>>21969768
>Even for simple recipes,
Like what?

>>21969768
she looks smelly

>>21969768
Is that Nora Fawn?

>>21969768
1 in 3 is a pretty good ratio

>>21969772
In the good way or the bad way?

>>21969768
>Is this normal, or am I brain damaged?
damaged.
cooking is instinctual and cannot be taught or learned.
you either got it or you don't.

>>21969803
You are utterly insufferable

>>21969770
Burritos

I managed to get BURRITOS wrong today

>>21969800
like she smells mostly good from shampoo and perfume if you're just passing by, but if you get really close or if you're in a confined space with her you notice there is something emanating from some stink pocket somewhere on her body.

>>21969768
>tasteless
just add SALT
>>21969817
wrapping burritos is annoying

>>21969768
Just fo it the French way and add butter, fond and spirits.

>>21969768
This is the worst place to ask. Look at the cook along threads. Nobody here knows how to cook.

>>21969817
Spotted the poor

>>21969768
>1 in 3 times it turns out completely tasteless slop. Is this normal, or am I brain damaged?
Brain damaged.
If it is tasteless you haven't added enough salt, seasonings, spices, acids, fats, or sugars.

What a 'simple' recipe you're really wanting to get right? One you've tried or not, most cooking isn't hard but if you don't have the fundamentals like pan temperatures or flavor combinations its impossible to get it right by dead reckoning.

>>21969768
>Is this normal?
NO!!! Give us a few examples of dishes you attempted in the past and failed at.

>>21969768
>I've been cooking for two years now,
Why did Gen X parents never teach Zoomers basic cooking? Chip on shoulder children of latchkey kids who never wanted their children to have to struggle with the difficulty of boiling an egg or putting tomatoes in a salad

>>21969768
He cute……

>>21969813
A person who has no instinct can learn, but someone with instinct learns a lot faster. If you have almost no instinct you just won't learn fast enough to see progress unless you continually take cooking lessons.

What recipe have you tried and failed with, and how did you fail?
>>21969790
I don't think so.

>>21969817
did you not season the meat? that's the only way you could fuck up a burrito.

>>21969768
are you using dogshit entry level cookware? You don't need high end equipment but you are more likely to fail with shit quality pots and pans.

You literally only need 1 good stainless steel pan

What are you fucking up in particular?

Burning food? Get a timer. Add more oil. Never go above medium high heat. (you literally never need high unless you are searing meat)

Undercook? get a probe thermometer

Under seasoned/tasteless? Add more salt than you think you need. Add more powdered spices, it's almost impossible to make a bad combination of spices.

Food too dry? add butter, cream, or olive oil

Food turns mushy? Don't add liquid.

>>21969790
>>21969906

tiktok slot. iluvmeww

>>21969817
listen, I've made many thousands of pizzas and i can still fuck up a pizza.

>>21969925
>You don't need high end equipment but you are more likely to fail with shit quality pots and pans.
A shitty mechanic, doctor, chef, carpenter, tradesman, etc blames their tools.

You literally don't need a stainless steel pan, timer, thermometer, or any special tools. You can grill on a fucking grocery cart and still make a good steak.

>>21969960
you fucking retard. if op is saying he's borderline retarded, better equipment would help if he's using dollar store quality nonstick pans.

All those additional tools I mentioned are meant to help cooklets dumbass

>>21969960
>A shitty mechanic, doctor, chef, carpenter, tradesman, etc blames their tools.
Retard take. I had so much shitty cooking ware when i was a student and it was just a pain in the ass. Cooking was so much easier when i got better pots.

>>21969969
>better equipment would help
No it fucking would not. A brand new cook isn't going to use a stainless pan correctly, every food he ever tries to cook in it will stick and it'll turn to ugly shit he doesn't want after spending $40 on a fucking pan. Walmart pans for $5 are fine for learning for a year. You're a complete fucking doofus if you think OP's problem is the pan itself.

>>21969971
Explain why cooking was bad because the pans were cheap. Flaking teflon into the food is understandable, but they don't do that on day 1, or day 300.

>>21969971
this, but don't go out and spend $600 on pots and pans, you can find most of what you need at goodwill. I bought a barely used LeCreuset for $50 last year

>>21969973
you must be poor. just kill yourself.

