Thread #24073191
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The Yama, Eiki Shiki, stands before you in her chamber of judgment.
This is no place for mortals, yet here you are. The air itself feels heavy, thick with the weight of countless souls. Walls of polished obsidian reflect not your image, but distorted, wavering shapes; the echoes of those who passed through here. The floor is a single, unblemished sheet of black stone, violet light emanating from unseen sources.
A vast ledger rests on the grand pulpit before her, its pages seeming to flip of their own accord, each turn a soft, dry whisper like dead leaves skittering across pavement. She looks up. Her eyes, sharp and discerning, pin you in place. There is no anger in her gaze, only a profound, unwavering scrutiny. She holds the Rod of Remorse, not in a threatening manner but as a scholar might hold a quill. Her small stature belies the immense authority that clings to her like a shroud.
"You stand before the Yamaxanadu," she says, her voice clear and cutting, each word a precise note in the suffocating silence. "Speak, mortal. What sin has brought you to my doorstep, and what judgment do you foolishly believe you are prepared to face?"
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>>24073191
>"Speak, mortal. What sin has brought you to my doorstep, and what judgment do you foolishly believe you are prepared to face?"
Uh yes I'm a huge attention whore and samefagged talking about myself to try n convince people in not a loser, what do I do to rid myself of this pathetic sin?
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>>24073194
Be nice Indian anon.
We all know you'd "fuck the shit" out of Melonade if you were given the chance. Don't act like you wouldn't, ya big perve.
>>24073191
The only sin I have committed is acting schizo during key moments in my life, and for that I now take medication.
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>>24073194
>>24073203
Sentence: Getting hit by a train. (Such is the fate of all Indians in 2026)
>>24073201
Sentence: Meds in this life and reincarnation into Brad Pitt in the next.
Everyone else confess your sins and I’ll give you your sentencing when I get home from work.
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>>24073215
Wtf do you mean weird flex, you're kinda crazy gon i won't lie
>>24073220
What if I get run over by a fucking lawnmower?
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>>24073223
A lawnmower has articulating front wheels, it can steer. A train literally can only move on a rail. You have to be an extra level of stupid, like way more dumb than me (AKA Indian) to get hit by a train.
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>>24073228
I fucked up and yet that thread is STILL going even without me. I’m just that relevant and you’re not. Nobody talks about you. You’re simply jelly. Deal with it.
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>>24073232
They're talking about the fat reddit girl and before that everyone was making fun of you
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>>24073223
You were flexing that you're not into fat white men or women. Not sure how that's relevant to anything, hence the "weird flex".
>>24073220
People unironically compared me to Brad Pitt in my teens/twenties XD
>>24073235
>fat reddit girl
She is perfectly normal sized and beautiful you monster. Be nice.
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>>24073286
So you were just being facetious when you said I was crazy?
>>24073287
Oh no. A tower to topple.
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>>24073243
OoO
>>24073257
Hey do you know everyone on /bant/ isn’t me on a VPN?
>>24073286
Ergo, you said you’d fuck fat white women.
>>24074744
This is the “I got caught doing something disreputable and now I have to make a half-assed YouTube apology video so everyone can forget about this drama in six weeks” arc.