Speaking of Hemingway and Faulkner, have your fics ever taken inspiration from so-called "great literature"?

File: eyes on the prize.png (163.7 KB)

163.7 KB PNG

First for best duo!
Enjoy this conveniently packaged Tuna: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/94526/twilights-plan

File: Screenshot 2026-02-23 at 05-42-51 A Craving for Confections - Chaotic Cravings - Fimfiction.png (23.3 KB)

23.3 KB PNG

Third for finally finding a use for coloured text!

>>43061432
I keep intending to translate a poem to pony, but haven't done so yet.

>>43061433
kek

>>43061429
the most vile op post I have seen from this thread in a while.

>>43061429
whole lot of suckling and breastfeeding in the itt. this time.

>>43061445
>>43061501
Blame Alex, who is into cryptocurrency and wants to suckle Celestia.

File: grammar1.png (469.7 KB)

469.7 KB PNG

>>43061432
Is Catch-22 considered that? I love Catch-22.

>>43061587
He DENIES his desire to want to suckle Celestia, it's just as a man in the body of a baby alicorn, he requires alicorn milk to survive. It's not his fault he has to nurse on Celestia's titties while he wears diapers. He just has to.

>>43061618
A true case of nature and nurture.

Any ones where Celestia has like
An actual baby

>>43061714
The no nose knows series. Though unfortunately it’s never gonna be completed and the story slowly gets worse as it goes on.

>>43061804
Yeah that one kind of sucked. I don't think I'd want to suffer through that.

>>43061439
I've learned you can just use [color=gold] here, although I may swap it out to use [color=#FFD700] later just in case something ever changes.

>>43061938
I don't think official CSS standards are changing any time soon.

>>43062001
The markup handling on Fimfiction might, though.

File: Anon learns about the Congo war.jpg (933.8 KB)

933.8 KB JPG

Any good war comedy fics?

File: image_2026-02-23_233007593.png (9.4 KB)

9.4 KB PNG

I 'ad a giggle.

>>43062104
I think the one in the starter kit was fine, even if it was a crackfic.

>>43060650
Why'd you have to remind me about the "Dash gets skullfucked in the eye socket and gets head pregnant" commission idea he rejected? Was it foreshadowing Rarifag eventually joining the thread?

>>43062104
There's that one artillery spotting fic I inexplicably can't find on Fimfic because the author apparently never used the term "artillery spotting" in the whole oneshot.

>>43062259
kek

I wasn't aware that was a commission. From what I know, he just started writing it one day, and then stopped soon thereafter. Also, Discord was fucking her nostril, not her eye socket.

>>43062259
>Dash gets skullfucked in the eye socket and gets head pregnant
Sometimes I'm glad I stay in my lane.

>>43061587
>>43061618
I am genuinely tired of the alex meme
There is ONE joke about a shitty slopfic, and now the entire itt and several threads already are full of people smugly repeating the same joke. "Ah yes alex who wants to suckle Celestia and is into cryptocurrency. I'm absolutely chuffed just thinking about it, can you imagine? Alex is into cryptocurrency, AND he wants to suckle Celestia! Or perhaps he doesn't want to suckle Celestia (while being into cryptocurrency), but either way, Alex is into cryptocurrency and suckles Celestia. Have you heard? What a lark! He, that is Alex, suckling Celestia, also he's into cryptocurrency! Alex, he's into cryptocurrency, and also he wants to (or doesn't) suckle Celestia! By Jove, he needs dat alicorn milk (and cryptocurrency)! Truly marvellous."
I think I've rather gotten the point by now yes.

>>43062259
>Dash gets skullfucked in the eye socket and gets head pregnant
I thought he was the one writing the snuffverse fics with his griffon OC, I don't remember a Dash skullfucking fic. Did I mix him up with someone else?

>>43062787
This.
The HIE copypasta was funnier

>>43062803
Regidar wrote, or rather started, the story about Discord fucking Rainbow Dash's nose and impregnating her head.

>>43062854
>regidar
huh what we were talking about golden just earlier

>>43062810
The cryptocurrency genre is not for the faint of heart. It’s not just about a human suckling Celestia or wanting to fuck Rarity; it’s about transcending the boundaries of fiction itself. Just as you wouldn't expect to stumble upon a Shakespearean play in a high school drama class, or find the nuances of a Tolstoy novel in a community book club, you simply cannot expect mere /fimfic/ posters to grasp and master the profound depths and soul-stirring complexities of the cryptocurrency genre. It's the apex of storytelling. Too intricate, too delicate, too soulful for most to comprehend, let alone capture in writing. The problem isn’t with the genre. The issue lies in its towering grandeur, which is just too monumental for the average writer. We don't lack good cryptocurrency stories; we lack the literary giants to pen them.

>>43062787
We get, Alex, you sold bitcoin too low and will never make it to Equestria.

>>43062861
S0mething about nasal sex.

Is the Alex thing an evolution of the guy who is into cryptocurrency and wants to fuck Rarity?

File: 1634938555979.jpg (474.7 KB)

474.7 KB JPG

No dying yet, /fimfic/!

we should have made ViE the new meme

File: IMG_4916.png (102.8 KB)

102.8 KB PNG

Hey. I’m the guy who updates the past bookclub list. For various reasons I won’t be able to do that anymore.
Could somebody else take over for me?
Thanks.

>>43063050
It's about a shitty fic where a guy ends up as a baby. Normal enough crap, but the fact about the fic is that circumstances are set up so that the baby man HAS to be breastfed by Celestia. This is the focus of the entire fic. This is somehow supposed to be not a fetish fic.

>>43063439
Sure, I'll do it.

>>43063439
are you killing yourself?

>A story by GoldWing in the feature box
when are we getting the temu Ashen Horizons

File: his entire profile is dedicated to hating flurry.jpg (200.3 KB)

200.3 KB JPG

Tryhard alert!
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/587645/baby-pony-flurry-hearts-heartfelt-karma
It's about as shallow and edgy as you'd expect, but frankly the worst thing about it is the run-on sentences, he'll stitch what should be four or five into one endless unholy abomination of a single sentence, and every clause will be written in the most straightforward, repetitive way, and frankly I think it qualifies as worse torture than what the author out Flurry through, and the dialogue isn't any better.
>I was going to keep it a surprise, but I actually paid a visit to little Flurry Heart earlier, or, as I like to call her, Pussy Scat.
It's phrased like it's a joke or play on words, but the most I could think of would be a play on "pussycat" and that only works if there's a reason to call Flurry that.

I rate autism/10—the "makes rant videos about caillou" kind, to be specific.

File: can't make this shit up.jpg (81.9 KB)

81.9 KB JPG

>>43063854
I got this as the error message on my first attempt to post...

>>43063870
that means you double clicked.

>>43063935
Some people should've been double-clicked.

>>43063935
I must've, yeah. I just thought it was funny to get it on a post about a 2edgy4me infanticide and abortion fic.

>>43063650
Do you want a like explanation or the actual explanation?

>>43064071
*joke, not like.

>>43061439
I translated a short story to English and then to pony, but haven't posted it because I'm afraid it might break the site rules. If you do end up translating that poem, would you keep it to yourself or what alternative would you use?

>Paul is such a boomer he got conned into writing an unironnic review for AIslop when he could've spent that time and effort reading and reviewing (You)r fic
Tragic!

>>43064373
>To my surprise, none of that grammatical illiteracy is present within the story proper. I don’t think I saw a single error in that regard. Not in the narration, not in typos. It’s a shockingly clean story. One must wonder why NJH12 was able to write the story so grammatically well but not the cover page
Sigh

File: inventing new kinds of words with my word technology.png (50.8 KB)

50.8 KB PNG

>>43064496
How did he not immediately clock it, like dude
C'mon

>>43064196
Well, what I'm planning would be a pony parody, effectively. That's clearly transformative enough. I don't know what you're doing well enough to say. My only concern is the length, but this is a pretty long poem, so I should be fine there.

>>43064540
This literally reads like a quote from a villain

>>43063050
Alex, who is into cryptocurrency and wants to suckle Celestia, is not an evolution of but rather a spiritual companion to Travis, who is into cryptocurrency and wants to fuck Rarity.

>>43064540
What mystifies me is that I reported the story days ago and it's still up.

>>43064630
A bunch of people did.

>>43064809
Neighponese

File: purple nightdog.jpg (649.6 KB)

649.6 KB JPG

>>43064933
OK, I fixed it.

I can't believe I'm saying this but at least the age regression mom Celestia story isn't fucking AI.

>>43065118
>Never thought I'd die fighting side by side with a Celestia Age Regression Diaper Breastfeeding Mommy Fic Writer

>>43065143
>How about side by side with an HiE self insert?

>>43062272
>>43062803
>Discord was fucking her nostril, not her eye socket
>griffon OC
You're both thinking of a different one. Someone tried to commission him to write a fic where someone skull-fucked the Dash from Empty Horizons in her empty eye socket, with the subsequent magic head pregnancy causing her head to explode.

File: by my beard.png (605.3 KB)

605.3 KB PNG

>>43065194
You know you've made it as a writer when people's fantasies about your characters get this deranged.

>>43065156
>Together, we're the Elements of Authenticity. Using our rainbow lasers, we blast the AI slop prompter.

But without AI the general would be even deader.

File: luna rainbow stars.jpg (83.2 KB)

83.2 KB JPG

>>43065714
So? More best pony posting is good.
Even the captcha agrees.

i just had a dream where math spook rewrote requiem for a friend into a 2nd person aie fic where anon gets with octavia. it was very generic and only resembled the original in the most surface level aspects.
anyone else have any fimfic related dreams?

>>43065745
I once dreamed I wrote a chapter of my fic on paper and it got lost.

>>43065714
Truly, hatred brings us together.

>>43065745
Sort of... I dreamt last night that I watched an episode where some angsty unicorn mare that looked like she was designed by Nomura felt like she understood what Luna had gone through with feeling rejected by society, but felt betrayed/angry that Luna had left all her bitterness about it behind and opened up her heart... so she like magically impregnated her or something (she looked 9 months along within like 30 minutes) with (I think) the remnants of Nightmare Moon so that they could... I dunno, whatever sort of school shooter "burn it all down" plot she would've revealed if I didn't wake up by then. There was a gratuitous close-up shot of her all pregnant but the fully-detailed nudity would've been more appreciated if she wasn't inexplicably humanized for that one scene specifically.

