>>42799031
Considered it but I’d rather have a hot wife I have sex with than spend my entire life trying and failing to become a woman I’m attracted to. No mtfs body pass 100%

>>42799248
this is what I was thinking myself. The AGP fantasy isn't just to be a woman, it's to be a hot woman, and the chances of passing for me are 100 to 1. I'm short and skinny with a man face and a big head.

>>42799265
If you find yourself fantasizing about becoming the type of woman you jerk off to, you probably just need to get laid. Most trans people’s inspiration is not so explicitly sexual unless they’re like a true schizo AGP incel

I was on HRT for just a couple months last spring. I went off them after I was laid off but I was already pretty apprehensive about taking them. Tbqh there's been several times I've come close to trooning but I always walk away feeling that it's not really worth it.

>>42799031

Yes I transitioned for a Fetish. I had AGP, Forcefem, MEF, sissification and humiliation/degredation fetish and also interested in BDSM as a masochist.

>>42799248

This does not work. I had multiple multi year relationships with cis women, one of which was on track to become marriage. The initial euphoria of "having sex with a hot woman" wears off in 1-3 months tops. You begin to struggle with avoidance and feeling like somethings not right, you begin to feel that your partner wants sex too much and is too demanding, and slowly the relationship gets sour and shitty. The homoerotic and AGP fantasies return, porn use returns, and eventually it gets incredibly painful to the point of imagining being fucked by a man while you're having sex, going to bed and waking up witb fantasies about having sex as a woman, etc. Invariably it ends in coming out to the partner. Passing or age is irrelevant for this.

>>42799265

"I'm not being my true self because I feel i'm too ugly" is not a sustainable identity for a lifetime.

These "path of least resistance" copes are a product of being young and naive and assuming it will go away just through force of will. They're very irrational when you consider that all the adults who transition also tried and wanted to repress but couldn't.

>>42799281

>schizo agp incel

False that's just misandry, transphobia, knee jerk sex negativity etc.

Wanting to become the woman you jack off to is very common regardless of the stigma against being AGP. For most AGPs this is the only way they can masturbate. The idea of having sex with a woman as a man is mortifying to them no matter how much they try to force themselves to want it. They can only see it as worship, envy, emulation, and self insertion.

And this applies to all types of cucks, betas, porcelain, sissies, and anyone caging, plapping or orgasm denying, etc. The vast majority of them are feeling this way due to repressed homosexuality/bisexuality or repressed transsexuality.

>>42799393


*porncels not porcelain

>>42799393
do you still consider yourself cisgender?

>>42799031
im a cis agp I take estrogen but haven’t “transitioned” per se
>>42799281
I tried that and got limp dick it was very embarrassing

>>42799499
I'm worried I'll get limp dick because my sexual attraction has moved from straight, to trans, to sissy, to feminization and nothing else does it anymore.

>>42799393
I’m not attracted to men so this doesn’t apply. Also this sounds absolutely horrifying. By becoming an imitation woman I am precluding myself from sexuality involving beautiful women. I will not be a beautiful woman, it would just be easier to imagine myself as one

>>42799393
if you transitioned for all those fetishes how are you not horny all the time lol

>>42799499
Most guys get performance anxiety. That’s why you make sure your first time is with someone you trust

>>42799531
idk it was with my gf at the time I think I trusted her. I don’t think ive ever had sex without going at least slightly limp. could be anxiety or could be that it kinda grosses me out. Im sure I could’ve tried to fix it but was too embarrassing instead I just got obsessed with agp stuff

>>42799583
So you never think about sex with women? What kind of porn do you use to get off?

>>42799031
>HAVE you transitioned because of your fetish?
Yep. Would never admit it in public but this was literally the only reason. So what if I'm 'fake' (according to some on this board)? It was still a good idea.
>>42799393
VERY relatable. Did you get srs too?
>>42799529
nta
Enough estrogen and srs changed things. I'm still horny above cisf levels (and I'm glad for it) but it's entirely different from before.
Luckily, I did find a guy who is sex positive and open minded enough to play into this and is otherwise an amazing partner.
Lowkey I believe those of us who troon for the fetish are much more likely to make it work because the motivation to put in the effort is much higher (as sex is a "primordial energy" so to speak).

>>42799393
>"I'm not being my true self because I feel i'm too ugly" is not a sustainable identity for a lifetime.
I'm 39 and balding, I'd need considerable FFS, multiple hair transplants, and enough hair to obscure the massive size of my skull

>>42799594
well now that im on estrogen I don’t think about sex and don’t watch porn, before I used to watch tranny porn but overall I was never a very sexual person. after I broke up with that one girl I started questioning myself and never tried to date again which I kinda regret bc I definitely took my agp fetish too far, maybe I just needed a better woman idk

>>42799659
Tbh sounds like normal crossdressing which is incredibly benign compared to the racist and misogynistic sissy gooner shit half this board is secretly (sometimes openly) addicted to. Just do whatever feels comfortable

>>42799651
>multiple hair transplants
nta but this may indeed be wrong.
Depending on how lucky you are, you'd be surprised how much regrowth can be achieved by simply being on hrt.

OP here. I think a compounding factor is my schizoid personality disorder. So I don't have a sex drive (towards other people IRL) because of that, and the autogynephilia has totally replaced it.

>>42799688
I'm 5'7" and have the frame and hands the size of a woman's, so it's not entirely over. Just got a boner thinking of that

>>42799689
also I've been told by multiple women that my face is like a 9-.9.5 male's face so my narcissism won't let me ruin that

>>42799687
yea I don’t have any weird fetishes beyond crossdressing/agp, but that’s why I think I would have never gone down this path of taking estrogen if I had just tried harder to be a straight male and always have a gf. I think im like >>42799689, I think I have avpd so the difficulty with being social caused me to obsess over agp bc it’s something you can do alone

>>42799702
take your pills, Alice
like, seriously, agp is never going away. even if you think you're never going to pass, some estrogen usually does help at least with managing the intensity of it (thus leaving room for the rest of your life outside of sex).
heck, with DiY now there's guys who do hrtwink routine. some for agp reasons, some for esthetics but none of them 'socially transition' and some of them don't even tell anyone that they take girlpills.

>>42799738
I wish I grew up in a pre-Internet era, I delved into trans porn at 12 and never stopped

>>42799031
self
woman
love

these three contain secret of salvation. secret of bliss. secret of everything. secret of that there are no secrets. know self. why you made this question? do you feel longing? fapping ruins it. so lowly. so unpresent. otheewise its all encompasing.

I cope by messaging trans girls on Reddit and help them transition. That way I can live vicariously through them without having to transition myself.

>>42799827
based chaser repper

>>42799393
Speak for yourself faggot
>>42799031
I trooned but then detrooned when I realized that even if I could pass, I probably couldn't date or have a happy life. So I detrooned to be normal and able to have a cis wife.

>>42800156
does she know about your troon life? how much have you told her? (do you have tits)

>>42799496
I'm a post SRS, post FFS, cishet man on HRT who goes by she/her pronouns and a female name and crossdresses 100% of the time. Basically what was once a fetish just fused with my personality completely. You could say i'm a behaviorally feminized cishet male conditioned to present as female through positive reenforcement.

>>42799519

Originally I liked women and was more or less completely straight. Years of repression and increasing intensity of the AGP/forcefem fantasy gradually wore me down and make me like men more. First as degredation, then meta attraction, than MEF, then "cock addiction," and eventually i just liked men. My sexual attraction to women waned slowly and eventually all but disappeared.

>>42799529

I do have a very high sex drive but i'm not horny all the time. I got relief from having an overly high sex drive as a male by transitioning.

>>42799615

Yes and SRS basically eliminated my MEF and my residual attraction to cis women, like there is no feeling of shame there any more. It's kind of awkward because im used to feeling MEF arousal toward cis women my whole life but now my arousal just feels like a woman's and it isnt shameful. Soo I am not as quirky as I used to be i guess.

>>42800248
>I'm a post SRS, post FFS, cishet man on HRT who goes by she/her pronouns and a female name and crossdresses 100% of the time
this is what I would expect my life to be if I committed full time. But my entire personality is naturally very masculine, almost no feminine traits at all. Did you have to socially transition and force yourself to act more feminine in order to pass?

>>42800248
I’ve never tried putting anything in my ass because I’m worried it will open these exact floodgates. The idea of losing my attraction to women and being with men instead sounds terrifying

>>42800279
What is MEF arousal to women? Would you ever masturbate looking at women? What would you think about then?

>>42800279
How did you not feel ashamed 24/7 presenting as a woman if you found the idea of being a woman shameful

>>42800248
>>42800279
I understand FFS to make you cuter... but why lose your dick? castration fetish?

>>42799651

Okay I see. Personally I think anyone who is like well past 30 is pretty justified in repping but I know some John 39s who transitioned and look alright but one kf then wears a wig.

>>42799659

Sex negativity + repression. There's nothing wrong with watching porn and having sex and you should do that. No better woman would have fixed you and there's nothing wrong with being AGP.

>>42799687

Sex negativity + transphobia + its giving bitterhon. There's nothing wrong with having fetishes and they dont indicate someone's political beliefs. So yeah sissy, raceplay, misogyny, etc are all fine. Cis women have these fetishes and cis women also goon (although they NEVER feel guilty about it lol)

>>42799688

More likely HT cant fix what they have and they need a wig. HT cant fix total baldness because the donor hair isnt as dense as native hair

>>42800336
the thing about me at 39 is that, because of my schizoid personality disorder, I have extremely few lines on my cheeks, eyes, or forehead (rarely smiling or laughing.) So I regularly get mistaken for being in my 20s all the time, so despite my actual age it doesn't feel too late from a looks perspective.

>>42799714

Having an attractive man face makes you more attractive as a woman especially psot FFS. Positive canthal tilt projecting chin, strong jaw, high cheekbones are attractive in women. Historically a high arched nose and high forehead were also attractive in women although currently only China still thinks this.

>>42799689

Unless you're diagnosed as schizoid I doubt you are. Autogynephilia is normal female sexuality you are repressing and dysphoric which is why you're having these problems and being socially withdrawn.

>>42800336
Women are not into sissy or raceplay shit lmao. Just go on one of those online communities and see how many cis women are there

>>42799731

You don't have a personality disorder. You live in a society that doesnt want to let you present as female and get fucked by men. Also, as for "i'm only attracted to women," no you're not hon.

>>42800156

I lived the life of a successful male repressor fucking women. Unless you've literally done that and made it to 30 your opinion is discarded-- you're just a repressing detransitioner doing it due to self hate and conservative beliefs.

>>42800369
Lmao you can’t tell me who I’m attracted to. I know if I saw you on the street I would notice your male skeleton. Imagining a man typing thus while gooning to sissy hypno just makes this all more sad and weird

why is Dr. Nona telling us what we do and don't have? I've talked to many mental health professionals and have displayed every symptom of the disorder since adolescence, when it typically manifests.

>>42800287

Malebrain/fembrain is what is called "pure rherotic" by learned doctors.

If you act feminine they say you're misogynistic and imitating what you think is a woman.

