https://youtu.be/vNR-ZebJvd0?si=AqrOXbHq77dcxN-A Now this is proper slop. Nothing better than watching FutaBoys shoveling cheap conveyer belt sushi down their gullets and watch as they get stuck in their seats
>>257407 It's all gluttony, cooking, hair dressing, foot stamping, and chest lending. They can't show the alcoholism and sexual assault on youtube without being demonetized.
Its hilarious how there are zero Yoshinofuji fans crowing about his victory and its all just Dan haters who are happy about it. Yosh has had an amazing career so far and is on his way to his 12 consecutive KK following him maushita tsukedashi debut and he was college yokozuna before that, the guy is an Onosato level sumo monster, but nobody gives a shit, they only know him as that dude who can beat Dan. And his back and shoulders are wide enough to land a 747 on them
>>257523 seeing all that green on the natto graphic before those two clashed was unreal. neither of them have ever failed to earn promotion when the new banzuke comes out.
>>257934 absolute disgrace. first he gets smothered by aonishiki previous basho, and he loses this one to kirishima, who now has more yusho than him, and he isnt even yokozuna...
>>257955 stfu retard, I am rooting for hosh since he joined sanyaku but I never wanted him to be promoted to yoko; this basho is another proof NSK made a mistake promoting him. Asashoryu isn't even caring anymore as well, tweeting about aonishiki instead.
The ups and downs seem pretty set in stone this time.
>Makuuchi Midori and Fujiryogre out Ryuden and Wakanosho in >Juryo Kotokuzan, Fujitensei, Shimazuumi, and Tsurugisho out Tochitaikai, Hakuyozan, Okaryu, and Enho in
>Hosh arm locks Dan in practice >Dan gets offended or whatever and refuses to practice more >Hosh beats Dan for the first time with an arm lock (into leg hook because Dan forces it) throw Dan sisters...
>>257982 Probably. They tend to cushion people from rising or falling too fast these days. Gooneryama went 1-14 from M3 and landed at M13. What I wanna know is why the fuck people think Papa will stay at S1w. It makes more sense to give Waka a +0.5 boost than to give Papa a +1 boost. The only real awkwardness is going to come from that extra Ozeki slot messing up relative placement since everyone's getting a -0.5 rank shift from it.
>>257976 >Zak double digits Zak winning against Hosh was probably the highlight match of the entire Basho. Hosh will NEVER win a Yusho as Yokozuna. NEVER. And deep down, he knows it.
>>258007 He'll probably be roundabout 13 east Hopefully he still has some juice in him. He looked bad early on, but he at least showed some spirit in some lf the losses later. He's still in range of dropping to juryo though, and I could see him hanging up his belt if he does because he hasn't dropped division in 15 years.
>>258036 He's been my main guy since I started watching a few years back and he had some really impressive wins that time. Stuck with him through some ups and downs but this time was rough. I still hope he comes back and finally Yushos. When we first started watching, my bro picked Takakeisho and he ended up Yushoing that time around (and he moved on to maining Hoshoryu when Keisho retired and got another Yusho and a Yokozuna), and my friend picked Kirishima and he won the one after I think it was, now two. I'm still holding out hope for my guy to Yusho.
Let's be real, if Hosh had won this basho you'd still call him a fraud because there was no real competition or some bullshit. Glad he finally figured out Dan to.
>>258043 No one has figured out Dan he’s just tired from putting up only double digits since his debut it would take years for these guys to catch up to his level of grappling
>>258045 >constantly hard-slap him since the tachi-ai >win EVERY FUCKING TIME This is as bad as Onosato losing to the Nodowa, you dumbass. Either Dan overcomes and adapts to this or he's done for.
>>258045 Bro even hosh instantly stood him up and didn't allow him to go low for the rest of the match. Dan needs to train on different shit, he doesn't have the retard strength Ono does, he can't just bowl people over.
Does Hakkaku personally hate Hoshoryu or something? It's so weird to see a chairman heap tons of criticism on who's supposed to be the sport's crown jewel.
>>258083 I don't know but it's not hard to see why. The man is actually doing ok on average but he just can't get a yusho. Hakkaku probably thinks the only way to change that is to push him through harsh words. And I actually do agree with some of the criticism, Hoshoryu needs to learn patience, sometime it feels like he just shows up and does whatever and it just happens to work, for the most part.