Anyways, the weird pregnancy focus made me think of one author in particular... It's also probably the first pony-related dream I've had that I could realistically turn into an actual story, the others have too much dream nonsense.

>>43065745
>anyone else have any fimfic related dreams?
I may have previously, but none recently, no.

>>43066062
Very nice, thank you for sharing this with us.

>>43065745
I dreamed my cat got hurt.

>>43065745
I once had a very bizarre dream where I was transported 50 years into the future and the first thing I was worried about was if 4chan and /mlp/ still existed. Turns out they did, but another pony board had been created in the past, existed for 10 years and then was deleted while I was away. Then I created a thread on /mlp/ telling people that I'm from the past and the dream ended.

>>43066429
That's what you get for attentionwhoring.

>>43066429
It wasn't a dream, anon. In the dystopia of the future, mods send you back half a century for making a meta thread.
t. got 60 years penalty for an OP pic with the forbidden mare

>>43065745
I do want people to think about my stories, but not like this.

It might be entertaining, though:
>Octavia cried. She said, “I’m so sad that Vinyl died!”
>You scritched her ears and said, “Nothing that a good human dicking can’t fix!”

File: IMG_5122.gif (224.4 KB)

224.4 KB GIF

>>43066429
The only way this place is surviving that long and not becoming something completely different is if it becomes a project run by some future chud occupied government or by some chud doing it on his own that is protected by their chud occupied government.

>>43067039
replace "dicking" with "relationship" and that was pretty much what the rewrite in the dream was like. it was generic romance rather than generic smut, but it was still a wish fulfilment fic that was less about octavia responding to vinyl's death and more about anon responding to octavia's grief. i remember being pretty upset in the dream because the new version completely replaced the original, so you couldn't even read the original on the site anymore.

>>43067403
Well, now I know what I’m doing for April Fool’s!

For Sale: Celestia's tits, never suckled.

File: 3446811.gif (1.8 MB)

1.8 MB GIF

>>43067554

>>43065745
I had one of those "you find a 10/10 pornfic but when you go to download it, it's deleted and you spend the next two hours scouring caches and archives trying to find it again" dreams. I get them way more often for images, though.

File: 1770595588331836.png (200.4 KB)

200.4 KB PNG

>>43067039
>“Nothing that a good human dicking can’t fix!”
fucking lost

>>43065745
I've dreamt about the same scene from one fic twice now (Surviving Sand Island). I'm not sure why it's come up considering It's something I read about eight years ago now. It was a pretty cool part of the fic at least.

>>43068099
What's the scene?

>>43068099
First time I have ever seen that fic mentioned here.
I dropped it after a fair ways in when rarity and dash traveled to a nearby island from the one they crashed on.

>>43068240
Spoilers since this takes place halfway through. Rarity and Rainbow fight the pirate Captain Squall, who is responsible for everypony being stuck on the island(s) in the first place. She manipulates some sand with her magic and the visual stuck with me for some reason
>>43068343
Well you got further than I did the first two times I dropped it. Not sure why those readings failed, but once I turned it into a commute-and-whenever-I-have-a-spare-moment reading, and got to the more interesting developments, I enjoyed it more.
What made you drop it there? At that point I was already hooked.

File: 3dgifmaker69953.gif (1.1 MB)

1.1 MB GIF

To the anon who told me Utaan was really good: fuck you. Fuck you. Genuinely fuck you. The second half of that fic was the most pointless, annoying, and abysmal read I've tortured myself with. I don't think I've read something with worse dialogue or Marvel-esque fight scenes. I'm not going to bother with Ofolrodi and I will scream if I see the words "forelimb", "harmonic", or "fart" ever again. This is by the same guy who wrote Background Pony?
>"We have to knock le army of soldiers out guyz!!1! for harmony n stuff!!!"
>Blows up a ship full of soldiers and sailors with a satchel charge
>"No for realz don't kill em bros!! We ain't da bad guys!!"
As if the first battle with the Herald versus the Central Guard wasn't already retarded enough. I'm going to go sulk and seethe before I finally get around to reading The Immortal Game instead.

>>43068542
Ofolrodi isn't even finished is it? You're pretty much done anyway

>>43068542
>the anon who told me Utaan was really good
He didn't. He just said it's an acceptable stopping point.

>>43068542
>I'm going to go sulk and seethe before I finally get around to reading The Immortal Game instead.
Nice, maybe I'll reread it

>>43068607
Book club when?

>>43068598
https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/42848680/#q42857074
>>43068551
I'd read that nothing much happens in at least a third of Ofolrodi anyway, and some things sound just as disappointing to me as it was to that anon. The Dark Side doesn't seem as alien as every other fic up to this point made it out to be either, which is a big shame.

>>43068498
It was a long time ago. In fact I think I first read it and then dropped it while it was still being published. I cannot know for certain since I don’t remember clearly but I’m fairly sure I got board of it and didn’t like the direction of the plot and ended up happening to drop it there.

File: IMG_3846.jpg (121.8 KB)

121.8 KB JPG

You think there will be any record of this general in a thousand years?

>>43068727
I think that's 100% predicated on whether there will generally be any surviving large-scale archives from today's internet. If yes, there's a very good chance that some of the many various archives, personal stashes, etc. or something makes its way there. But 1000 years is a long time, and our current digital storage media are all very fragile in the long term, so it would take just a single civilisation upheaval where people forget to maintain their data stashes for a generation or two and everything could very easily get lost. Assuming civilisation itself doesn't just die off.

>>43068615
Several years ago

>>43068727
Only the collected works of Bleedin' will outlast humanity.

>>43068759
>future historians won't be able to tell apart real writing from AIslop from the same time period
>there is a real chance some AIslop is going to be taught at schools at some point, especially if the context and data of its existence is largely lost

>>43068776
If modern records survive with any continuity, I don't see why LLMs would confuse anyone in the future. If modern records are mostly lost, I doubt any LLM writing has any likelihood of surviving.

>>43068727
if historians decide to link >us with the 2016 election then this site's existence might end up as a historical footnote, that's the only shot 4chan has at ever being mentioned after 2100, it's also a gigantic if and it wouldn't even include this board if it happened
now, would the archives themselves still exist? mayyybe? just like bumcestershire's polo club 1880 stats records and trebizond's 950 grain tax records, the entirety of /mlp/ may be one day stored in a giant (probably digital) library along with a million other websites like it but it won't mean anything to anyone

>>43069132
Mogged by a Sumerian merchant I'm afraid.

>>43069132
Some screencaps of a few threads will survive in one schizo's heavy duty Hard Drive, and future anthropologists will extrapolate and try to reconstruct society based on those.

>>43068759
>Assuming civilization itself doesn't just die off.
Civilization can’t die at this point unless something really bad happens like a large asteroid hitting the planet or a genetically engineered virus killing our entire species.
>>43069132
You are ingnornt of the realities of the societal evolution happening around you.

>>43069278
Depends what you mean by civilisation. Modern infrastructure is extremely inter-reliant and deeply, deeply unresilient against any kind of global catastrophe. Yeah sure as long as humans don't go extinct we'll rebuild, and some knowledge will always survive even the worst non-extinction apocalyptic events, so we'd probably rebuild faster than the first time around too. But usually when people they say civilisation, they draw lines between major peaks of advancements separated by major downfalls. Ancient egyptian civlisation ended, ancient greek civilisation ended, ancient babylonian civilisation ended etc., even though some of them might have claim to a lineage and transfer of either population or knowledge all the way into modernity to some degree.

>>43068542
>pointless, annoying, and abysmal read
>by the same guy who wrote Background Pony
Say it ain't so.

>>43069278
go on then faggot, elaborate on how the future's gonna regard /mlp/, since you're the omniscient one

>>43068542
I'm that anon and I forgot about the second half lmao. I don't think it's an entire half is it? But yeah once she gets to the actual dragon, kills her and from there on it's kinda meh. But I remember that as just being the final bits of the fic, and most stuff before that being good.

My point in >>42857074 was that ditching the airship gives the story a breath of fresh air. The entire arc past the ocean crossing was much better than the stuff immediately preceding it, and Utaan is my favourite insofar as rather the first bits of it are my favourite, with Dash making her way through the new continent at first and also the Barges.

Basically my experience with easthorse was roughly
>Austraeoh: very cool and good adventure start to finish
>Ledomare 1st half: wtf is this shit
>Ledomare once Dash wakes up and things get going a bit: pretty cool
>Ledomare again: still cool
>Ledomare just keeps going: alright how long is Rainbow going to be stuck in ONE country after crossing like a dozen during the first book
>Ledomare finally ends after three books: finally more fresh stuff
>random travels on the airship: mostly cool
>stuff happens that I don't even remember: not very memorable, I have vague recollections of metal mare gay sex but I don't remember half the circumstances
>going into the deer country: I'm starting to get tired of the autistic airship crew
>the entirety of Val Roa: I don't fucking care get me out of here
>the desert and the ocean: cool we're getting philosophical now
>the tropical islands: finally a good fucking setting and some good fucking plot after like the last 1M being whatever
>all the shit with the nothing-ever-happens monks, the barges, Rainbow making her way up the start of the continent and gathering her allies for the big dragon fight: the best shit since Austraeoh
>the escape to the far side after the dragon's death: meh it's whatever

Really the first few books are held back by Ledomare just taking five million years to resolve, and then the airship crew just overstaying their welcome. Ynanhluutr and the start of Utaan are unironically Austraeoh-tier for me.

The one disclaimer worth mentioning is that I read this shit like 8 years ago so this is just how I remember experiencing it.

>>43068542
>>43069488
It's the last third of Utaan, not the second half.

>>43069302
>Ancient egyptian civlisation ended
There's more time between the pyramids being built and Cleopatra dying than between her and now. They were around awhile.

>>43069488
>>43069497
>I don't think it's an entire half is it?
>It's the last third of Utaan, not the second half.
No it's definitely the second half. The drama with the Right Talon, the Council, and Chandler were great. Fucking awesome even, especially when Verlax says hello and things go to shit. But the moment Dash and the Herald leave Wyvern Point made it feel like a slog, especially with the god awful dialogue between them, excluding Mortuana and Remna for good reason.

