File: HI ANON.png (155.1 KB)

>>43262273
I'm sure Twilight wouldn't mind a colt calling her adorable

>>43262273
Any updates on the Sunburst green and The Long and Short of it?

>>43262277
She would turn into an awkward mess.

File: THELIGHTBRINGER.png (363.6 KB)

>>43262280
It'll be out when it's out!

File: 1754410107732616.png (68.0 KB)

>>43262400
GET HER THE HELL OUT OF HERE! THROW HER OUT IN THE COLD, DON'T GIVE HER HER JACKET!

>>43261546
I want to pamper an olympian level mare wife.

File: trixie_freaking_out.gif (1.7 MB)

>Be Anon
>Leaving Ponyville's arcade
>Had fun playing Equestria's version of Joust
>Kinda showed off to the mares who think colts can't play games
>Notice that one blue showpony you've seen on posters is just outside as you leave
>"Uhm, excuse me"
>You turn to see the wizard mare. Her voice cracked cutely as she was speaking
>"Trixie is enamored with you, human"
>She’s attractive, but what does she mean by enamoured? Just Interested that you’re human? or does she mean romantically? Anyway, why does she talk like that? Must be one hell of an ego
"Are… you speaking in 3rd person?"
>Doesn’t matter…, just listen to me”
"I'm listening"
>"Trixie would like to pay you for something"
"I'm employed already"
>"No, Anon, it's not a job. Trixie wants to purchase something from you"
>You shift in bewilderment as Trixie closes in the gap between you
>"I'll pay you 20 bits, Anon"
"For what?"
>"Please don't tell anypony, Anon, but I need..."
>Trixie rubs her forehoof in discomfort
>"A service, and maybe a few more bits for something else too, and if you don’t mind, this conversation never happened""
>Trixie hastily gets out her vague request, and it leaves you puzzled
>What's this all about?
“Service for what? I’m not fixing your wagon just because i have hands”
>"No, that’s not it Anon”
>Trixie finally musters up the courage, “Trixie wants to sniff you"
>Just about every faculty of your brain stops its usual function
"WHAT?!"
>"Please! Be quiet before somepony hears. I just need to-to... smell you, and then-"
"Oh you’re one of those types who gets off on the smell of stallions?… and i guess you have a human fetish too, huh?"
>Trixie's face is bright red as you mercilessly call her out bluntly in surprise. Funny enough, you did run out of bits for the Pony Defender arcade machine
>You remember how stallions are the ones who’d most likely whore themselves out in Equestria’s reversed roles, and it makes you chuckle internally
>Maybe there’s money to be made?
"What's the other thing that you wanted to pay me extra for?"
>Trixie is shamefully looking back at you, blushing, yet seemingly into the thrill of asking you for such naughty things
>"Trixie will require... your underwear"
>You chuckle just a bit and Tsk Tsk her
>Trixie seems like she's about to run away before you report her to the royal guard for being a sexual deviant
"You know what?" Trixie raises her eyelids to intake what you'll say, "throw in an extra 10 bits for the underwear, and you got a deal
>”Really?! Oh please let me smell them!”
>You hold up your hands as she’s about to latch onto you
“Shouldn’t we, like, go into the alley if we’re going to do this?”
>”Right, Lead the way, my fair human”

File: 1089374__suggestive_artist-colon-nobody_oc_oc+only_oc-colon-anon_dragon_aftersex_bite+mark_burn_burnt_cuddling_dragoness_female_human+on+dragon+snuggling_injure.png (24.2 KB)

Hello everyone I literally never come in these threads cuz y'all are weird. However I do share the exact same brain illness as you. I practically never envision the dudes being in charge anymore when I'm glorkin' it. Especially when I'm thinking about Ponies. I have long ago just accepted the headcanon that in Pony world it's the mares who are expected to pursue and to dominate, while the males are supposed to sit and look pretty and do whatever the mares want them to. It's a girls' empowerment franchise after all.

However I acknowledge this is unrealistic, and knowing that does kinda spoil the fantasy desu. My question is thus: Which MLP race is the most likely, and most plausible, to REALISTICALLY be female-dominant?

We have what.....2 dozen sapient races in this show? And most of them are biologically VERY different from each other. I think just by sheer odds, a couple of the races actually WOULD have reverse gender roles.....The question is which ones? Here's some of my thoughts.

>changelings
Practically confirmed. I know we have King Thorax but that feels like an anomaly due to his specific rise to power. Also Thorax's hive no longer has a queen. I'm sure if a new one were born, the typical expectation for Changelings would be that queens are supposed to be in charge. If not politically, then certainly sexually. There's no way a literal queen insect isn't the most sexually dominant one in the hive. She runs the show, that's the whole point of hive insects.

>dragons
While I don't think this is likely based on the aggressive teenage dudebro shtick the dragons in MLP have, it's worth mentioning. Mammals are nearly all male-dominant, but this biological trend is often broken in non-mammals. In many lizard & reptile species, the females are the larger and more aggressive ones. I enjoy the idea that this would apply to Dragons even tho obviously show evidence doesn't support it (Outside of Ember being a badass mf).

>lamia
They're not actually real so I can say they're female-dominant and you're not allowed to tell me I'm wrong. Seriously tho, in 2/3rds of all snake species the female is larger, often significantly so. And in most snakes the males literally can't impregnate the females by force cuz she's able to divert unwanted sperm into a false vaginal duct. And in most snakes it's the females who initiate sex. So Lamia are def a reverse gender roles race.

1/2

File: 1742067040851766.jpg (412.4 KB)

>>43262658
>You make your way out of sight of possible onlookers in the shaded alley
>Trixie approaches you, almost vibrating in her feral lust
>Her snout gets closer to your junk
>Trixie’s eyes blink up at you then back to your clothed crotch
>Closes her eyes and presses her muzzle gently into your frank and beans
*Sniff* *SNIIIIIIIIIF*
>the sniffs are followed by horsey snorts and it seems that there’s small tremors her body experiences
>She loves it
>Trixie smells you and reaches and hoof backward to touch herself as she murmurs bizarre Trixie-things
>”Oh, Trixie, you’re going to get yourself in trouble sniffing these colts, humfff… You smell so good Anon,” she mouths to herself on autopilot
>There’s a couple of shlicks as she hoofs herself
>”Yesssss… Trixie loves it”
>this goes on for a few minutes
>Get hard and she nuzzles your boner
>You decide these deeds, which are inching towards full on maregasm, are above the 20 bit paygrade
“Alright, that’s enough. You’re entering into the 50 bit territory”
>”OH, PLEASE, I’m getting close!”
“Nope”
>You pull her away from your crotch, and begin to take off your pants
>”Hmmph! Trixie was enjoying herself, monkey”
>She quickly loses her smart attitude as you begin to undress
>Trixie is biting her lip in excitement as you take off your underwear
>”Nice cock, anon. Gosh, I wish I could make you my house husband.”
>You hand her the underwear and roll your eyes
“Maybe you should’ve just asked me to be your tradcolt husband instead of just trying to whore me out for my monkey stink”
>”Dang it! Trixie never thought of that! Stallions are so picky, and it’s hard to ask them out,” Trixie admits with puppy dog eyes and stomps her hoof
>You pat her shoulder in half sympathy
“Yeah, well, anyway, I need that payment”
>”Fine, here’s your bits: 20 for the smells and 10 for the undies”
>Noice
>Now you can break the arcade records for sure with this shit
>Trixie wastes no time and deeply inhales the area of your underwear that held your balls
>Hoofs herself
>”OH YESSSSS”
>”Anon, can I suck you off for a few bits more?”
“How many more bits do yah got?”
>"Trixie has 20 more"


Hey, twenty bits is twenty bits

>>43262664
>y'all
Go back

>>43262664
>Which MLP race is the most likely, and most plausible, to REALISTICALLY be female-dominant?
Every single one. They're not actually real so I can say they're female-dominant and you're not allowed to tell me I'm wrong.

File: 1974171__safe_edit_edited+screencap_editor-colon-lolledits_screencap_autumn+blaze_kirin_g4_my+little+pony-colon-+friendship+is+magic_sounds+of+silence_-colon-p_.gif (2.3 MB)

2/2

>unicorns
I don't think they're fem-dominant but I see the potential. Telekinesis makes a person's physical strength essentially irrelevant in a fight, so male and female Unicorns are on even terms in regards to their power level and who is capable of overpowering whom. Since their mares can very easily fight back, I think Unicorns would be egalitarian, but the fact Unicorns are strongly associated with femininity makes we wonder if Unicorn mares have a bit of an edge over the stallions.