If you act masculine they say that you're acting in accordance with your biological sex snd proving you're not a female.

Sex differentiation is a conservative obsession because their ideology rests on forcible exploitation of women. They will commit literally any logical fallacy in a desperate attempt to maintain the system they are a slave to. Just go look up "gender and the semiotics of fascism" on youtube.

>>42800389
They need to constantly justify to themselves that there decision is justified by encouraging others to do the same

>>42800369
>I lived the life of a successful male repressor fucking women. Unless you've literally done that and made it to 30 your opinion is discarded
Idk, I've never been a chad but the times when I've had my life most in order, when I was working full time, had a solid friend group, was taking care of myself, etc. was also when my AGP was barely noticeable and mostly faded into the back of my mind. It tends to flare up when I'm feeling most depressed, out of work, alone, etc.

>>42800303

This is something that could fill ten threads, and I have in the past.

But to summarize it, investing the female form with symbolic power to remove my masculinity, by causing me to feel and behave as a woman(attracted to men) this is the basis for all the babecocks, sissy captions, sissy affirmations, and those weird videos where a fully woman suggestively smokes a cigarette and it keeps fade transitiong to gay pown. Its an entire pantheon of transsexual eroticism that comes in many varieties but generally the best response is to transition. And live as a woman and interpret yourself through the female gender.

File: image.png (161.2 KB)

161.2 KB PNG

How do you know if you’re a trutrans gayden or just a yaoi addicted femcel?

>>42800330

The shame was very intense at first but wore off gradually and slowly I came to love presenting as a woman and being sexy.

Women sometimes also feel self conscious about wearing revealing clothes, makeup, and high heels. Women also experience forced feminization, sexual shame, and even emasculation in a different (afab) context. And dont get me started talking about comp het.

>>42800428
You should start one. I’m curious.

>>42800446
How did you stick with it if the shame was so intense? Isn’t that an indication to stop?

>>42800333

Yes it was a castration fetish, plus desire to have no erections, no ability to compete with men by possessing my own phallus, and also, latently, the desire to be rid of the feeling of impurity caused by residual male desire, i.e. that shameful twitch in my cock i would sometimes get when I saw a hot woman.

SRS itself works pretty well these days, masturbation and sex works fine. It's just a different configuration of a pp that allows you to have a flat crotch in yoga pants.

>>42800393
You are the most reddit person of all time. There’s not even a video with that title. Should we watch philosophytube explain why being trans is totally sick bro

>>42800367

Girl... just stop. I have like fucked cis women as a woman i have a gooning group chat with like 20 cis women cis women have memory disgusting fetishes then men and trannies could ever dream of. They love pissing, they love incest, they love BBC, many of them love forcefem, or even just gay porn. I have had deep conversations with cis leabian women about how hot sexual strength difference is. Misogyny, LGD, rape, are all kinks that cis women have. You literally know nothing about this. I have years and years of chats and photo and video uploads to prove what I say in addition to my own copious lived experience.

Are there as many cis women in these groups as men? No. But thats mainly because cis women can usually have sex freely if they want and for cis men it's often harder..

>>42800386

Post ur discord then lmao so I can prove i pass with a timestamp. I've seen so much transbian coping by now i don't even care anymore: You and every other AGP repper deep down in ur DNA wants to suck cock and you're just afraid and coping. like, only 2% of cis women are lesbians. Thats just how estrogen works. Almost every girl thinks "boys are icky" before getting sexual experience.

It's sad and weird that you have to be liek you're a sissy boomerhonnnnn every single time to maintain his depressing delusional world where you have to repress lol

>>42800527
>I have years and years of chats and photo and video uploads to prove what I say in addition to my own copious lived experience.
So post some

>>42800527
I don’t believe you lmao. Cis women do not date transbians unless they are like one in a million passing. You are the only person I’ve ever heard claim anything as absurd as 20 person cis woman gooning group chats that you’re apart of. Do you also have slumber parties with your girlfriends where you wear pink pajamas and beaid eachother’s hair?

>>42800400

I didnt make the thread lol.

>>42800389

But are you diagnosed with that shit by an actual doctor? And have you told said doctor about what you consider your "AGP fetish?"

>>42800564
I would like to talk on discord but i’m worried about account compromise

>>42800279
>SRS basically eliminated my MEF
How so? If anything, I get even hornier at the idea of having the boy fucked out of me. Not that I'm complaining. It is what I wanted, but I don't understand what you mean by "eliminated".
>and my residual attraction to cis women
Yes. But I count that as a benefit, desu.
It also helped that I socialize a lot with cisfs as one of the women and sometimes I have to stop them from talking and remind them that we're in public.
I sometimes stop and think how much of a basic straight woman I became. Weird and also awesome in a way.
>like there is no feeling of shame there any more
Yes <3
Since all women are AGP, there's no reason for me to be ashamed for being aroused at my transformed body.
>I am not as quirky as I used to be i guess
Idk, I think we're just quirky in a different way.
AGP/mef/whaterver surely manifests differently in us than cisfs.
Also, while in the bedroom I'm full sub, in society I'm pretty dominant as personality, not too different than pretrans. Except now it's quirky instead of normal but, ironically, it's more appreciated.
>>42800303
>Would you ever masturbate looking at women?
nta
post-srs solo male is the number one thing I enjoy. Followed by straight and post op trans porn.
Solo women or lesbian porn doesn't arouse me enough to want to shove my hand in my panties, let alone to want to grab the dildo or the vibrator. Lesbian porn arouses me just as much as masc-x-masc gay porn arouses the standard straight dude or maybe even less.
>>42800333
>but why lose your dick? castration fetish?
nta but you should look into what MEF means.
being fucked in the srussy is the endgame of mef. Or at least is for me and it seems for the nona you're asking too, given her other replies.
Losing my dick was the single best thing of the whole process. Everything else was/is less important, comparatively speaking.

>>42800612
Were you aroused by solo female porn before transition or before srs?

>>42800451

I can't anymore unfortunately, it drew too much attention.

>>42800456

I don't think so, personally? I view shame as indication that you're learning. I just kind of saw it as how you're ashamed when you suck at a language or at playing a fighting game when you start out. I guess i was fully comitted to what I was doing at the start, and just purposefully framed the shame positively so I could use it as fuel to push myself to pass better. In my view, the shame was a just punishment for my failed male self. As the Marines say, "pain is weakness leaving the body" in my mind, "shame is masculinity leaving the body"

>>42800527
>rape, are all kinks that cis women have
It's shocking how this board isn't aware that 2/3 of cisfs admit to having routine rape fantasies. It's not even something rare.

>>42800493

No i dont like watching trans content. The video i was referencing didnt have that title. And I am not a redditor im a oldfag and lifelong board dweller, which sucks because the board is fucking shit now and needs to be put out of its misery.

>>42800578

I'm not a transbiannnn and I don't date women but I fuck them once in a while? And each time it was another straight leaning bi woman.

>>42800571

Do you know how long it takes to screenshot, collate, and carefully redact that kind of material?

I don't care to because this idea that women are pure angels and only men experience sexuality is just self evidently dumb. Anyone whose like socialized with cis women will tell you the shit they get up to. Assuming you pass as female just walk into a woman's bathroom at the club and pick and listen for 5 seconds while peeing and it'll be crazy what u hear them saying lol.

>>42800612

I guess I meant my MEF doesn't really feel genuine, it now feels like being a cis fujoshi imagining i'm a man so that I can experience something "gay" it just doesnt resonate in the same way. More like a cheap fantasy than a signifigant act.

I used to be an extremely active poster/discusser in MEF threads but now it just seems like, a way for pre ops to get off and get psyched up about SRS.

Glad to hear it still pushes your buttons though :*

>>42800690
If I send a 30 min server invite link for a burner server, will you join and prove what you’re saying. You have the potential to fundamentally change my mentality

>>42800630
>Were you aroused by solo female porn before transition
Yes.
>or before srs
Kinda, but not that much. Especially after 1yr on hrt and orchi. Got orchi first because the waitlists for srs were long and was still unsure whether I should (stupid me wasted precious time on that).
Again, I personally see the "loss" of attraction to cis women as a good thing, at least in a male sense. Idk how to explain it. Let's put it this way: I could probably be aroused enough with a real cisf to eat her pussy and dildo together but would view it as non committal innocent fun. Falling in love with a cisf is no longer possible.

>>42800631
>I can't anymore unfortunately, it drew too much attention.
Are you the nona who did the thread on sexuality self-conversion guide? If yes, absolutely based. Very useful for a friend of mine rn.

>>42800778
This is honestly terrifying to me. How did you go from masturbating to pictures of attractive women to the sexuality of a straight woman

>>42800721
>it now feels like being a cis fujoshi imagining i'm a man so that I can experience something "gay" it just doesnt resonate in the same way. More like a cheap fantasy than a signifigant act.
desu i was expecting that, but for some reason I'm still euphoric about it 7yrs later. I guess in this aspect I am 'tru' since I'm not overall 'trutrans' lol.
>but now it just seems like, a way for pre ops to get off and get psyched up about SRS
Nothing bad about that, tho.
While clearly not for everyone, SRS is a good thing for those terminally agp who can otherwise make it socially.
But ig what you're saying. A thread like this would've made me horny pre-op. Now I'm meh about it. Actually being able to live female sexuality (even if imperfectly) is a wonder of science and tech. We should write books about it when we get older, lol.

>>42800763

I have a feeling like we already talked before perhaps, but sure go ahead I can definitely prove everything i said in here.

But I will only add individual account, a server anyone can join is too risky, for various reasons.

>>42800778

You could say I know that OP, and i'm familiar with the thread.

>>42800947
https://discord.gg/XWDb2drY

Here is friend link

>>42800778
was that the thread about a multi-step going gay then going trans and chipping away at their male self slowly but surely? that was full on goon material for me

>>42800786
>This is honestly terrifying to me
Then it's not for you. And that's fine. I don't judge anyone. We all want what we want.
>How did you go from masturbating to pictures of attractive women to the sexuality of a straight woman
A gradual and at least partially intentional process.
Stopped socializing with women for a while, intentionally changed my porn habits, learned to masturbate only with vibrators and dildos (very useful to this day) and did my best to only orgasm like that when alone. That was a year before starting hrt.
Briefly I got into a FWB arrangement with a fag friend (we're still friends today) so I learn how to be a better bottom. His forcefem enjoyment wasn't particularly strong but he indulged because I was fulfilling his fantasy of topping a "straight" guy.
Once hrt kicked in, I just let the pipeline run its course. While still clocky, avoiding women was even easier.
The whole process to zero attraction took about 8yrs or so. There were multiple points when I could quit, but every time I intentionally chose to carry on.
The absolute end of the process was srs but the actual end was slightly earlier when I met my current boyfriend. I fell in love for real. Just like I had fallen in love with my second gf a decade prior.

>>42799738
if I knew it stopped hair loss I may have done it already. it's just the boob development that's holding me back

>>42800184
no i didn't have a troon life. I just took hrt and then stopped. i dont have tits.

