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>>64847991

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>>64847986

>>64848220
oh i just noticed that the OP is just a more expansive version of this, i'm a retard pls no bulli.

>>64848234
>profilgate

>>64848223All good, that was the in progress one I posted while it was still going

>>64847986
Man I kept checking in on that thread so many times throughout the past month. Was nice to be a part of it

>>64852274
was there ever a follow up?

>>64852316
no

>>64852328
damn

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This fucking tard

Real long shot but does anyone have a really old greentext about immigrants trying to get to Australia and being intercepted by the HMS fuck off we're full and being attacked by boomerangs and vegimite? I must have wrote it 10+ years ago and I've been trying to find it ever since

>>64847996
>somebody saved my greentext
fuckin' noice

>>64852399
How the fuck is that guy alive?

>>64854194
>32 grand for a broken drone
If something is 32 grand then it should at least work when anon throws it off a cliff

>>64852403
I love this so much

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>>64852274
reminds me, there is a gunshop here that would get surplus from off base, and in one tote there was a sealed canteen that had ducttape on it with 'Jesus' sharpied on it. They put it up for sale for 10k, with a label that said 'drink to see jesus'

anyone have the destructive device m82 upper home defense greentext? coulda sworn i had saved it years ago but i cant find it

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>>64855233

>>64855233
Why save garbage like >>64855358 ?

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>>64855399
>"Watch your mouth son, this 'garbage' is your history, it should remind you chuds what we're postin' to protect!"
>"Hey, if the normies wanna wipe out this particular part of my history, that's fine by me..."
>"You ask them reeeal nice next time you see them, anon- I'm sure they'll be happy to oblige,"

>>64855940
It's a fucking bullshit story made up by some no guns idiot.
At least the one about a guy using his dad's Lahti against some home invaders seemed truthful.

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Does anyone have the one with anon that used baseball bat in self defense?

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Does anyone have the Blood Cork greentext?

>>64856167
reminds me of a saying in my langauge:
"amiral qui chie du haut du mat", pronounced "amiral kishiduoduma", and means "admiral who shits atop [the] mast".

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>>64856207
Bah I know the one you're talking about but I dont have it

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>>64856207
I've got it, here.

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>>64847986

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When in doubt, gas yourself.

>>64860927
I was going to post this, fuck you

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>>64860939
You can always post one of the deer/horsefuckers

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>>64860939

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>>64861156
I also have the /b/tard should it be relevant

>>64861186
0/10 would not recommend

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>>64852005
Have we ever gotten a Tokwalker follow-up?

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>>64847986
Sometimes I wonder about this Anon, I wonder how he is doing

>>64861671
I just wanna know what made him think THAT was the way to make friends

>>64864187
He had a ‘Tism too strong to comprehend (to his detriment)

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I've yet to see anyone top this for worst job in the military

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>>64867926
Oh god I forgot this greentext. What a horrifying thing to learn about

>>64853722
It might not be the right one but this is the only one I could find on the archives
https://desuarchive.org/k/thread/18895769/#18896258

Anyone have the story of the french anon fighting off a burglar with a gladius? Cuts off the guy's hands and the last line or so is "guess what the sentence for stealing in sharia law" is or something to that effect.

>>64860185
Based GONK

>>64864187
>>64867877
Not on the same scale as that anon, but for a time in high school, I wore this extremely ratty military jacket my Dad got at some thrift store in the 70s every day to school. It did not look cool at all. Even the biggest retards on this board wouldn't consider it to be cool milsurp. It was already ratty, and I wore until it fell apart to the point it was literally unbearable. But I thought it was cool then. Everyone is the stupidest version of themselves in middle school and high school, and people do shit that they would never do as an adult.

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>>64869886
you are not wrong... I held on to my art folders from middle and highschool- just so I have ammunition to cringe myself back into the norm. I still remember being the kid most voted to be a school shooter, while being completely oblivious to that fact til much later

Did anyone ever make a collage about the guy who fucked up his beretta by spray painting it?

Does anyone have the post when a guy posted his mosin nagant after "shooting it so fast, and so long" the handguard caught on fire and was charred? This was years ago it was posted so I doubt it.