>going into the deer country
Skirts's insistence on Ebon and Eagle Eye dicking each other was insufferable. I had to eventually skip every scene where they're alone together.
>the entirety of Val Roa
Chrysalis was such a fucking disappointment beyond the bore that was trying to find out who she was impersonating. The goblin scenes were a great contrast.
>the tropical islands
These were pretty cool. Dash running from Twiggie was a good mix of nice and tragic but the Nealend arc went on a bit too long imo.
I didn't and still don't mind Ledomare taking as long as it did. If Skirts actually had a few editors like he should've had from the start, it would've been cut down massively while still retaining The Feels™ it gave off. Hell, I could think of rereading it all until the end of Odrsjot and get hard from the idea.

>Imagine reading millions of words while knowing you will be cucked by the story being abandoned

>>43069578
i was about to agree but then remembered that i just read asoiaf last year

https://www.fimfiction.net/story/291812/sunset-reset
>sunset freaks out
>she cries
>sunset freaks out
>she cries
>sunset freaks out
>she cries
10/10 storytelling would read again. I got suckered in because of the premise but it was nothing but a dramaslop

Put out a new chapter for the Jojo fic: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/572525/jojos-bizarre-adventure-friendship-is-magic

This was something I started as a green. Since Jojo threads don't seem to get made anymore I guess I'll annoy people by self-promoting here.

>>43069766
Hell, yeah. My kind of slop.
>Jotaro
It's not gonna be Part 3 wankery, is it?

File: IMG_3281.jpg (27.7 KB)

27.7 KB JPG

>>43069700
You suggest that the fic is essentially slightly under 400,000 words of female hysteria and women moment.
Do you hate yourself or something?

Favorite fics centered on Chrysalis? Romance, comedy, whatever.

File: old sketchy flier.jpg (114.7 KB)

114.7 KB JPG

>>43069926
>another post asking to be recommended Stickbug
Stickbug, yes.

File: 572672857523.png (1.4 MB)

1.4 MB PNG

>>43069933
I have an ADDICTION and I need my FIX

>>43069926
I haven't read many, but https://www.fimfiction.net/story/223997/a-good-princess is good and https://www.fimfiction.net/story/206017/queen-of-queens is phenomenal

>>43069912
No, he likes women. Personally, I don't think this thread should tolerate that kind of degeneracy.

>>43069578
I plan to read the entirely of easthorse later this year fully knowing this.

>>43069926
I really liked this one
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/301126/coming-home

File: Sparkles and champagne.jpg (59.4 KB)

59.4 KB JPG

Could I get some feedback on this? It's the prologue to a story about Vinyl Scratch going to Las Pegasus to perform a concert.
https://ponepaste.org/11787
I figured I should ask here before coldposting it over there.

>>43070109
Some phrases are weird, like:
>the first rays of sunlight interacted directly
>A black wooden table in the center had been pierced in the head of a blue stallion
>Seems to be a recurring theme.
There are comma splices, like:
>It led to an elevator, its gate had been dented inward in the shape of a hoof.
And commas where there shouldn't be any, like:
>Moscow, stared blankly at her
Sometimes you slip into present tense:
>She closes her eyes, and after a deep sigh, she blinks twice.
And it's "haphazard", not "hap-hazard".

I would restructure. You spend quite a while describing the scene before introducing Moscow. I think the effect you want is for the reader to see the dead, motionless detritus of last night's party. For me, it's not working; it takes too long and gets boring. I recommend putting Moscow's introduction closer to the start. You can keep all the description, but introducing him early gives an effect like him taking in the scene:
>Moscow walked out of the elevator.
>A black wooden table had pierced the head of a blue stallion lying face down...
>For Moscow, this was another day on the job. Another mess to clean up...
>None of the guests were breathing. A mix of empty glass bottles, glass shards, pills of varying colours and shapes...
>A noise broke the silence in the normally-quiet hallway floor...
Giving the reader a character to follow tends to be more engaging than just describing a scene.

One thing that definitely works is that you clearly establish that there is interesting action going on. You have a hook, which is more than a lot of stories manage. That's a good sign.

>review https://www.fimfiction.net/story/47589/the-many-secret-origins-of-scootaloo
"The Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo" is a 2012 comedy fic where Twilight listens to various characters' outlandish versions of where Scootaloo came from.

First of all, I don't think this fic was meant to be read in one go. It's basically an episodic sitcom: very formulaic. Every chapter, Twilight gets ambushed by a character who tells her a nonsensical story (largely unrelated to Scootaloo, who is usually just tacked on at the end), followed by Twilight freaking out about how stupid the story was. A couple of chapters deviate slightly, but not too much.

With this in mind, I think the intended reading experience was to log on to FF, check the new chapter to see what crazy story Twilight has to endure this time, comment "WTF LMAO XD", and move on with your day. When you binge the story instead, it becomes glaringly obvious how much it overstays its welcome.

Oh, right. The story is 68k words.

The premise sounds like something you could plausibly do in an episode of the show. Except it would probably be only 3 stories (or 4 with Scootaloo's real story in the end). The actual fic has 24..

Episodic sitcoms tend to jump the shark, and this fic most definitely did at some point. When I read the first few chapters, it was pretty funny. After that, a little less so, but still showing promise. By the time I got to the 10th chapter, I was wondering why I'm still reading this.

The story was promoted as a "parody anthology". It started off parodying specific genres or general concepts. But at some point, the author clearly ran out of ideas, and it began to parody specific pop culture works. Think of a piece of millenial culture that was a meme around that time, chances are, the story references it at some point. Not to mention fandom memes, naturally. Can you guess what Lyra's chapter is about? Would you be surprised to find out Dr Whooves gets several chapters?

(1/2)

>>43070284
Odd coincidence I noticed: the more references a chapter contains, the less funny it usually is. But this was 2012, when random references were considered the peak of humor by many, so what can you do.

Just as an example of what to expect from this story: the author himself is an actual character, and at one point, him, Discord, and Deadpool come together to sing a rendition of "Call Me Maybe". Yeah, it's that kind of fic.

Surprisingly, the fic sort of redeems itself by the last few chapters, where you can even begin to spot actual jokes again. One of my favorites was a late chapter parodying Prince of Bel-Air, except it's told by Rarity. The author did try to experiment slightly with the premise, even if he ultimately never veered too far away from the formula. So I can't say this fic goes to shit completely, but there is a long middle portion of really unfunny and uninspired chapters that make up about 60% of the story.

The thing is, I can totally see myself enjoying this story if I read it as a dumb teen back when it was coming out. I would've probably thought every obnoxious reference and randumb joke was really clever and hilarious. And today, that alternate version of me would look back on this story with fond nostalgia, but acknowledge that it has not aged well. Alas, this version of me read the story as a jaded adult, so I can only confidently claim the latter part.

If you're feeling really nostalgic for some retarded 2012 memes, you can read this I suppose. Or you could read a 2012 fic that's nostalgic and actually consistently good.

(2/2)

>>43070284
Kinda reminds me of a fic from that era where Scoots dies at the end each episode of the show. Don’t remember anything about it except she died in S1E2 by the roof falling on her.

>>43069700
This guy has been on my radar for a while, even though he's pretty much inactive now. He's definitely quite autistic because a good chunk of his stories seem like unhinged fix fics where he complains about whatever episode of the show raped him this week. But he also wrote an alicorn Rainbow Dash story that didn't suck complete ass and had some genuine cool elements to it.

You know, what the hell, I'm nominating this shit for the club https://www.fimfiction.net/story/163771/not-another-alicorn

Anyway, I was going to check out his alicorn Sunset stories at some point (still am). Care to give a more detailed rundown on the dramaslop?

>>43070300
Thought you were talking about Alicorn for a second, which went on hiatus years ago and just recently updated, doing a 180 on how stupid the characters were acting.

Any Sunburst fics?

>>43068727
Maybe. Don't forget: We've had a book printed that will, when stored properly, outlive all of us. It's entirely possible for copies of that printed anthology to be the one record that we ever existed, in the long run. What a legacy, I wonder what future man would think about my descriptions of Queen Chrysalis without any accompanying images. Now I wonder whether ancient man—or perhaps the better question would be how many ancient men—masturbated to thoughts of creatures like the sphinx.

>>43068759
This is why I take pains to propagate archives like the Fimfarchive torrent. Several of my shorter stories are also included in the descriptions of their associated artwork on the boorus, so they'll survive in any complete archives thereof; I make sure my stuff is properly stored on Derpibooru, Twibooru, Ponybooru, and Ponerpics for this reason.

>>43068776
That's more horrific than oblivion, thanks.

>>43068795
Thanks also for this good counterpoint.

>>43070588
>claims to value preservation
>is on staff at the most anti-archival controlled opposition booru in pony history
Verification is not required. An explanation is, however.

>>43070588
>Fimfarchive
accepts takedown requests. I wish someone would make a real archive (not me though)

>>43070685
elaborate

>>43070704
>a real archive
https://foalfetch.net
>elaborate
>DNPs encouraged
>admins consistently nuking any images they personally don't want public
>has users deliberately polluting other boorus with worse quality versions of pb uploads
The only reason Zizzy hasn't been lynched by /mlp/ is that he runs TPA and nobody has bothered mirroring it yet.

>>43070724
ok now I know you're talking about zizzy because you gave zero context previously
elaborate why you're bringing up zizzy in response to rarifag's post. I genuinely thought you were talking about fimfarchive first (even though you mentioned booru)

>>43070732
https://ponybooru.org/staff
Use your scrollwheel.

>>43070685
>Verification is not required. An explanation is, however.
I know Evan555alpha and asked for mass tagging privileges. That was the result. I should request them on Twibooru and Ponerpics sometime.

>>43070752
Even though you only bother tagging your fetish, you're still lending legitimacy to a worse version of Derpi. Being staff signals endorsement of policy. You can’t publicly posture about preservation while lending your name and labor to a platform that enforces DNPs and arbitrarily deletes content.

>>43070790
>all well meaning people should immediately and fully disassociate themselves with anything that has any slightly bad element
That's why things rot, you imbecile.

>>43070808
I wasn't aware Ponybooru had non-bad elements. Please, enlighten me.

>>43070813
It has ponies.

>>43070816
So does Manebooru. When are you signing up?

Why are you writers so fat and your hair so black? Yet you're emotional like a 14 year old girl despite your big size and ugly face?
I guess your visage is a reflection of your writing.

You should be writing about criminals and "muh society" considering what you look like.
I think you'd write a great novel about being an opportunistic emotional loser that gets talked into and manipulated by people tougher, uglier, bigger than you to do bad things since you're so emotional.

>>43070813
Ponybooru is decidedly and trully average. It's not great for archiving but it is not particularly hostile to anyone else either. I don't personally use it but I see zero reason to go on a massive crusade against it.