>>42800786

You start by being very attracted to women, way more so than the average man. You appreciate women's bodies more than any normal man does. So you masturbate a lot, you're so aroused by women that you actually prefer fully clothed subtly erotic pictures of women, because it delays your orgasm. You're fully aware that You're a slave to your lust for beautiful women and that You're a disgusting gooner who they would never even talk to. So you become a porncel amd fetishize your celibacy. You start to realize that beautiful women are emasculating you, by denying you sex. You start looking at betasafe porn and gooner captions and being more into feet and heels. Then, to make yourself more beta and serve women better by being more gay and feminized, you start looking at babecocks, or splicing in images of cocks with the women. This creates more erotic humiliation. Male bodies have no purity, so you're allowed to look at them. This progresses to full on gay porn in time. Every time you cum to cock and gay porn you are more emasculated and humiliated and the woman has more power of you. This is a sign you're becoming MEF. Soon these urges begin to leak out of the porn universe. You're having independant closed-eye fantasies about cocks and sex with men. The captions urge you to start acting gay around women, coming out to women, letting them know you're not a threat, not a sex option. Yes you might get PNC, try to purge, and try to go back, but each time you get aroused and orgasm to men, cocks and gay sex you slide a bit further.

People start figuring it out. You've been celibate for years, you're thin, weak and beta. You start experimenting with anal play and buy a cage. Maybe one night you confess something about your desires to a female friend. Once you tell a person you know in real life, the knowledge that you're "gay" starts spreading.

1/2

>>42800987
Yes, that one. Really useful for terminal agps who don't have a clue on how to go about it.
Wish I had such material when my gf left me.
>that was full on goon material for me
I believe you.
I just smiled tho. The thread appeared years after srs for me. Such material doesn't arouse me per se anymore.
>>42800947
>You could say I know that OP, and i'm familiar with the thread.
Fair enough and based.
I didn't have such material when I needed it. It's good that now it exists for the younger ones.

>>42801054

2/2

Eventually you're actively feminizing yourself, shaving legs, crossdressing, for the thrill. At a certain point all you're thinking about is either buying and starting HRT or going on Grindr and trying gay sex. You dont even want sex with women anymore, you just want female companionship to help feminize you. You want them to see you as not a threat. Maybe you'll have sex with a woman as woman one day post-transition, but you don't want that now while you're socially male.

I think once you take HRT or fuck your ass with a dildo or start caring your cock you pass the point of no return.

But even if you meet some girl who sates you, even if you have sex and feel cured, call up mom relieved and excislted, tell all the guys you finally had sex (and this happens to many of us) it only temporarily delays the process. The thiughts come back. The porn issue come back. It gets stronger and more gnawing and inconsistent.

If you actually have the AGP + Dysphoria combo, you either transition to cope, or you accept that it will be at rhe center of your cis male sex life. You can potentially be a cuck, a sissy, a serial cheater and maintain a relationship with a cis women, but that's gruelingly difficult and you'll be under constant pressure to transition anyway. Even when these straight relationships do happen they tend to dissolve on their own after a while, life as a bi trans woman is, in fact, easier than a repping cis male.

>>42800786

Oh also, the deep mortal terror you feel is maybe an indication that it's your destiny or something. Depending on how into forcefem you are.

>>42801015

Your story is so similar to mine it's crazy!! I think I was also 8 years from breaking up with my cis ex gf to getting SRS... 2 years as a pornsexual gaycel, 2 years as a "gay nonbinary feminine homosexual," and then 4 years transitioning. Isn't modern science fascinating? ^.^

>>42801121
it seems really common for even non-AGP transwomen to go frome straight guy to straight girl. like they just lose desire in women naturally as transition progresses

>>42801110
>you are now exactly like me and must follow in my exact footsteps because it's impossible for someone to have different life experiences or be different from me

>>42801147
no, don't you understand? because they experienced it, it's true for everyone else! we're just kidding ourselves by disagreeing with them.

>>42801110
Nah i think i probably find it exciting because i think its taboo and wouldn’t want to do it irl>>42801121

>>42800986

I tried joining but I was more than 30 minutes past the deadline it looks like. I am OP btw.

>>42801211
LMAO you're not OP I am. fucking faker

>>42801121
>Isn't modern science fascinating?
It absolutely is. Occasionally I do stop and think in awe just how crazy it is that I can live and feel as a straight woman, even if imperfectly. On one hand I wish I could see what will be possible in 2126. But otoh I'm grateful we're not in 1926 in the early stages of troon science.
Maybe in the future we'll be able to do srs by growing organs from stem cells. That would be great for pooners too.
I wish I could give my bf a child too. So there's still a long way to go.
>I think I was also 8 years from breaking up with my cis ex gf to getting SRS
The process took about 8 years but I did not start immediately after being left by my gf. I still tried to make the "straight/bi guy" work for another 2 years or so.
>4 years transitioning
You sprinted faster than me.
I actually postponed srs like a retard for several years. But at least I skipped the gaycel phase thanks to my friend. He didn't know at the time but he convinced me that eventually I will need srs and being no-op trans was simply not an option.
>>42801139
nta but I wish that were true.
Maybe it will be truer with the new generations of trannies now that gatekeeping is dead and the ideological BS is slowly dying as well.
Still, transbians are still the biggest chunk.
But, as the number of trannies grows, the sexualities should also slowly move towards the statistical norms in the general population.

>>42801211
https://discord.gg/Q6qREM37

Try again

>>42801147
>>42801159

Tell yourself what you want but people don't lurk tttt threads posting threads asking about how to cope with AGP and asking if anyone else transitioned for a fetish for advice on how to be a straight male and you and i and everyone else here knows that full well.

I'm not saying anyone should or should not do anything, i'm saying if anyone wants to forcibly troon themselves out and feminize themselves and break out of their repressor shell, it's possible.

Can it give you the wasted years back or restore your hair? No. But it can get you to commit the effort you need in order to pass as a lateshit.

>>42801233
trooning sucks.
>t. knower

>>42801233
I never asked for advice, I was curious if/how many other people have experienced what I have. I'm an AGP gooner that has no desire to be a woman outside masturbation. I was just curious how many people have taken it further than I, and there clearly are quite a few.

>>42801220

Okay we've got ourselves a troll in the dungeon. I am OP and i'll prove it by telling you OP's top 5 K idols:

Minnie - idle
Natty - KIOF
Yeji - ITZY
Giselle - AESPA
Lisa - Blackpink

Check the archives iykyk

>>42801230
if this person tells you they're OP they are full of shit btw. Idk why they are lying but whatever, maybe they have the same thoughts as I

>>42801230

It's still not letting my burner in, idk what to tell you, seems to be server is at capacity, or some other issue. I can't join on my main for various reasons I am way too identity compromised already. just post ur @

>>42800564
I knew you were lying lmao. This board is such larp

>>42801287
@hdxbdsbhbx

>>42801245

>>42801247

I mean, AGP is just a term of art. One person's disgusting fetishitic gooning addiction is another person's vanilla sexuality. Just a question of perspective. But the fact is, years of masturbation and celibacy wear you down, especially if you burn through a GF or three and realize it doesn't do what you thought. I'm not saying there aren't people who successfully detrans or stop being AGP but I don't think they'd characterize it the way a lot of the repressors and desisters around here do, which is usually in negative terms that mirrors conservative political discourse.

>>42801317

added

>>42801296

what are you so desperate about? post your @ too I'll talk to you if you want. I'm OP btw

>>42800336
>but I know some John 39s who transitioned and look alright but one of then wears a wig
aww thanks ^_−

>>42801415

I have to clarify something...

I am not OP.... I had a freudian slip because I've been posting in this thread and I was responding as if it was one of my old threads. call it a senior moment. I'm sorry.

The posts I did write are:... and fuck it won't let me link too many posts... most of the long ones with the weird spacing though.

I am sorry, and to OP who has said they're schizoid, I am extra sorry, didn't mean to make you feel you were being fucked with

>>42799651
>I'm 39 and balding, I'd need considerable FFS, multiple hair transplants, and enough hair to obscure the massive size of my skull
Well then fucking do it. The thoughts are just going to get more and more powerful. I can't imagine anything worse than lying on your deathbed going "shit... I wish I had made that major life choice I always wanted to make".

Just jump the fuck in with both feet. Enjoy the process, and enjoy the pleasure it brings. If you have to wear a wig, so be it. It just adds to the 'body swap' feeling of it all.

>>42799615
>Lowkey I believe those of us who troon for the fetish are much more likely to make it work because the motivation to put in the effort is much higher (as sex is a "primordial energy" so to speak).
I think for a major personal change of any kind to work you have to have emotional content. Like it can't just be an intellectual exercise, there has to be feeling behind it. Unfortunately for us a lot of that gets locked behind stigma. So it is revolutionary to take a step back and go "You know what, I am enjoying the fuck out of this, and that is perfectly okay". It unlocks so much power to get through the difficult parts. There has to be some aspect of this that brings you back day after day, that makes you want to get up when the process knocks you on your ass.

>>42801587
I would agree with you if I experienced the same thing as a friend I met on Reddit. He had such severe AGP that he was constantly comparing himself to women and imagining himself as a woman every moment of every day. I am just wanking it to the thought for about 30 minutes a few times a week. In my day-to-day I don't think about it at all. So I think I would deeply regret it and possibly develop reverse dysphoria, were I to transition.

>>42800721
>but now it just seems like, a way for pre ops to get off and get psyched up about SRS.
Why is this bad though? I made my mind up I was going to go through with it and scheduled a consult because of the MEF thread storm a few months ago. I had been waffling on for years because I was afraid I was doing it for the wrong reasons.

SRS is a one way trip, and the only was us preops can learn about it is from those that have made the journey. We are immersed in a culture that stigmatizes everything sexual. So when postops will only talk about the result in mechanical terms, or they will say things like "now my body and mind feel aligned" or "I finally feel at peace". If gives us nothing to evaluate our motivations against. And the default for 99.9% of people is going to be that if you want to get surgery because it turns you on, that is very much the wrong reason.

>>42801664
Are you wanking it so the feelings stop?

>>42801707
I don't have the thoughts independent from porn. I think nowadays I'm simple jerking off from boredom... I just go to feminization out of habit and probably could shift my porn habits if I cared to. But it gets me hard so w/e

File: 1_eeomGY2FwrjftFqMEXLycA.jpg (51.5 KB)

51.5 KB JPG

>>42801743
IMO you have two choices.

1. Do a trial run of an effective HRT dose and see how you feel
2. Intentionally jerk off to vanilla hetero porn, DO NOT self insert as the woman, and see how you feel about that

>>42801794
I'm curious - how would I feel any effects after months on it? And wouldn't I develop tits after months as well? I'm just wondering what the pre-boob era would look like.

>>42801821
I knew about about 4 weeks. The best way I can describe it is that I started feeling like a normal person for the first time in my life.

>>42801840
I'm just worried that the HRT would cancel out my horniness from AGP (the motivating factor in the first place)

>>42801897
Go read your post again, you are seriously telling me you rather risk being free of feeling like a schizo so you can stay horny?

