if it gets too hard you can just manmode?? who cares

>>42823865
manmoding would probably make me kill myself tbqh

>>42823849
you should definitely get a boyfriend but idk about the misgendering
i'm 31 and in a similar situation although i escape most misgendering by just staying at home

>>42823895
why

>>42824012
why would presenting as a man and being perceived as a man make me want to kill myself? maybe because I transitioned to avoid the feeling of wanting to kill myself because I looked like a man and was perceived as a man

>>42823849
>and really worry about looking more masculine as I lose more and more "baby fat"
HRT really does wonder on that actually. I've seen it on hrtwinks (or w/e the term is). Sure, they don't look 20 at 38, but they do look more feminine, not more masculine.
>really feeling like a woman
This is your problem. You haven't transitioned mentally, just physically.
It's not too late to start. It's actually easier if you already had srs.

>>42823993
how did you get a bf staying mostly at home? also what's it like having a bf .-.

>>42824037
>HRT really does wonder on that actually
all I can do is hope

>You haven't transitioned mentally, just physically
I do think I've actually done a good job transitioning mentally, I just get way too much of my self worth and validity from the way other people see me. when I'm alone I feel very secure in my femininity

>>42824029
But manmoding wont change how you look just your clothes. idgi

>>42823849
>hrt for 9 years starting at 21
>still misgendered
grim
i am so sorry

>>42824043
i went to a bar once and met him...
umm it's nice because i can always cuddle with him when i'm feeling sad and his body is a lot more masculine than mine so i don't feel like a man around him

>>42824074
haha yeah, it's okay. some bone structures are simply not meant to transition. I would have been okay if I started hrt in grade 9 before my chadification

>>42824083
just a generic bar? I can't imagine just casually meeting a man who would be okay with a trans girlfriend at an average bar

>>42824104
i am post op so that helped i guess
i assume he could tell but he didn't seem too surprised by the pussy so idk

>>42824064
>I do think I've actually done a good job transitioning mentally
You sure about that?
Your mannerisms likely don't pass. Your language doesn't quite pass. Your attitude is enby at best. Ik this is an anon board but the point of mental transition is to make the habits the norm even when nobody is watching or knows.
You need a new purpose to get out of the fog. Here it is: get back to the drawing board on mental transition.
Also, do take some "risks" for crying out loud. Being a shut in is actively hindering your socialization. The weather is getting nicer (unless you're in Australia or ZA). Be out more. Alot more.
And learn to give fewer fucks. As women, we're always short on fucks to give (both literally and metaphorically). 50%+ of the people would treat you badly no matter what you do.
But you won't find your IRL tribe and social circle(s) if you don't even try.
Wallowing in misery will just keep on harming you nona.

>>42824116
condescending bitch

>>42824116
thank you for your blunt honesty : )
I used to be the person you're describing but not anymore. I'm far from a shut in, I have a full time in person job and hang out with friends often. I dress feminine but don't have a traditionally girly personality and i know that can hurt me at times. You are right though, I do need to care less, and there are times where I do think fuck it, but that shield can sometimes crack and it's times like these where I wonder what I'm doing wrong. I used to post here daily, I can count the number of days I've been here on two hands in the past 3 years.

>>42824147
I may be a condescending bitch, but I'm also not wrong. And you know it.
I mean you no harm. I've been where you are and worse. I was also pushed by an elder to put my big girl pants and start fixing shit. And, lo and behold, it actually worked. Not overnight, but eventually things do improve if you try honestly rather than wallow in misery or cope as being content when you're really not.

>>42824113
does he know now? I'm also post op so you give me hope haha

>>42824186
4 the record that wasn't me (op) I don't find you condescending. passion just means you care

>>42823849
>and don't regret a day on hrt
Sure you don’t lol
You fell for a meme/psyop.

>>42824190
yeah we talked about it

>>42824173
Uh oh. I thought it was you who called me a condescending bitch.
>I can count the number of days I've been here on two hands in the past 3 years.
That is good progress, yes.
>don't have a traditionally girly personality
You're 30. You're a grown adult woman. Lean on that.
You (partially) missed the opportunity to be girly (some of it through no fault of your own). It is what it is. Work with what you have within the limits of what's possible.
>but that shield can sometimes crack
We're all imperfect. And we can't be the most joyful women every day of the year.
>and it's times like these where I wonder what I'm doing wrong
Besides what I already said, you focus too much on the details that don't matter (oh no, you had a bad day - we all do) and not enough on the details that do matter.
You are in fact mostly fine, but you haven't been finetuning. I'm certainly not the same woman I was 8-9 yrs ago. We all change. And that's fine. It's part of becoming a functional adult (the path on which you're doing okay - just not appreciating it justly).
If you're outdoorsy, just get more intentional at opening up to guys. It's the 21st century. Women can approach men, yk? Not trying to be sarcastic at all. I lowkey "chased" my soon to be husband.
Work with what you have and give fewer fucks.

>>42823849
I can see the writing on the wall so I'm gearing up to manmode forever. Nobody can even tell I'm trans. They just think I'm a strange dude

>>42824147
Sometimes people need bluntness i know i need that from my boyfriends otherwise I get locked in indecision and nerves

>>42823849
>Anyone else in the same boat?
hey nona, i'm in a similar situation and am 31. 15 years hrt and ffs as well. i kinda manmode most days though so it's probably my fault.
>I still get misgendered most days
what do you normally do, in what sorts of situations do you get misgendered? i find that people don't usually gender me that often where i live.

>>42823849
That sucks I’m sorry. 9 years HRT + post FFS and still getting misgendered is sui fuel honestly. That’s crazy…

>>42825046
the real problem is that the poster is making a bunch of assumptions of op, kinda makes this thread come off as bait. tbqh

>>42825189
I work in a public facing government job, so I see pretty much all different kinds of people. Generally the people who misgender me are immigrants, old people, or people in vulnerable situations. It's more correlation than causation but for some reason those populations seem to feel the need to always use "sir" or "ma'am"

>>42825242
it's not by everyone but it happens often enough to really weigh on me. it's never out of malice but it really hurts to be having a good conversation for someone only for them to say "thank you very much sir" like really? reaaaally?

>>42825248
unfortunately not a bait thread haha just a long face negative canthal tilt tranny