The real issue is that alt-boorus still don't have any kind of tag syncing mechanism so if you fix the tags on one booru the three others will still be out of date. That's a problem for every single one of them.

>>43070286
>Odd coincidence I noticed: the more references a chapter contains, the less funny it usually is.
That's not odd at all, in fact it is to be expected.

File: 1635634295280.jpg (44.4 KB)

44.4 KB JPG

>>43070822
>Why are you writers so fat and your hair so black?
that's not how writers look though

>>43070491
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/458628/for-better-or-for-worse

>>43071094
Oh nice one, I was just about to rec this one. Very sweet fic

>>43071310
That's my wife!

File: file.png (130.9 KB)

130.9 KB PNG

>>43069960
So, how many of these have you read?

File: omvy-1763737590-326380-full.jpg (302.1 KB)

302.1 KB JPG

>>43071335
And who are you, to presume matrimony to the moon?

>>43071521
Nta but since you asked
>The Bug in The Cave
Dropped
>Princess Celestia: The Changeling Queen
Not read
>Changeling Heart and the New Moon
Not read
>Trouble in Tiatarta
Read
>Queen Chrysalis Reforms (Accidentally)
Read
>Integration
Not read
>Hard Reset
Not read
>A Bug on a Stick
Read
>A New Way
Not read
>Fallout: Equestria - The Chrysalis
Not read
>Expanded Apotheverse
Dropped

File: 2807526.jpg (201.8 KB)

201.8 KB JPG

https://www.fimfiction.net/story/588277/all-powerful-garbage-baby

Got another story out. I like Celestia being not the best mom.

are your criteria for favoriteing a fic more stringent than upvoting it? and if so, do you also keep a seperate shelf for all the fics you've upvoted/all the fics you've upvoted but not favorited?

>>43071974
I don't really do favorites but if a fic makes me cry or a fic does what I would have done if I was writing that fic I upvote it.

File: striated night.jpg (3.5 MB)

3.5 MB JPG

>>43071974
5/5 goes in the star shelf. 4/5 goes in the Liked shelf. The rest goes into Read: 3/5 might be upvoted; 2/5 often downvoted, 1/5 always downvoted.
Rarely, I feel like I could get a little more benefit from having a downvoted bookshelf that I could put into searches as a filter, but it's barely any more useful in that regard than the Read shelf already is.

File: mfg4-1432571275-197090-full.jpg (167.6 KB)

167.6 KB JPG

I tried reading Celestia's Relaxing Vacation but went to skimming, to just skipping to the end. I'm sure there is more depraved fiction out there (That furry text based game where an AI keeps the last bit of humanity alive in a furry rape simulator comes to mind) but this was straight up an evil thing to write. Especially because it's 400,000 words long and depicts nothing but the most violent rape and grotesque tortures out there. Anyways, my only question I have for those who actually managed to finish it is: Did Celestia deserve eternal punishment? I looked it up and it seems that she only went insane because of Chrysalis's spell which worked too well. Meaning she literally wasn't in control or could stop, unless I'm wrong. Also, it's the souls of all her victims that eternally torment her, meaning they themselves can't ever truly move on even though they don't have a real sense of self at that point.

It's funny that cupcakes is treated like the worst thing the fandom ever made while this shit is just casually sitting on Fimfiction, lol.

>>43071974
I just favorite the ones I like the most. And they are all liked.

>>43071974
I favourite stories I really like, it's that simple. From what I can tell, it's quite common to favourite a story without giving it a thumbs up, even though I'd expect the opposite.

>>43072107
>I tried reading Celestia's Relaxing Vacation
You're braver than I am.

>>43072107
>>43072480
Can an anon request a snippet of what could be the tamest of depraved tortures featured in this fic? For science's sake, obviously.

>>43072547
I made it like 5 chapters before giving up and looked up other stuff. Celestia threatened to brutally torture Twilight (Something she does anyways) unless Spike has intercourse with Rarity's corpse. Celestia then proceeds to force Spike into Rarity's vagina and womb (magic boosted the elasticity of both of these) and smashes him to death with her own magically summoned futa dick as she rapes Rarity's corpse as well. Yes, this is literally one of the more tamer tortures from what I heard comes later. Oh, and Rarity's soul, along with MANY others, are trapped within Celestia and fuels her magic powers for years.

Why aren't you guys using AI to bring fanfics to life?

>>43072573
Because AI forgets its own plot after several hundred tokens and likes to hallucinate pointless details.

>>43072107
>CRV
Wew I remember like... bits and pieces of it. When I first read it years back after someone mentioned it on /mlp/, it was super gross, definitely doesn't inspire a desire to re-read but just from what I can remember it's just so ridiculously over the top. Stuff like
>Applejack having to kill Mac by I think trying to snap his neck via kicking (and not taking him out on the first attempt)
>Celestia cooking AJ alive by having her stand in a pot(?) and slowly filling it with boiling oil
>The Spa twins being tied together in a bath and not able to stay above water without dragging the other under (with one of the twins defecating from sheer stress because of course)
>Spike being forced to assault Rarity's corpse(?)
I never finished it (or even made it that far in) so I can't comment on the plot stuff, sorry.

>>43072547
I remember Voiceguy made a reading of the story summary that was 30 minutes long.
I can't seem to find it, but you should do the same and just read the synopsis. It's a journey.

File: 20141217.png (584.3 KB)

584.3 KB PNG

>>43072573
I'm better than that. Writing out your thoughts is a skill just like many others, not even a difficult one, and will atrophy without use. You should never let a machine take the words out of your mouth, or let it try.

Search engines are already geared towards retards who can't even spell, and I can imagine the same thing happening with these chatbots, if they don't implode in the next few years after the funding dries up and the investors commit suicide that is. Already I'm seeing people who use proper grammar and punctuation asked "why they write like AI" and it's horrifying. Oh well, it's not the worst plague Sam's people have unleashed on the world, nor is it likely to be the last.

>>43071974
The threshold for a like is simply being better than average, so >5/10. Earning a dislike is much harder; the story needs to do something truly awful without justifying that choice.
Favorites gathers fics I'd like to revisit some day for being excellent, generally from 8/10 up. Some flawed stories can get there with a 7/10. I also have a second "read" bookshelf for everything other than the favorites.

File: 575727762762.png (1.8 KB)

1.8 KB PNG

>>43072572
Holy hell I feel bad for laughing at the absurdity of it.

>>43072107
2nd club when?

>>43072595
>>
How the hell does that even happen?

>>43072671
I miss the secreter club.
I can't believe Austraeoh killed it.

>>43072672
I have not a single idea. I believe I wrote my reply, changed the post I was going to reply to, but then changed it back? Thought I caught all cases of it because it happened to all of the >. Might've just fat-fingered something in the interim.

>>43072573
AI slop is objectively terrible. You can identify AI fics easily just by reading them: They're a stream of vivid but irrelevant details. They're technically fiction, but an 8 year old can write a better story. That's not an exaggeration: An 8 year old relative of mine wrote a story that I found more compelling than AI slop. It wasn't even a good story (because it was written by A LITERAL 8 YEAR OLD) but AI slop is even worse.

It looks to me like Fimfiction doesn't care, though. AI slop is technically against the rules, but they do nothing unless the author admits it openly.

>>43072705
>but they do nothing unless the author admits it openly.
Well I mean, the moderators aren't looking for it actively or anything.

>>43072705
>They're a stream of vivid but irrelevant details.
I got access to a beta of a supposed story-writing AI (because most of these LLMs aren't built to write narratives to begin with), fed it some of my own text, and tried it out out of curiosity and god, it does this so much. It was annoying. Mention a character is magic and vaguely irreverent and they will constantly be pulling a magical dagger out of the air every other line. In a vacuum an individual sentence or two might sound good, but altogether it was a fucking mess, to say nothing of the fact that it constantly would forget simple established details like where a character was standing or if they were holding like, an orange or if they had thrown it over their shoulder.

I had to steer it and write so much of it myself that it made the entire thing pointless. The best it could do was translate the words I wrote into a scottish brogue. I could see why an actual moron would like it, because those aforementioned words in a vacuum sound good to anyone not paying attention.

>>43072107
>That furry text based game where an AI keeps the last bit of humanity alive in a furry rape simulator comes to mind
Who told you IHNMaIMS was furry

Sure do love that every other new fic is a fucking zebradom clopfic. Just absolutely love that.

>>43072824
I know at least three people reported https://www.fimfiction.net/story/573054/sorry-but-your-princess-is-in-another-castle-i-meant-dimension (the AI story that PaulAsaran reviewed) over a week ago. I reported https://www.fimfiction.net/story/588078/my-mentor-has-a-special-somepony at almost the same time. They're both obviously AI and both still up. The only conclusion I can draw is that the mods don't care.

>>43072836
The mods don't pay attention outside of Perph IIRC.

>>43072836
Submissions for the Zebradom contest are due tomorrow. Expect a bunch of last-minute shit, and then it'll all be gone on Sunday.

>>43072840
Eldorado claims to be opposed to AI. But I don't know if he does anything about it.

>>43072841
Intended for >>43072835

File: borsalino lulz.jpg (60.9 KB)

60.9 KB JPG

>>43072841
>most vocal participant in the SHITTED contest has a communist flag in his profile pic

>>43072841
>and then it'll all be gone on Sunday.
were it so easy
>>43072854
kek

>>43070284
>how much it overstays its welcome
That's just a feature of all comedy fics that stray north of about 45k. It's the classic fanfic curse. Either a story's too long and bloated and doesn't know when to end, or its too short and fast-paced and never fully explores its premise.

>>43070588
>how many ancient men
I can't imagine fetishes were much of a thing prior to the invention of the printing press due to how expensive media was to create and how much of the population was illiterate. Though it is funny to think of some Library of Alexandria scholar trying to find a secluded dark spot where he can finally fap to Hesiod's Medusa fic, only to knock the candle over and start the fire.

>>43071974
Favoriting's reserved for truly great fics that stick in my mind. Likes are just "that was pretty good". I'm still mad Knighty merged Tracking and Favorites back in the day because it polluted the whole thing and means anything from 2012-2014 is tainted. I don't have a separate shelf for just likes, but do have one for everything I've read.

>>43072107
>Did Celestia deserve eternal punishment?
It's a snuff fic, so of course even the perpetrator is ultimately an innocent victim doomed to sadism and torture.

