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rorke's trim

*flops my bbc in front of rorke's face*

Your move, rorke

>>220714147
*sucks it*

>>220714127
i look like this

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Nth for berg

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the reads

Stomachberg sounding like an old creaky ship. Postprandial poo beckons

toilfu didnt appreciate it when I drove right up behind her this morning, may have misjudged that one

mental going to our capital city and feeling like a foreigner for having a scottish accent

umberg

sunset found her squatting in the grass

>>220714158
based retard

I brought flowers to your door last night
I done you wrong and I wanna make it right
You say I'm not welcome here
I know it oughta be perfectly clear
But I can't help but wonder what it might be like

If I had two dozen roses
And an older bottle of wine
If I really coulda hung the moon
Would you change your mind
If I could cry a little harder
And get a little less sleep at night
If I had two dozen roses
Would it change your mind

Oh, I must have been a fool back then
To lose something that you can't have again
I've done all that I know to do
And second guessed my every move
I can't help but wonder how it might have been

If I had two dozen roses
And an older bottle of wine
If I really coulda hung the moon
Would it change your mind
If I could cry a little harder
And get a little less sleep at night
If I had two dozen roses
Would it change your mind

If I could cry a little harder
And get a little less sleep at night
If I had two dozen roses
Would it change your mind
Oh baby, would you change your mind
Oh baby, would you change your mind
Oh baby, would you change your mind

Oh baby, could you change your mind
Oh baby, would you change your mind

any crawling with parasites man in

>>220714140
That shave may have saved his life. Imagine someone tried to chin him with the beard. They'd hit him square in the throat.

>>220714116
I think the topic was burning cash not consooming

think I may have lost my favourite hat :(

Got a Moccamaster coffee brewer myself, I grind the beans before I go to bed in my Wilfa grinder and set my smart plug to turn on just before I wake up so I come down every morning to a big pot of freshly brewed delicious hot coffee. The gf and I drink the whole pot over the course of the morning.

>>220714223
Don't do cross thread arguments mate, sorry.

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>>220714174

>>220714251
cross thread conversations are master morality
not engaging is slave morality

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>>220714140

>>220714259
rorke's grandad

bunch of comedians in the old there. sort yourselves out

fetch the fuckin bolt cutters you crazy bastards

>>220714259
Odd video in everyway

>>220714262
not sure what this expression is supposed to convey

>>220714235
the ideal gf

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pale scottish girls

>>220714176
This is all in Scottish people's heads. It's like the Dartmouth scar experiment.

The subjects were told they were in a study on how people react to folks with scars and disfigurements. They used make up and prosthetics to make them look fucked up, and showed them it in the mirror. Then they added some finishing touches and had them go talk to strangers around a campus. They all came back and reported that everyone treated them worse. Wouldn't make eye contact, we're visibly uncomfortable etc. The twist? Those finishing touches actually removed the scars. They'd been imagining people's reactions to scars they didn't have.

>>220714358
Timmy’s crush

work is a lot more boring when there aren't any girls on shift

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2v4DA2UwSA
the listen

(mental how good the tekken 4 stage music was)

I think it would be cool if pj harvey and fiona apple made an album together

>>220714379
she's for the cronem x

>>220714381
Be the change you want to see in the world. Cut your willy off.

>>220714396
also if they lezzed out haha jk jk

>>220714410
don't like you objectifying them like that

>>220714396
our PJ would clear im afraid

>>220714409
I'm doing my part

>>220714366
I like it when you watch these social experiments, if you look into them, only a handful of attempts go well enough to use. for the majority of them, the people involved realize it's a social experiment just due to the combination of the contrived situation, the instructions they've been given, how it doesn't all really add up to what they're supposedly in for but how it might serve some other use, and so then obviously it's some kind of social experiment. not that they then try to ruin it, but the smile of realization on their face comes and then the observers know it's over, the results won't matter anymore. this happens about 80% of the time, so the social experiments we use as data actually all come from the least observant, stupidest participants. just thought this was interesting information.