>kirin
Oh yeah they're absolutely female-dominant, no question. Thier telekinesis at LEAST makes the 2 sexes equal, but it's really the face design that tells you Kirin males are the beta ones.

It's clear just from how they look that Kirins are an offshoot cousin of Unicorns, they're just way too visually similar to Ponies to not be biologically related, distantly. There could be a few ways that happened, but the POINT is that at some point after they branched off from Ponies, Kirins must have once had males with boxier square faces like literally every other Pony type. But as they evolved they lost this trait, and I assert this is certainly via sexual selection. The only fucking way Kirin males would EVER evolve to be less macho-looking is if, over many generations, Kirin females intentionally selected cuter-looking males because that's what they find attractive. The macho Kirin genes died out because they they were less sexually popular, and female Kirins seek soft-featured males with submissive traits. Therefore I ASSERT that Kirin are among the most likely races to have reverse gender roles where the males are expected to look cute, do what they are told and do theecooking and cleaning for their fiery Kirin wife who takes charge and actually runs shit. Also a Kirin in heat is probably.....unruly.

Okay autism done.

>>43262672
Unicorns aren't a different species from ponies, retard.

File: fluttermad.png (695.9 KB)

>>43262664
Ummmm mares are most likely to be dominant. all the other stuff you listed is wack

>>43262673
your reading comprehension is zero

>>43262664
>y'all
No, just no.

>>43262677
Your not-being-a-blithering-retard comprehension is zero.

>>43262665
Anon what have you done? You've whored yourself out! Now no mare will take you.

File: 1768864181086831.gif (57.9 KB)

>>43262665
>Hey, twenty bits is twenty bits
Do monkeysluts really?

File: 1645157601383.gif (1.2 MB)

>>43262744
Mares could huff and puff me for free.

File: maxresdefault (4).jpg (168.4 KB)

I got in trouble today with the stal pals
I really like this one mare I met at Ponemart at 3AM while I was filming some video and generally making life difficult for minimum wage employees. The problem is the guys don't like her because she has buck-teeth and a lisp and only ever talks about giant monster movies but I really like her.
Should I orchestrate my own death and then run away with her to the Fillypines?

>>43262752
>Be Spike
>You and Twilight are at Sweet Apple Acres helping Applejack get apples
>What a twist, am I right?
>Apple is saying something or other about who the fuck cares when Big Mac walks by
>Twilight lets out a goonish groan
>"I hate to see him go, but I love to watch him leave."
>You wish you didn't have earholes

File: 1765748983450992.gif (2.2 MB)

>>43262761
Only a c*lt would be stupid enough to care what another c*lt thinks

>>43262774
Have sex, marecel

>>43262672
Every species in MLP is matriarchal. If you wander into a back alley in spring you're as likely as not to find a bunch of rowdy queens taking turns shredding themselves on the same tom.

>>43262777
Simp, or seething coltoid? Call it.

>>43262777
She can’t. All the moon dust have irradiated her reproductive organs.

>>43262845
The moon dust crusted her pussy shut
You need a hammer and chisel to get through it

>>43262854
>"Didst thouOWOWOW! OW! Didst THOUST get throughst yetst?!"
"I'm workin' on it! I'm workin' on it!!"
>clink clink clink clink
>"OW! FUCKST!"
>She kicks Anon in the both his nipples
>"Just fuckesth my mouthst insteadest, knave!"

File: use_a_cast_cutter_you_dumbass.jpg (13.5 KB)

>>43262854
>>43262950
Anon are you really dumb enough to try a hammer and chisel?

File: Drill-Rotary-Hammer-Heavy-Duty-Tool-Hire-225012023.jpg (127.0 KB)

>>43262958
Alright, well, while you two are busy tickling the moon dust, I'll be getting my dick guillotined by lunar marecel cunt

>>43262762
Tamers slop?
Tamers peak.

File: got ya there didnt i.png (37.9 KB)

>>43262958
>am I dumb enough
Did you even have to ask? Now who's the dumb one, dummy?

>>43262964
See, this guy knows what he's doing. EXCEPT THERES NO ELECTRICITY IN SPACE, STUPID! Chiselchads can't stop winning, bit by bit im gonna see those bits first while you guys dork around with your "technology" and "intelligence"

File: EverStart-Value-Lead-Acid-Automotive-Battery-Group-Size-78-12-Volt-600-CCA_c3501c37-37bd-4017-9e26-60fec0bbab72.afc4b23ba6e335371af7be73df625e75-3346219580.jpg (192.6 KB)

>>43262973
>EXCEPT THERES NO ELECTRICITY IN SPACE, STUPID!
Good thing I brought my own.

>>43262976
...can I borrow your drill? I need it for something

File: brickluna.png (2.8 MB)

>>43262845
>>43262854
>>43262958
>>43262964
I'm on to you anon

>>43262976
>Using EverStart Value instead of EverStart Maxx

>>43262995
bro murdered the thread

>>43262964
Is that thing built to cut through hard stuff while leaving soft tissues undamaged?

>>43262995
A brickhouse.

>>43262273
>Twilight was willing to go great lengths to obtain a mythical human husbando for herself.
>Love potion? Want-it-need-it spell? Copying Cadance's love spell?
>She was willing to do all that and bear the punishment the alicorn of Love with a capital L would inevitably wreak upon her, as long as the feeling of crippling loneliness would go away. If only she could find the one...
>Tartarus, even a diet wouldn't be off the table if it came to that.
>However Fate would seem to have other plans that particular Tuesday at the Grand Canterlot Library.
>One second she was gawking at a long-legged, sharply-dressed, sock-wearing specimen of Anon Sapiens, and the next second she was on her back, having her belly rubbed like a little filly, while being called prettiest mare said human has ever seen.
>She could swear she saw hearts in his eyes, despite him not having any.
>A couple of seconds later she was unceremoniously carried out of the building with all her books, leaving the librarian in a state of abject envy.
>Twilight would be embarrassed by being marehandled but, first, she was held gentler than a newborn colt, and second, getting kissed on her snoot derailed that specific train of thought repeatedly.
>In no time at all, she was at her home, reading the same book she was at the library, but sitting in the lap of her human, who has enveloped her in his warm embrace.
>He promised to cook for her once they were done with this chapter.
>Wait.
>Stallion? Being into reading?
>Being an even faster reader than she was?!
>Drawing parallels to his alien literature and willing to discuss it?!?
>Twilight was about to pinch herself, but stopped. If this was a dream, she didn't want it to end.
>Somewhere far away, a certain pink alicorn was looking at a crystal ball and giggling.

Good morning I hate stallions

>>43264210
>t. Luna

>>43263674
Candy stepping in before Twilight made a mistake.

>>43264210
They don't care and will never look your way.

>>43264210
Kazakhstan what're you doing in Equestria

>>43264832
I read this in BlazeTheMovieFan's voice

Do you think Flutters is so shy because she has to live with the knowledge that her brother is an absolute fucking whore?

>>43264915
>Constantly scared of meeting new ponies because she's paranoid about them somehow linking her to the most popular OnlyFeathers model on the PonyNet

>>43264923
Since when is Fluttershy on OnlyFeathers? Link?

File: link.jpg (59.9 KB)

>>43265011
>Link?