>while this shit is just casually sitting on Fimfiction
Cupcakes both came from a more innocent time before the degeneracy really kicked off and was also formatted as a shock fic, where it starts as a PinkieDash SoL shipping oneshot about baking before hitting the twist. CRV never hides what is.

>>43072573
Because writing is fun. If you mean art or animation, AI still really sucks at doing that well and getting the fine details right.

>>43072861
>fetishes
You don't need a printing press, though. You just need exposure to the fetish and degeneracy. If you've ever heard the story of the Sphinx, then it's possible to fap to it.
>only to knock the candle over and start the fire
kek

>>43072834
No not that. That story is disturbing but not depraved and sick like other stuff.
Fuck, I forget what it's called. It's a game where the AI is called Mint or Mynt or something. like a thousand or so humans got uploaded to a simulation after a meteor strikes earth where they can't do anything other than fuck, so naturally the world is horribly degenerate.

>>43072891
paraphore

>>43072891
>horribly degenerate
Just stick to the Bright Forest if you can't handle the stronger stuff.

>>43072891
I thought most of the degenerative stuff was honestly mediocre. But I did like some bits of it.
Like the player being some random kid who discovered this thing during the apocalypse and the AI being actually worried when told that their parents went outside and never came back and that the apocalypse was currently happening.

Oh also the AI's creator going "what the fuck is wrong with you" in response to the AI snuffing a baby.

>>43070987
I know, I was being facetious. It was more apparent before I split the post.

>>43072107
But the real question is, is it better than 120 Days of Blueblood?

>>43073062
Even the forest has scat, snuff, and cub. Calling it vanilla is very misleading.

>>43072861
>I can't imagine fetishes were much of a thing prior to the invention of the printing press
Sailors had dirty songs.
I imagine singing lewd stuff, or short erotic poems would be the easiest way to share porn when you didn't have writers and painters churning out erotica every day.

File: a lass of myth and lore.png (535.7 KB)

535.7 KB PNG

>>43073342
I now desire horseshanties.

File: IMG_6249.jpg (99 KB)

99 KB JPG

>>43072861
>I can't imagine fetishes were much of a thing prior to the invention of the printing press
People had them, though they obviously didn’t convey that, and they would not have been as prevalent or as numerous as they are now.

>>43073358
What will we do with a horsewords author?
What will we do with a horsewords author?
What will we do with a horsewords author?
Late into the evening!

>>43073442
Make him read a porn isekai!
Make him read a porn isekai!
Make him read a porn isekai!
One that's romance centric!

>>43073455
Slog him through a hundred com'dies!
Slog him through a hundred com'dies!
Slog him through a hundred com'dies!
That aren't really funny.

>>43073469
Write a fic with a Mane Six harem,
Write a fic with a Mane Six harem,
Write a fic with a Mane Six harem,
And an OC alicorn!

>>43073492
Search and replace on "everybody",
Search and replace on "everybody",
Search and replace on "everybody",
Don't forget to say "hooves"!

>>43073497
Never start incomplete stories!
Never start incomplete stories!
Never start incomplete stories!
The'yre hardly worth it!

>>43073516
Force him to think up lines for this song!
Force him to think up lines for this song!
Force him to think up lines for this song!
They're not even clever!

Alright, someone record it.

>>43073826
>>43074074
It's over...

>>43074076
It's Lunarover

>>43074080
It's Lunover...

>>43074081
Mock Lunafag until he fucks off,
Mock Lunafag until he fucks off,
Mock Lunafag until he fucks off,
Goes away forever!

https://www.fimfiction.net/story/2323/backwards-through-the-mirror
Anypony read this? I like it. Shame it's incomplete..

>>43072861
>I can't imagine fetishes were much of a thing prior to the invention of the printing press
Anon why do you think most of the egyptian gods are humans with animal heads

>>43074590
Women give birth on their backs because a French king liked to watch

File: 17472847012.png (316 KB)

316 KB PNG

>reading Immortal Game
>listening to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJoYBw5tJOc
>See picrel
>immediate chills
I'm liking it so far. The combat scenes with the Mane Six read weirdly to me and Luna's Elizabethan is the worst I've seen in any fic, but the ideas and concepts presented have reeled me in like an anon to Dashie's smelly fucking wingpits. I would kill SO many ponies for King Titan, fuck you.

>>43074850
I always forget about the pictures

>>43074850
Are you a bottom femboy with a fetish for big daddy dictators

>>43074850
>I would kill SO many ponies for King Titan, fuck you.
t. General Esteem. Seriously, how did the guy become a captain in normal Equestria?

>>43072861
>I can't imagine fetishes were much of a thing prior to the invention of the printing press due to how expensive media was to create and how much of the population was illiterate.
I'm reminded of what I read about some American military commander from, I believe, the 1800s. He was known for going through women, and there were accounts he'd even had a pregnant woman with him during one of his train rides.

Anyway, I've got to disagree. Fetishes are certainly more extreme nowadays, but I'd argue they've always been there. Pregnancy is an easy one to see, even feet were probably a pretty early one.

>Though it is funny to think of some Library of Alexandria scholar trying to find a secluded dark spot where he can finally fap to Hesiod's Medusa fic, only to knock the candle over and start the fire.
kek

>>43074805
This is new to me, but double kek.

File: pic not unrelated.png (11 KB)

11 KB PNG

For reasons that are entirely my fault, I may be late with my bookclub post today. If I see that it'll be delayed by more than 30 minutes, I'll make the anchor on time anyway.

>>43075437
I would have called you out in the chat had I known sooner.

>>43075437
>I'm actually awake right now
Serves me right.

>>43075696
Give me like 10 minutes.

File: 1535904758798.jpg (532.8 KB)

532.8 KB JPG

Reading a fixfic, in
>/FSBC/

I somehow hadn't realized until I was almost done with it.
There's a lot to like here. First of all, if you like batponies, you absolutely need to read this. This is one of the better batfag fics on the site, in terms of characterizing them, giving them a reason to exist, and integrating them into Equestria without veering into the AU land. Right, that's another great thing about this story! It's a very pony fic, and it manages to tell a "serious" story without coming off as juvenile. Honestly, one of the better examples of remaining true to the show while telling a very good, dramatic story. At the end of the end, I suppose it's partially subjective, but no part of it felt like it was over the line for a "pony" story, and yet that didn't diminish it at all. If anything, it actually made it a lot better! I probably should've said this earlier, but the conflict at the core of the fic is great. At first I had some doubts about Sky Diamond and choosing him as the PoV character, but as I read more of it, I was sold on this decision.

Thirdly, the worldbuilding involved (there's a lot!) and the characterization of the Sisters is also top-notch. This is how I want the immediate post-banishment NMM to read.
I called it a fixfic in the opening because it does also explain the events of episode 2 without disrespecting or retconning the show. In an alternative timeline, I could see Hasbro releasing this as some sort of supplemental material aimed at older audiences or something, and /mlp/ would take all of it as core canon right away.
Oh, and I have nowhere better to say this: The technical writing here is good, too! It doesn't try to be clever, but it's very solid, good even! That's already so much better than what we usually get.

Yet, I have two gripes with this fic. They didn't ruin the fic for me, but they are definitely there. First is the pacing. To be blunt, the fic is too long. The first 50% of it is really, really good. The second part also has very good moments, but it starts feeling slightly unfocused, perhaps bloated. Did the combat scene really need to be this long? I mean, it's written pretty well, but that was not what the story was about. The episode 2 "challenges", of course, needed to be included, but they delay the finale of the story—the finale that The Readers, We, already know. Seems like the author was aware of this, too, seeing how the last three are rushed through.
The other issue is much smaller, but I did not care at all for the dumb "Let's fly to the castle!" references in one of the more emotional moments of the fic. Holy hell, why? I mean, to give the author credit, he actually makes them fit there as well as he possibly could have—but the decision to include them undermined the moment.

In the end, I like the fic quite a lot, but I am pretty much exactly the target audience, so YMMV. It's a good story, especially for how it does its "ponyness" in a more serious fic.
Voting next post.

File: 1683896395542.jpg (252.9 KB)

252.9 KB JPG

>>43075718
[Voting]
To be honest, I have nothing special prepared, so here are some more titles, mostly from the 1-recs SK list:
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/3479/the-games-we-play
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/434003/the-archetypist
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/375944/one-white-unicorn
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/116344/foal-of-the-forest
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/301618/twilight-sparkle-and-the-cake-thief

But of course, write-in recs are also valid, etc., etc.

>>43075718
I liked it, it was a very fun read and I was kind of surprised at how short it was. Both the fic itself and the timeframe it covers which is just one (long) night. I also really liked the style of the beginning and the ending. Maybe my biggest complaint is that Nebula just sort of lore drops at one or two parts of the fic but she's telling Luna about the past 1,000 years of history and the fic only shows us a single night so I think a conversational lore dump was somewhat inevitable. Nebula is also a bit TOO nonchalant with 'Cee' I think. I did like her being forced out of the part of the fic though, it was appropriate since she was pretty much carrying it. And we get to see Sky Diamond's honesty pay off. Everything else I liked. Especially Nebula being incessant about being Luna's friend. The fact that Celestia kept them around and pretty much knew they would be more loyal to Luna (and even NMM) than her is also kino. Anyways
>batponies breed true
>Celestia's offer to make them into pegasus is always open
Weird that they have a way to essentially guarantee a pegasus child, I wonder if that has ever come up in universe since it's arguably the only way to guarantee a tribe. They would probably be somewhat popular in cloudsdale or at least among pegasus
>"That's the point. We don't belong to Celestia. Luna is our Princess. That's what Celestia is counting on."
kino
>"Even with her mind in tatters, she longed to see you."
kino
>"I used to tell her her wings were pretty..."
kinoooo, this scene was peak, maybe my favorite line of the fic
>Luna tells Sky Diamond to rape Belle Dancer
Holy fucking keeeeeeek
>absurdly long title drop
always kino when done seriously

>>43075718
>This is one of the better batfag fics on the site, in terms of characterizing them, giving them a reason to exist, and integrating them into Equestria without veering into the AU land.
Yeah, vesperquine fags stay winning with this one.
>It's a very pony fic
Very true, I didn't even realize enough to take a note but it absolutely does. No one gets killed and even the fighting among ponies makes sense and both sides are being reserved about it
> At first I had some doubts about Sky Diamond and choosing him as the PoV character, but as I read more of it, I was sold on this decision.
Yeah the fic does a good job with Nebula I think. Having her be with Sky (us) and guiding most of the story just to force her away for the climax was a good idea with good execution
>Did the combat scene really need to be this long? I mean, it's written pretty well, but that was not what the story was about.
That's a good point, it never really occured as a thought to me while reading that part, but having looked at the percentage of the fic before and after it did occur that it was a bit much for the fic and not really at all what the fic was about. Doubly so considering the fight ends, then just starts back up again lmao. It easily could've been half as long by not being two fights
>Seems like the author was aware of this, too, seeing how the last three are rushed through.
True as well