Wait is pj harvey not that bloke from east 17 who ran himself over in his own car?
Who am I thinking of

got a quite unremarkable willy

>>220714490
no mate that was brian from westlife

>>220714432
sorry, I'll do better

>>220714490
PJ Harvey is a woman

>>220714490
i believe that's brian harvey

>>220714512
not really good enough though is it. think you should start by taking out a full page in the guardian for a public apology

>>220714512
that's good :)

really don't like sam hyde

>>220714490
youre thinking of americas greatest gameshow host who regularly falls to the ground in shock when someone says penis

>>220714503
He was definitely east 17 I remember seeing him and remembering his daft hat and face and dancing
I think he had loads of earrings

>>220714522
THANK YOU
brian
only a brian could run himself over in his own car

>>220714553
get a better sense of humour

>>220714490
Brian Harvey
He ran himself over because he ate too many jacket potatoes (he claims '4 large ones' which were covered with cheese, tuna AND mayonnaise), opened his car door fully to throw up while reversing out of his drive, forgot he wasn't wearing a seatbelt and fell out, slipping underneath the tyres
The hilarious image of it has lived with me for years

PJ and Duncan Harvey off byker grove

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>ran himself over because he ate too many jacket potatoes

>>220714584
yeah, I agree, he should

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>>220714599
It's not funny

Just realised the RE4Remake came out 3 years ago
What
The
Fuck

didn't know we had 40 year olds posting here

>>220714599
You have to assume that this was actually a drug or drink driving mishap and this was just the excuse he came up with. Sheer comedy of it stopped anyone looking into it any further.

>>220714644
Just remembered how utterly shit it was compared to the original

Going to be two million of us in London come May

It's finally fucking happening

>>220714645
you'd be surprised lad

>>220714660
Oh, I agree

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>>220714127
italian ass is important

>>220714645
you thought young people still post on this dead millennial website? if i was posting here at 19 i would genuinely kill myself lmao what are you doing

>>220714660
it was alright

>>220714665
gathering of the incels is it?

>>220714268
Screamimn this is me

>>220714627
yeah and here you are sperging out over LE JACKET POTATOS XD

>>220714679
>if i was posting here at 19 i would genuinely kill myself
It's just a website unc, stop being so dramatic.

rorke's mum is cool and she will treat you riiight

wonder what happened to that lad who lost his hearing in one ear

>>220714702
SCREAMINHG

>>220714720
you are wasting your life away young man

was angry at Axel Rudabakhana but didn't realise he had a mental elf
all is forgiven

>>220714708
Haven't posted about jacket potatos once in this thread.

never once called it a jacket potato I have and will always say baked potato

>>220714493
as with people it's not how the willy seems that makes him remarkable but what he's done. which I suppose isn't much of a pep talk for you aha

>>220714553
He looks very jewish.

the middle aged unk who is insecure about how the state of his life is here again getting angry at zoomers

>>220714732
stop being so dramatic unc

You talk retarded and your shits all fucked up

BAKED POTATO CHANGED MY LIFE

zoomers devolving in to children again when someone tells him to grow up (hes reaching 25 this year)

>>220714754
ktim but I don't get angry at zoomers

find it quite funny that everyone in mde doesn't realise how old and cringe they all are now

>>220714754
Same guy who was getting angry arguing about air fryers and cookers in the last thread btw

remember that time in big brother where they called rosie baked potato for the entire series

that was mildly amusing
good times

im only 26 bro im still a kid

there is literally no such thing as wasted time, you can be as productive as you want, you're still going to be worm food one day lmao

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would you eat Brazilian style pizza

>>220714770
he's a baybeh he's a baybeh

>>220714798
most intelligent nihilist

>>220714798
the shut in zoomer cope

>>220714801
I will scran any pizza, that one looks nice

>>220714801
egg on a pizza?
genuinely don't know how I feel about that

yeah theres no such thing as a wasted life

*lays in bed naked all day wanking to deranged japanese pornography*

>>220714833
fiorentina is the kinoest pizza out there

Right, you lot, listen up and proper, some of you have been calling me a mong and all that and I'm not going to stand for it, pack it in yeah, because its offensive to people with disabilities and all that, so pack it in right now

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why do middle class white people love this little cunt
you won't see any paddington fans on a council estate on Brixton I promise you that

>>220714816
If it is such an obviously unintelligent post, you should be able to easily refute it :)
>>220714818
Literally all human behaviour is cope.