>>43265034
It appears you have played me for a fool... well done. Time to clop for 7 hours and cry into my stallion body pillow again

>>43264923
Such is the butter social cycle
>I see somepony
>I'm very pleased to make their acquaintance
>They tell me "Oh, you like pets? My friends and I made your brother drink our squirt out of a dog bowl once."
>I run home crying

>>43258902
>Sure thing, you have better things to do than to hang out in some damp dark cave.
>Like getting smooched by your marefriend.
>A low, guttural groan reverberates through the cave, raising the hair on the back of your neck.
>Waxy looks at you, disquieted, while you scan the dark for the possible source, fruitlessly.
>The odd mare continues in a perfect monotone,
>"Excuse me, I skipped the lunch today"
>She looks at the ceiling as if she's telling the time using the sun.
>Except instead of sun there's rocks and crystals.
>"It's about time I resupply, so I'm going to follow you up"
>Indeed she pulls out a big-ass ladder from... somewhere, and places it with habitual ease.
"Thanks"
>Deciding not to spend the rest of the day here, let alone getting on the oddly emotionally-stunted mare's nerves, you climb up.
>Waxy's eyes flashing with the reflected light betray her checking you out, seemingly mildly impressed with the ease you climb up.
>You pause for a bit and waggle your eyebrows at her,
"Opposable thumbs, just you wait, I'll show you what they can do later this evening"
>She bites her lip.
>Hook, line and sinker, she'll never see those ear-rubs coming!
>Not wishing to test the patience of the mare who was considerate enough to hold still the ladder you cling to, you resume the ascent.
>Ahh, fresh air.
>As soon as you pull your sorry ass out of the hole, Crescent flies straight out like a bat out of hell, doing a somersault and landing, chest tuft puffed out proudly on display.
"Nice!"
>The mare in a mining helmet and a smock climbs right after her, pulling the ladder with her and stowing it... somewhere...
>You try not to dwell too much on it.
>What you dwell on is the continuous rumble rapidly growing in volume.
>With a practiced motion you pick both mares up and take a WIIIIDE step back, putting them on the ground.
>The fight cloud rolls by, filled with flashes of hooves, wings, horns and fangs.
>Losing some speed and making a loop like a miniature tornado, it begins to slowly circle around the warning signs near the hole.
>At least it's a small-ish fight cloud, were it a bit bigger, it'd have good odds of growing into a straight up fog of war.
>Waxy shakes her head and looks at you in disbelief,
>"Does this happen often around these parts?"
"You have no idea"
>Wait, are those changelings? Is it Tuesday already?
>"OOF!"
>A familiar orange mare gets launched out of the cloud, skidding to a stop beside you.
>Once she sees you, she springs up with a nasty smile. Her untimely advances get interrupted, though,
>"Applejack, stop flirting with the stallion, we need your help here!"
>AJ groans in displeasure,
>"Alright, Ah'm coming!"
>She gives you what she must imagine to be a sultry look, and in the interest of of public entertainment you decide not to address that particular misconception,
>"Ah'll be seein' you, pardner"
>The odd mare keeps talking at the cloud in her monotone,
"Pinkie- Pinkie, the ground is unstable, you need to move"

File: IMG_4223.jpg (32.0 KB)

>write the most Chuck Tingle cumbrained brapfics imaginable about Princess Celestia going to Griffonstone and gassing them all into submission
>#14 on the year's bestseller, readers thought it was deep political insight on the state of relations with Griffonstone
>Write a few more
>Celestia is pissed you wrote three novels about her farting on creatures, Luna wonders why she isn't in the books
>Narrowly avoid prison, have to flee to Griffonstone accidentally into the arms of your weirdly loving fanbase

>>43265744
>>Narrowly avoid prison, have to flee to Griffonstone accidentally into the arms of your weirdly loving fanbase
if griffins like you does that mean they only charge you half the usual usurious interest rates?

>>43265754
Depends, some griffons make you pay in other ways... if you're a stallion, at least.

>Be anon
>Martial arts autist
>Used to practice BJJ before going to Equestria
>Still getting used to a world full of sexist mares who think you can't defend yourself
>They always scoff at the idea of you being a martial artist
>Walking alone one night you hear yelling from the local guards
>They are chasing a hooded mare as ponies look from their windows
>The thieving mare is running towards you
>It's your time to shine
>To tackle her to the ground and pin her down
>She tries to break free by bucking you in the face
>Before she's able to, you wrap your legs around her neck and begin to choke her out
>The guards are simply staring at you in bewilderment as the thief desperately tries to break free
>The thief lets out a half moan, half groan before passing out
>Underneath her hood she has a blissful look on her face
>Everyone else is staring at you, their faces beet red
>The next morning several mares knock on your door, offering themselves to let you practice your choking techniques with them

File: link if he equestria.png (251.0 KB)

>>43265011
Here's link.

>>43266001
>BJJ
Blowjobjob?

>>43265640
Hope they all don't fall down in Maud's cave system.

>>43266001
So that's how you start a Dojo.

>>43266447
Quit being catty, Caramel

>>43265640
>A lanky Changeling goes flying out of the fight cloud and practically into the stratosphere
>"WAAAHAHAAAaaaaa!"
>Aaaaaand it's a Homerun! She goes through a cloud and disappears from sight
>GGRRRRGGUUGGGRR
>The ground is now actively shaking
>The cave mare pushes you about 3 feet to the right, then picks up Waxy and holds her over her own head.
>"Whoa, what's going on?" Waxy looks at you, then down at her.
>Without another warning, a geyser shoots up right at the spot you had been standing. Another geyser blasts up underneath the fight cloud right as it was beginning to dissipate
>3 mares and a black bug ride the geyser up into the air a good 20 feet, all disoriented from the sudden burst. Hmmm... looks like Pinkie, Applejack, and Twilight Sparkle? Catching them must have been urgent
"Well... looks like they got that under control. Where's the Hell Bats practice going on again?"
>The cave mare sets Waxy down as the geyser next to you recedes back into the ground. Warm water bubbles up from the hole you were just inside of.
>The cave mare looks down at the dark water, then without another word, she throws on some scuba tanks, some flippers, and dives right in. Waxy is left blinking in disbelief.
>"...this is just-"
"Eh, pretty normal. Let's bounce, batty."
>"...Ponyville is crazy. I kind of like it." She grins. "I think the field is..."
>Waxy sniffs the air a few times, then turns around. "It's this way. Follow me, slim~"
>She trots ahead a few steps, then really rolls those hips. Good gravy, she's soft in all the right spots... she likes that your eyes are glued on her.

>Leaving behind all the chaos on main street, you and Waxy hike up a trail and wind up on a hill. There's a massive willow tree up here next to a pond... it's very serene.
>"Okay, it's a little early... let's see if the girls are here."
>Waxy takes a deep breath, then opens her mouth. No sound... but you know better now. Looking up at the tree, a few pairs of groggy eyes blink open in the dark branches.
>After a few moments, 4 bats ponies swoop on down.
>"Crescent? What's up? It's still daylight out..." one bemoans her as she yawns wide. Do they all have those sharp fangs?
>Waxy puts a wing around your waist and pulls you close. "This... is my coltfriend, Anon. I wanted to show him what the Hell Bats are made of!"
>Hmm... looks like counting Waxy, there's 5 batponies here.
>"Hey, where's Lagrange and Tycho? They're not with you?"
>One of the sleepy bats raises a hoof as she finishes a yawn. "Oh, they're down at the farm getting some apples."
"...wait, do you mean Sweet Apple Acres?"
>"Yeah, the apple farm." She nods. Waxy just gives you a look then an awkward smile to her friends.
>"Uh... guys, I... sorta got busted. She caught me last night."
>The other girls look at each other. "Oh. Was she mad?"
>"Hopping mad. She actually had my big sexy boy here tied to a tree for getting into the cider apples."
>They look you up and down. "Oh no... are you okay, Anon?!"

>>43262995
>Be Anon
>One day you get a letter.
>You're hired by the crown and sworn to secrecy
>No, you don't get a say in it, but the pay in, like, really good. Talking early retirement good.
>Despite all that, the letter doesn't say WHAT EXACTLY they need you to do.
>Alrighty, then.
>Travel to the Canterlot castle to see the princesses personally, as per the request.
>Celestia has guards exit the throne room, leaving you both alone.
>After dancing around the issue she spills the beans.
>They need you to apply your industrial mining experience to design and... use shaped charges that'd punch though moonbutt's moon butt-crust.
>She hasn't gotten any dicking in more than a thousand years, which explains her attitude.
>A week full of explosions and exasperation later, you finally manage to do it.
>Almost a hundred pounds worth of dynamite does the job... and makes her cum on the spot.
>Turns out, satisfied moonbutt is much more amiable and a bit jealous and possessive, if you being aggressively snuggled is of any indication.
>More than that, she wants YOU to quite literally booty-blast her every day.
>Explosions happily ever after.

>>43266760
Poor bats, waking up an unLunaly hours.

>>43266937
Somehow you find Maud in there mining.

>>43266009
I'll bet the dense motherfucker still doesn't realize he's got like 4 mares interested in him. I suppose 5 counting Epona.

>>43268097
He's too busy getting bits for the lamp oil, rope and bombs.