>>21969768
do you fallow recipes
like measure things set them aside
then fallow instructions

i can understand how people can fuck up improving shit but if you fallow instructions you should be able to get good
not great but good

>>21969768
depends on how you engage with it, and what your threshold for being good is. I've been cooking for nearly 15 years and it took me a couple years to be confident following recipes, and then only in the last 2 or 3 years would I say I've actually become a "good" cook in that I've achieved consistency, a higher degree of technique, and don't rely on recipes anymore. and I think I probably still have more thresholds to reach. I don't think you ever really stop learning and improving in the kitchen if you engage actively with it.

but yeah, I would say a 2/3 success rate at two years in actually isn't that bad. mistakes and failures are normal. it's how you internalize mistakes that matters. if you take them as a learning experience, that's how you make progress. also engage mentally with the cooking process, don't just follow recipes blindly, absorb lots of information, taste everything all the time, and challenge yourself.
think about things that might not be explicitly said in a recipe. if your results are tasteless, the likely culprit is your food just needs more salt (most recipes are underseasoned and beginners are afraid to salt as much as they need to). but there's other ways to build flavour too. caramelization, blooming spices, incorporating acidity. and lots of other stuff. recipes won't always mention things like this, if you want to take your cooking to the next level you need to engage with other sources of information.

>>21969925
>This post was brought to you by today's sponsor Made In®

>>21969978
You must be bad at cooking. Sucks to be you I guess. Go ahead and fall for some more marketing bullshit.

>>21969768
use more salt nigga

>>21969768
What do I need to cook to impress a qt like picrel

>>21970028
a spoon and a lighter

>>21970041
She's literally too perfect to have done that

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>>21969973
>Explain why cooking was bad because the pans were cheap
You have never cooked with pic related or similar stuff, don't you? It's like cooking with an enameled can.

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>>21969960
Made chicken in a 12 dollar toaster oven, was great.

>>21969768
OP - honestly get a cooks illustrated book, they are super pedantic and that's how I learned. Godspeed.

>>21970042
judging by the fact that she has a tattoo in a highly visible location, on average she's likely to have many many more tattoos underneath clothing or on other places on her body
by this measure, your post is not accurate

>>21970052
Unlike most anons I love tattoos however. And it doesn't mean she's done heroin or crack or whatever

>>21970048
Yes, I've used enameled cast iron before. Its very french and gay.

You're overlooking the point or intentionally misunderstanding it. THE FUCKING POT DOES NOT GOD DAMN MATTER WHEN COOKING ANYTHING. If you're so brainrotted that you think a cheap $4 aluminum pot cannot be used to make a great meal, you're a complete and utter dumbass. Yes, nice cookware is nicer to cook with. Yes, it can assist in getting the sear, the cook, the char, the mouthfeel correct. Nobody cares you're some fag in san diego that has a nice cookware set. It didn't make the meal. It barely mattered.

OP is trying to graduate from fast food and kraft EZmac and you're suggesting he get a really nice pan, really nice knife, and uhhh fuckin somehow that'll make his "tasteless slop" be somehow edible and better. You're a consumeristic slave that cannot recognize his own stupidity.

I cook with lecruset, I smoke brisket on my traeger, I use a $200 knife to slice tomatoes, I brew my coffee and tea with a Bodom french press. None of that shit is necessary to make a good meal. I bought and use them because they're nice and I know how to cook. OP isn't failing because he hasn't spent enough money on tools.

>>21970055
>And it doesn't mean she's done heroin or crack or whatever
At least benzos or antidepressants like all girls with stupid brightly colored hair and tattoos.

>>21970063
Doesn't mean that either but I agree it's more likely. I don't care though desu

>>21970060
>Yes, I've used enameled cast iron before. Its very french and gay.
That's not cast iron. It's some paper thin metal coveres in enamel. Good luck making a sauté in a shit pot like that if you're a beginner.

>>21969813
i'm sorry you weren't given.
it's not my fault and you shouldn't place your disdain on me for you not being gifted.

>>21970028
things that say they are meat but are not meat. corn ribs, cabbage steaks, mushroom carnitas.

>>21970126
J U S T
egg

this is the worst board on 4chan

>>21970140
true. you should go back to your better board as soon as possible.