>>42801928
no I mean I'd only transition from horniness because I've never felt dysphoria. If I was the type of hypersexual person who was horny 24/7 it would make more sense, but it's actually not that often.

File: IMG_5075.png (55 KB)

55 KB PNG

>>42801794

This post is super ironic considering the matrix can be viewed as a trans allegory/its directors and writers are lateshits.

>>42801971
I picked it for a reason

>>42801969
Then here is what I think you should do. Walk the fuck away from this board. Only goon to vanilla hetero porn. Always make sure you self insert as the man. Try to use it to straighten yourself out. Give it 3 months and evaluate.

If you go on to have a normal life, great. If you end up back at feminization kink, then you know what must be done.

>>42801694

Never said it was bad


The context of that is i was just explaining why my MEF felt dead post SRS

>>42802189
what's left to emasculate after SRS?

>>42801969

have you been into the idea of transforming into a girl and feminizing since childhood though? I mean i dont think of it as like transitioning to "escape" your sexuality i think it's more like transitioning to match your true sexuality. It's not really based on quantity. But when people say "transitioning for a fetish" they mean essentially transitioning for sexual health/relationship reasons.

>>42802086
this board is definitely brainwormy but Reddit is the real supply of all my tranny thoughts, mostly due to watching former faggots getting fucked into being women

>>42802249
If you are the anon I have been talking to. I am saying walk the fuck away away from this board and trannies if you genuinely do not want to transition. See if you can do it.

>>42802216

Well yeah, nothing. And also mentally like i just cant feel male anymore it's just like deleted and forgotten about. I cant feel inferior to women, I can't even feel castrated even though I have literally been castrated from a medical perspective.

Since SRS my sexual fantasies have been like shockingly normal heterosexual woman. Like not to be reddit or weird but I never ever watched full on porn in my life when I had a dick, only 2d hentai, erotica, more niche stuff. But now i can just watch hetero porn, self insert as the woman, in a non humiliation themed way, get off, and go on with life. I never feel emasculated. Also I dont feel like weird and scared of vaginas anymore because I have one. I also dont feel like a threat to women or an AGP pervert because I have my own wet hole between my legs.

So yeah all of the MEF stuff for me is kind of like, a fandom or VN series that I used to be really into but have just moved on from completely. I still think its cool, but i have no desire to re read it.

>>42802271
Yet here you are, in this thread...

>>42802286

Hey at least i didnt make the thread though. Even though at one point I literally thought i did.

But quitting internet/discord/social media addiction legitimately takes a while, its normal to have slip ups. Especially when you are changing decade long dysphoria driven habits.

>>42802260
ya I'll give it a go. was also an escape/relief from my schizo thoughts desu

>>42802241
No, it's been a more recent development, though I did jerk to trannies when I was younger. My sexual health/relationships were already fucked up by schizoidness but that's a whole 'nother topic

>>42799615
You're a pedophile.

>>42802697
Back in your containment board, chuddie

>>42801694
>I was afraid I was doing it for the wrong reasons
>We are immersed in a culture that stigmatizes everything sexual
Sadly, you are right. And it's not just troons who end up repressing because of this. Cisfags and even straggots with less common kinks end up not doing what they truly want because of what they think others will think and perceived "wrong reasons".
Heh, my cis bf struggled to admit to himself that there's nothing wrong with him cumming harder in a forcefem/mef context with me. And while we've been building an amazing life together, there is also nothing "wrong" that the foundation was/is lust based.
Heck, most successful relationships that last do in fact start like this.
>And the default for 99.9% of people is going to be that if you want to get surgery because it turns you on, that is very much the wrong reason
Fortunately, that percentage has lowered in the last decade. Still very high, but no longer near universal. The younger generations are more open to exploration than you give them credit.
Also, to be fair, sex wasn't the only reason I went through with it even though it was the main reason.
Logistics was also one. No longer tucking and freedom of movement (essential in my line of work) were also strong motivators.
Do keep in mind though: You don't owe anyone an explanation. Life's too short for that.
There's people getting srs at 60, lol. Heck, I know an hrtwink who's been "playing" the really feminine guy for 13 or 14yrs now. Seven years ago he was convinced srs is not for him. Now he's seriously considering it.
It's not for everyone and it's okay to have doubts. But it's also okay to get it just because you wanna.
>SRS is a one way trip
Yes. The way I worked around this concern is that if I regret it later on, it will still have been worth it.
Obviously, I still don't regret it, but if I will at 50 or w/e, it will still be better to be regretful Joanna50 than bitter resentful never-try John50.
t. >>42800612

>>42799031
>any felllow cis AGPers here?
Yes.
>have you ever been motivated to transition by your fetish? HAVE you transitioned because of your fetish?
No, I have no problem being a guy generally. I just like to put on lingerie and my chastity cage and get fucked sometimes. The contrast/secret is part of the fun.

>>42803909
Thanks for replying <3 I love your message of empowerment.
I've come to realize through the various MEF threads and some side convos that it isn't the primary motivation of my transition but it's still an important part, and maybe the prime drive behind my sexuality. Idk, im still exploring. Maybe I will get SRS and end up boringcore like the other anon.
Regardless, these threads have helped me figure out a lot about myself and that's invaluable. I was stuck in my transition and people like you sharing their perspective got me unstuck. Knowing you have had a good ending, somehow gives me confirmation that im on the right path for myself.

>>42799031
Be me
>animalistically attracted to some kinds of guys with unmistakable feeling of lust
androphilia?
>but also get indescribably horny hearing and reading what a guy thinks of my body and how's he's going to treat it and also hearing about the sex experiences in general *from pov of men I'm attracted to *
meta?

>>42805448
>Maybe I will get SRS and end up boringcore like the other anon
That's not even a bad outcome. I preferred that but I take the persistent euphoria too.
Good luck with the consult!
Get PPT if you can. It's superiour to standard PI and has fewer complications.
Secure emotional support for yourself for the first few months after the surgery. The recovery period is NOT fun. The fun starts afterwards.
Hugs.

>>42806019
>Get PPT if you can. It's superiour to standard PI and has fewer complications.
Is it true that PI can be converted into PPT? My insurance would only cover PI

>>42806019
I'm consulting with a surgeon that does PPT. The only debate is whether I also try to play the Suporn lottery.
I think I have some pretty good emotional support lined up :)

>>42805807
>>animalistically attracted to some kinds of guys with unmistakable feeling of lust
woman lust, lizard brain
>>but also get indescribably horny hearing and reading what a guy thinks of my body and how's he's going to treat it and also hearing about the sex experiences in general *from pov of men I'm attracted to *
woman lust, post-lizard brain edition

>>42800721
what discussion would you rather see in mef threads?

>>42806420
>Is it true that PI can be converted into PPT?
Yes, but it's not highly recommended.
PPT is performed as "corrective" if PI has been performed and complications arose.
What you're suggesting comes with excessive and largely needless pain. SRS is hard enough. Complicating it further intentionally doesn't sound wise.
>>42806451
>I'm consulting with a surgeon that does PPT. The only debate is whether I also try to play the Suporn lottery.
I eventually decided against the lottery. The recovery is giga hard even for those who win.
Meanwhile PPT has the best of both worlds: easier recovery (still hard, just not utter nightmarish), lower rate of complications, self lubrication and very high rate of getting the nerve endings right (but even the unlucky ones can still orgasm and have sex; just not orgasm from penetration alone).
Suporn has better cosmetic results but the difference is nowhere near as big as it was a decade or two ago.
Ofc, your body your choice. And it depends on your goals too. I prioritized functionality and speed of recovery (Suporn has a brutal recovery). Aesthetically it's better than I expected. Also, in time, you stop caring anyway.
>I think I have some pretty good emotional support lined up
Good! That's a lot more important than it seems before the surgery.

>>42799265
im really agp and i'd be fine be an average or slightly less than average woman. honestly just being a woman who could have semi normal relationships with someone who isn't just into the whole tranny thing, like youre stuck with if youre a tranny and wanna date men. you dont get to date normal men as a tranny.

>>42806573
>I eventually decided against the lottery. The recovery is giga hard even for those who win.
I've heard that. I have also seen some aesthetic results that are a bit underwhelming compared to what is coming out of the top US surgeons now.
I honestly don't have too much of an opinion of how it looks as long as it appears cis and is appealing.

Idk why but your focus on recovery is hitting different than all the other times I have read people point it out about Suporn. I'm late 30s (different anon than the 39 schizo), I have a serious career to get back to, maybe it's not bad to take an easier route to ensure I actually get through it with my lifestyle intact.

>That's a lot more important than it seems before the surgery.
What's the big challenge? Is it post op depression or just keeping up with the storm of self care demands? something else?

>>42800279
>Soo I am not as quirky as I used to be i guess.
I feel this so much, like since transitionning the whole sissy/humiliation kink doesn't do anything anymore for me and the years invested in it are just random embarrasing anecdotes that I can't tell anyone because no one would relate to cause it's just awkward. A lot of what I put my motivation into is just dead and I'm left being such a basic bitch it sucks. I also so feel so different to all the people with a normal sexuality that it's very isolating and hard deal with society's exceptaction. But I'm also ace so that might be that

>>42799031
im thinking about it, but just using estrogen gel to make it slowly
anyone got experience like this?

>>42807854
>I have a serious career to get back to
That wasn't a consideration for me because I was already quite valuable in the firm and I simply made the case for a longer unpaid absence.
For reference, I work in management for a big logistics corp. Me quitting may even make the news in specialized market publications lol.
Still, be prepared for some disruptions in your lifestyle for several months.
>I'm late 30s
Age is less important. Again, there are people getting srs in their 60s.
What matters more is your overall health and your tolerance to pain. Those make a much bigger difference than your biological age.
>post op depression
Maybe it sounds arrogant but post op depression is for those not fully convinced or who have several comorbid mental disorders.
There was no way I'd be depressed over getting what I wanted.
With that said, the pain in the first month is not fun at all. Not being able to walk for several weeks is not fun at all. Those things can really affect your mood, to put it mildly.
Then about 2 months in, I got really horny but still wasn't fully recovered physically. So it was a mixture of my brain rewiring to match the new "architecture" but not being able to test things. Sounds funny when I talk about it now but it wasn't funny at all in 2019.
>keeping up with the storm of self care demands
It's not that bad, especially if you have a partner.
I loosened up on the dilation regimen after 3 months and then slowly stopped doing it after 7 months or so. Saw no point in continuing given that I was having regular sex. But I'm crazy, don't follow my advice unless you're equally crazy and/or your body has very high healing capacities.
If you go with a top-tier surgeon, they will probably tell you this, that sillicone dilators are better than the rigid plastic ones usually provided in State hospitals or less prestigious clinics.
Still, get familiar with this - https://srsguide.com/dilating/dilators/

how do I get over the thought that a constructed vagina is just an open wound and will never be real. even if it turns me on

>>42808673
I've got stage one of FFS in two and a half weeks, it will be my first major surgery and I am looking at it as practice for SRS. I've injured myself a number of times bad enough to be laid up in bed for weeks so im hoping I will be able to deal with it okay.