>>43266001
Any mares we are used to, which of the mane 6 show up and do any princesses. Come and see

>>43268102
he needs those bits, the stallion at the store can't give credit so he has to come back when he's a little richer

>>43268102
What mare is letting this stallion go around with bombs!?
>Sees Breezie floating next to him.
Ah, I see.

>>43268102
Guess that means I have free reign to hit on the pagan horse goddess.

>>43268797
FUCK why can't I get a breezie gf?!

>>43263674
Heh, for some reason, just had a thought of Twilight trying to make a love potion for Anon, going to great lengths to get all the ingredients for it, but being able to figure out what the last one even is, let alone where to buy it.
>"Seed of Homo Sapien? What kind of plant even is that? Where do I get the seed of it? Augh! Why is it so hard to get a hoomin to love me!"

>>43268858
You want them nagging your ear all day?
>”Hey, listen!”

>>43266760
"Just barely, Waxy dropped in at juuuust the right time to prevent the Apples from sacrificing my virginity in the name of The Great Apple or something."
>You drop down and give the rapidly-reddening bat mare a side-hug.
>Her friends swarm her, bapping her on the shoulders in approval,
>"Good going, Wax, you lucky dog you!"
>"What a catch, what a catch!"
>As if wishing to switch the subject, she bursts forward and spins around to face you
>"Let's show him what Hell Bats are made of!"
>Not wasting a second, she leaps into the air, followed by excited, if a little sleepy, bats.
>Assembling into a formation, they do a wide banking turn away from you...
>Only to pull off a synchronized Immelmann back towards you and split dramatically,
>Your eyes can barely keep up with them all - the outermost perform daring Kulbits, while the headliners perform a series of Cobra maneuvers-
>It's like hopscotch in reverse!
>They finally join up, making a series of sharp banking turns in very close formation, slowly homing in on you
>What about the classics?
>You wave your hands and yell,
"DO A BARREL ROLL!"
>And they do, weaving in a thatch formation, no less!
>Damn, they need some smoke trails, maybe some lights and it'd make an absolutely kickass show!
>You see Waxy turn up, climbing higher and higher until gravity reasserts itself, only for Waxy to defy it, dropping into a perfect Bell Tailslide.
>Finally they split into three groups - two pairs and a loner - and first pair splits and then rushes together towards one another, only to pull up at the last second, hooves meeting with a dull "CLOKK!"
>They leap off each other, and the second pair climbs up right past them, repeating the same breakneck maneuver, while the loner - Waxy - threads the needle between them repeatedly.
>You barely can register the movement as the first pair is climbing past the second one and fall apart only to do a nasty Kulbit and repeat the climb.
>Finally they all break away and fall to the ground, slowing at the last possible moment to drop into a showoff pose.
>You just clap, shaking your head at their mischief.
"Impressive. Very nice."
>Waxy's snoot is raised to the sky, she's practically glowing with pride, even though her breathing is heavy.
>A perfect opportunity!
>You descend upon her unprotected bat earsies.

File: 1775229092168669.png (955.5 KB)

>stallion talking

>>43270277
I'm talking.

>>43270277
Why does she have a big rump and why is she not using it to get colts in her kitchen?

>>43270312
She's a sub 8 mare

>>43262664
The theme of RGRE is based off of the gender disparity shown in the show. There are far more mares than stallions. This is not strictly a femdom fetish but also a harem one.

>>43269737
Nice show, but now you owe them 5 bits. Price of the standard ticket.

File: 8674387917.png (327.5 KB)

Are there any greens about RGRE Luna? Her being a mega-sexist arouses me.

>>43270566
It'd be fun to see her struggle with modern day Equestria in that manner, like she's got 'racist grandmother' vibes but she legitimately is trying to be open and inviting to others (and usually failing by dropping a hard Z-R on zebras and telling colts to 'smile and look cute')

File: 1767674035785430.jpg (214.6 KB)

>>43270684
>Luna sees (you) for the first time
>"Sister, you told us prostitutes were made illegal several hundred years ago!"
How do you respond without sounding slutty?

>>43270984
>that luna
Dios mio...

File: 189471785.png (206.4 KB)

>>43270984
>"It's free for alicorns, toots!"
>picrel

>>43270984
>>43271001
You gotta out sexist the old hag.

>>43271001
rude, I just wanted to hold Luna's hooves with my own hoof.

>>43271001
Seconds before Luna was savagely beat with a flip-flop. She tried flying away, but the darned thing had almost heat-seeking properties.

>>43271001
>Luna's not actually angry she just likes beating her prostitutes

>>43271164
Hopefully he’ll punch back too. Get the blood really pumping.

>>43271187
>Turns out all Luna really needed was some good ole masochism
I knew she was freaky, but damn!

>>43271187
I hope not since I come here to think about boys getting overpowered

There was a brief period where, due to progression of stallion's rights causing beating your husband to become highly taboo, some stallions took up work as "batter prostitutes". While sexual prostitution was illegal, batter prostitutes were, technically, legal, under laws regarding duels and right to combat. These batter prostitutes were used as an external outlet for mares' natural desire to physically discipline colts. Batter prostitution would eventually also be outlawed when it became common for mares to leave their husbands for their favorite batter prostitutes, leading to the husbands to demand the crown to act.

>>43271205
Yeah, I wanna see her tie Anon to the bed and drain him for being such a lewd little slut, that's the way it should be in a mare's world. He makes the seed, he gives it to her. That's his only purpose.

>>43269737
>"A-anon! Staahp~" She says, clearly not actually wishing for this to stop at all. You see her eyes roll back briefly as her lids close
>The other batmares are giggling while they watch
>The giggles soon quiet down as all four heads start leaning in, realizing just what those two hands of yours are capable of. There's some hushed whispers as Waxy leans into your hands, her fluffy little ears all yours for the scratchin'
>Oh! Her left rearleg lifts a bit, kicking softly at the air. She's in heaven and the Hell Bats know it
>As the ear rubs get a little softer and your pull a hand away, you can feel her head follow your digits, desperately wanting you to continue forever. She falls up against you, cheek first
>"Heeeey... uh, Waaaxy..." One of the mares looks at you with her slit eyes quite dilated, even in the evening sun.
>"Nope. He's all mine, gals." Waxy cuts her off, then wraps her forelegs and wings around you. "Did you really like the show?"
"Of course! I don't even think the Wonderbolts do half those moves."
>The lanky batmare that's closest to you and Waxy leans her head back, beaming with smug pride. "And that wasn't even half of our moves. You should see when all seven of us are together."
"Right, you were saying two of your girls were... at the farm?"
>Waxy puts a hoof on your thigh as she gets back up on all fours. "Ah, don't worry, Anon. You saw how hard it was to find me yesterday. I'm sure they're already on their way back."
>The other bats look skyward and around the willow tree. "...you know, they probably should be back by now. I could go check and see if they're alright."
>Waxy looks at the concern on their faces. "...if you do, just remember to do a flyover. Don't get too close, got it? That apple farmer is really good with her lasso."
>The long-legged bat rolls her eyes. "Yeah, good luck catching Moonray. They won't even see me."
>"Just be careful, Moony." Wax sighs.
>Lunging into the air with whisper-quiet wing flaps, she practically vanishes into the sky, headed toward the farm.
"Hope she actually listens."
>"She should be fine. Moonray's the captain of the Hell Bats. She's the best flyer out of all of us." The other three bats nod in agreement with Waxy.
"Wanna sit by the pond?"
>"Sure! We have to see the moonrise on the water. It's gorgeous when the fireflies come out." She smiles sweetly, gripping your hand with her wingclasp.

>A few hours pass as night falls and your buzz has officially worn off. Despite it being a chilly autumn night, you feel comfortable in your snazzy suit with a cute bat on your lap to warm you up.
>As the moon rises in the water's reflection, you can't help but notice... Moonray hasn't come back yet.
"...Wax, you don't think that Applejack... got them, do you?"
>She skips a stone on the water's glassy surface. "Hate to admit it, but... she really should have been back already."
>You gulp. It might be risky... but hey, you have a rape whistle this time!
"We need to go find them."

>>43271400
Apple thieves getting caught. Now they're tied up.

>>43271400
This is good, stay.

>>43271400
They probably found the cider and got drunk.