>>21969768
Man I've been cooking since I was 11 and I still fuck up all the time. Fucked up a chicken and cream dish earlier today, overcooked it and over reduced the sauce, so instead of juicy chicken in cream sauce we got dry chicken in split and half burnt mess.

>>21970152
instead i should stay and you should leave

You may have to stop trying to learn by cooking recipes and instead get an actual textbook that would be used in a first-year culinary program's class. Something that would be used in an introductory class, like Cooking 101 or something. And then expand from there.

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>>21970060
>mouthfeel
mood

>>21970028
something that tastes good and seems like it would be ordered at a nice restaurant

>>21970126
All horrible stuff

>>21969803
>cooking is instinctual and cannot be taught or learned.
Not true
Although you do have a palate or you don't

>>21970182
Use crème fraîche instead of regular cream as it's aleady thick by itself and doesn't need to be reduced. Also after frying the chicken breasts they just have to cook for a few minutes in sauce to be done.

>>21970879
Everyone is a man to you, my gay friend. I expect that you even pay prostitutes to peg you.

>>21970879
men deserve to be loved

>>21970375
Thats the irony. I'm glad you saw it.

>>21969768
Buy, rent or pirate COOK BOOKS if you don't have family recipes to lean on.
Searching the web for recipes only nets you stuff that assumes you know all of the methods it mentions. Like quickly spraying fresh boiled spaghetti with cold water to remove starch that makes it stick (no you don't overdo it so it gets cold).

I've seen too many people fail basic shit like stir frying because they do it on low heat (it got burnt once on high heat so they stopped that) so it more or less boils in liquids instead of chuffling it around often on high heat to get an even sear on all sides.

if youre a cooklet - forever

>>21971326
You're the one who likes trannies and had your mind broken by them.

>>21970375
>>mouthfeel
Where does the shitty hate even come from? Even my greatgrandmother used that word.

>>21970126
I truly believe this would impress someone like blue hair up there. That's hysterical, good call

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>>21970241
>>21970152
You should both stay.
But you >>21970140 should stop complaining because it's just a different kind of shitting up the board.
Provide more of the content you want to see, lazy bitch

>>21971219
i have never seen an online recipe that didnt specify what level of heat to cook something on or to run cooked noodles under cold water if the recipe needs it.

>>21971219
>Searching the web for recipes only nets you stuff that assumes you know all of the methods it mentions.
Same for cook books. If you take old ones like le guide culinaire it also assumes you know all the stuff and French terms. The recipes are so minimalistic that you only can fuck them up as a complete beginner.

>>21969768
If you genuinely just focus on the basics and get them down, a couple months and you should be completely consistent and only screw up like 1 in 20 and that's going to be due to being tired or something.
33%, so if you're cooking fr each meal of the day you're screwing up once a day? Or just like dinners?
As a basic, try working with only salt and pepper and making stuff taste good, literally no other seasoning, just the basic S&P, for instance.
>Preheat oven to 425 degrees F or 220C
>Chicken thighs, seasoned with salt and pepper to taste
(you just cook enough chicken and you kinda get used to the "right" amount by how it looks or how a pinch of salt feels i your hand, use good salt and use the same kind, don't be using some shitty iodized salt)
>In a hot pan, sear the skin until golden brown, be sure to not burn it, just pay attention.
>Chop onyun, nothing fancy just split in half and chop roughly evenly cross ring (so you get matchsticks basically as opposed to half rings)
>Remove chicken once skin is golden brown
>Throw in onyun slivers, add a pinch of salt and toss
>Once translucent (not caramelized) put chicken on top
>transfer to oven, cook for 30-35 minutes
>while it's cooking, set a pot of water to boil
>chop 2 medium potatoes of your liking into cubes about an inch or so
>boil potatoes for about 10-15ish minutes, or until a fork passes through them easily, drain water
>mash potatoes with a couple tablespoons of butter, add salt and pepper to taste
>Once chicken is cooked, remove the chicken from the pan, leave the onyuns
>add tablespoon of butter and sprinkle in a tablespoon of flour, cook on stovetop for about a minute on medium heat
>once browned, add a splash of white vinegar and a splash of water to deglaze the pan while stirring with a wooden spoon to create a quick gravy
>drizzle sauce and onyuns over potatoes and chicken
>enjoy

This recipe is foolproof, it teaches you to learn to season to taste with the most basic seasoning

>>21970028
Like that other anon said, girls like her are probably into dope judging by her looks. Cook her up some fentanyl and preferably have a vagina.