>>43074501
Nobody?
Every single time I post this nobody replies…

>>43075769
>Hiatus from 2013
wew

File: 1757786402374080.jpg (335.5 KB)

335.5 KB JPG

>>43075735
>the timeframe it covers which is just one (long) night
One day and one night, approximately.
>I also really liked the style of the beginning and the ending.
Absolutely, yeah! I didn't find the space to mention it in the post, but that opening scene with Celestia and Nebula was incredibly effective at selling me on the fic as well as presenting all of the main characters and the world, all without it ever reading like an infodump. And the ending is maybe slightly indulgent, but hey, if any fic gets to do the bit where it nudges you with the narrative "remember this? this is how it happened?", it should be a good S1E01/02 fic.
>Nebula is also a bit TOO nonchalant with 'Cee' I think.
I was surprised by this at first, but I can get it. She's confident, experienced, and Celestia appreciates it, too, so why shouldn't she act like this?
>essentially guarantee a pegasus child
Huh, I suppose so. Also, them maintaining such a small population despite 100% bat children means that either they keep to themselves a lot or die childless a lot more often than other ponies, which is a little disturbing if you think it's because of the racism they implied.
>They would probably be somewhat popular in cloudsdale
Don't forget that bats do not want to do this, most of the time. So rather than having 50% or 33% or whatever to have a pegasus foal, you probably have <10% to end with one with a batpony marefriend.
>kino
It was.

>>43075752
>both sides are being reserved about it
But without making it seem like a pillow fight, which is the other problem you can run into when trying too hard to make it "pony". And also NMM being a monster that's still a pony underneath adds a lot to this ponyness.
>the fight ends, then just starts back up again lmao.
That was the part that made me stare at it in disbelief. That 10 chapter is almost entirely the fight scene, and spending 25% of the fic on it was certainly a choice. I'd be complaining a lot more if the fight was bad, though.

>>43075794
>That 10 chapter
*10k words long chapter

>>43075718
I wonder if the author still lurks the thread. Though I think it would be hilarious if he stopped coming here just before we read his story.
Anyway, I really liked it. Most of it. I think it would be better to say I liked the middle 80% of the fic a lot. The start didn't really grab me. I liked Bubblebrains just fine, and Nebula is a fun lady. Maybe it was the pacing, or the way it was told, but I think the start is just fine.
And then NMM drops one of the pre-recorded likes from the first toy line and I laughed. It'll make the Tunerd happy to know the fic improves amazingly once Luna drops by.
You know, I find it kind of funny that when Nebula insisted on calling NMM Princess Luna, NMM could've easily started calling them pegasus. Really would've taken the wind out of her wings.
Anyway, I'm glad we locked into a parallel story of the Everfree Gauntlet rather than a retelling of it. Some nice conversations between Sky and Nebula, Nebula and NMM, and NMM and Sky.
It almost starts feeling a bit repetitive, but they're framed in such a way that it does feel like the two batties are making progress in breaking Luna out.
I didn't particularly care about the action scene with the Wonderbolts. It's not bad, I just wasn't as invested. They were alright.

>“I'd like to complain to the quartermaster about the quality of workmanship."
>“How did the tree turn out?”
>“Err, fine I guess.”
>“Then don't complain about your armor.”
ehehehe

Anyhoot. I liked it all right until the dream with Celestia, which was also really good. And then... The ending. After reading such a nice story, I feel robbed we got such a passive retelling of Luna's redemption and Pinkie's party. So close, yet I do feel it fumbled the end.
Oh, well. I still had an overall positive experience.
And just for the record, I think trying to incorporate those toys and their lines into the story was fun. And not just because I find blood funny.

>>43075725
Uh... Cake Thief.

>>43075735
>I also really liked the style of the beginning and the ending.
lmao
Well, I didn't hate it, but the start didn't grab me fast, and I didn't like the style of the ending at all. I would've really preferred a longer resolution, or at least not so detached. The Bolts fight lasted much more.
>Luna tells Sky Diamond to rape Belle Dancer
Oh, yeah. That happened. Good thing Luna didn't magic herself into a futa, or she would've made the night last forever for some Princest.
>Doubly so considering the fight ends, then just starts back up again lmao.
Maybe Tigerhorse really likes They Live.
>>43075794
>Absolutely, yeah!
Man, maybe I'm the odd one out...

I forgot to put it in my post but:
>NMM spliced a fruit bat instead of a vampire bat
Lmao, that's actually some top tier lore that is very pony and believable

>>43075794
>but that opening scene with Celestia and Nebula
I was more so talking about the few italicized paragraphs on both ends, but yeah that was a very nice way to introduce what was essentially 3 of the 4 characters in the fic
>Also, them maintaining such a small population despite 100% bat children means that either they keep to themselves a lot or die childless a lot more often than other ponies, which is a little disturbing if you think it's because of the racism they implied.
Yeah it reminded me of the fic where the batponies actually strictly regulate their own numbers and keep re-using names of the original batponies
>And also NMM being a monster that's still a pony underneath adds a lot to this ponyness.
I liked Sky thinking he saw her coat change color out of the corner of his eye a few times
>That 10 chapter is almost entirely the fight scene, and spending 25% of the fic on it was certainly a choice. I'd be complaining a lot more if the fight was bad, though.
Yeah, as I said, while reading it it was fine but thinking back on it it makes no sense.

>>43075825
>You know, I find it kind of funny that when Nebula insisted on calling NMM Princess Luna, NMM could've easily started calling them pegasus. Really would've taken the wind out of her wings.
That would've been hilarious, but Nebula would've silently accepted it. And it might've even made Sky more determined in Nebula's plan, but maybe not
>It almost starts feeling a bit repetitive, but they're framed in such a way that it does feel like the two batties are making progress in breaking Luna out.
I agree with this actually. When Nebula starts to talk about the past for the 2nd time, she dives into it almost word for word how she did the first time which was off-putting
>After reading such a nice story, I feel robbed we got such a passive retelling of Luna's redemption
And I kinda agree here. All of that happens just for him to hover in the rafters as the show plays itself out is a bit weak

How do I write porn? I mean appealing sexual interaction.

>>43075844
>Well, I didn't hate it, but the start didn't grab me fast, and I didn't like the style of the ending at all.
Again to be explicit, I was talking about the 5 or so italicized paragraphs at the start and end. But I don't have a problem with the beginning

>>43075866
Put peenor in vagoo.
Have the characters care about each other and show it through body language as they fuck.
The link in the OP has some neat tips you can include, as well.

File: IMG_5483.png (987.7 KB)

987.7 KB PNG

>>43075866
Anyone else notice that clopfics used to have a certain tropes that have to a large degree fell out of use in the past few years? No longer using a bunch of synonyms for pp and vageegee, no “winking”, no estrus, no wingboners, no ponies having unique smells and sexual fluid tastes, and a few other things I am forgetting or don’t know how to describe.

>inb4 how do you even know this coomer.

>>43075924
Truth be told, I hadn't noticed. I don't read that much porn, I prefer longer stories that weave sex into the narrative.

File: nmm smoke.png (1.5 MB)

1.5 MB PNG

>>43075718
>an bapfic.rtf
So, this whole story seems like a package to deliver the Night Fight chapter. It’s a good thing the set piece fight was good. The fight was really good, I enjoyed that the level of violence was almost E except Fleetfoot’s chokeout. It really felt like the Night Guard and Wonderbolts had respect for each other, and that both sides were holding back from it. The banter was all fun, too.
As for the rest of the story, it’s like the mirror image of Brothers and Sisters. In that fic, the characters sucked and the baplore was great. In this fic, the characters are great and the baplore was all but absent.
I enjoyed the way Sky Diamond was doubtful of himself and of NMM, I liked the way his clumsy lines to NMM reflected that, how they were contrasted with Nebula’s more confident and faithful lines.

In another contrast, Brothers and Sisters did not particularly stick to canon, and I found this fic’s slavish adherence to the Mare in the Moon timeline and events to be fairly tedious. At first, I was really hoping for a story about NMM’s redemption taking place in Canterlot. The sisters reunion was particularly bad: the way no baps appeared in S1 had the scene radiating the aura of a fat brony sweating on the sidelines of a con event with Nicole and Tabitha signing toys for children. Like he knows how tasteless it would be to have Sky present Luna to Celestia, but won’t fuck off, so the scene is recounted instead of timeskipped with Sky waking up in Ponyville General. It certainly doesn’t help that I also really dislike the scene in the show…

The two other things I didn't like were the "you're the worst of the lot, Cee" rant, in which Nebula was being unreasonably malicious and the stupid Cee nickname, and the toy references. Two pretty wings mentions would've been enough, all the rest of the tie-ins to the toy made the story worse.

>>43075924
>no “winking”
sad if true

>>43075924
Yeah but at least there's a massive amount of BBC stand-in porn. That's a good thing, right?

>>43075866
There is exactly one rule in pornography. (Like all rules, it can be broken, but if you're asking this question then you shouldn't be breaking it.) The rule is: The sex scene must be the first time these characters have done this act in this setting.

For example, here are some possible sex scenes that follow the rule:
>Bright Mac and Pear Butter have a good time on their wedding night.
(First time these characters have had sex.)
>Applejack and Rainbow Dash get drunk on hard cider. They confess a mutual attraction for each other and have sex for the first time.
(First time they've had sex with each other. Maybe the first time they've had sex at all.)
>After Flurry Heart's birth, Cadance is so distracted that she forgets to schedule sexytime with Shining Armor. Twilight Sparkle offers to help her brother out.
(First time these characters have had sex since Flurry Heart. Maybe the first time they've had sex since Shiny got married, and maybe the first time they've ever had sex.)
>Rainbow Dash's initiation into the Wonderbolts puts her at the center of an orgy.
(First time Rainbow Dash has had sex with the other Wonderbolts.)
>Rarity is stressed right before her fashion show starts, so, in a moment of inspiration, Pinkie Pie pulls her into a dressing room and fucks her.
(First time in this setting; they've never fucked before a fashion show.)
>Trixie takes Starlight Glimmer to a sex club, and Starlight discovers she loves being fucked in front of a crowd.
(First time in this setting, and possibly the first time Starlight has done some of these sex acts.)
>Fluttershy relieves a horny animal with a blowjob.
(First time she's done this act.)
>For Carrot Cake's birthday, Cup Cake offers him anal.
(First time they've done this act.)
>Luna is on the verge of turning into Nightmare Moon again, so Celestia teaches her to masturbate.
(First time she's done this act.)