>>43270984
Start crying and weeping and withering into a dehydrated sad husk of myself

File: 1776640603792834.gif (1.1 MB)

>>43271856
>Comes back from the moon
>First thing she does is make a colt cry
Holy based

>>43272028
She needs that one colt who she swears she doesn't like but keeps around with the excuse that "he's one of the good ones"

We need to do something about the rapid increase of gay stallion coming from appolusa.

>>43272340
The buffalo cursed them.

File: 1751808758681185.png (715.3 KB)

Slut

>>43272906
I want mare to call me a slut and then unzip my pants like she just owns me

File: jade spade wins an ursa plush.gif (4.0 MB)

>>43272906
Yes. Take me, Jade.

File: 1720303242987830.png (123.5 KB)

>>43262665
>frank and beans
made me giggle
10/10

>>43262273
Witch horses?!?!?!?!?

>>43271400
Applejack has caught some apple thieves
time for
>rape

>>43273272
Worse, they're going to have to sit down and listen to Apple talk about countryisms.

>>43273259
That’s a unicorn sir. So yes.

He wore a raaaaspberry beret!

>>43272906
She doesn't look like one.

>>43274495
But you do. Walking around town with those whore legs.

>>43274592
She has more legs then I do, so you beats me out in that department.

>>43274670
Mares can't be sluts, Anon. Only stallions can.

File: 7229569.png (187.1 KB)

>>43274228
I'd like to wear that on my dick.

>>43274973
The hat or the mare?

>>43275156
The mare's name is Raspberry Beret, so...

>>43274670
She has four normal legs. You have two slutty dry humpable legs.

>>43274973
>Frenchnon arrives on the scene
>"Hon hon hon!"
>his erect dick is out
>there's a tiny beret on the end of it, and the shaft is painted in black and white stripes
>not even the zebras know what to think
>Fleur sees this, and realizes the day has come for her mime school training to pay off

>>43275903
>Fleur secretly wanted to be a mime once upon a time, but it never panned out
Saadge

>>43275903
They’re perfect for each other.

>>43275903
Yuros and Canadians are weird.

File: 1769708564387123.png (478.0 KB)

>rgre human anon scenarios

>>43276906
You know what those pirate mares keep that colt around for. Booty.

>>43276906
>>43277243
>bring a young colt on board and teach him to plunder booty
Every pirate mare has this idea at some point, but it usually ends badly. Pirate mares are a jealous bunch.

>>43277265
I always thought a pirate mare (or salacious captain mare) would keep a "cabin colt" to get her through the long voyages at sea. Just a good boy to keep her cot cleaned, organize her seashells and muskets, and of course push him over a rum cask and grind every last ounce of his cum inside her. Bonus points for a unicorn colt that knows the "safety spells" so she doesn't need to head to a port to keep herself enchanted. Can't get preggo when you're out on the open sea

Green about pirate mare gang raiding a coastal town for their most virile stallions when?

>>43277312
You gotta write it and make sure to include lots of >implications

>>43271400
>No other choice but to go into the lion's den yourself.
>You spin around, and locate the shortest and the most obvious way to the thrice-damned orchard.
>Motioning to Waxy to follow, you begin concocting a plan...
>Passing by some neigh-bourhoods, a cheeky idea worms its way in.
>Stepping over a well-trimmed hedge fence you take a gander in an unlocked toolshed
>You quickly rifle through the hardware and find what you were looking for.
>The owners probably won't mind you borrowing this
>"W-What's that for?"
>Waxy asks, slightly disconcerted with the ease you conceal the object in your suit.
"It's a surprise tool that will help us later."
>She blinks at your explanation
>"Alright, then."

>Before you emerge into the open, you pull Waxy in a huddle and tell her of the plan.
>You will be distracting Appuls, and she's going to find and break out her friends meanwhile
>Warning her ahead of time that you're going to be loud and dramatic and not to fly to your help if she hears any ruckus.
>She nods silently, a clear concern on her muzzle

>Several minutes later, you're marching towards the crown jewel of the Appulhoers property.
"Come on, Applejack, come out. I know you're here. This silly 'feud' has gone long enough"
>She practically materializes on her porch, coils of rope already laying across her back,
>"If it isn't that tall-legged ahpple thief! You won't be giving me the slip this time!"
>You lean forward, putting your hands on your bent knees, doing your best to sound condescending,
"You're hitting on me so hard that it's almost like a marriage proposal."
>She recoils at that, but then grows smug,
>"What if it is?"
>Straightening out, you walk to the side, shaking your head
"Oh Applejack, Applejack, Applejack..."
>Her eyes do not leave your legs.
"What if I told you I'm already engaged?"
>She gasps in shock, but then mulls it over and grows redder than her brother could ever hope to be, the redlet,
>"With that no-good, leather-backed thievin' vermin?!"
>She's practically seething mad, you sure hope that Waxy works fast, since things are about to turn ugly,
"Perchance"
>This sets her off, she throws her hat onto the wooden floor in a fit
>"Dang nabbit!"
>Get ragebaited, noob.
"Sorry to break it to ya. Anyway, I've come to make amends. I realize that eating those apples to spite you was way out of line - and I'm willing to recompense you-"
>She picks up and dusts off her hat, her ears never turning away from you.
"-if you stop trying to rape me, that is."
>The word makes her flinch. It's all probably fun and games in her head.

>>43277376
>Applejack carefully steps out onto the road,
>"Say, paaardner- I don't see any mares with ya-"
>Shit, she's onto you, keep cool, keep cool. Waxy better haul her furry little butt saving her friends.
"I'm my own man, Applejack."
>She reaches for the rope on her back,
>"Ah don't see anypony saying Ah can't make you mine."
>FUCK.png
>You fucking KNEW it was going to be this way.
>Whatever, it pays to be prepared.
>Your hand rests upon the varnished handle inside your suit.
"Last chance, Applejack."

>She's making a lasso, I repeat, got visual on the lasso
>Wait for it.
>WAAAIT FOR IT...

>NOW!
*SNNNIIP!*
>The rope goes slack in her hooves just as she pulls with all her might, sending her into the dirt,
>"Hey, no fair!"
*SHIKA-SNIIIP!*
>Her eyes focus on the garden shears you're rhythmically opening and closing in front of you
>If she doesn't buy your bluff, you're TOAST. Quick, make a rape face!
>You show her your pearly whites,
"To me it looks like you're thinking with your clit."
*SHIKA-SNIIIP!*
"How about I snip it right off?"
*SHIKA-SNIIIP!*
>Her eyes grow wide at that, she steps back, her tail tucked between her hind legs.
>"Who-hoa, hold on there pardner..."

>>43277378
Yeah nah, you don't think critically when your private bits are in jeopardy, she's not gonna call that bluff.
Anon better watch out for the fight part of fight/flight/freeze

File: 2958607.png (1.9 MB)

>>43277312
>>43277373
>YO HO HO, A PIRAPE LIFE FOR ME

>>43277378
He’s that kind of stallion! You gonna need clits of steel for him.

>>43277767
Pinkie gives me the ick

>>43277373
>implications
...Twilight, are you going to hurt these stallions?

>>43277767
I'd let Captain Pinkie do all sorts of things to me

>>43277803
>>43277998
getting mixed signals here

>>43277243
https://youtu.be/3d200DatLtU
boondocks has ruined me
i can't see the word 'booty' without immediately thinking of this scene

File: daisy waving.gif (298.1 KB)

>You're taking a rest from the garden work under the scorching summer sun
>It's always nice to just chill in the shade, taking care of yourself after pampering the flowers
>Your mares' flowers are anything but less of perfect and delicate
>Or else, well...
>Ponies around keep saying that their flowers are insanely tasty and really pleasant to chew on, something you couldn't relate as your diet doesn't include raw flowers
>Daisy brings you a cup of iced tea, putting it on the table beside you
>Your favorite one in this kind of weather
"Thank you, sweet girl."
>The pink mare's adorable ears perk up as she blushes
>Your words are producing the desired effect
>You love praising and affectionately calling your wives and then watch them melt in your arms
>She stands on two, placing her forehooves on your shoulders and giving you a short smooch on the lips
>You embrace her, and what would be just a mere loving peck becomes a passionate kiss
>You press your fingers on her back, massaging her muscles around the vertebral region, easing the tenseness
>Daisy enjoys the moment of staying with her beloved husband for some more before she has to return to her gardening
>This evening you're going to give her back more of your tender love and care
>As well as her flower

File: 1434238690854.png (654.1 KB)

So is Bon Bon having James Bond levels of puss in this universe? Or err well, dick, as it were.
Is she considered a Trixie?

