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>>1557737
on a 10 scale, I'd say 5

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>>1557740
I hope the rest of your day gets better fren

>>1557737
I'm not good.

>>1557744
I'm sorry to hear that, so what's the matter fren?

>>1557737
Think I'm doing well.
But how are you, friend?

>>1557746
That's nice. I am empty I think, I just feel a gaping void where my emotions and sense of enjoyment should be. But thanks for asking fren, you're the only one that has. :D

>>1557748
Why, can you tell us a bit more about yourself and maybe your situation?

>>1557756
Well the thing is that I don't know why, if I did I would have solved it by now. It's difficult for me to ascertain a reason or reasons for why I feel this way. Perhaps it was my upbringing, I have an emotionally distant mother and an abusive father, in regard to my father I don't see him much, the very sight of him makes me physically sick. As for my mother, she just mostly ignores me, but that's nothing new. I live with my parents, I have no friends IRL and I live in a secluded town away out in the country.

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>>1557737
Worried. I have been talking to this girl who I have really liked for the past few months, but now she is quite ill. I am worried since it has been a week of illness. I wish I was there to take care of her, but we are not at that stage yet. We have not gone out, though we agreed to at some point (was originally going to be around now, but as the saying goes, man plans, God laughs).

P.S: Watch Zipang

>>1557759
I hope everything works out well, you seem like a kind, caring person.

>>1557757
I get the feeling. Those are quite a few things. How do you spend your day?

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>>1557743
yeah...maybee thanks I guess

>>1557766
messaging my online friends, playing video games with them, sharing music, etc. And when they're not online I would maybe go out on a walk around a ruined stone tower deep in the forest, or just to the general store, which is really the only store. If I can't then I read novels or lie down and do nothing which can be difficult sometimes because I feel as though I should be doing something, but there's nothing to do. Other days I play guitar, that's about it. I don't find what I engage in to be enjoyable, but I do it nevertheless. How about you?

>>1557770
I guess nothing too fancy myself. But I do try and enjoy them while doing what seems important. I play myself the guitar every now and then, also.

I take it that maybe you neither work nor study? Did something happen?

>>1557773
I used to go to college but then because I was severely bullied I quit after I was beaten so bad that my stomach ruptured. Since then I have a fear of such places because of that incident. As for work, I do freelance jobs, a bit of writing or coding usually.

>>1557775
Sorry to hear about the college thing.

You didn't include either of the two activities in your day, though.

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>>1557737
Compared to my average, not too bad. Said average though has not been great for the last few years - no energy, no motivation, mediocre non-restorative sleep, tired all day for no reason, significant anhedonia. Just not enjoying life at all, outside of maybe eating food. I'm surprised that I'm managing to keep my job, but I guess my past performances guaranteed my job security for the foreseeable future.
But today I've at least managed to read another event story in Blue Archive, I only have four more events and one more main story volume to read, and I'll be all caught up with the JP server. I want to read more or at least watch anime again, let alone do anything productive (which is mostly fan translation or e.g. trying to learn a creative skill), but my brain unilaterally decides that it requires more energy than I have for even passive content consumption, and that the very low amount of reward dopamine is not worth the energy spent. I've tried SSRIs and various sleep pills of course, and I begrudgingly do walks and exercises, no use.
Overall, though, not much to complain about, just chilling.

>>1557764
Thank you, it has been another not having spoken to her. I could not sleep last night because of it. I pray for her health each night, but each night I get a bit more worried. I know it is only the flu, but I just think about what happens whenever I get ill (it usually winds up in an urgent care visit or a hospital stay).

I guess it is comforting to know that her immune health is normal and better than mine by default.

I wish not to fully dox myself, but she is my only true friend, before that there was no one that I could just speak to honestly like her for several years. Unfortunately that man (strictly speaking a friend, I am not gay or anything kek) is no longer around. I just hope that, despite all of my failings in life that he is proud of who I am now, even if I have little to show for. There is still a long road ahead of me, and it might take a lifetime to truly get what I want, but I hope to reach it and die happy when my time comes.

All I want for is to not be completely alone again and have no friends or anyone to talk to in life. Three years was too long. I used to get excited when I had received a message, when it was only the telephone company or an emergency alert test.

Tell me, do you have a best friend? what about a girlfriend?

>>1557757
>>1557775
These sound like good suggestions for knowing too little.

I know that sometimes things can feel really empty, as though it all had no sense, and somehow, people just failed to see it. But there is more than that. There really is. And hope you get to enjoy it too.

If something, remember that you matter.

God bless

We can't go back to the beginning and modify it. But we can start now and change how it ends.

Our mistakes and those of others don't need to define us.

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>>1557737
I've fallen so hard for my co-worker and it's obvious she doesn't feel the same way. I'm trying to get over her but I can't because I have to see her every day at work. shit hurts

How are you?

>>1557737
Kind of meh, I'm almost done with my novel and I don't know what's next for me after that. It's been the only thing keeping me here for a few years now

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>>1557737
Extraordinarily high to the point I'm seeing double, bidding on coins that cost too much, and listening to Cocteau Twins. Osaka is so cute bro

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My brother killed himself three weeks ago, feels bad man.
Trying my best to stay sober, get out of bed early and eat something every day. Angry. Sad. Exhausted.

I try my best, thanks for asking.

>>1557737
I'm tired, boss.

>>1557917
If she doesn't have a boyfriend, nothing is set in stone.
Things change, people change.
She may change, you can change too.

But see also, that however troubling the situation, it does nothing to neither her or your worth. People are more valuable than small things like conflicts or differences in interests, including you.

Heartfelt feelings
Godspeed

I've come to terms that I'm going to die alone.

>>1557933
Really sorry to hear so.

How old was him? Was he younger or older?

>>1557737
Not great.

Wife kicked me out of our apartment a few days ago and I had to move back to my parents' place. Also going through a lot of work-related stress right now.

Motivated to fix things, though. Wife and I are on tentative speaking terms again and there might still be a future for us. She made the whole thing public though, so I'm also dealing with the fallout among our shared friend group.

I fucked up but still don't think the aftermath was proportional.

But hey, things get better from what I hear.

>>1558066
33. Three weeks older. Just talked to my mom on the phone, she is messed up obviously but just got some new medication for her anxiety.

Maybe life will go on. Day 10 sober now.

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>>1558091
Three years older* shit.
I'll go take a nap. Hope you are doing well.

>>1558091
While life goes on, that will never be as though his life and departure never happened. Right?
As every moment shared with those we love, becomes part of who we are. Mistakes, an opportunity to continue their growth. And in that, they're still with us.

But take this with as much salt as proper

>>1558039
Thank you so much

>>1558053
How did you come to that?

>>1557737
5 out of 10.i'm a sad low iq retard filled with anxiety and bitterness

>>1557737
wishing i had a ton of money and could quit my job and move cities, that's pretty much it