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>there is literally no such thing as wasted time, you can be as productive as you want, you're still going to be worm food one day lmao

>>220714259
Lynchian

>>220714754
Not that anon and Im 44. Glad I didn't waste my youth on here fucking hell. Just sat staring at a screen instead of going to pubs and clubs and house parties and taking drugs and that.

What stories are you going to reminisce about with your pals when you get to my age? Hey remember the time we sat reading about cronem and hey remember bradley walsh pictures haha

>>220714490
Youre thinking of pj and duncan

wfh toil is over for the day so now I can just chill and do whatever I want and get paid for it

amazing feeling 2bh

>>220714850
it's safe british

>>220714833
never had cheese and egg on bread with tomato in some form my lad? it's actually perfectly common if you PONDER upon it
>but the form matters
DOES it though?

25 year old zaydon calling men 5 years older than him uncle again

>>220714868
used to think this was good but I actually hate being couped up in my room all day having to be at the laptop like

sometimes i get bored and open up my container of mints to have a sniff

>>220714801
I'd eat it but I'd much prefer a normal one

>>220714861
they wont like this post

>someone actually made a six hour BWC documentary
looool

>>220714838
>>220714855
name a worthwhile activity

>>220714861
It’s a weekday Monday afternoon, unc. Sounds more like you’re lamenting your own wasted youth by projecting onto us if I’m going to be perfectly honest with you

right then *jumps to my death*

>>220714850
it's a heart-warming story of an immigrant bear who gets into a bit of mischief and likes sandwiches and is a perfect immigration good argument for them

>>220714833
Egg on a pizza is great, especially when the yolk is still runny, gives you something to mop up with the crust

>>220714890
Don’t sit in your room all day then? Lmao you can work from anywhere you want. I work outside on nice days or in the conservatory, go to a coffee shop, Spoons, etc.

>>220714909
learning a skill and utilising it to make money and be successful

>>220714553
What was the name of that painfully unfunny youtube "prankster" who had a name like sam hyde

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*nasally Kier voice*

These times are uncertain, but we will always have our principles. The British Values that guide us, that we live by, that shape our shared destiny. I will not allow those values to be threatened in a world where national security, and how we organise collective defence efforts with our allies, risks being undermined by adversaries, and alliances brought into question. Today, I am announcing the largest increase in defence spending of any parliament since the second world war. Over the next five years we will spend an additional £120bn on defence, expanding the size of our armed forces at home and at sea. I am also pleased to announce an expansion to our UK Carrier Strike Group with the building of another Queen Elizabeth class aircraft carrier: HMS Rorke.

when i was at uni i bought some condoms just to try on and wasn't a fan to be honest

>>220714801
No they put this weird sauce on instead of cheese. Always looks grim

>>220714932
why is that worthwhile?

>>220714853
>there is literally no such thing as wasted time
wasted time is a human construct
it necessarily exists because humans exist and have values and preferences
what you mean to say is that there is no objective or transcendent notion of wasted time

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>Im 44
unk could have been in the same year at school as my dad

>>220714909
Worthwhile according to who?
You get to decide what is worth and what isn't precisely because life is meaningless, you're supposed to be empowered by it and trace your own path.

>>220714959
because it leads to success

pepperoni + stilton + franks hot sauce = best pizza

>>220714920
I mean thats the recent narrative taken up by politicians. Doesnt stand up to any kind of scrutiny though

>>220714947
You could genuinely write Kier's scripts for him this is scarily accurate.