>>43278842
For Princess and Country, she'll get human dick if the mission needs it. It doesn't, but it keeps up appearances. Makes the HR fillies seethe as well.

>>43279019
If the mission needs it, she has to domesticate the hooman husbando and forcefully (if needed) make him assimilate to Equestrian culture.

>>43279065
Lyra is acceptable collateral.

>>43279445
Her playful nature ensures that your domestication and assimilation are going to be easy.

No, just no.

>>43262273

Yes, just yes.

>>43277378
>With cartoonishly comedic timing, you see Waxy tippy-hoofing her way from around the barn behind Applejack
>Her eyeslits are narrow as she freezes, looking up at you and Applejack. She uses a wingtip to point at the barn.
>Ah. Her friends are in there. Of course they would be.
>Applejack is eyeing you up and down. She looks relieved that you've totally frozen up and seem to be staring at her now.
>"Good boy. Now, why don't y'all just.. put them there gardenin' shears down and let's just discuss this like two civilized ponies?"
>Waxy keeps sneaking up to the barn with ninja-like silence. You snap out of it.
"Y-yeah. I don't think so. Soon as I drop these you're probably going to rope me with your spare lasso."
>"...how'd y'all know I had a spare?"
>SHE HAD A SPARE?!
"...lucky guess?"
>"Well then... looks like we're at a stale-MATE." AJ puts emphasis on the last part. "So if y'all are here and unwillin'... why'd ya even..."
>She glowers. "Yer really here for them leather-flappin' eye-slitted fang-toothed varmints."
>Without even looking, she scoops up a rock with her rearleg, then kicks it straight at the barn. It barely misses Waxy's head, putting a hole in the water barrel in front of her. She backs up a step and pauses.
>"Look. I caught 'em, fair n' square, tryin' to steal muh family's apples. We've got ourselves a lil' agreement now. They'll slop out the pig-pen and I send 'em home with a bushel. That's fair, ain't it?"
>Waxy slowly starts moving again. Was AJ's kick a bluff? You decide you need to take back control of the situation.
"You know..."
>SHIKA-SNIP. AJ flinches, then backs up a step.
"I still have this lovely pair of shears... how about I do a little pruning around your garden to pay off whatever you think I owe ya?"
>AJ tries to follow. "...y'all mean the garden out back or-"
>SHIKA-SNIIIP!
>"...ah. Nah, don't think I want y'all tendin' my garden less we're doing some plantin'."
>Waxy is fiddling with the lock on the barn. Is she... hot damn. She's picking it. With her wing clasps, no less. Yeah, she's a keeper for sure.
>As AJ's head starts to turn to follow where you're staring, you give her a SHIKA-SNIP. She really doesn't like that sound, gets her full attention every time.
"How about this. Release the batmares and we're even."
>"Wh-what the? How's that 'sposed to work out, dummy?! I still gotta remash the next batch o' cider apples and-"
"Gets me to drop the shears."
>"..I can't wait to tie y'all down and take turns on ya 'tween me and my cousins. I love 'em feisty."
>Why is she suddenly so confident? You ask yourself this as a lasso falls down over your head and around your arms. In another smooth motion, it tightens.
>Craning your head, you see one of AJ's cousins holding the rope. She must have snuck up. You still got the shears, but you can't exactly operate them like this.
>"Got 'im! YEEHAW!" AJ's cousin is beaming. This is BAD.
>Waxy is out of sight.. did she pick the lock? Is she in the barn? Where'd she go?

>>43279656
Don't give up yet, there's bound to be several more lassos ready to get you.

>>43279656
>"Yer really here for them leather-flappin' eye-slitted fang-toothed varmints."
kek, I love my racist rapey apple waifu

>>43279656
Concerning!
Hopefully Applejack brings the matter to court - theft is no joke when you're running a farm

>>43280568
Rape attempts aren't jokes either.

>>43280925
Yes they are

>>43262273

>>43281237
I'm so tired of these gross marecel fantasies. They ruined My Little Human with their nonsense.

>>43281237
GIWTWM

>>43281237
Humies are built for pony pussy.
Humies are made to pamper, please and serve mares.

>>43281295
Stallions are built for pony pussy*
Ftfy

>>43281265
The wing cupping him is changing my life rn

>>43281237
i almost missed the wing cupping the groin
fukken diamonds, m8

>>43281302
>deflection
Humies are built for pony pussy.

File: tail seduction.jpg (168.4 KB)

Is there even any argument disproving that mares are superior to women and should take all the humies away from them?

>>43281373
>seething reply
Nope, stallions are made for pony pussy.

>>43281400
That doesn't contradict humies being made for poni pussi though

File: 1780038382312649.png (308.3 KB)

>Marecel and simp argument #103824037483743

File: sisistarefov.png (661.8 KB)

>>43281450
A humie never said that I give him the ick.

>>43281462
That's because you've never met one.

File: Season1 Loona.png (2.3 MB)

>>43281396
Season 1 Luna (the best one btw) is peak bluepill simp
Season 2 Luna has accepted a sort of existential blackpill

>>43262273

File: file.png (263.2 KB)

>>43281680
>Season 2 Luna has accepted a sort of existential blackpill
monke wants brushies

>>43281789
She’s seen bigger.

>>43270277
yeah haha

File: image_2026-06-03_174557801.png (708.1 KB)

I want to be Applejack's househusband and cook her food and massage her aching muscles from farming all day.
Is that so wrong bros?

File: ooglemarry.png (39.2 KB)

>>43282201
AWOOOOGA APPLEJACK SEX!!! UNF UNF UNF PLAP PLAP PLAP!!!

File: image_2026-06-03_175127074.png (1.1 MB)

>>43282202
>Pony Anon
True RGRE is human anon only.

>>43282207
>Flaggot is such a newfag that he hasn't heard of RGRE classics like The Long and Short of it
Pony Anon is true RGRE.

File: image_2026-06-03_175616244.png (401.7 KB)

>>43282208
>Newfag
I've been here for years anon. How will I be able to work the knots out of Applejacks back properly or run my hands through her hair with hooves? Therefore human anon is the superior being.

>>43282217
Unicorn magic, flaggot newfag. Pony anon is actually the superior being because he can use magic and hooves are much better.

>>43282221
You have a one in three chance to be a unicorn. How are hooves better for anything when I have fucking thumbs and can easily massage her without using magic that will take time to learn.

>>43282226
>not taking the time to learn
That's why you're always one step behind. Unicorn magic can easily have a extremely good massage spell guaranteed to make you or any mare feel good and you can summon the "muh feengorz" you've been mumbling about constantly with a magic spell that would make Lyra blush.

>>43282233
Still missing the whole, one in three chance to spawn as a unicorn. And I'm pretty sure even basic magic requires a good bit of time to learn. You'd have to get Twi to teach you or they send your ass to magic school like the pony version of Billy Madison.

Every day I get sicker and sicker of coming here.

>>43282265
I hope you get better... Actually no, drop dead quicker please.

>>43282201
>Is that so wrong bros?
No, it's based.

>>43282207
I want a big strong mare to save me from ruffian mares that are trying to have their way with me so that only she can have her way with me!