>>21971713
cont'
once you learn to season properly with salt and pepper you will never have "bland" food again, if you don't use the proper amount of salt, it doesn't matter what seasoning or ingredients you use, it will be lacking.
And you have so season everything, notice when I said add the onyuns (test onions soy onions soy) you also add a pinch of salt, if you were to add tomatoes as well, you'd salt the tomatoes and so on and so forth, everything gets salt, not just the star of the dish.
Check if the stock you use has salt,or if the butter you're using is unsalted and so on and so forth, also take note that something may be high in sodium and therefore salty, like anchovies, which need no salt at all, so if you're making a classic anchovy fettucini, you don't salt anything and use unsalted butter.

But salt is the base, it is what everything is built upon.

>>21971359
you should also leave

>>21969768
I want to lick her

>>21972531
is this food related? i am not sure

>>21971713
thanks dude

there's 3 big concepts, each is individual but outcome will be impacted all 3
1 is what goes together, base tastes.
2 is actual cooking, like not burning stuff, getting crust so on
3 is seasoning how much salt, pepper, garlic

id start by looking at what was wrong and why. it can be simple, like over under cooked, no salt, too much salt, or it can be a combination of all 3 were just a bit off so i didnt come out great.

use recipes until you get a good feel. ive been cooking my whole like and still measure stuff for things like pancakes, it is very rare you can eyeball the correct amount to make something come out just right.

>>21969993
>a couple years to be confident following recipes
What the fuck, anon. It's just instructions which you follow just as is. Why would you need to learn how to follow them?

>>21969768
define good.

to me good is when you can make something without using a recipe. we aren't talking about making the exact same thing every time I mean just take what you know about cooking and use that to make a pizza, or lasagana, or tacos, or whatever and it will turn out good to really good.

so in my case about 30 years of non professional cooking.

>>21969803
>cooking is instinctual and cannot be taught or learned.
completely wrong

>>21969993
what the hell is this nonsense.

I started cooking when I was 8. my first item was scrambled eggs. but we did not make scrambled eggs like most people it was more than just eggs what had been scrambled.

from there I learned more because my mother had a tendency to burn everything, did not season food and hated pepper.

I watched her make cakes and things like that and helped her. then I learned from my dad how to make steak, pan gravy, and enchiladas (no we are not mexican or black).

basically I learned to cook because I did not like how other people made food.

I was following recipes at the age of 10 so I don't know how you would have trouble or need "confidence" to follow one.

if you want to do something and are motivated you can do it.

>>21971348
And this is somehow a mark of quality?

>>21972841
>if you want to do something and are motivated you can do it
never said otherwise.
learning to cook at a young age from a family member is probably the single best way to learn how to cook, but that's an increasingly rare thing in this world. a lot of people don't bother teaching their kids anything in the kitchen. so they reach adulthood knowing nothing. that's a totally different playing field than somebody who was cooking with their mom since they were a kid. I don't think that following recipes is difficult, but it can be intimidating in that context, and when I say I was "confident" with it I mean moreso my ability to actually turn out a good result from a recipe. cause just following the steps in a recipe isn't guaranteed to make something that's good. it will more than likely be just fine, but that's the bare minimum. making something that is actually good and you can be proud of takes a little reading between the lines, some familiarity with kitchen equipment and ingredients, and so on, it's more than just the ability to follow the most base instructions.

You don't have to be good, you just have to make stuff you or others like. Once you can do that, you're successful and you "can cook". Also half of the secret of cooking is using enough salt/sugar, caramelising things, searing things properly. it's not that hard. oh and use MSG

>>21973230
Yes. Old ladies were always right when it came to cooking.

>>21969817
how did you fuck them up

>>21969768
>You fool! You posted a picture more interesting than your own post!
I wish I saved the pic for that.