>>220714977
so you can buy yourself a better room in which to wank yourself silly over anime?

'cohol bought on the 'ber 'ts

>>220714973
Mad that your dad got bullied by rorke

OMG IS THAT A REFUGEE EATING TOAST AND MARMALADE!? OPEN BORDERS NOOOOWWWWW

>>220714962
That's an obvious implication m80
>>220714975
Exactly my point
>>220714977
Define succeed and why I should care about it.

>>220714910
Yeah my youth was wasted in a lot of ways and so is this time, but I had a life off 4chan. You're here forever, and that includes your prime. I'll always have fun times to look back on. You never will if you get hooked on the 4chan young.

>>220715005
bought on the what what?

>>220715006
My dad was a shagger in his youth, just like I am now. Nobody bullied either of us lol

Spend my early to mid 20s going out clubbing and doing class A drugs a lot. Great times. Pre-covid life. You and your mates starting to earn a bit, confidence of grown adults but still had the youth about you. Could recover quickly. It falls apart around 27 years old though when people start getting married and having kids.

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screaming at this book cover

>>220715022
the 'ber 'ts
wee brown fella conscriptionator

>>220715008
Success is optimal contentment for you personally so you will always care to succeed

remove the margaret thatcher that lives in your head and just enjoy the things you enjoy and stop feeling guilty because you aren't 'muh productive'

>>220715029
screaming are you
or howling too, I bet
at the top of your lungs I suppose

>>220714973
Would rather be chatting on here with your dad 2bh

>>220715058
im more lost than i was before

>>220715014
I’m literally posting here during my WFH hours mate, I do plenty of stuff but I work full time so I just chill during these quiet hours (and get paid for it)

>>220715025
my dad was a nonce his first girlfriend was 16 when he was 19
he doesn't like it when you bring it up

>>220715062
Was going to carry on doing the smug Socratic thing, but I genuinely liked this answer.

bacon and eggs is the best meal in the world

>>220715008
>That's an obvious implication m80
not what you said is it? also a completely meaningless statement because anyone talking about wasted time or how you should spend time is obviously doing so with reference to their own values

>>220715058
ah I see. you're using a friendly contraction of uber eats in an attempt to hide from the fact you're funding rape gangs and people trafficking.

>>220714855
kahtim kahtim kahtim

>>220715072
yeah, you got me, I just exhaled a little bit more out my nose than usual

>>220715089
Hows that being a nonce?

just asked my mum if it's my turn to be based but she said no

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.>>220715102
Nah. Pancakes with butter and a side of bacon. Eggs are minging

>>220715125
cos she was 16 mate

>>220715085
As long as you're not on here in your free time you're alright

>>220715025
Ofc mate :)

>>220715142
That legal
x

>>220715142
So? Are you american or something

Its giving incel. Its giving chronic masturbation. It's giving smeggy bedroom. Its giving living at home with mum.

>>220715136
Pancakes contain egg thoughbeit

>>220715028
Sad when you're in your 30s and mates start falling off because they're alcoholics and drug addicts. Either they have to go sober which is weird or they just get too into it and it's embarrassing to be around them. Weird dynamic when you're trying to have a quiet pint with some mates, someone's brought their new baby along and someone's doing lines in the toilet every half hour and getting in everyone's face.

>>220715136
he is perfectly adapted to the Australian environment, makes perfect sense why he's such a good runner
compare with white people who just die without aircon

top 10 sexiest anime schoolgirls

>>220715108
It isn't a completely meaningless statement because everyone else who is participating in the sophistic engagement you are perfectly understood the point. Off you fuck, tedious bore.