Is most of the pain constant? Or is it when you move or touch the area? Or is it from dilating?

>Things are better with a partner
I am going to see if FFS helps with this. It feels like a chicken and egg situation for me. I don't really want to get a LTR until I have recovered from SRS and I can have sex normally. But it seems like you really need a partner to have a non hellacious recovery from SRS.

Thanks for the tip on silicone dilators and the link. And thanks again for all the guidance. I appreciate taking the time to write all this!!

>>42809697
learn how the surgery works instead of believing what some dude on your construction site said

>>42809861
I am going to get SRS but I have to retrain my brain to think of it as a vagina and something someone made.

>>42810534
>
*not* something someone made

>>42810534
nta
the brain is surprisingly adept at doing that mostly on its own. you'll have an easy time with this particular aspect.
After the initial recovery pain was over, it only took a few months until I got to routinely forgetting I even had srs. It all feels natural and as if it was always like that.

bump

File: tumblr_57dd70a2f4927b6d7254148b9c0f1398_9e411831_1280.jpg (115.1 KB)

115.1 KB JPG

>>42808631
>>42799499
isn't taking low dose hrt and living a secret dual life with cd'ing etc basically transition?
if not then what is it obsessive fixation? are there other justifications?
i did these things too and it was put very bluntly to me after a while that i was trooning in secret and i was otherwise unhappy or something then again if you don't take this indulgent idea or the ocd cope how would you justify it

>>42801587
ngl i always think i'm a dirty fetishist but sometimes looking at some of my stash gives me a renewed will to live after big time failing in life

>>42815249
>think i'm a dirty fetishist
There's nothing wrong with that. Just let go of the shame and enjoy what you truly like and want.

t. >>42799615

>>42799393
>The homoerotic and AGP fantasies return, porn use returns, and eventually it gets incredibly painful to the point of imagining being fucked by a man while you're having sex, going to bed and waking up witb fantasies about having sex as a woman, etc. Invariably it ends in coming out to the partner. Passing or age is irrelevant for this
Damn, am I really screwed?

>>42817165
>Damn, am I really screwed?
nta, but yes.
You do get a choice in how you're screwed tho.
You can be screwed in a pleasant way (by taking transition really seriously) or in a really bad way that ends badly basically always (i.e. repping).
Option #1 also comes with the possibility of building a functional life (unless you have other mental disorders too, in which case ymmv).
Option #2 comes with the possibility of being John50 and maybe breaking a family.
Regretfully, there is no option #3 as of yet.

t. >>42799615

>>42817611
I guess I am repping so far. What is the functional life like? It feels damned if you give in, damned if you don't.

>>42799031
>have you ever
No, but it's just one of dozens of fetishes I enjoy and it's never been stronger than my enjoyment of normal cishet sex.
>>42799393
nta but it just works unless you're secretly turbo-gay and need to bury it in trauma-induced TF porn use.
Then again unlike a lot of people posting about AGP I don't get off to degradation/humiliation or FF shit.

>>42817663
>don't get off to degradation/humiliation or FF shit.
What do you like then

>>42817626
>What is the functional life like?
I will soon get married to my bf. We're buying a house together. I work a normie job.
AGP/mef only consumes <5% of my brain and usually when I'm horny. And my guy fucks the boy out of me and it's all good. He's happy that he gets regular sex, I'm happy to be loved and fucked regularly and we've slowly slipped into very boring straight couple life.
I would've never achieved this as straight guy or if I hadn't intentionally destroyed my attraction to women.

>>42817672
Being worshiped and serviced the way I deserve. Hot, loving sex that leaves all parties concerned panting and well-fucked.
Maybe it's just a top or dom thing. I don't see myself as submissive regardless of gender.

>>42817611
option 3 is an heroing rn

>>42817663

Being penetrated by a man with his penis is inherently degrading and humiliating because you're exposing yourself to the risk of harm like disease or physical abuse or being impregnated for temporary sexual pleasure. This is why in old times they believed the ONLY morally correct sex for a woman was with her husband in wedlock for the purpose of procreation, period, full stop, bar none. This is why conservatives are against all forms of contraception, all sex education beyond abstinence only, and all abortion, as well as no fault divorce, and basic freedom of education.

The core of feminine sexual pleasure is submission and humiliation. And that is amply proven by thousands of years of societies around the world reacting negatively to female sexual pelasure.

>>42817692
>I'm happy to be loved and fucked regularly and we've slowly slipped into very boring straight couple life
What a dream...

>>42817747
>ree conservatives and ancient tradition say this so it must be true
Okay anon, time for your medication.

>>42817750
It's the result of thousands (!) of small and big intentional choices, anon.
I didn't wake up one day like this.

>>42817805
Of course, you must have worked hard for it. Is it worth it? I wish I was a woman dating a man almost every day.

>>42817857
>Is it worth it?
Yes. Even the most boring normie days are worth it. Or the very difficult days at work which lead to me be exhausted when I get home.
Not just being called, but simply being Ms. Nona (and soon Mrs. Anon because I will take his name) puts a smile on my face almost every day.
>I wish I was a woman dating a man almost every day
You already start from a better point than I did.

>>42799031
Okay here's what I want to know. Can a male be totally gay and yet be transgender?

>>42817918
>simply being Ms. Nona (and soon Mrs. Anon because I will take his name)
Lovely.
>You already start from a better point than I did.
Why do you think so? How was your starting point different?

>>42817747
whats insulting is me a bottom brained agp had to wait till 30s to properly learn to be penetrated when i should have been groomed in my teens and been dicked by 20 yr older men for most of my life
it does open your brain big time

File: anime ai.png (307.2 KB)

307.2 KB PNG

i thinkk about agp all day every day and when i look in the mirror i dislike it but it doesnt hit my core because im just a normal straight dude so its like a strange schizophrenic grimacing of not caring but also caring, it's kinda fake caring but real also, strange situaiton

i hate my eyebags and gaunting face

i took estrogen today i couldnt stand my face not having any cuteneess while i coom to feminization 24/7

>>42817982
this dude is pretty if he smiled etc

>>42817950
>How was your starting point different?
I explained more or less upwards itt
I started as a straight guy. Not even bicurious. Killing my attraction to cisfs took years (and only really got totally cured by srs). Then slowly building attraction to men.
Took almost two years to figure out that I wanted to be a straight woman. Then years more to build the sexuality for it (while in the background making the $$ to pay for the physical changes).
You can skip at least 2yrs from my timeline (even more if you're not gynephilic).
Don't get me wrong, the process was mostly pleasurable, but really long an with a lot of intentional choices and strict practices.
Starting with sexuality first came easier because I am ultimately a perv but it also helped a lot with everything else. The more I saw myself as a straight woman, the easier socialization got. It's hard and slow, but also fun, all things considered.

>>42818134
>even more if you're not gynephilic
I guess I am into women too but I'd prefer to be a woman with a man all the time. It's the hottest for sure. Happy to hear you made it, I wish I could do that.

>>42818181
>I wish I could do that
You can. You just don't want to. And that's also fair.
"I can't" rarely exists in the real life. What usually exists is "I want", "I don't want" and "the trade-offs/price".
You may not like the price for it or simply don't want to do it. And that's legitimate and fair. But please, don't say you can't. Basically anyone under 40 without severe physical handicaps absolutely can do it.

>>42818202
What are the trade offs and price?

>>42817961
Glad you finally stopped waiting to be saved and got onto the path of trying yourself.
Grooming rarely happens IRL (and when it does, it's even rarer that it happens to those who need it). The "self" part in self-actualization really does matter the most.
t. >>42818134

>>42818216
The monetary price was around $100k (ffs, srs, vfs).
The social price was losing or get distanced from a few friends for a while. Eventually most did accept me once they realized I wasn't joking at all.
There's also a price in time. I couldn't work for almost 2 years except low pay stuff as I was focused building my androphilia and aggressively tackling my attraction women. Also a few months post srs were far from fun (also not able to work).
There's also weird feelings in the first year. Self affirming yourself as a woman feels fake for a while. Porn helps (but that needs to be changed fundamentally too - first masc x masc and masc x tranny, then never jerking off). Again, it's fun from a point onwards, but the beginning is less fun and requires being intentional and persistence.

>>42818344
>Porn helps (but that needs to be changed fundamentally too - first masc x masc and masc x tranny, then never jerking off)
imo female POV can help a lot

>>42818376
that's later. At least 1yr later when the very idea of jerking off disgusts you. Ideally after you've been with a masc man sexually either as a clocky tranny or as hrt femboy.
Ofc, never top. That's something only after srs.
Even if you're taller, learn to love being had doggy style and missionary. But especially missionary. Nothing builds androphilia faster.
Only then you can start female POV (if you can fine missionary female pov or even tranny pov, that's great).
Only after srs you can drop discipline.
Ik it sounds gooning but i'm totally serious. I psyopped myself into "dysphoria".
Today I get off to stuff I'd never even consider pre hrt or pre srs. Solo male is an absolute no-no before srs, for instance. Solo cisf is no-no always and forever.

>>42818344
>monetary price was around $100k
holy i couldn't even cope with the everyday reality of being a woman like, maintaining hair, skin, changing clothes and following styles even though i love it privately but in a real stakes competetive environment
it's like how everywhere else on the site dipshits are always trying to sell you the most expensive consoom tier option of things feels like anons always advocating for the ferrari of transition when all you need is a beater car

>>42818736
>changing clothes and following styles
Anon, you don't have to go to that extent, lol. Most women really don't.
Once I got comfortable in my identity as a straight woman, I just bought what made me look good and that's it.
>maintaining hair, skin
A less generic shampoo. That's it. Estrogen does the rest.
As for skin, just slightly more expensive soap that balances pH. That's it.
Make up is also a lot easier than youtube tutorials make it out to be.
>ferrari of transition when all you need is a beater car
Good functional srs is about $30k.
High tier ffs is about $50k (tho this can sometimes be done through insurance, I wasn't that lucky).
Also, the cost is over several years (debt is a thing, yk?).
Cheaper options exist, but the trade-offs get worse. If you're giga luckshit with your face, you can get away with cheaper options. Or even no ffs (very rarely tho).
But with srs nobody should look at the price but rather the specifications.

>>42818483
Im not the anon you are replying to. (I'm the anon that was talking to you yesterday about SRS considerations)

Would you mind organizing this into a guide or something? I straight coped as a man for so long I need some help getting back out of it. I kinda have a plan at the moment but I will take all the advice I can from people that have made it like you


>>42818344
>The monetary price was around $100k (ffs, srs, vfs)
Pretty reasonable desu. I spent a little more than that in my early 20s teaching myself to drive cars ridiculously fast.

>>42818836
dealing with complications of taking hrt seems hard enough

>>42818836
>High tier ffs is about $50k (tho this can sometimes be done through insurance, I wasn't that lucky).
>Also, the cost is over several years (debt is a thing, yk?).
>Cheaper options exist, but the trade-offs get worse. If you're giga luckshit with your face, you can get away with cheaper options. Or even no ffs (very rarely tho).
This seems high. I am getting FFS from a top surgeon for $7.5k + $4.5k for an aesthetic add on. I'm having to pay $5k in insurance premiums but then I also get free care and prescriptions for the year because I am hitting my deductible.