>>258091 I wonder whether it has something to do with how transparent most things are these days. If your underling does better than you in a basho you can't beat the shit out of him as easily anymore or something like that? Aren't there a lot of social rules where upstaging a superior is a huge taboo in japan?
>>258093 >Maybe don't promote guys to Yokozuna so early then I’d push back on that idea. There is no such thing as promoting someone too early. There’s only correctly promoted or incorrectly.
Onosato won two in a row from ozeki and was correctly promoted. Takakeisho went 12-3 JY + 13-2 Y and was correctly not promoted. Hoshoryu went 13-2 JY + 12-3 Y and was INcorrectly promoted.
Time has nothing to do with it, they simply fucked up.
I still firmly hold my belief that they intentionally promoted Hoshoryu just to get rid of him early so he won't get citizenship in time and become another mongol oyakata in NSK
>Kirishitma didn't have time to get into his formal cloak, hence why he rode the car in his underpants >This is only the 3rd time someone has re-made Ozeki without using the 10 win Sekiwake rule >Hakkaku was re-elected as Chairman today and ranted about Hosh like a cranky old fuck
>>258103 Chiyonofuji won that basho with a 15-0. Hakkaku’s point is that a healthy yokozuna should elevate the competition so that a 12-3 win a cup.
If there’s a healthy yokozuna and someone else bags a 12-3 yusho, that is pretty mediocre, let’s be honest, since it means you either gave up some cheap gold stars or you completely pooped your mawashi against the sanyaku. Neither is really what you’d expect from a Yokozuna.
Desu I wanna hear his opinions on Onokuni. Surely he must have nothing but praise for a guy competing at the same time as himself, right? >2 yusho >Plethora of juns Right?
>>258099 >Chris (((Gould))) should meet me at my stable instead of talking shit on YouTube, Chairman Hakkaku told Nikkan Sports. Despite being a cranky old fuck, he could still snap the YouTuber in half like the twig he is, he added.
>Never lost his ozeki rank once he earned it >Consistently put up double digit wins in most basho's he's been in >But he's bad because no basho zuna wins The chairman and the horse schizo need to collide with a dohyo neck first, preferably at high speeds.
>>258130 >>258130 Sorry dude but we won't be seeing a white yokozuna anytime soon, he is out, should have been fighting for his country instead to be more useful
>>258159 Apparently no primary source on that one, but it does seem plausible. If that's all it is, he should be fine for the next basho. IMO, it would be worse if he just choked.
>>258168 Yes. Personal appearance is part of the terms of their employment. The same reason they wear their hair in the old style.
They’re obviously allowed to wear other clothes like if they’re going to the gym or something, but when they’re out in public, they’re expected to dress appropriately.
Asashoryu would frequently get yelled at by the JSA because he preferred to wear a suit and his hair in a ponytail instead of the chonmage.
>>258169 >>258172 I just remember old Futa videos where they're just lounging around in casual wear then all the sudden they're wearing yukatas all the time.
>>258179 Seeing as he’s got other responsibilities, I’m guessing that the day-to-day operation and training are probably overseen by Takamisakari, Okinoumi, and Hokutoumi.
>>258161 Imagine if Aonishiki never quite captures lightning in a bottle again and becomes the only wrestler to ever win two yusho in a row but never become yokozuna.*
*Terunofuji did it but was promoted later. Tamanishiki, Futabayama, and Chiyonoyama, were all before the modern era (and later made it anyway.) Raiden is ancient history.
>Two chicken breasts >Two egg noodle nests with onions sauce and enough olive oil to stop them sticking I'll never make it to Onosato's size with meals like this...
So I thought I knew this but this basho makes me question what I know: during a match I thought touching the hair was a no-no but I saw several matches where a wrestler won by pushing against the neck/back of head area. Is it you just can't pull the hair and everything else is fair game?
>>258195 >>258196 This. An easy thing the judges look for is if the fingers close. Simply getting your fingers tangled in the hair is not enough to be a DQ.
If Aonishiki won this basho on 12-3, would there have been people up his ass like Hoshoryu because he got promoted on a seemlingly weak result? Like imagine he went back to the 11-4 mines afterwards. I wonder what the narrative would've been like.
>>258201 Back to back yusho is back to back yusho, it's like one of the few YDC rules that's actually written in stone instead of a vague benchmark. I think people are just going to need to readjust their expectations of what a yokozuna is back to the "ozeki with a fancy entrance" it used to be.