>>220715197
All mine are normal people that live normal lives. Dont know anyone whos a drug addict or alcoholic

bump pls frens
>>220715143
>>220715143
>>220715143

>>220715200
all me

shit I just realised I've got the air purifier on and the window open

>>220715226
no x

>>220715253
Cretin. You've absolutely fucked that up havent you? Take a look at yourself get a fucking grip

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After I graduated I had two or three mates, then covid hit and people started moving away and getting gfs and now I've basically been friendless for 5 years

Don't really know where I go from here. Don't have any hobbies and my back is fucked so I can't do much exercise, I know I'm wasting my life and I feel powerless to change it

just found out there was a motorstorm for ps2

>>220715253
grow up

>>220715253
Not sure what the point of this post was. Certainly cant have been to be interesting or entertain

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Sup lads

I'm back :(

No one earning £40k (me) should start monday with 40 emails in their inbox after clearing it on Friday. What the fuck is going on here.

Bob Mortimer is proper funny

>>220715280
>Don't really know where I go from here.
yes you do. you're just a pathetic self-loathing man of inaction too frightened to do it.

I've seen a lot of evidence for the black people and the low battery fire alarms phenomenon

What's up with that?

>>220715309
Get in the fucking sea

>>220715203
it is a meaningless statement. everyone that replied to you is arguing the point from the universal non-spasticated sentient human being perspective of what the term 'wasted time' actually means while you pretend like anyone believes there is an objective standard and then endlessly ask 'why?' to every argument like a child
>sophistic engagement
pipe down you pseud

>>220715327
i have 10 emails from today all of which i know i don't need to read or respond to just based on the title

eating dark chocolate spread with peanut butter and drizzled with honey

>>220715348
I did do a cold swim on Sunday morning.

>>220715327
I had 3 emails today
One from nationwide
One from smoke-king.co.uk
One from world of books

>>220715342
the leftypol cope is that they all live in rented accommodation so aren't allowed to do things like change batteries

What do the welsh eat?

>>220715342
low in conscientiousness

>>220715384
Leftypol with no backbone

>>220715396
I had a bagel this morning before I left but I didn’t have any butter left so I just ate it plain

>>220715361
fatty bum bum

>>220715298
Count the (You)s baby

Great auntie is in hospice lads, the end is within days apparently.

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>>220715396
her pussy

>>220715384
God be like
>noo don't do thatuhhhhh

ca lie man don like de de english coosine you get me

>>220715452
If she's so great how come she's dying

>The Inbetweeners returning for a brand-new film at Netflix.
Will it be woke?

>>220715479
94 years old
decent innings desu

my shite aunt is still alive and well unfortunately

Wish I had a UK flag so I could samefag

>>220715508
if you make a few posts about gay porn or opiates people will assume it's all gaybruce posting and you can be free to act as you like

>great aunt
Alright posho

afro pussy SAVED rorke

was THIS close to buying poppers but then I read about someone who did them once and fingers, toes and lips went purple and they had to go to the hospital so I’ve put it on ice for now

>>220715555
Never happened

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>>220715555

Hello lads
Hope you're having a wonderful nigger free day

>>220715559
Which part

might sit with my legs crossed like a poof for a bit

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rorke going to hospital for follow-up care following plastic surgery

>>220715574
I was until a brown man knocked on my door a few minutes ago to deliver some absolute SHITE my girlfriend ordered off amazon

>>220715603
Get a job

>>220715502
Cor hope I live that long (provided I'm happy and healthy throughout)

>>220715582
wonder how much of that is hair transplants
98%?

>>220715582
His penis enlargment surgery clearly hasn't gone as planned

>>220715458
wouldn't mind dipping my french fry in her curry sauce if you catch my drift
>>220715501
of course
>>220715574
hello, you too lad, II took tomorrow off as well

>>220715582
>procreative management
Is that a euphemism for abortion?

>>220715582
0 men admitted for pregnancy-related matters. It's time for us to change that

>>220715624
Perpetual bergé machine

>>220715458
imagine the smell

>>220715661
Could be the opposite.

>>220715578
None of it

>>220715658
Hi Bulgarian anon

no homo but Jensen Ackles is really handsome

>>220715658
>my french fry
FOY

IRN BRU

dry shave BAD idea

throoughly wasting my life shitpoisnt gon the internet
putting off work
and abusing alcohol (cos only with half a bottle of vodka in me can i properly engage with people)
the girl i kinda like is ghosting me after a messy drunken hook up asw ell

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!!!!!!