>>42800721
>>42806561
mef threads used to be about psychological probing but now they're shill threads for plastic surgery

>>42819051
I'm still learning about my MEF, maybe I will make some threads like that and try to keep them on topic.

>>42818840
>Would you mind organizing this into a guide or something?
That would take too long. But most has sorta been explained here https://archived.moe/lgbt/thread/41887627/
numbers 3, 4 and 5 you can start today.
>I need some help getting back out of it
Start with the easy parts: Change your porn habits today.
Masc x masc, masc x tranny and maybe some sissification.
Order a vibrator and a small dildo (5'' is enough).
Only vibrate your dick. Check out things like these https://www.tranny.one/pl/483223/
This is controversial but to me it was essential to effectively psyop myself into hating my erections. I was masturbating 100% of the time in feminine patterns almost 2yrs before srs.
Once you're closer to srs and the very thought of jerking off disgusts you, then you can introduce some cis straight porn (older pre 2005 variety preferable - more romantic). Here's an example of what I mean - https://www.eporner.com/video-fIgApnB9Ctl/leena-and-shelby-stevens-ian-daniels-jonathan-morgan-supermodel-1-ai-upscaled/
Masc x masc is highly useful at the beginning because you can self insert as the bottom. Plus it's objectively hot. I still occasionally the "bi" kind where two guys get in on and a woman watches.
Masc x tranny is useful right from the start, provided that the tranny always bottoms. Again, older clips are better. Start with this today, unironically - https://www.tranny.one/view/1068074/
Stuff to avoid for at least the next two years:
- solo of any kind
- JOI (for obvious reasons)
- any t4t or tranny topping (especially with cisf)
The stricter you are, the better and faster it works.
The goal is to be an androphilic/straight woman. To get there it's best to avoid experimentation that doesn't fit this goal or exposure to contradictory stuff. When horny, neuroplasticity is higher, hence why this works if taken seriously and you legit want it.
(1/2)

>>42818840
Now onto very easy social stuff you can start this week.
Here's a guide on walking - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOAo2M43kTs&t=293s (do this all the time, even if nobody is watching, you can do this in public because nobody notices or cares)
Here's a guide on posture - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9PIDqW2hUs
Intermediary, get long coats (trench coats, dark colored dresses). They not only look cool on an amab body, but they serve to slowly teach you how to walk in a feminine pattern all the time (because you kinda have to, you'll see).
Meanwhile, continue mental conditioning. Most trannies fail because they don't mentally transition. You don't "feel like a woman" because you inject estradiol. You learn to feel like a woman through constant practice and conditioning. Estradiol is there to slowly change your body as your perception of yourself changes.
If you're not on an srs waitlist and you're over 30, get orchi this year. Don't fall for the memes that E kills your libido. It doesn't. It just changes it to more feminine patterns (hence why mental conditioning is so essential).
If you have a cisf friend to help you with some of the easy social quick wins, great. If not, ideally, don't talk too much to cisfs for at least a year. Make fag/bi cism friends. If you can, avoid trannies IRL for the most part too - most are too brainwormed and not binary and committed.
"Out of sight, out of mind" is true. Low or zero contact with cisfs, absolute zero sexual content/porn with/about cisfs and disciplined conditioning are 90% of the process to eliminating the problem which is attraction to cisfs.
They are my peers and will be yours too :)

>>42818954
>I am getting FFS from a top surgeon for $7.5k + $4.5k for an aesthetic add on
Congratulations for living in a country where this is possible and for being lucky enough to only need that much.
I paid $38k in total for my face a decade ago. Still very happy with the result but I envy those of you who can get away with cheaper.

>>42819250
anon you are replying to.
So I kinda took a different path there. I learned early on to move the pleasure from my dick to my groin and basically did not feel my dick when I masturbated. I also have had phantom pussy since around the start of puberty.
I'm 3 years into HRT and I'm now at the point where I absolutely hate the thing and grasping it turns me off. I have been vibing for about two years now, but I've been gradually losing my ability to disassociate and having the pleasure away from my body is turning me off. It feels like if I don't get SRS soon im going to lose the ability to orgasm.
Like over the past 20 years the only time I have ever deviating from seeing myself as the woman in porn, and trying to imagine what the woman is feeling in porn is a 2-3 year stretch where I tried to straight myself out and self inserted as the man. Otherwise it has exclusively been self inserting as the woman in hetero porn, solo porn, or FPOV. I've abused pot and alcohol for about 15 years to make my ability to disassociate more vivid.

Does this all change what you think I should do? (I haven't read part 2 yet)

>>42819316
I'm already working on this stuff, im going to work your video suggestions into my daily practice regimen. I totally agree with you that it is constant practice, constantly getting comfortable going with the new feelings hormones gives me. I've got an SRS consult at the end of the month. The only reason I still have my nuts is because I use them to help pull my sack tight so I can shave for laser. I'm doing it as a first stage, then I am going to follow up with electrolysis for 12-18 months or however long I am on the waitlist. I get once laser is done and I don't have to shave down to the skin anymore I can ditch the nuts ^_^
E actually did knock down a lot of my libido. I went from having to jack it once a day to it becoming a chore I do once every week to keep atrophy at bay. I'm also a little scared of my female libido, it's simultaneously intoxicating, thrilling, compelling to fantasize being under a guy yet also absolutely terrifying. I totally get off on not being in control, but then it scares me to think about trusting somebody like that.

I'm pretty socially isolated which sucks sometimes but it creates a distraction free environment for development. All my online cism friends are bi/gay. I feel like I am missing feminine influence though. I want people to imitate. I don't have role models. I tried hanging around other trannies IRL and yeah, I know exactly what you are talking about with them not being binary committed.
One thing I should add is that im not and haven't really been romantically attracted to women. Every time I dated it was so I could vicariously live through them. I wanted to have higher resolution fantasies of what it was like to be them. I know... creepy as fuck. I went volcel in my mid 20s because I didn't think it was fair to drag any more ciswomen into my mess that I also didn't understand at the time.

>>42819351
Thanks, I think.... lol
The price I am paying is mostly down to figuring out how to work insurance. I am actually getting a ton of work done. It's just when you hit the deductible you get to stop paying.

$38k for a face you love is still a good deal in my book.

>>42819766
>figuring out how to work insurance
Again, most of the world straight up doesn't have this option.
Here in Europe it was either "free" but guaranteed bogging (and 2+ yrs waitlist) or coughing up the cash and getting the best Ferrari that was available at the time. I chose the Ferrari because the beater car was in fact a Trabant at best.

>>42819640
>It feels like if I don't get SRS soon im going to lose the ability to orgasm
Oh, apologies. You are much more advanced than I thought.
Do you ride the dildo? If not, you should. On the wall is hottest (at least to me). You're where I was in 2018 (I had srs in 2019).
>solo porn
Drop that until after srs. It's bad for you now.
>I get once laser is done and I don't have to shave down to the skin anymore I can ditch the nuts
Sounds about right. I hope you won't be 18 months on a waitlist. I hated the 14 months I was on the waitlist.
>I'm also a little scared of my female libido, it's simultaneously intoxicating, thrilling, compelling to fantasize being under a guy
>I totally get off on not being in control
You're doing great. Once again I apologize for vomiting beginner stuff. You're already 90% through sexually.
Besides srs, what you really need now is to learn to be comfortable with your new libido. It's a bit inconvenient (I know) but it's good to start this process now so by the time you get there your brain will already be prepared to adjust to the physical change real quick.
A boyfriend is what you need. Or at least a fwb that you find hot.
You really should (very carefully!) try grindr or see if you can hit it off IRL with some of your "online friends".
Side note: I don't believe in online friendships at all. None of that is real. What's real is you and real people around you.
You really need to brute force this and socialize IRL.
Just like with porn, impose limits. No more than 30hrs a week online. Then gradually reduce to 10hrs/week. Socialization (of any kind) isn't something that just happens to people. You have to be there for it.
>I know... creepy as fuck
Not to me. Besides, who tf am I to judge?
>I feel like I am missing feminine influence though. I want people to imitate
You're correct. Then you really need to move forward with the second part. Womanmode, practice mannerisms and socialize. Even if it's harrowing at first.
(1/2)

File: example1.png (1.2 MB)

1.2 MB PNG

>>42819743
Observe carefully how regular cisfs around your age dress. Imitate that.
You're a ~30yo straight woman. Don't dress like a slut or like a 70yo or like an "alt" or w/e. Something like picrel is just fine.
Lots of trannies fuck up womanmoding for years because they try to dress like teenagers. I'm sorry, we missed being teenagers. But we can be decent ~30yo women without excess.
Public femininity is a display of tension. Too much excess in any direction is bad. Two accessories (necklace + earrings) is gr8. Three is kinda pushing it. More is too much for an adult straight woman.
Unironically, if you're not excessively clocky, try hanging out with 40yos cisfs. Most of the time it won't work out but older cisfs tend to be less tensed. I learned a lot from a 50yo (still friends with her to this day).
>having the pleasure away from my body is turning me off
Physical point: SRS also moves your prostate a bit to become the g-spot of your srussy. It's why learning to orgasm from anal is so important.
Also, do keep in mind that most cisfs don't orgasm 100% of the time, even when they masturbate.
Do it for the fun of it too. It will frustrate you for a while but in a few months it will further cement a cis-like sexual identity in your mind (very helpful immediately after srs, even tho right now can be annoying).
>I didn't think it was fair to drag any more ciswomen into my mess
cute, but malebrained reason.
In reality: you're a straight woman and straight women don't date women. You had your fun in your youth and now you're ready to settle down.
Long story short: do anything possible to break social isolation. Start with drastically reducing your time online outside of porn.
Ideally, download porn and watch offline.
"social media" is a bad addiction for everyone, but particularly for women.

>>42819931
>Oh, apologies. You are much more advanced than I thought.
No worries ^_^
>Do you ride the dildo? If not, you should. On the wall is hottest (at least to me).
I'm really not comfortable with anal (yet!), I got a few dildos to experiment but I haven't gotten to serious about it. When I insert progesterone I have been having a little fun though.

>A boyfriend is what you need. Or at least a fwb that you find hot.
Yeah I agree. I feel like I need to get over the anal thing first though because I remember having a testosterone libido and it's not fair to not give that an outlet.
>Side note: I don't believe in online friendships at all. None of that is real. What's real is you and real people around you.
>You really need to brute force this and socialize IRL.
Yep im 100% on the same page. I'm planning to move into the city near me to make this easier. I've tried to push with my online friends a bit but they are thousands of miles away and don't want to move (I have met them IRL though).

>>42820055
>You're a ~30yo straight woman.
ehh late 30s >_> I'm looking at my 40s as my last chance to have some fun and find my partner for the rest of my life.

