>>6366412
>goon to touhou and drink coke

>>6366412
>you don't have a driver's license
Drive anyways

>>6366412
>read books to increase your IQ and plan better in the future

>>6366425
you try to goon to touhou but you can't find your tiny mexican pecker because it's hidden under your massive gut.
>no mame wey. my peepee obsessed with mi
you then go to the fridge and open it. unfortunately, only 1 gallon is left.
>the fridge obsessed with me o algo
you down it in a single chug, then unleash a burp that kills several of the cockroaches in your house.
>>6366479
you realize that you don't have a car, either, and you don't know how to steal one.
>el carro obsessed with mi
>>6366656
you waddle your ass down to the library. the librarian gags for a moment as you approach.
<h-how can I help you, sir?
>hola pende-senor i'm looking for books to make me smarterer
<um... you'll have to be more specific

write in the books that you want to ask for. also roll 1d100 bo3 to not fuck up this basic conversation

>>6366705
We would like a book on how to hotwire a car, a book on american cheeseburger food (trying to blend into the culture, o algo), and a book with tiddies, since we have needs cabrón.

Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>6366748
I forgot to roll o algo

/qst/ obsessed with mi...

>>6366705
>no image

Jvg87Zz7 obsessed with mi...

Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>6366705
book on vegetables and digestive enzymes so we can grow deadlier

>>6366412 (OP)
>search for an enclosed space with lots of people
Mi farts son already muy lethaloso, so mi just need to locatizar unos MAGA chuditos to gas. Mi will robar them of their dinero, y use it to buy libros, ese, yeah.

>>6367591
roll nigga
type dice+1d100 in the options field o algo

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>6367624

update probably tomorrow o algo because sleep obsessed with mi

As Shitoko was talking to the librarian, three ICE agents enter the library and announce:
>this is a raid you have illegal aliens or something
They walk up to Shitoko
>sir have you seen any illegals we received a report that there was a mexican here or however taco is fried
>ay caramba, americanos are obsessed...
Shitoko whispered
What does Shitoko do?

>Pretend to be American
>Escape
>Fight
>Write-in

>>6370615
Pull off one of the ice agent's masks, revealing him to be hispanic

>>6370615
>Write-in
>"You are not allowed to arrest me, the DOW is over 50K."

>>6370808
Shitoko senses a familiar scent of tacos and cola from one of the ICE agents
>ay hermano why you working for ice obsessed traitoro
He reaches for the agents mask and pulls it off. The face behind the mask could be called hispanic. It would be also equally valid to describe it as saxon, nordic, indian and SEAsian, among many other races.
>what are yo-
The agents take a couple of steps back and pull out their handguns
>you are under arrest for assaulting an officer and being mexican or something
>get down or you will be shot or whatever
>>6370811
>"You are not allowed to arrest me, the DOW is over 50K"
Replies Shitoko, in an uncharacteristic manner. The officers seem to second guess whether or not Shitoko is a mexican.
>you don't sound mexican i think
>we still should arrest you for assault or however the milk is shaked
What does Shitoko do?

>>6370953
"I announce the talmud o algo"

>>6371035

Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>6371035

>>6370953
"six seven o algo"