Thread #154258017
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Playoffs Bingo Edition
News
>The complete round 1 schedule has been announced
> https://www.nhl.com/news/2026-stanley-cup-playoffs-first-round-schedul e-television-results
Tomorrow
>Ottawa Senators @ Carolina Hurricanes — 3:00 PM ET
>Minnesota Wild @ Dallas Stars — 5:30 PM ET
>Philadelphia Flyers @ Pittsburgh Penguins — 8:00 PM ET
Join the /hoc/ playoff bracket
>https://bracketchallenge.nhl.com/en/leagues/17788
/hoc/vious >>154254177
506 RepliesView Thread
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>mild
>cuck
>dan
>gay
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I this the Crosby rapes Canada bracket
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>>154258096
>>154258126
pls gary
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Nothing makes me more assured that most of you are flat out retarded than looking at the brackets.
I get that a lot of times you want >your team and thats whatever.
It's the ones that have shit like Utah and Senators and Ducks going deep. Have you learned nothing from Gary like fucking hell apply yourself
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>>154258167
You mad?
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I feel seen :]
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>>154258108
Breaking News: Elias Pettersson (50% retained) and Evander Kane (35% retained) traded to Edmonton for Darnell Nurse.
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first round marner is a different kind of beast
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20 hours, Mildtrannies.
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>>154258363
fraid so they just don't miss
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the randies have absolutely terrible goaltending. possibly the worst goaltending of all the teams in the playoffs. you cant possible be serious when you saying that fucking brandon bussy will somehow take them to the fucking conference finals when the teams strategy is literally to somehow hope that fucking 39 year old freddy andersen is just going to somehow return from injury and just be in vezina form to save their season. i get half you retards dick ride jtranny and corsi and all that shit but jesus fucking christ stop licking windows for just one second when you post.
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>>154258167
1) The bracket is not for money
2) If I pick almost all favorites, and I win the /hoc/ bracket challenge, I will not care. I might not even notice
3) If I pick the Philadelphia Flyers to win the Stanley Cup and it somehow happens, it will be because of my massive brain
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My Greyhounds have been eliminated :/
Fuck the rags
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>>154258565
>>154258577
count me in
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>>154258429
bussi has been decent this season
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>>154258769
The hot ones live in edmonton
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>>154258821
Think you'd win?
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got my ploffs hash ready to go
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>Penguin fans haven't met Porter Martone yet
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It’s up
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>muh flyers in the playoffs just when I was trying to take a break from drinking
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>>154259164
that isnt what vegas thinks so who cares
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>>154259216
The players don't care enough to bitch about it because if they do the (((owners))) will ask them to give something in return to change it, even though this shitty format was entirely caused by ownership and Gary
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Did you know that in Surrey, BC, if they catch you wearing an Oilers jersey, they'll lock you in a cage and display you to the public?
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>Carolina
Is this the year they finally break through the ECF?
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>>154259272
Yes, I know what the CBA is. Like I said if the players demand to switch the playoff format they'll be asked by owners to give something in return. They don't seethe about it nearly as much as fans do so they aren't going to give anything up to get a change for something they don't really care about.
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we all saw keith tkachuk there at the game with that mysterious man in the israel jersey. you are only kidding yourself if you think he wont be there this year watching bradys games in the eastern conference final with that same israel jersey man again.
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>Congratulations to Junie and Raven on your engagement!
>from the Victoire de Montréal team
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>>154259342
Round 1 is always the best round where as I start to lose interest by round 3
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>>154259352
better lookers than the last one
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I think this one is fake because
1.) they are both actually young attractive women
2.) they are both dressed the exact same
3.) they both have a ring to propose to each other
4.) the ring boxes both happen to be the exact same
PWHL is nothing but a propaganda league.
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>>154258096
It would be so fucking funny if the Oil-Fires make it to the final for a third time in a row and lose again specifically because they traded Skinner for Jarry.
And this specific outcome would be extra cathartic. Canadian teams would have the best shot at finally taking the Cup home in years, only for the Penguins of all teams to take it from them.
At the beginning of the season, everyone thought they knew the script. The Pens would tank like hell, trade Crosby for one last hurrah and have the draft rigged in their favor again so they could be carried by McKenna for another 20 years. But that didn't happen.
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>>154259352
>>154259453
do they really need helmets for this?
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>>154259576
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>>154259590
Edmonton runs /hoc/
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>>154259486
Crosby is never leaving Pittsburgh again. The man wears the same disgusting yellowed-ass decades old pads in every game and makes sure to wear the same visibly moldy baseball cap in every postgame interview. He's so superstitious, he expects every other player on the team to adopt their own, even when it's shit like leaving a garage door open.
He's not playing a single second for any other team, and he's probably going to follow in Mario's footsteps and end up as a coach or in the front office the day he's done playing, because every single day of his life from birth has been dedicated to Hockey.
The man would be a mental case picking his skin like a drug addict and fucking around with light switches every time he walks into a room if his dad didn't channel that neuroticism into being the Third Greatest Hockey Player of all time.
