like this, the ugliest aspects buried deep within her prying and clawing to get out, and sheer helplessness of it all. But maybe Tatara has a point. If leftover remnants of her pride were still resisting, then maybe that was the source of her continued agony. She just has to.. let go.
"Well, as long as you understand, then we shouldn't have a problem~!"
Tatara rocked in her seat, whimsically humming to herself before a metallic echo rang through the room. She immediately shifted her gaze towards the door, the hatch at the base flipping open again as a plastic tray was pressed through.
"Oh.. that was quick."
The hatch clicked back closed in place as silence hung over the room again. Kogasa had difficulty finding the energy to move from her spot, but the persistent and pestering sense of hunger outweighed her fatigue. Lifting her head, her eyes flickered open as she scanned over her room. The fluorescent... white lights above. The barren, smooth walls. The unkempt, empty bed. The imposing metallic door. And.. the plastic tray, but on it was the furthest thing from what could be traditionally considered as "food." Hunching over, she crawled across the floor to closer inspect what she had just been given.
It was an unexpected assortment of bizarre items. There was a flat, circular black pad with a cord jutting out of it with the tail end being a box-shaped plug. Next to it was a rectangular palm-sized mirror, but the glass was too opaque. She could barely make out the haggard reflection of her face. Accompanying these artifacts were a set of two manuals, presumably one for each object. She was going to fed with.. whatever this was? Huh..? None of it made any sense to her.
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Kogasa attempted to peruse over the manuals, but most of the terminology flew over her head completely. The visual aids that were provided did give her a rough idea of how these gadgets were meant to be used, however. She reached over, gripping what she previously thought was an opaque, black mirror as her thumb tapped the glass surface as it flickered to life. It had completely slipped her mind; she had in fact seen a device similar to this before. It was that eccentric, teenage glasses girl again. She sat back on her heels, closing her eyes and reminiscing for a moment.
It was a cool autumn evening. Kogasa was hidden amongst the foliage near a cobble path, stationed near the outskirts of the Myouren Temple and awaited her next victim with bated breath. Soon enough, a series of footsteps echoed from the distance, gradually drawing closer. Accompanying it was the faint sound of.. something, muffled rattling inside a container of some sort. Her ears perked up at the sound of a young lady talking to herself.
"Morichika-san said to drop off these beads... somewhere around here.."
The patter of footsteps stopped close by, followed by a clunk as the package of beads was laid on the ground.
"Hnnnnngh...! Ah.. So tired."
This was it! The perfect opportunity to catch this poor, naive soul unawares! A smug grin enveloped Kogasa's face as she readied herself, hunching over like a predator moments before pouncing on their prey. She stalked closer, her footsteps feather-light, brushing her body and umbrella gently against the flora to avoid signaling her presence. She could see the vague outline of her target with her back turned. A human..! But.. with an unusual getup, atypical from the kimonos usually worn back at the Human Village. Regardless, none of that mattered now! Kogasa jumped out from the woodworks, her arms raised high as she cried out.
"BERO BERO BAA~!!!"
The strange girl twitched slightly, glancing slowly over at Kogasa as an incredulous expression was strewn across her face. A moment of awkward stillness hung between the two, a brief gust of wind causing their skirts to flutter. Her eyes widened as a look of recognition dawned over her, suddenly beaming back and ogling the poor youkai as she exclaimed.
"Ohh.. no way! An authentic kasa-okabe, what a classic!"
She raised a rectangular, white slab decorated with haphazard shapes as a flash of light struck back directly at Kogasa's eyes, causing her to wince and recoil back. Her head turned away and her open palms stretched out in front of her in an attempt to block the glare.
"Gaaah! What the heck..?! What was that for?!"
The fedora capped girl turned her attention back down at the slab, tapping away at a brisk pace with a self-satisfied smirk plastered over her. And she was completely ignoring the youkai that had tried and failed to frighten her just seconds before, causing Kogasa to slump and stew in a momentary bout of depression.
"Ahh.. another bust, huh? Humans these days really are..."
Her voice trailed off as she glanced up, quietly peeking back at the preoccupied girl mumbling to herself.
"... definitely posting it on Insta later, it'll be so lit."
Kogasa squinted her eyes in confusion, the bizarre girl's archaic language simply entering her ear and exiting out the other. Standing upright again, she took a tentative step closer and tried calling out with an anxious smile.
"U-Um.. excuse..?"
The girl's eyes darted up back at her, curiously tilting her head.
"Hm? What is it, Kasa-chan?"
Kogasa's smile instantly cracked as a pang of indignation flared up from within her. The sheer audacity of this girl, already so nonchalant and overfamiliar towards a fearsome youkai like her! But, even a condescending, cutesy nickname like that.. if it was specialized and unique to only her, it wasn't necessarily the worst. She let out a heavy shuddering sigh, the tension escaping her body as she raised a finger and pointed at the baffling object the girl was holding close to her chest.
"What.. is that? That.. thing in your hands."
The girl stood momentarily bewildered, dropping her gaze downwards before glancing back up, raising the object in her grip.
"Oh, this.. my phone? Never seen a kind like this? Well, I guess that makes sense."
Kogasa's eyes fluttered open, staring back at the metal door in a daze before dropping her attention down to the smartphone in her hands. Or she thinks that's what they're called.. if her memory served her correctly. That brazen girl had taught her the basics, letting her fiddle with the device. And it was surprisingly versatile, being an amalgamation of gadgets she's seen from the tengu and kappa. A camera, telephone, television, computer... even a notepad if needed too. Kogasa was a seasoned craftsman, having forged and repaired a countless list of weapons, accessories, and trinkets. But something like this was far beyond her expertise, but yet ultimately a tool.. just like her.