>Public femininity is a display of tension. Too much excess in any direction is bad.
Tell me more, please! I have been looking at masculinity as a display of tension and I have been training myself to relax out of it, to become present, to be expressive, to flow and be graceful.

>Physical point: SRS also moves your prostate a bit to become the g-spot of your srussy. It's why learning to orgasm from anal is so important.
Point taken. I keep forgetting that thing is there.

1/2

>>42820055
>Do it for the fun of it too. It will frustrate you for a while but in a few months it will further cement a cis-like sexual identity in your mind (very helpful immediately after srs, even tho right now can be annoying).
I am going to start masturbating and when it starts becoming a struggle to orgasm, I'll just let it go.

>"social media" is a bad addiction for everyone, but particularly for women.
I have managed to stay almost 100% away from it. So I have that going for me

>In reality: you're a straight woman and straight women don't date women. You had your fun in your youth and now you're ready to settle down.
I'm completely on the same page

>Long story short: do anything possible to break social isolation. Start with drastically reducing your time online outside of porn.
Ideally, download porn and watch offline.
Alright, I know what I have to do ^_^

>>42820199
>I'm really not comfortable with anal (yet!)
Well, what are you waiting for?
Even if you don't love it tremendously, it's still good practice. Anal orgasms pre-op do feel nice most of the time. Post op it's trickier but you can ditch anal altogether then.
So take it as a milestone: you're having fun as a cope while you work towards srs.
You're already at the physical and mental point where it's the easiest. Take advantage of it.
Riding the wall while ignoring the dick was very hot to me. Tho sometimes I'd vibrate it or rub it (but mostly vibrate).
>I feel like I need to get over the anal thing first though
Do both. Anal train WHILE you seek a bf.
Ideally, you find a bf pre-op who will be with you during the recovery post srs (trust me, you will need that).
>ehh late 30s
So you got to sprint.
>I have been training myself to relax out of it
A necessary step. But not sufficient.
The next step is to be comfortable with feminine tension.
The good news is that it's really easier. There are fewer rules (really just dress your age, don't be a gigaslut and... that's it). You already did most of the hard part.
Again, just observe normie women around your age (+/- 7yrs) and imitate that while being cognizant of your body type. Don't be afraid to use tailors too (every big city has affordable ones, not just luxury tier). To this day I get at least a dress a year tailored specifically for me when I find something I really like but can't find it out of the box to fit me.
>I am going to start masturbating and when it starts becoming a struggle to orgasm, I'll just let it go
Yeah, that works. And it works post op too.
I do orgasm 80 to 90% of the time when I masturbate, but when I don't,... oh well. It's still fun and glad I did it.
Don't be shy to take 2hrs for it if needed (and you can afford the time, ofc).
>When I insert progesterone I have been having a little fun though
You're only 3yrs into it. So it's okay to insert more prog.

>>42820373
>So take it as a milestone: you're having fun as a cope while you work towards srs.
This really good framing... Damn it, you got me, lol.

>Riding the wall while ignoring the dick was very hot to me. Tho sometimes I'd vibrate it or rub it (but mostly vibrate).
Now that you mention this, I never wanted to do this when I played around as a guy but I am really curious how differently it will feel now. I'll start with ignoring the dick.

>Ideally, you find a bf pre-op who will be with you during the recovery post srs (trust me, you will need that).
DESU this part is really stressing me out. I feel like I can't have sex properly unless I have SRS. But the recovery from SRS is so brutal I will need a partner for support to enable me to get SRS. You are making the case that the path to getting a pussy is going to go through my ass. As a back up plan one of my faggy friends has said he will support for me a month postop.

>So you got to sprint.
Fortunately I have had multiple fires lit under my ass in the past 4 months, and I think you are lighting another one tonight. Have I said thanks yet? Thank yoooou!

>The next step is to be comfortable with feminine tension.
I'm still really not sure I understand what you mean by feminine tension. Do you mean tightly adhering to feminine presentation? I feel like around me men are all uptight and women are mostly carefree with their expression. Like of course they stick to feminine gender norms but they are very expressive while men are largely stoic.


Would you be interested in trading discords?

>>42820723
>I feel like around me men are all uptight and women are mostly carefree with their expression. Like of course they stick to feminine gender norms but they are very expressive while men are largely stoic.
You are correct. But that's the point, women don't make the tension visible. They keep the brainworms for themselves.
And I insist: it is easier than for men. But that doesn't mean there is no tension.
I already gave examples: too many accessories, dress too young or too old - these are also tensions. Depending on where you are, showing too much or not enough skin is also tension.
They're all less strict than for men, but it doesn't mean they don't exist. Oh they do exist. And other women can be brutal with judgment if you go too far in any direction.
>I feel like I can't have sex properly unless I have SRS
I understand and empathize. I really do. But be strategic about it. You need a bf and you need further cementing of your androphilia and you need to practice IRL how to enjoy being a woman.
>I am really curious how differently it will feel now
Normally it should take longer to cum anally than before. However, train enough and you figure out whole body orgasms.
Feminine sexuality is a lot about patience and discovery. Once you discover and settle on what makes you tick, then it goes into overdrive.
>I'll start with ignoring the dick
Try all combos. Maybe it works starting like that (didn't for me). But don't be shy. Vibe it, rub it. Avoid erections for better outcome.
Orgasming only from anal while limp felt really good both pre-hrt and on hrt. I didn't know at the time but years of that made me better adept at figuring out how to orgasm only from penetration in my srussy.
>discord
I have no social media except a boring facebook page which has mentions of trans stuff and is for work.
Besides discord is terminally malebrained. Very glad it wasn't around when I started and never got on it.
You can e-mail me at Alexandra_st0[at]proton.me though.

>>42820825
>boring facebook page which has mentions of trans stuff
mean which has zero mentions of trans stuff
I do reply to e-mails though. But may take a while since I'm busy.

>>42820825
>They keep the brainworms for themselves.
>I already gave examples: too many accessories, dress too young or too old - these are also tensions.
Ahhhh I get the operating principle now. I was thinking physical tension. I would almost describe that as worries or fixations.
>And other women can be brutal with judgment if you go too far in any direction.
I've already encountered a flavor of this with transwomen.

So If I am going to run with this, the point is to acquire the correct feminine brainworms, but also the ones appropriate for my age? So it might also be really useful to observe women in public and see if I can figure out what aspects of their presentation they are concerned about?

>But be strategic about it. You need a bf and you need further cementing of your androphilia and you need to practice IRL how to enjoy being a woman.
God that is a mindfuck to start thinking about using sex as strategy. I totally get what you are saying and I am on the same page. I can adjust to the new reality. just fucking wow... that is a role reversal lol
I appreciate you being blunt about that.

>Try all combos. Maybe it works starting like that (didn't for me). But don't be shy.
I'll go into it with an open mind and explore until I find what works. I just really want to get the hell away from my dick, and prior anal play for me was about amplifying penile orgasms.
I'll keep my attention on this being practice for life post-op. I'll get as much joy as I can out of the cope until I make it.

I think what you said earlier about associating my prostate with orgasm is really important and there is no point in waiting to start that.

>You can e-mail me
Thank you, I did! Look for the address with a number and a color similar to purple. I sent it 9 minutes past the hour.

>>42820949
>I've already encountered a flavor of this with transwomen
Binary transwomen are as brutal as cisfs.
However, most transwomen are simply not like me and you. The judgment by most trannies can safely be ignored.
>the point is to acquire the correct feminine brainworms, but also the ones appropriate for my age?
In short, yes.
And observing women in public is by far the fastest way to figure out where the limits are and also to get an idea on what might work for you.
The "thrift store"/amazon shopping spree and online posting is the wrong way.
>God that is a mindfuck to start thinking about using sex as strategy
Sorry, that's how straight women actually work.
Going through the meta-attraction stage is unavoidable, regardless of how you feel about it. Also, a lot of cisfs stick to meta attraction. Although it is better to eventually overcome it and just outright love men. But you're not there yet. For now you just figure out meta attraction and how to use it IRL. Don't beat yourself over it. Women don't.
>anal play for me was about amplifying penile orgasms
Doesn't quite work like that on hrt. It is a bit different.

itt a bunch of mentally ill freaks helping one another brainwash themselves

>>42821398
and that's fucking beautiful

>>42821398
Most mefs don't deny being freaks tho. Also, do check the board you're on.
>>42821633
What's beautiful?

>>42818840
>I spent a little more than that in my early 20s teaching myself to drive cars ridiculously fast
wtf how about doing something actually useful like going to a good university
>>42819250
>masc x masc
ewwwwwwwwwwww not touching with a 100 ft pole
i do look at pics of cocks, hairy bodies and assholes on /hm/ as long as the guy has dominant energy
>masc x tranny where tranny never tops
ofc
>solo
how else do you get inspo and picking up striptease cues
>JOI
i like being femsplained and stacies telling me what i am and what to do
>>42820055
i want to do all this while being a feminine agp male ngl
>>42821398
yeah not reading all that but it's just seems condensed material from sissy 'hypno' stuff from all the years nothing new

>>42822350
>ewwwwwwwwwwww not touching with a 100 ft pole
Depends where you are. Right at the beginning it was really useful to me. Remember this is for people who start as straight guys (like I did). Gay coping phase is necessary. Masc x masc porn self-inserting as the bottom is a necessary step.
>masc x tranny where tranny never tops
>ofc
Glad we agree. Ideally the tranny is always limp and orgasms through anal.
Also, at first, clips where the trany jerks off should be avoided.
>how else do you get inspo and picking up striptease cues
I should've said solo masturbation.
solo male - big no no because it leads to jerking off. Jerking off is for men. It goes out first. Only go back to it after srs.
solo female - of no use until closer to srs
solo tranny - okay only if it's like this and inspirational - https://x-tg.tube/video/58331/maddietwt-aka-maddietwt-onlyfans-i-cut-a-lot-out-cause-it-was-the-same-thing-for-a-while-i-was/
Solo dancing videos or striptease can be okay but only with trannies. No cisfs for at least a year.
>i like being femsplained and stacies telling me what i am and what to do
sissyfication is fine (in fact desirable at first) but JOI is not because of the JO part.
Also, no cisfs video at least in the first year. Only audio affirmations.
>i want to do all this while being a feminine agp male ngl
do it. I'm not saying everyone should have my objectives. I was writing specifically for a certain case - going from straight guy to straight woman as fast as possible.

>>42822410
straight guy to straight woman is actually what I see in a lot of basic non mef non agp trannies who have a typical transition and just naturally reorient themselves towards guys without all these force fem steps.

>>42822466
>typical transition
respectfully, that no longer means anything now that DiY exists.
>just naturally reorient themselves towards guys without all these force fem
it does happen, but it's not that common. Transbians are still the norm :(
Also, what about the rest who want to but are stuck in repper hell? These steps do unlock those.
>basic non mef non agp trannies
non-mef AND non agp? Well of course what's left is hsts who already troon as androphilic.