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>>154259658
I didn't say he'd be good. Yinzers are just such suckers for capeshit-tier sports stories that they never criticize any of the teams and will piss their pants whenever Their Guy comes back. They ask if every long tenured player is going to stick around as a coach, or buy a stake in the team or shit like that, even if they just want to settle down and retire. They even did it for fucking Gus Frerotte and Pat McAfee even though neither of them played in Pittsburgh.
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>>154259697
My dad does it. I've done it a couple of times, but more out of laziness than out of superstition. My superstitions goes far far beyond a playoff beard. Our team is in the 10th playoff final in 15 seasons.
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Who cares
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>>154259590
Does this count as an Edmonton square?
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>>154259778
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Rate my bracket.
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playoff jarry finna get unlocked
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I'm not able to make a bracket because I can't login to my account and when I try to reset my password it says my email isn't linked to an account and when I try and register t says my email is already in use
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>>154259770
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is he finally ready?
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How many games does Skinner get until playoff Silovs gets his chance?
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>>154259941
Silovs will take over in the SCF against the Oilers after Skinner gets chased
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>>154259911
His run shall be blessed by our indian brethrens
JAI SRI RAM
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damn, the indian gm signed with the devils. i was really looking forward to toronto being run by a literal indian.
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No more brother wars
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i come from planet retard :)
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>>154259999
nice digits but its mammoth/sabres
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>blow gays are so bad the opposing team accidentally turns a double play
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>>154259894
I love him
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Flames fan IQ test was whether you wanted Sutter fired or not, if you did you failed it. Bell is a g for this. https://calgarysun.com/opinion/columnists/bell-calgary-flames-talk-is- cheap-fans-dont-need-another-con-jo b
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my canesies are going to btfo the senaturds
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>>154258017
Made some improvements
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Politics and islanders aside, Kash looks cool lol
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>>154260159
>tries way too hard to be white
its working though
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>>154260092
I swear most of these misprints are just a viral marketing strategy. So a bunch of goobers can feel like they have something special even though it has the exact same profit margin as every other shirt Fanatics sells. It's never player names on the replica jerseys, it's never any other merchandise, it's always the cheapest, shittiest t-shirts they sell.
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>>154260127
>>154260159
>>154260175
>>154260182
Hallo yes do you like 420 weed? pls show bobs
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Fanatics released its top 10 most popular jerseys sold this season.
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for the final time this season, it's up
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>>154260294
>>154260308
The main customers of each jersey
>heated rivalry enjoyers
>muh record
>pens bandwagoners that had already thrown out their old jersyes
>gold medal
>mcdavid himself
>avs bandwagoners
>avs bandwagoners
>good taste havers
>retards
>heated rivalry enjoyers (forma de sunbelt)
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>Still not fired
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>>154260329
if I was one of these guys I would pay someone to buy a million of my jerseys and hand out half of them to homeless people and the other half to various third worlders, easy advertising
drop 50 or so on north sentinel island to top it off
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>>154260362
why won't you drink coffee?
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>>154260387
Hell, you can make any old jersey into a new player jersey. For example
>buy old gaudreau/tkachuk flames jersey
>take it to the team store
>have them change the name and number to Zayne Parekh, #19, for a nominal fee
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>>154260308
The only jersey fairweather Pens fans buy is Crosby's. And a lot of them buy one every few years just to stay up to date, so they can wear it to the shittiest, dirtiest dive bar in the neighborhood that has one TV from 2012 mounted awkwardly on each of the four walls, all playing the same cable feed of the Stanley Cup Final.
Invariably, one of those TVs will be getting an inexplicably shitty, fuzzy signal out of the coax splitter that makes it look like a fucked up analogue over-the-air broadcast.
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>>154260438
Pov: (You)
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I'm indignant
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>>154260880
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common /hoc/ our hasbs have a fighting chance against the florida crack heads
you have a couple of hours to fix (your) picks
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According to Friday the 13th In Space hockey was outlawed in 2024. Does anyone remember if this happened?
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>>154261298
>refugee
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>>154261339
but I like it
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bedard's growing out his facial hair as fast as he can to ward off those from /hoc/ who lust for his bussy
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Maybe if EP40 and his tiny little friends hadn't celebrated Indian Harvest Day, maybe then they could've beaten the Oilers.
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>>154261430
San Jose is an extreme fairweather market for Hockey. No one pays attention until the Sharks are in the Playoffs, if they get there at all. The only reason they don't have the absolute worst attendance rate in the whole NHL is that SAP Center is slightly undersized and they're in a huge, wealthy market with no duplicate teams splitting demand. Just look at Anaheim, they're in the same boat, but worse, because they're splitting demand with LA.
They don't have the excuse of being tied to a relatively small metro area or a venue in a really inconvenient part of town like Pittsburgh.
They don't have a lack of history and relevance like Calgary.
They're not even loveable Hockey Town underdogs who never come close to winning like Vancouver.