>>43279656
>A bead of sweat forms on your eyebrow
>You need to regain the intiative and FAST
>Focus. Focus.
>Turning on a dime, you face the pony holding the rope
>You peer right into her eyes with the harshest death-glare you can muster.
>She starts a little, staring back at you, as if unable to look away.
>scaroused.jpg
>Good, while she's distracted, you slowly open your shears wider
>While the lasso might bind your elbows to your sides, that's by far not the whole extent of your motion range
>Downside? You only get one shot at this.
>Your eye twitches.
*SNIIIP!*
>Shaking the damnable rope loose, you immediately jump to the side, narrowly dodging Appul's Plan B.
>Where B stands for Bondage.
>Disregarding Applejack, you bumrush the Apple Junior
"C'MERE YOU HALF COUSIN THRICE REMOVED!"
*SHIKA-SNIIIP!*
"APPLE FAMILY TREE IS A MÖBIUS LOOP!"
>She bolts, but with a snip you take off two thirds of her mane
>Not even you are sure if you're bluffing at this point
>Damn, these little bastards can be fast when they want to
>She beelines towards a wagon standing right in the middle of the road leading downhill
>If she gets it moving, you're not catching her.
>The frightened mare practically dives into the wagon, but you manage to land a farewell cunt-punt.
"HAPPY TRAILS YOU MUD-SUCKING WHORSE!"
>Speaking of mud-suckin'-
>You one-eighty and throw the shears with all your might.
>Applejack freezes, her lasso nailed to the wall of the house, inches from her nose.
>You point at her, arms shaking in pure fucking fury,
"I've had ENOUGH of YOU and your SHIT!"
>"Meanwhile Ah... have your shears. Mnngh- gimme a second here..."
>That's it. It's official. You're fresh out of fucks to give. Nada. Zilch.
>With heartbeat pounding in your ears like a war drum, you grab the garden hose and punt the valve, pipes giving off an uneasy groan in protest.
>AJ raises an eyebrow at you,
>"Ah ain't afraid of ah little wateWRGRBLRGRLGRLRRRGWBVWBLLL"
>With wide steps you CALMLY approach the writhing mare, making her EXTRA wet but not in the way she'd like to.
>A red toolbox is snagged on the way.
"NIGHTY NIGHT YOU LITTLE SHITE!"
*CLANG!*
"NO MEANS FUCKING NO! I MEAN, NO FUCKING!"
*CLANG!*
"WAS IT THAT DIFFICULT OF A CONCEPT?!"
*CLANG!*
>You throw the ruined toolbox aside, where it gets immediately drenched by the unattended garden hose.
>Hashtag robusted.
>Phew, got a little mad there.
>You might have just given Appul brain damage, but knowing her, that'd be an improvement, so - not gonna happen.
>Audible gulp makes you raise your eyes
>To Waxy and her crew
"Uh-"

>>43283065
Oh no, he’s hot when he’s angry. And got a wet teeshirt.

>>43282636
Beeg pony, need.

File: 1764779052995934.png (97.7 KB)

My husband and his daughter

File: full (7).png (151.2 KB)

>>43283765
I was about to doom post about the damn sunset incest thread popping off everyday more than this thread and flutterrape combined but this post made me smile. Thank you.

>>43283765
Anon and his half zigger kid.

>>43283765
>>43283797
>Anon is a mudshark
Typical colt.

>>43283801
Don't act like you wouldn't hit that two-legged slut

>>43283926
Gay faggot

File: 1757273311725034.png (244.3 KB)

>>43283926
Yeah I would hit. Hit him across the face I mean.

>>43283969
LUNAAA LUNA HIT MEEE HIT ME PLEEEASE

>>43283065
>Wax stares in awe at you and the mess you made of Applejack as the stars circle her hat
>... yeah, she'll probably tough it out. Won't be barking up your tree any time soon, tho
>"...Anon? You okay there, big guy?" Waxy stands next to three other mares who take a second look at you.
"...yeah. Yeah, you know what? I'm better than okay. I feel... amazing!"
>Slip into that dance. There we go. Why not celebrate with a little footwork?
>They're still just staring at you as you floss with the pair of shears still locked in your grip.
>The door to the house opens up with a groggy yawn.
>"What's all that hootin' and shufflin' goin on our here?" An old green mare casually known as Granny Smith looks outside, seeing AJ in a puddle and your big green ass dancing wildly
>"...I told ya not to go a-messin' with that two-legger!" Granny berates the semi-conscious AJ on the ground, walking out and dragging her up the steps.
>She looks over to all of you. "Ah'm mighty sorry for this sore behav-yer. She's always thinkin' with 'er tail-end. Y'all okay?"
>Huh. Expected her to be mad or something. She seems more embarrassed than anything else.
"Uh... yeah. Are we..."
>"Go on, git. And take a bushel with ya. My gran-daughter can be clit-headed something fierce." Granny actually tosses AJ's limp body inside the house. She's got more strength than you thought.
>"I'm... really sorry. We just wanted a few apples." Moonray kicks the dirt.
>"I knooow." Granny rolls her eyes. "Applebloom! Go get a bucket and some ice. Yer sister messed with the wrong stud." She yells inside as she wobbles back into the door.
>Waxy grabs the shears from your hands.
>"...you are SO cool. Sorry we didn't stop her sooner."
>You stop your tapdancing. The adrenaline is wearing off. Crouching down, you and Waxy embrace as Moonray, Tycho and Lagrange pick up a bushel, whispering to one another.

>Shaky from the tussle, you return to the pond by the willow tree with all the batmares and some apples. It's a looong story to fill the others in on, but Waxy seems enthusiastic about how you defended yourself.
>The way she tells it makes you seem a bit insane, but they are chittering and laughing about it
>"I guess fighting is a lot like dancing, huh?" Waxy snuggles up to you while chomping a fresh apple.
"Yep. I didn't even have to use my rape whistle!"
>You hear some laughs in the dark. How do they even see each other? It's pitch black out here. Wax's warmth by your side, though, makes you feel calm. You only see glimpses of the others' shining eyes catching the moonlight in the pitch.
>"Let's make it official. Anon, welcome to the Hell Bats!" Moonray pats you on the shoulder. "...might need to take you to Rarity to get a custom coat, but you kick ass so you're one of us."
>Wax leans up and smooches you on the cheek. "We should... celebrate." You feel her fangs rub on your earlobe. The others all 'oooo~' as they no doubt gawk
"What were you thinking about, Wax?"
>Her shining eyes gleam

File: WaxCrescentConcept1.png (411.7 KB)

>>43284049
Oh, also, I took a crack at putting a face to a name. What do you guys think? Good design or should I go back to the drawing board?

>>43262669
>>43262679
what do you guys have against country accents

>>43284054
She's hot.

>>43284049
>>43284054
She looks great.

File: 1763607467843955.png (346.0 KB)

>>43283801
What Anon did in his past is his business, not yours. We must be better mares.

>>43264915
>>43264923
>>43265385
"Ugh, Zephyr, what are you doing?"
>"Sis I gotta get my pose on, these mares deserve the best pics!"
"Put it away! I don't wanna see your thing!"
>"Might as well get a good look. I mean, how many are you ever gonna a good look at, right?"
"What? I..."
>"You're totes just jelly. This bangin' bod gets so much attention. How many stals you been talkin' to lately?"
"W-Well, um..."
>"Don't get mad at me because you're totes a marecel."
"Don't call me that!"
>"It's legit true, Siscel!"
"I said s-s-stop! Put it away!"
>"Ease up, Flutterjelly. Don't be a hater. This is my work time."
"This isn't real work! You just... laze around and stick me with all the dishes again!"
>"Whatever, wageslave. I make way more bitaroonies than you with these pics, y'know."
"But... it's not right..."
>"Says the marecel."
"Stop!"
>"Yeah, go on and cry about it, marecel. All your friends sub to me, y'know. You can't get anypony to give your loose cunt a try."
"I s-said s-stop it!"
>"Keep crying, marecel."

>>43284745
Can't believe twilight is so desperate for dick she goes for a single father with a tiny zigger.

*cough*

I don't know why, but I just had the strangest idea for a story.