Here are some possible sex scenes that don't follow the rule:
>After a hard day of farm work, Bright Mac and Pear Butter try to conceive again.
>Twilight Sparkle masturbates to her favorite erotic novel.
>Celestia summons a guard for another tour of bedroom duty.
>Angel Bunny rapes Fluttershy for the hundredth time.
>At the family reunion, the Apple family has its annual orgy
But even if a scene doesn't follow the rule, it's usually easy to modify it so that it does:
>Bright Mac and Pear Butter have to leave baby Big Mac in Granny's care while they sneak away to conceive Applejack.
>Twilight Sparkle masturbates to a new erotic novel.
>Celestia summons a new guard for a tour of bedroom duty.
>Angel Bunny rapes Fluttershy for the first time.
>Some young foals are now old enough to join the Apple family's annual orgy.

File: lulu.jpg (3.5 MB)

3.5 MB JPG

>>43075718
I totally agree on Sky Diamond being a good PoV character,
>This is one of the better batfag fics on the site, in terms of characterizing them, giving them a reason to exist, and integrating them into Equestria without veering into the AU land.
It really isn't, though. There are a lot of better bapfics. Even if you wrongfully discount AU land, and so also discount stories like Veil of Sleep, there are better batpony renderings like Brothers and Sisters, The Princess's Bit or even Method to his Madness. Batponies here are the shallowest "cursed pegasus that like staying up late and some of them like Luna" interpretations I've read. There's no secret society, no Hollow Shades, no conspiracies, no camaraderie to fend off the racism.

I do like how pony the fic is, though. Sadly, I don't think the show would've done better on this front than the fic did, if it ever had another batpony episode.

>>43075794
>I was surprised by this at first, but I can get it. She's confident, experienced, and Celestia appreciates it, too, so why shouldn't she act like this?
She shouldn't have gone so far. You can write it two ways: that commander Celestia appreciates honesty in her inner circle, and that guilt-ridden Celestia was just looking for somepony to hurt her. The author was going for the first, obviously, but the actual needles thrown by Nebula are those of the second. For the purpose of delivering lore, Nebula attacks Celestia by bringing things up that are not relevant to the conversation they were having, but just to hurt her.

>>43075825
I did like the Tuna tease, the imagery of NMM considering Twilight lugging a telescope around Canterlot.
>passive retelling
An active retelling would've been much worse. I don't know if the author could've pulled off a meeting with Luna and the Canterlot Night Guard post-Elements of Harmony, but if so, that would've been much more preferable to either Sky being involved with the sisters' scene or the lurking version we got.

>>43075845
>fruit bat
Yeah, that was one of the good bits.

>>43075718
>First of all, if you like batponies, you absolutely need to read this
That's me. Can you define "this" so I can go read it pls
The club review posts never ever mentioning the fic they're talking about makes them completely devoid of context when seeing them pop up in the thread every time

File: action swoosh.jpg (1.9 MB)

1.9 MB JPG

>>43076010
There is context: the OP says what the story is, and even links it: >>43061429 Her Soldiers, We
And there are significantly more batpony-loreful stories mentioned in >>43075988

File: IMG_5487.png (307.5 KB)

307.5 KB PNG

https://www.fimfiction.net/story/445461/your-family-and-you
Reading the recently uploaded chapter for this and it’s interesting to see how an authors writing can undergo little substantial positive evolution in 13 years.

>>43076010
>Had question answered by the OP
>didn’t read
You’ll fit right in here

>>43076055
It's a story about a human that got Twilight pregnant and you expected development?

>>43076164
Fetal development, at least.

>>43076190
Bruh that foal's gonna be coming out looking like the eraserhead baby but not as endearing.

File: IMG_5477.jpg (1.5 MB)

1.5 MB JPG

>>43076164
It is unfortunately about a lot more than that. And none of it is worth reading.

>>43076010
This is why the other club was better.

>>43075978
That's a lot of words to push your first time sex fetish. OP, don't listen to this guy, there are hundreds of upvoted clopfics that don't follow this.
>>43075924
People who used those tropes in their fanfics died or normied out and zoomers that came in their stead haven't read these fanfics.

>>43076019
>>43076093
Okay fair, but isn't the club a weekly thing? I didn't think it was threadly. If it's weekly then checking the OP isn't reliable.
Also I'll know to check it now but you can't blame me for not reading the entire OP pasta and not spotting that one specific section of it actually gets updated, without prior knowledge of this practice.

>Her Soldiers, We
Neat, I actually started reading it once, but the first chapter didn't necessarily click at first.
I actually have read none of the other fics mentioned in your post, tuna, so I'll check those out too, nice. Also a good excuse to finally read Method if it has good baps.

>>43075718
I don't have a lot to say about this week's fic. The description made it sound like it was going to be this intense drama about NMM coming back and mind-controlling the batpony guards, who would have to struggle against their own nature to save Luna. If I knew this was mostly going to be three characters flying around and talking, I probably wouldn't have read it.

Why ARE there only three characters, anyway? Well, the likely doylist explanation is that the author knew he couldn't manage more than that in a scene. Good for him for working around his drawbacks, but such a tiny cast (combined with adhering to the plot of the original two-parter) really gives the story this suffocating vibe of a low-scale filler spin-off where nothing really matters.

I like that the versperquines in this fic are fairly reasonable and loyal to Equestria, rather than fanatically devoted to NMM. The implications of them being cursed pegasi who just kinda Stockholm'd into liking it over generations, not so much.

This isn't the first fic I've read that frames 'batpony' as a slur. To me, this just seems like trying to create conflict out of thin air, and nothing is really done with it here, but I suppose it's not a big deal since these batponies aren't brooding edgelords in the first place.

Celestia mentally regressing for a while after NMM's defeat is a potentially neat headcanon. I'm not sure if it only exists to make a toy joke, but it can work as a justification for why some problems (like the out-of-touch nobility in the fic itself) were allowed to fester in Equestria without Celestia's interference.

(1/2)

File: batpony_s_secret_place_3__patreon_reward__by_yakovlev_vad_d9wsnar.png (3.9 MB)

3.9 MB PNG

>>43075725
Next up: TS and the Cake Thief!
>https://www.fimfiction.net/story/301618/twilight-sparkle-and-the-cake-thief
Week 1: Chapters 1 through 7 (for once they're named appropriately!).
Week 2: The rest.

>>43075825
>the middle 80% of the fic a lot
Interesting! I would say my enjoyment of the story was pretty even, except for near the ending and the fight in the middle. Although I see you're saying the action scene wasn't that great for you as well, so we're mostly aligned, the opening aside.
>toy line
I suppose it's something that either grabs you or it doesn't. They kind of ruined the immersion for me every time. How can you read that part and not be immediately ripped out of the story? It took me right out of Equestria and back to Earth, to the 'I' reading the fic.
>Some nice conversations
The highlight (and the point) of the fic, imo.
>And then... The ending
You know what? I agree. I thought it was weaker when I read it, but I gave it a pass for "it's a retelling; of course it has to keep the best scene of the show intact!". And I think I still stand by that, but it doesn't make for too satisfying an ending to the fic we're reading. The baps' influence was mentioned as part of the reason why she chose to take her second chance, but this should've been more emphasized.

>>43075844
>maybe I'm the odd one out...
I meant the opening. The ending is definitely worse than the rest.

>>43075845
>>NMM spliced a fruit bat
Yes, that was great!
>it makes no sense
I'm pretty sure the author wanted to write a cool fight scene.

>>43075869
>I was talking about the 5 or so italicized paragraphs
Oh, in that case I agree as well.

>>43075936
>seems like a package to deliver the Night Fight chapter
What a strange conclusion to reach! This is a [Drama] story about Nebula and Sky's (mostly Sky's) loyalty, Luna's state of mind as post-moon NMM, and the circumstances surrounding them all. The primary point of the story is to show Sky's interactions with Luna and how, in the end, the baps actually reach Luna-Luna inside NMM-Luna (and that it was Luna all along, not some fairytale ruthless monster). From the other side, the fic seeks to build up the S01E02 in order to explain some of the apparent flaws or strange decisions in it. The fight chapter is the eye candy. The story practically pauses for ~9k to deliver it, and resumes directly afterwards. You could easily cut it out or summarize it in 500 words and the fic would be intact—better, actually, due to removing what's essentially filler.
>baplore was all but absent.
No, it was just subtle. I liked that. It made baps fit into Equestria without constructing fifty layers of AU-verse on top of the show. Not that this is always bad, but doing it like this is also good.
>slavish adherence to the Mare in the Moon timeline and events to be fairly tedious
It is a form of a fixfic. To depart from show canon would undermine the goals of the story.
>toy references
Yep, yep. They were the worst part of the fic for me.

>>43076486
The fight scene was probably my favorite part. It definitely went on for way too long, but I didn't mind too much, since t was constructed with enough thought and focus on each side trying to get a tactical advantage rather than in-the-moment action, which tends to get boring over long stretches.

Trying to seriously incorporate the toy lines into the narrative (as an arbitrary self-imposed challenge I guess?) kind of amused me, but I think there were better ways of doing it.

The author doesn't quite spell it out, but seemingly subsrcribes to the theory that NMM's challenges were a result of her unwillingness to murder, which I approve of. I agree about the last couple of challenges being rushed, though. I expected the Wonderbolts would get converted into the Shadowbolts and that's why they showed up in the fic in the first place, but no it's still just illusion lmao. And that ending was basically a recap, seemed really rushed and like the author just wanted to get it over with.

For the most part, there's nothing really wrong with how the story executes its premise, but it wasn't a very exciting premise in the first place. Like I said, the description made this fic sound way more interesting than it ended up being for me.

>>43075794
>that opening scene was incredibly effective at presenting all of the main characters and the world
>>43075752
>Having her be with Sky (us) and guiding most of the story just to force her away for the climax was a good idea with good execution
I can agree with these.
>>43075988
>There are a lot of better bapfics.
And also this, which is weird, because I thought you were the one suggesting this for the club in the first place.