They're just good enough to show their faces every few years, stuck right in the middle of California, in the worst part of the Bay Area, and they have just enough of a legacy that they don't feel like a fake team.
Celebrini jerseys sell to people who want to be able to say they got in on the ground floor and owned a Celebrini jersey before he became the next big fixture in the league. The same thing is going to happen with McKenna on the Blackhawks.
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>>154261374
>Do not sniff fuel
>This is what it will do to you
>You could explode
>It will damage your heart
>It will make you go crazy
>And this can also happen to you
>If you keep sniffing for a long time
>Eventually
>You will die
hell yeah, it's playoffs time
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SubGOD's bracket just dropped !
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I can't believe this washed unc might sign on for another year
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I am deliberately not making a bracket because that only encourages Gary to keep this retarded format
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.
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>>154261885
ah I see, just looked him up
glad he got clean
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>>154261806
It's relatively easy to have the ~80,000 die hard fans who attend multiple games a year it takes to get 16,000 to 17,000 people in the door for every game when your metropolitan area adds up to ten million people.
Pound for pound, teams like Buffalo, Pittsburgh and Calgary, and especially Nashville have way more enthusiasm from their cities. Most people in the Bay Area don't give a fuck about Hockey, but it's big enough that all the people who do add up to a significant market.
It's just a fact that more of the population is willing to spend big money on Hockey in a lot of other nominally smaller markets as compared to San Jose. That's why Celebrini's jersey is so low on the list.
If he were playing anywhere in Canada but Calgary, he'd be number one by far. If he were playing in Colorado or Nashville, he'd be number one by far.
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my tiebreaker guess was 24 goals
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just found it
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>>154261782
>"they can be just as smart as you and me"
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>>154261976
I tried asking AI about their performance over the years but AI fucking sucks ass and can't read images so it can't read the whole bracket so it has no idea how accurate they are
this is what it said:
>Across the years where I could inspect enough of EA’s posted bracket to score it, the results were:
>2022: 10/15 series correct
>2024: 1/5 verifiable series correct
>2025: 1/7 verifiable series correct
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>>154261971
>>154261782
GO HABS GO
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>>154261971
:)
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>>154262179
no, not her, delete
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reminder
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>>154262252
diaper
>>154262267
blocked
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>>154262255
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>>154262187
based oilbro
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>>154262294
true dat E.M. bout to get her comeuppance
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>>154262392
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https://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1776502855045940.mp4" target="_blank">https://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1776502855045940.mp4
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>this is who's influencing bedard now that foligno's gone
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>>154262732
Hockey makes more than wrestling. The nhl signed like a 7.7 billion over 5 years tv deal with espn, then a 225 million per year with TNT, then the billion plus dollars a year they get from canada, then you add regional rights and foreign rights. Wwe got 5.5 billion dollars from netflix over 10 years and 1.6.billion in total over 5 years from espn. That's a lot of money but less than hockey.
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>>154261675
>mfw
>>154261753
This is a very concise and well worded summary anon
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Waow i wanna be shot into the net
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>>154262961
I think the biggest issue is that teams like the Blackhawks are establishment teams with, critically, good colours that casual fans might buy, while primary teal is a big ask for anybody if they're not literally going to the game. Only the cali fin version is somewhat attractive.
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>>154263004
that's a good point actually, I wouldn't wear that shit compared to superior Bruins colours
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>>154263309
>>154263314
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>>154258017
I'm happy to share with you all my predictions I made when the season started :)
I posted this image on October 14th, 2025
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my flyers are playing tonight!
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>>154263513
>cantpucks
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>>154263338
<3
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lazy chilimac and a magnesium tablet are going to put me right to sleep tonight. I will dream about the Stanley's Cup and try to come to terms with the fact that Lightning will probably get it
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boutta go for a afternoon coffee blast
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>>154263551
>>154263582
Pettersson said last summer that he put on 6kg of muscle. Six fucking kilogram. I thought okay, maybe the Canucks are back and EP40 is back. What I didn't know at the time was that he's a psychopath liar who lies all the time. 6kg of muscle over one summer is impossible but he just said it
https://hockeysverige.se/nhl/elias-pettersson-om-formen-vancouver-canu cks/
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Good morning /hoc/
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>>154263693
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>>154263713
>t. the country that produces the likes of celebrini and bedard
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>>154263746
Yes but we also produce players like murderin Mike Matheson
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That's why I fucked yo' bitch, you fat motherfucker
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>>154263784
Maybe the video will jog your memory
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>>154263854
Still unsure. Maybe this picture will jog your memory?
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>wins the cup
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>>154263719
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It's up: https://youtu.be/L1dBtCvomLI?si=Ovvk6e7sYUT1Wu83
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>>154263615
This is completely irrelevant to the Canucks being good or not. At the beginning of the season Hughes was your best player EP40 was the sideshow. Pettersson's problem isn't his size it's the fact that's he the most predictable player in the league who refuses to take any risk