>new like on bumble
>it's a deafblind girl in a wheelchair
Well at least I won't be judged on my appearance or squeaky voice then
Her profile says she knows BSL, not sure how that would work given she's blind, or how she even manages the profile at all, how the fuck would I even ask her this

>>220715730
Those were the days

>>220715730
Already raged in the Instagram comments at this don’t need to do it again here

saw a fucking bloke walking about in one of those juicy tracksuits earlier

>>220715764
just don't like her back?

why didn't they make starfield good?

>>220715822
Starfieldlad...could you comment?

just put rorke out to pasture

>>220715822
i told Todd to make it bad on purpose because i didn't want to play it

in the sewer all alone

>>220715749
>microwave
>crispy

>>220715852
:)

Post images that go hard

>>220715865
they are quite crispy for microwave chips desu

>>220715852
This is the neo nazi far right party youve heard so much about

>>220715873
Yeah still more soggy than you'd like but not bad for microwave

>>220715841
he went completely silent quite literally the day of release. i hope the smug wanker deeply regretted his purchase

mad that people used to just sit around listening to the radio

>>220715852
leftypol went very quiet with the fascist accusations after this

>>220715892
yeah now they just listen to morons shitpost on the 4chan instead

>>220715704
Hi lad, how are you
>>220715716
don't know what that means sir

>>220714228
baldie!

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consider the yellowhammer

>>220715764
might have a friend helping her, you can learn languages when you're deaf and blind through Braille

>>220715852
heh, leftypol, dont ya feel dumb now? the pakis are on RORKE'S SIDE NOW!

Good afternoon

>>220715937
*considers it*
ok now what

>>220715914
he'll just harass him while hurling insults like coconut at him. this is despite calling himself an anti-racist lol

We didn’t have Sunday dinner yesterday so my mum is doing it today let’s fucking go

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>>220715871

Should I tell my employer that I am mentally unwell

>>220715937
Considered it. It's a bird not a hammer.

>>220715943
youve done everything you need to so the rest of the day is yours to do what you want with

>>220715951
Andrew Tate killing people with voodoo magic now?

I hate the aesthetic of the era we live in

>>220715951
He’s actually wearing Tate merch aswell how can such handsome chad be such a faggot

might have a third cup of coffee

>>220716017
this but bottle of lager

rorke commenting 'well said' under every raw egg nationalist tweet

>>220715899
Terror of the Autons?

>>220715946
Um how can leftypol be racist if all he ever thinks about is racial differences and how to be an ally for the good races and fight against the evil races?

>>220716031
im not incellious enough to know what that is

>>220716037
imagine knowing that

burped and it tasted like pesto

>>220716050
well said

you lot need to get jobs
>im working from home!!!
Sure bro… get a fucking job

>>220716068
i'm on my holiday

>>220716050
outed yourself as an unc

>>220716037
Tranny

>>220716057
Spaino

I am an insignificant worm

>>220716068
i'm literally working from home and making a lot more than my last restaurant job

>>220716068
I work shifts as an essential worker in healthcare x

>>220716082
i think in reality you just spend too much time online.

>>220716098
im a cat

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woke won't like this

>>220716111
lot of calories on those meals

>>220716121
corr sautee that up with a bit of kale

>>220716118
bore off

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>>220716070

>>220716121
I would bite into it like an apple

get it made

Bad day to be the last segment of cadburys fruit and nut bar in my fridge

yeah cos chocolate needs to be kept in the fridge

>>220716193
fruit and nut is that you and me haha

>>220716193
gayest flavour that

the poo

>>220716210
>>220716210
>>220716210

>>220716111
bet it absolutely fucking reeks of sweaty bollocks in that room

>>220716111
right let's see their willies

>>220716151
rattled

>>220716068
last semester of uni lad, your post doesnt apply to me until june

>>220716055
>>220716083
i was right though