What are some fics from the early fandom that you remember
I wish there was a page that showed the most popular fics for every year of the fandom

>>43076504
There is. It's called "learn to use search parameters you troglodyte".

>>43076486
>I don't have a lot to say about this week's fic.
>1/2
ehehe

>>43076498
>since t was constructed with enough thought and focus on each side trying to get a tactical advantage rather than in-the-moment action
And yet maybe the only dislike I had while reading it was why Soarin had such excellent vision during it. The first part of the fight they have a part where Sky and Soarin are within the canopy and Soarin is keeping up with Sky no prob, which really doesn't make any sense, especially when later he does the same thing but actually loses him.

>>43076504
Define "early".
Eyes On You is my favourite 2011-12 fic.
Also, what >>43076508 said.

>>43075718
>>43075718
i really liked this fic. the core dynamic that that the fic is built around of a villain being assisted by who ponies who don't share her goals is a really interesting one. sky and nebula were also great characters; something important to have in a fic like this one that's almost entirely talking. nightmare moon is probably as interesting and deep as you possibly could make a canon compliant nightmare moon, that is to say, pretty good too, but still the worst character in the fic. that's more of a compliment to sky and nebula's characterization than it is an insult to nightmare's though.

i haven't read anything else involving batponies, so i don't know how much of their lore in this fic is unique to it, and how much is prexisting batpony lore snippets (batponies being cursed pegasi, and celestia having an outgoing offer to remove the curse that few take both ring a bell at least). but regardless, i did like the vesperquine lore as it was presented in this fic. for the most part anyway.
i'm not sure that i buy that vesperquine society has so much focus on luna, but effectively no one else has ever heard of her. vesperquines are rare, yes, but the fic implies that interactions between them and day ponies happen a decent amount.
you mean to tell me that romantic relationships between vesperquines and day ponies are common enough that nebula can comment on how many of them end when the day pony learns that their children are all garanteed to be vesperquines, but throughout all interactions between vesperquines and day ponies, they never bring their princess up? there's no curious day pony historians that want to write a book on vesperquine history? maybe if vesperquines were sworn to secrecy, but the fic never mentions anything like that. they're just the only ones who didn't forget luna.
forgetting that your 1000 year old monarch used to have a sister i can get behind, especially if you accept the headcanon that celestia went out of her way to purge her from the histoy books. but if there's a race that hasn't forgotten her, even a very small one, and that race is allowed to interact freely with the rest of the populace, i don't think she's going to stay forgotten.
it's a pretty small thing, really. certainly less egregious than the show's own plotholes involving ponies knowing/not knowing about luna/nightmare moon, but it still bugs be a bit considering how great the rest of the fic's worldbuilding is.
(1/4)

>>43076543
i'm not usually a fan of big action scenes in fics. most of the time they're not very engaging to me, and i'm mostly just waiting for them to be over. but even though the vast majority of this fic is just talking, i actually did like the fight against the wonderbolts. i do think it could have been shorter though. i remember that during the first section with sky and soarin, i was hoping that when they found nebula and the other two wonderbolts again, that they wouldn't be fighting and that it would be revealed that nebula said something to get through to them. and that wasn't even that far into the fight. it went on long enough that when nightmare moon came back i thought she'd mention how the mane 6 not only got past the ghosties, but also the river. still, i'd rather have an engaging fight scene that overstays its welcome than a shorter one that bores me. and having nebula choke out fleetfoot while she's distracted was a very good way of showing just how dedicated she was to saving luna.
having nebula injure her wing during the fight and forcing her out of the fic also worked really well in my opinion. i loved having sky on his own, and showing that nebula's words hadn't just affected luna, but also sky to the point that he was as dedicated to getting through to her as she was, when at the stat of the fic he was nowhere close to that. i do wish there was a scene of nebula seeing luna as luna for the first time though.

now, to talk about the elephant in the room, the toy voicelines. i laughed out loud during nebulas exposition about celestia after she used the elements. the idea of taking those toys and referencing them as a serious bit of drama is just absolutely insane. and the crazy thing is that it DOES work. i like the idea of the sheer power of wielding all six elements at once combined with banishing her own sister putting her into a kind of fugue state. taking the voice lines from the toy and recontextualizing them to be heartbreaking works perfectly in theory, but the sheer absurdity of making the reference in the first place severely undercuts the whole thing. because of that, i think the fic is genuinely just better if you aren't familiar with those toys at all.
(2/4)

>>43075725
>Games We Play
Honestly, it might be one of my favorite romance fics I've read on FimFic. The slow burn romance is really good and the contemplative atmosphere all throughout is very compelling, but it has one glaring flaw (spoilers for the fic's structure) it started off as a 'whodunit' mystery and then halfway through abandoned any attempts to steer you away from the obvious answer, then the author coped that it was never about the mystery in the first place, which might be true, but it was objectively the story's initial hook. I wouldn't mind a club on it, but I have a feeling the people are going to hyper-focus on that flaw, especially if they're not into the main ship.
>The Archetypist
Haven't read this, looks really promising though.
>One White Unicorn
Long-form horror is an acquired taste.
>Foal of the Forest
Feel like i've had enough of NMM follower fics for now
>Cake Thief
Also a good option.
>>43076488
Ah, never mind then. I was gonna vote for The Archetypist, but I wouldn't mind doing this one either.
>>43076519
Most of it is commenting on specific details that caught my eye rather than the more general impressions.
Speaking of, one general impression I forgot is that the prose starts off really simplistic in the first chapter, but picks up and gets more descriptive by the second half of it.

>>43076544
before reading this fic, i believed that there was only one way for the elements to turn nightmare moon back into luna without just acting as a brainwashing beam. after reading this fic, i think that's changed, but only just.
sky and nebula's words were certainly making progress towards getting the old luna back, that implication is clear, but it's impossible to tell if they ever would have been enough on their own, or if the elements were necessary.
same goes for the elements. there's no way to know if they needed the assist from the night guard or not. and even if they did, would that even make it not brainwashing, or just less intense brainwashing.
but in this fic, nightmare moon seems to be luna, but without the parts of her that are regretful and sorrowful; and that the elements simply broke that barrier down and allowed her to feel those things again. this is similar to what i thought was the only way for the elements to not just brainwash luna: if nightmare moon was luna plus another evil entity that either she made, accidentally or intentionally, or that found and latched onto her. and the elements either destroyed it purged or purged it from her. but i think i actually like how this fic makes nightmare moon luna- more than my idea of her being luna+. it's a little closer to brainwashing, but it's more in line with canon, and lets her be seperate from luna, while still being entirely luna, if that makes sense.
(3/4)

>>43076315
No, it's not a fetish of mine. It's just how pornography tends to work. Most of the time, a decent writer isn't going to dwell on the newness of the situation. The newness shows up indirectly. The examples I gave might have sentences like these, all of which imply that the situation is somehow new:
>Bright Mac's bed wasn't just a bed now. It was a marriage bed, and they were a married couple.
>"What do you mean, 'mares turn you on'? Do I turn you on?" "Sure do, sugarcube." "Well, why didn't you say something before?"
>Shining Armor said, "Twily, what are you talking about? We can't do that! Even if I'm, well... even if I kinda do need the help."
>Spitfire said, "Rainbow Dash, the Wonderbolts are a team. A close team. And if you're going to be part of that team, then you need to do what everypony else on this team does."
>"Pinkie! What are you—mmphf!" said Rarity as she was muffled by Pinkie's kiss. When Pinkie broke the kiss, she whispered "Close your eyes and relax. Trust me."
>When she had recovered from her climax, Starlight Glimmer rolled off of Trixie. She looked around and realized the stallions had formed a ring around the two mares. They had watched every moment, every touch and every lick. All of their cocks were out of their sheaths, and two of the stallions were stroking themselves. When Starlight had come to the club, she had only thought about the sex, not about how she would be on display. But knowing that these stallions had watched her and Trixie made a powerful warmth surge through her loins.
>"Oh, o-o-o-kay. Um, here I go." Fluttershy leaned forward and gave a tentative lick. "Did that... did it feel okay?"
>Cup Cake said, "I've got something special planned for tonight. You big stud you." She giggled.
>"Sister, this is a most unusual thing you are asking me to do," Luna said.
You see? None of those use "first" or "new" or any words like that at all, but they all imply that something is new. Go read a dozen clopfics and you'll see: It is nearly always the case that something about the sex scene is new for one or more of the characters involved.

>>43076548
there is a lot of room for interpreting the elements' effects on luna in this fic, but i think there's only two that i really like. they both allow for the efforts of both the night guard and mane 6 to be crucial to saving luna.
the first is:
>no amount of effort on the night guard's part could ever break down the barriers that luna had put up within herself
>the elements could, even if sky and nebula had done nothing, but if they did, nightmare moon would have just rejected her regrets and sorrows again, just like she did 1000 years ago
>it is only thanks to sky and nebula softening the nightmare that she did not
the other is:
>no amount of effort on the night guard's part could ever break down the barriers that luna had put up within herself
>but the elements could also not do this singlehandedly, and if they were used on her without nebula and sky's setup, they would have just banished her to the moon instead
of these two, i think i prefer the latter, because it ties into this line i really liked
>“For the record, Sky, I don't intend to see Twilight Sparkle killed. But neither do I intend to let her use the Elements to banish Princess Luna again.”
i'm kind of disapointed this line never came up again. we the readers know what the elements end up doing to nightmare moon, but the characters don't, and the one other time they've been used on her she got banished to the moon. we don't get a brief moment of despair from nebula or sky as they watch the rainbow beam spiral up and crash down onto luna, and they truly believe they've failed at saving her, only for the light to fade revealing their princess sans nightmare. instead, sky literally sees the rainbow laser and doesn't even realize it's the elements of harmony.

there was a lot of other small things i really liked too, like the spooky trees containing literal demons, or nebula using the same names for the elements that celestia does at the end of magical mystery cure, but i think i've said enough about this fic already.

all in all, i really did enjoy this fic a lot, despite its flaws. for most of it, i knew i was going to upvote it unless the ending was fumbled hard, but i was on the fence about favoriteing it. that changed when the ending made me cry. i'm such a sucker for sap.

>>43075735
>>Luna tells Sky Diamond to rape Belle Dancer
the first thing i thought of when the command was introduced was nightmare commanding sky to rape belle.