>>42822410
i only masturbate prone i've never jerked off like a guy in my life
>do it
yeah but how i don't feel like opening up to anyone but thats a whole different can of worms
>>42822466
getting guys attention is easy but how many troons are even properly friends with women

>>42822497
>i only masturbate prone i've never jerked off like a guy in my life
Based. I wish I were like that. Unlearning masturbation patterns was hard. Even a few months before SRS, after years of not jerking off, I was still unsure I was in the clear.
Still, you should try this - https://x-tg.tube/video/58331/maddietwt-aka-maddietwt-onlyfans-i-cut-a-lot-out-cause-it-was-the-same-thing-for-a-while-i-was/
>yeah but how
Come out as fag/enby. Suddenly there's less pressure from that can of worms. Also, coming out publicly adds positive pressure. Now that you're a bottom fag, you can and you're indeed lowkey expected to express like one.

File: 1772312673387593m.jpg (51.9 KB)

51.9 KB JPG

wth is this thread??

>>42822539
it's devolved into pure degeneracy.

>>42822582
reppers huh?

I thought the replies would just be some kinky fantasies about thinking of yourself as a girl, I didn't expect people to actually transform their lives around the thing... kind of bonkers desu

>>42822619
>kind of bonkers
Life's too short to care what reppers think.

>>42822466

This is a lost art now because every single new tranny defaults to "i like women!" For some weird autistic reason.

>>42822626
not a repper just seriously didn't think was a real thing, thought it was just a fantasy. but if it's not hurting anybody then go for it. wouldn't tell too many people though lol

>>42822653
>wouldn't tell too many people though
Do I tell people that I trooned for the fetish? Of course not. I'm a regular professional woman now.
Do I tell reppers that this is indeed possible? Yes! There should be guides more easily available. Some incels could benefit from that as well.
Is it for everyone? Absolutely not. But it's for a lot more AGPs who are stuck in straight guy life. And for some non-AGPs as well.

>>42822677
you assume transitioning is the correct step for cis guys with agp... some people just want to live their lives as their birth gender and indulge in a little fetish now and again, rather than become something they aren't

>>42822694
>you assume transitioning is the correct step for cis guys with agp
Where did I say that?
I said explicitly that it's not for everyone.
I do believe more agps should explore themselves yes. Even if they don't end up transitioning.

>>42822619
what do you think transition is or do you think trooning is somehow entirely devoid of sex
>>42822636
what lying to keep face?

>>42822677
I don't think any of these people should do that, because they'd be fucking up their lives just to get their rocks off. It's misguiding people to their detriment.

>>42822530
how the hell do you come out theres no formal coming out here if you mean just be fem in small ways i've always done that never let a speck of hair grow on your face etc and keep hair a bit long although i do chicken out with the hair sometimes i want to wear clothes with feminine silhouette but then again how does all this make you somehow get female friends or whatever and where do i draw the line since trooning is not an option

>>42822912
>where do i draw the line
You can only find that answer if you get serious about experimenting. And also put some order in your mind about goals.
>trooning is not an option
Full time social transition may not be an option, but HRT is an option. If you have Internet connection, you can order HRT to at least keep your physique and enbycope.

>>42800349

AGP is NOT normal female sexuality
Females barely have a sexuality and it looks superficially like AGP but it is not the same thing

>>42823340
Only real goal is to get rid of disassociation
Did hrt in the past but then you run into being a guy with breasts issue

>>42823790
>Only real goal is to get rid of disassociation
Harder to do for most.
Easier is to shift its focus. Disassociate from being a guy to make room for a feminine identity.
>Did hrt in the past but then you run into being a guy with breasts issue
Yeah, that's what happens when one doesn't transition mentally as well.

>>42823478
>Females barely have a sexuality and it looks superficially like AGP but it is not the same thing
What is the difference?

>>42824192
Everyone seems to be confused about this but the actual literature on this would also inform you

Females learn they are valuable and simply fantasize about being valuable
Trannies goon their manclitties and fantasize about becoming females

these might seem the same because it's an auto-erotic vector and that itself screams "girl" because men are taught to resent themselves unless they're bi, homo, or wealthy

File: be4946887ea9e57edc8ac6d78820caec.jpg (100.4 KB)

100.4 KB JPG

>>42800248
holy moly macaroni

>>42824217
>these might seem the same because it's an auto-erotic vector and that itself screams "girl"
What is "auto erotic" about? Like when woman imagines being hot and being fucked by man it's autoerotic but when man imagines being hot and fucking a woman it's not?

>>42824245
I know, right? That post has me diamonds.

>>42823826
>Yeah, that's what happens when one doesn't transition mentally as well.
explain

>>42824412
Why is it so hot? I don't feel like a woman at all but nothing turns me on as much as imagining being one and having sex with a man.

>>42822619
Some of us aren't hobbyists. We take this seriously and go all the way because nothing less will be good enough.

>>42824724
>go all the way
Have you been succesful?

>>42823826
Femininity does make you unfettered
But denial is important too otherwise you're changing one set of problems for another sure internal ones are priority but trooning is so weird and alienating

File: 1691612320931.png (1.1 MB)

1.1 MB PNG

I've been dealing with this for about 8 years. I tried going the opposite route, like going to the gym and taking steroids, but it didn't work. My gains were negligible, and I gained much more ass than arms, and it was already pretty big. In fact, that's what made me become agp i think, my genetics make me gain only in the lower body and very little in the upper body. I recently bought some mild hormones recommended by Grok to start slowly. I don't want to transition, I just want to see what happens.

>>42824304
Men don't imagine being hot nearly as much as you think.
Externalized attraction means the stimulus source needs to be attractive and your goal is obtain it, viscerally.

Gooning to what you look like is bi / homo behavior

>>42825167
Makes sense. So it's really about target of the attraction.

>>42799031
im ftm with agp i developed through brainwashing as a tool in forced detransition. it was used to make me "willingly" go along with the detransition, so in a way yes i transitioned because of agp.

i felt like was having a really good time with it, was hot, but i had a complete disconnect from myself and my body, and was out of my mind dissociated 24/7. still sometimes fantasize about it but am mostly repulsed and reminded of that horrible experience by it, and much better off just being a man now. most of the time i just feel horrible about how it ruined my body.

>>42825329
What was it like?

>>42825329
Has that in any way informed your opinion on MtF transitioners with AGP (alongside dysphoria) as a driving force?
Like, do you think they have other, deeper issues that, like in your case, AGP only developed from as a symptom?
Would you say them transitioning is "giving in" to dissociation, basically?

I ask that because I am currently 4 months on HRT as an AGP male. It really does help make me feel better about looking in the mirror, and I like the lower libido. But I am worried about giving up the "purity" of living as my birth gender, even tho I suffered from maturing into a man.

>>42825367
i dont remember most of the process, i know i lost nearly all of my memories of the prior couple years where i had transitioned and i was made to believe that i am a woman and i was on some kind of mission to turn myself into my ideal girlfriend because thats the meaning of life or something (im a straight guy). it was hot to see my body feminise and i really resonated with mainstream transfem communities, even made some advice posts for transfems because i was a very luckshit ftm before that, so i had to figure out how to properly feminise my masculine body as well. not sure how accurate that is because i have a massive memory gap there again. next thing i know is regaining my memories of everything before it and of being a man, going through a year of complete hell about it and finally transitioning back to male.

>>42825409
That must have been so insane to experience FtMtFtM. Are you sometimes tempted to go for a third run?

>>42825400
i related a lot to many trans women, especially those that fall somewhere in the direction of agp, was very very active in that subset of trans woman communities, the r/traa and adjacent ones, all that.
i dont think agp necessarily always is a symptom like it was for me. it took a hell of a lot of brainwashing and dissociation to make me agp and if they are agp trans women without all that im very sure its (mostly) their natural and healthy state of being.

i know many agp trans women actually get less dissociated as well when transitioning, so that can be a good indicator of whether its right for you

>>42825447
never again oh god i would rather die.
that experience was genuinely hell

>>42825462
Thank you for the answer!
Yes, I feel less numb, self loathing and generally more content and positive on HRT.
I feel like I'm coming out of my shell for the first time in years, and learn to enjoy things again.
Also got more productive.

So I'll just continue to follow this path for now and see where it leads me.

Thanks again, and best of luck to you :)

>>42825491
that def sounds like youre on a good path.
my dissociation and detachment has also been getting lots better with transitioning
good luck to you too

>>42825329
>much better off just being a man now
Are you sure

>>42825527
yes

>>42825544
How is it better

>>42825645
its just normal. i feel normal, i interact with people normally, i can think straight, i can hug pretty women as a man

mostly its just the physical dysphoria and borderline estrogen allergy my brain has, but im also much more socially in tune as male

>>42824792
Personaly im in process. Much of thr advice given in this thread is from ladies that have gone all the way. The advice here is not larp.

>>42825684
What have you done so far? What are your plans?

>>42799031
For me it's just a fantasy i enjoy sometimes, i like who i was born to be most of the time. Also, i'm intelligent enough to know being trans is not the same as being a biological woman (what i'm attracted to in the first place).

>>42825712
>3 years of hrt
>2 years of laser on my face. I started getting laser everywhere else along the way
>FFS in a couple weeks
>Working on my voice, my wardrobe, my mannerisms
>Fully out to everybody including telling them i'm into men
>Consult set up for SRS
>Paperwork mostly changed

The biggest work has been breaking down the repper personality I built. That has been a daily practice. I was terrified to let myself feel how estrogen was changing my internal experience. At first it was thilling, then it became "holy shit this is going so far I don't recognize my own feelings anymore", to "more, more! I want to lose myself in this, drown me in estrogen!". I really, really had to work on myself to get there, and I understand how so many trannies do not have the mental fortitude to allow that process to happen.

I'm not anywhere close to where I want to be yet. I have just wrapped up letting go of who I was. Now I have just started positively moving into feminity as a dynamic, constant practice. What that meams at the moment is allowing my identity to shift. Seeing my body as as feminine. My actions as feminine. Part of this has also been accepting myself as a transwoman, at least at the moment. And I mean that both in the traditional sense but also as a transitional woman. I'm not a full on woman yet, and to proceed im finding I have to accept that im a mix of male and female traits at the moment, im in development.

>>42825162
>opposite direction
I've done the same, and while it does develop certain aspects of the personality which are useful for surviving in the world, it doesn't seem to fully align with internal strengths. This thread seems useful for oriengint oneself around behavior rather than identity.

>>42825162
There is no such thing as mild hormones. These arent drugs despite what /pol/ says. You either take enough for them to be effective of your body supresses the placebo you are taking. Jump in with both feet or don't.

>>42826544
>breaking down the repper personality I built
yea nah I like my repper personality, it prevents me from being cringe

>>42829031
Reppers are like a stinky person. They get so used to their own brand they stop noticing how cringe they are. Because yeah... im sure you are mr. cool and natural trying desperately to keep half your personality hidden all the time.

>>42829088
if no one knows I’m a repper then it’s not cringe, I’m just your average dude

>>42829156
Oh everybody knows

Well, I guess conservatives are right when they call trannies freaks.

>>42828989
>>42829030
I'm starting to regain some clarity, I think I'll stop doing this, it's a shame I already bought it and I'll lose the money.
Fuck