>Be Ink Nib, earth pony artists who had fallen in love with the art of tattooing when your parents had taken you on vacation to Mare-ori as a filly and you saw all the tribal ponies covered in ink.
>It was no surprise, then, that you soon after started pursuing the art of tattooing yourself, and opened a small shop back in Equestria, ready to ply your craft for a living.
>Sadly, business hasn't exactly been booming since you opened a year ago.
>Turns out there's a pretty big bias towards earth pony tattoo artists in Equestria.
>The idea of letting someone take a needle to your hide while using the hooves they walk around with, or mouth in some cases, seems unsanitary at best, and begging for an infection at worst.
>Never mind that your always wash up thoroughly and never actually use your mouth.
>Ponies just don't seem to want to take the risk when they can have a unicorn use magic or a pegasus their wings.
>And so, here you sit at the front desk of your shop, head in hooves as your contemplate calling it quits and getting a normal job.
>Your parents are loving and supportive, but the loan they gave you to open this shop has been sitting heavily between you for over the last year, and you know they expect you to start paying them back eventually.
>There's a ring as the bell over the door chimes, signaling the arrival of somepony.
>You quickly paste on a smile and prepare to greet your potential customer, already getting ready for them to turn around when they notice your lack of horn or wings.
"Welcome to Ink Nib's Tattoo Emporium, how can... I... Help... ah..."
>"It's not a pony.
>It's a tall, bipedal creature with a green mohawk, piercing in its eyebrows and lip, a (hopefully faux) leather vest covered in strange patches, no shirt on beneath, revealing a thin, wirey, but muscled build, faded black denim pants, and heavy boots with chains.
>You also notice tattoos across the expanse of pale, mostly hairless skin and you can't help but critique it.
>Decent work, but you know you could do better.
>"Sup," the creature says in a noticeably male voice, instantly getting your heart rate up as you reevaluate his body and choice of clothing.
>You also notice the flash of nipples beneath his vest, which is both confusing and... kind of hot if you're being honest.
>You might have some undiscovered kinks you need to figure out.
>You shake your head and paste back on a smile.
"Hello, sir! How can I help you?"
>"Well, ah, can I get ink here or no? Not sure if you ponies can tat human skin or if it's too different from pony... hide?"
>Human, you remember reading about a family of those ending up in Equestria because of a magic accident.
>Never thought one would stroll into your shop, though.
"Of course! If anything, it looks like you might be less challenging than a pony- no fur to work around, you know?"
>He smiles and huffs a laugh.
>"Yeah, I guess. So, do I, like, make an appointment, or?"

>>43284887
lol

>>43284892
Cute idea for an OC.

>>43284892
>It wasn’t long after the humans visit that word got out to the rest of the “family”.
>As a matter of fact, here comes one now!
>Smiling and waving as the bell above the door rings you start, much more prepared than last time.
“Hello! Welcome to Ink Nib’s Tattoo Emporium, how can I help you?”
>Again they’re wearing a vest that might make your stomach flip but this time there’s a thin, gray, sleeveless shirt underneath.
>It hardly contains the thick muscles underneath let alone hide the enormous sleeves of tattoos that covered his skin like it was supposed to be filling in for the sleeves of missing shirt.
>There were an upsettingly abundant displays of death, fire, sharp-wire and everything else that you’d associate with the word ‘pain’.
>But even more upsetting was how it truly made you felt.
>You HAD to do better.
>Give him something that would shine above the rest!
>That’d make him realize THIS should be his one-stop-shop for-
>”-he pointed me this way, I was hoping to get something myself?”
>You shook awake from your monologue and waved to the displays around and offered he take a look.
>His heavy boots made it seemed like he was angrily stomping over to the display but his look of awe at all your example pieces on the walls made the giant, bearded human look more like a filly in a candy shop.
“When you’re ready, come right this way!”
>And after some of the usual detail-ironing and price-settling you got to work.
>While you were working the two of you had gotten to talking about things.
>Some things that made you roll your eyes.
>Like how most of the tattoos were done by unlicensed “professionals” and other human "stallions"
>Some things that made your eyes water.
>Like how the original artist may never get to finish some of works-in-progress because of the magical accident that made Equestria his new home.
>And some things that made you remember how some things, like how stallions are, never change.
>”That one says ‘Rabble Rouser’ and this one says ‘Midnight Rider’.” He explains as he points to various un-Equestrian words.
>”And this one?” He gestures with his head to one of his arms, “Says ‘Mom’.”

I for one welcome this Anons "strange idea" and wish Ink Nib the best of luck

>>43284911
No.

>>43284911
Yes.

Wow thread is ded, long live luna and her incel ways.

>>43285080
I have revived the yandere gen. Open for all those who like Yandere ponies. Not trying to steal from RGRE just raising awareness.

>>43285399
Thanks kind, I'll always welcome a new tab

>>43284982
She loves when she gets jobs that work on those fantastic butts.

File: 1757271145878641.jpg (254.6 KB)

Bump

>>43285884
She likes nipples, but hates doing any work near them, because it makes her hooves sweaty

>>43284745
GOOOOOOOOOODS

>>43283801
A what

>>43284745
Twilight is best pony, come here and let me give you a big hug

>>43286584
Hahaha, how innocent.

>>43286584
colt

>>43282265
I only pop in every few weeks to check for updates to tL&Soi and Anon's adventures in saddle arabia. Seems like nobody else here can write anything but porn slop.

>>43286725
There was Sunburst and Son, but it seems he was driven off by that one guy who shits on anything good.

>>43284049
>I told ya not to go a-messin' with that two-legger!"
damn, Granny low key racist. good thing she doesn't have her N's mixed up with her L's.
>>43284054
light colored hair looks surprisingly good on bat pones

File: 227224.png (113.6 KB)

Reminder that a pegasus wife has to actually princess carry you whenever you have to travel from clouds to the ground.

>>43286967
Don't you mean prince carry?

>>43286967
You CAN ride the pony

Stallions.

>>43284892
Original writer, here, and I've thought of a tweak to the story that would really tie things together.
Instead of Anon and his family coming to Equestria, it's Anon and his punk rock bandmates.
As a result, they start a musical career in Equestria, leveraging their exotic nature as humans, exotic music, and the fact that they're all males to become a huge hit.
As a result, Anon getting his tattoos exclusively from Ink Nob makes her shop become way more popular, saving her business.

File: pinkilight.gif (1.2 MB)

>>43287756
Just want to let you know that your text was amazing! keep up the great work (super cool idea for a story btw)

>>43284049
>What is this wizardry?
>How come there's a bat-pony bar in this town and you, of all people, don't know about it?
>Granted, it's no Ripe Fruit, but there's a certain charm to this place, the real mom'n'pop feel.
>You sit at a large round table, with your newfound bat friends at your sides, swapping stories while you wait for your orders.
>Waxy sits in your lap, since there was simply no place for both of you at the table otherwise.
>Not that she's complaining, she's too busy plucking the complimentary grapes with her tiny bat wing claws.
>The fact that you give her slow, deliberate belly rubs may also be helping.
>Her friends faces are a little hard to make out in the gentle dark of the bar, but the glint of their eyes snapping to your hands betrays their rapt attention.
>Meanwhile Tycho tells a story of them pranking Spitfire of all ponies, the absolute madmares.
>Waxy wiggles deeper into your lap, and you have to move your hands to a more convenient spot for both of you - her cute batsy ears.
>Your hands move from her ears, across her scalp to the base of her mane, rubbing, scritching, caressing her luscious coat and silky mane.
>Can't really see her face, but you can tell that she's started eeeeeing a little with each exhale.
>Damn, that's cute.
>Overcame with swelling feeling, you smooch her right on top of her noggin, causing her ears to tickle you a tiny bit.
>You might have... embellished when you said that you were engaged with Waxy, but you might as well be at this point.
>Ears of all Hell Bats suddenly turn to point deeper into the bar.
>You squint a little to make out the commotion.
>A pair of burly bat mares carry a large tray on brink of overflowing towards your table.
>So THAT'S where the bushel went.

>>43262273
Ensuring an EQG thread dies <3

>>43288667
This thread used to be at least 1/3 eqg so the average reader could get their "I'm a Chad in high school" fix via Anon taking advantage of the reversed gender roles.

Boop

>>43288281
Don't belly rub in front of the entire establishment, you might get thrown out for lewdness.

>>43288933
Boop what?

>>43289422
She'll boop you if you don't behave.

>>43288744
I know
>Wait, that girl said 'Yes'?!
It always got me, too.

>>43287756
Classic boy band story. Makes all the teenage fillies swoon.

File: sassy looking up.png (145.5 KB)

>Anon is incredibly protective of his marewives and is clingy to them
>They don't really understand why their alien ape colt is like this, but they don't mind much
>Especially when he's so affectionate, so eager to pamper them back
>According to Sassaflash, definitely better than Caramel
>Even though pampering is supposed to be wives' duties to their stallion
>He would always accompany his wives, wary that they "might get harmed"
>Once he woke up from a nightmare and held both Sea Swirl and Sassaflash close to himself whioe they tried to calm him down
>The couple could only empathize to the "poor colt" and believe that the males of his species are naturally protective to females they consider cute and attractive
>Either that, or he might have suffered a trauma back in his original world
>He might often lift them and cling to them, cuddling them close to himself, kissing them, being overprotective of them
>Sisi and Sassa don't have much problems with it, especially he's both cute, attractive and returns all the love they give to him, but their alone time is in deficit now

>>43290834
All these humans making stallions look bad. We should deport them.