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>>64852399
>Going forward I won't do anything like this without ear protection for sure
My sides left orbit at this point

>>64852399
>it's not the first time I do stuff like this
bro

>>64870988
Imagine attacking the pussian trench and half their dudes just lay about missing fingers with blown nuggets by their sides

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Not a greentext but fuck it, there are other non-greentexts here and the only time I've posted this was on /tg/ when discussing Alderaan getting blown up. I wonder how the other Botan anon's doing.

Anon have the greentext about anon building a improvised electric fence to keep bears away from his bees?

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>>64882714
Fingers' crossed he didn't burn his bees.

>>64882714
>>64882758
holy shit forgot all about this guy
didn't he eventually kill the bear?

>>64879704
Post the one where a dude fucked his sister, because they thought they would be nuked anyway.

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>>64882845

>>64882894
Thank you, and thank God for nuclear incest tard.

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>>64882894
>average
>4.5 inch
Anon, I'm sorry. I really am.

>>64854476
Yay, one of my works!

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>>64856167

>>64867926
>>64868369
I must know, what the hell are blood mushrooms?
What particular species of fungus?

>>64883327
Anon there are things you don't want to know the answers to.

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I'll pull from the oldfag archive.
It's been so long, the captchas have changed so much. fucking ai

>>64885081
I love ones like this assuming they are true.

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>>64885088
Truth is stranger than fiction

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>>64885052

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bump

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probably my favorite greentext of all time

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>>64856169
All stories posted here are fiction only a fool would blah blah blah etc.

>>64856170
>internal marsupial pouch style stealth carriage bay
Lost.

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LIVE

>>64861671
>Two coats at the same time in the Aus summer
Fucking HELL. This past week I've been going shirtless because the humidity is making me sweat through anything I put on, and this fucking retard set himself up to survive a Siberian campaign.

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>>64899174
Good read, I need a single shot 40+ cal lead slinger rifle now

>>64903919
Welp, shotgun anon got the last laugh, trench warfare has been back in style for a while now.

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Absolute classic

>>64908914
>>64908915
>>64908922
>>64908925
I wish the best for this man. I hope he's finally been able to find peace.

There's a greentext screencap I've seen a while ago, must be years.
Has to do with some ship (I think a carrier? maybe enterprise?) struggling to get underway after half-assed repairs, and getting beached/stuck/flooded or something like that. Written from a perspective of anon who has some sort of tech or engineer.
It was like 2 greentext posts, not a huge picture.
Anyone got anything?

>>64903948
Yeah, but the whole "trench shotgun" thing was always a meme, it was never real.

Back in WWI, shotguns saw extremely limited use and they were mostly just used by dudes in the rear, for guarding prison camps, supply depots, and logistical points like train stations.
The US issued a less than a thousand of these things, and the ammo they supplied was just commercial paper-cased hunting ammo that turned to mush and jammed the fuck out of the guns during actual trench warfare.
The US did eventually supply some brass cased water-proof shells for these guns, but the war was more or less over by the time they arrived, so they saw even less action in WWI than the BAR.

All the hype about WWI "trench shotguns" came from completely fictitious tabloid articles (at least one of which was written by the yellow journalist that pulled the whole USMC "devil dog" narrative out of his ass"). And from the krauts claiming that soft lead buckshot violated the Hague convention's ban on expanding bullets. As for the latter, the Krauts didn't make such claims because the shotguns were effective (they weren't), it was just a bullshit PR-move in response to the entente's bullshit war crime accusations against the central powers, such as the whole sawback bayonet "controversy", myths about crucified POWs, and the English-speak press lying about the Germans being the first power to deploy banned chemical weapons.

>>64908914
Funny how in my cunt if you ever even dipped your toe in foreign military or police, you'll never get accepted into our forces since counterintelligence guys will flip their shit.

But in USA ex-child soldier with A1 english shows up and police goes:
>hol up sir here in your CV it says you've been killing niggers since 11 years old?
>fucking OUTSTANDING
>quick give this man a gun and badge we have a quota of brown teenagers to eliminate

>>64915177
You seem jealous that we know how to hire experts in their field.

>>64885099
>>64908914
>>64908915
>>64908922
>>64908925
Prisons are full of so much retarded bullshit, kek