>I've been cooking for two years now, but I'm still mostly a cooklet. Even for simple recipes, 1 in 3 times it turns out completely tasteless slop.
Uhh, well, we're all at different stages of our journey. 2 years isn't like decades of professional experience, for example. With that said, I gotta be honest, cooking isn't hard. Maybe if you're poor, lack the tools, lack the means of obtaining resources and information, yeah wtv, you got lots of excuses and cooking is the last of your issues.

But for a normal person, I feel 2 years is waay too long to be making slop - IF, you define slop as like, absolute trash. It's pretty damn hard to make something impalatable because adjusting is like the main job of your tongue when you cook.

My guess is, maybe you didn't learn properly? Like, do you know how to make chicken soup? Do you know how to make pasta? Do you know how to saute/pan fry? Do you know how to salt properly, to adjust flavours? I literally learned this in a few weeks after I started living alone cause I made all the food I ate. I played around with a variety of common ingredients, made mistakes, learned about my preferences, etc.

1/3 is a really, really bad rate. Are you doing enough research when doing something new? I'm guessing you're just winging it, but maybe you haven't learned to wing it properly?

>>21973697
Great post, I took me a few years to be able to consistently wing stuff and make my own recipes/adjustments. I made a lot of semi edible slop when experimenting early in my journey. But I remember like the first week (day?) after getting a fridge and stove in my first appartment, I looked up some recipe for a shrimp tagliatelle with amaretto sauce and I followed the recipe to a T and it was fucking awesome. OP should start with following recipes exactly as written and not going for overly ambitious dishes and he should be ok.

cooking is 75% heat control and 20% knife skills. the rest is just following a fuckin recipe

>>21973816
>heat control
YUP, I currently have an electric stove and I fucking hate not being able to make shit like a soufflé omelette any longer. Making fried rice is also a pain, obviously.

>>21973816
and 5% ...? love?

>>21969818
based sniffer
I wonder if you know the stale dorito female scent?

>>21969772
GOOD

>>21970060
>THE FUCKING POT DOES NOT GOD DAMN MATTER WHEN COOKING ANYTHING
You are so confidently wrong. Enameled cast iron is the best possible option for thick cuts of meat or eggs because it's almost impossible to get them stuck to it. Thermal capacity of cast iron is also important for getting a good sear/char.
>If you're so brainrotted that you think a cheap $4 aluminum pot cannot be used to make a great meal
It would change the amount of effort involved, and if you use the wrong cookware type for a certain category of meal prep you have a harder time with cleanup afterwards. For instance you should never prepare acidic dishes or sauces in copper pots because it will leech into them and give a metallic aftertaste. Especially if those food items require long cooking/simmering times.

You undercut your own argument anyways.
OP will eventually need to learn about the tradeoffs and benefits of different styles of cookware.
>None of that shit is necessary to make a good meal.
It helps improve the experience of cooking. Does he WANT to improve? Does he WANT to learn more? Does he WANT more techniques, skill, and knowledge?

>>21976687
>For instance you should never prepare acidic dishes or sauces in copper pots
Unlined copper is just deco or used in pâtisserie anyways.

>>21976687
>Enameled cast iron is the best possible option for thick cuts of meat or eggs because it's almost impossible to get them stuck to it.
Brand new cooklet and you're suggesting he spend $140 on an enameled cast iron pan to cook a steak or egg. Also, he's new to cooking and astronomically unlikely to be using unlined copper pots. Did you think before typing that shit out or just wanted to appear to know a lot about cooking with these reddit facts?

You're retarded.

He should be starting out with simple foolproof recipes. 1 skillet. Casserole. Baked whatever. Beginners bread. Scrambled eggs in a non stick pan. On what fucking planet do you start a cooklet with searing a steak in a LeCruset?

>>21970862
Anyone can learn to recognize flavours, anyone can learn to recognize notes. Saying you have "perfect palate" or "perfect pitch" is something women and faggots do.

>>21969768
I think it's learning the bigger picture of basic processes behind several dishes. Learn how to saute. You'll understand how much to cook each ingredient in the pan. You'll better understand the flavors and over or under cooked. Learn how long to bake foods. Improve your plating. Try to activate flavors rather than under develop or boil them completely away.

The fast track to >>21972822 is poverty and experimentation. One should be a little pragmatic in the kitchen, but a willingness to really fuck up is important to let yourself grow. Commercial shops will follow a recipe to the grain, but if you're an artist then you'll work with the canvas.