>>258203 I know he would've been promoted no matter what if he won both, I just was pondering what the narrative would've been like afterwards. There probably would've been expectations for him to start doing better than 11 and 12. Like you said, people get very serious about what a zuna should be doing in a tournament.
>>258205 > Like you said, people get very serious about what a zuna should be doing in a tournament. They should be. Calling someone a Yokozuna means you’re announcing that they are an all-time great WHILE they’re still active. No other sport does that. It’s a huge black eye when they get it wrong.
Instead of back-to-back yusho with a vague and nebulous "yusho-equivalent" standard, they should make it simple and award yokozuna title to an ozeki who has won his 3rd or higher yusho. There would only be slightly fewer yokozuna (44 vs. 52 since yushos were created) and it would be a sign of longer term success.
>>258183 >anti-Danner schizos and their rich fantasy lives imagine being so butthurt that you unironically spend your time inventing fantasies about Dan having a bad career
>>258209 Tochiazuma too. I think it's telling that a lot of ozeki were able to get that many individual yusho, but weren't able to get over the "back to back" hump. It's telling of that era of competition, because them and Konishiki would've been the only additions in the entire six basho era, with four cuts.
>>258242 Youre right, I messed up the query here >>258239 It didn't happen from 1960 until 2005, then it happened multiple times in the past couple years. shishi and tokihayate went from m17 to m18 though, and this past banzuke had no m18, so not sure how affects it
>>258235 No one, 4 guys dropping out, Tochitaikai Hakuyozan and Okaryu are definitely in, and Enho's 5-2 is like 11-4 compared to Takakento's 4-3 which is like 9-6, so mathmatically Enho is 1 rank above him so Enho goes to Juryo and Takakento just needs 1 more winning record.
>>258238 Technically he's going from 41st to 42nd. Either way that guy's banzuke is whack because Kotoshoho is not getting Sekiwake. The guy hasn't had a KK in the joi in over five years of trying.
>>258266 Nothing is ever confirmed, but it’s widely speculated that he wants to remain on as an elder. Hakuho would have been able to secure a share for him (the same way he did with Ishiura, thus keeping the valuable pipeline to Tottori Johoku open).
Now that Hakuho is gone, though, and the former Asahifuji is sitting on the Miyagino share until he’s 70, getting a share will be harder. I don’t know how many potential shares there are available in the Isegahama ichimon.
>>258260 >KogaGOYama lmao when your kwab stable's most noteworthy wrestler is goddamned Koga and your sekitori's name is a contraction of "Russian Koga"
>>258270 >>258271 It seems like there is still a ton of back room wheeling and dealing when it comes to elder stock even though they say you’re not supposed to auction it off to the highest bidder anymore. I would imagine that if Enho was able to pay the blood price isegahama/miyagino would give it up. I think a big hang up for Enho will be the shadow of Hakuho and the jsa not wanting him to have a backdoor into the sumo world. The other problem is that you can only establish a new beya if you were a zuna or ozeki or have a bunch of bashos at maegashira. So the only option for Enho would be resurrecting miyagino but they may consider it to be a dissolved stable since Hakuho quit. I do think the isegahama drama with Teru will help him though because it doesn’t seem like they want to boot him from the jsa so the most logical solution would be reestablishing miyagino to get hakuoho and the other guys out of there and make it seem like they are doing something to solve the problem.
>>258277 The dream situation would be Miyagino taking over Isegahama temporarily while Teru learns how to be a better stablemaster from him. God that would be the funniest shit. Give Enho any other kabu who gives a fuck, Musashimaru will probably be dead soon there you go.
>>258271 Enho isn't about to retire now that he got back to salaryman status, its his time to start banking away them big bucks again. He has been solid enough in upper makushita that he should be able to handle juryo well enough to stay in the division barring injury. He can just make money until age forces Asahifuji to give up the kabu.
>>258288 Does Enho even want the Miyagino kabu? Inheriting the legacy of Hakuho is a big deal, especially for a former Hakuho deshi. Asahifuji can do it because he was a Yokozuna, but Enho? Nah, he'd much rather have a less-known kabu.
Ctrl+F "196", receive list of cunts about to retire. Also they should make kabu of zuna shikona who broke 20 yusho. I guarantee you that the original owners of the kabu shikona would've bitch slapped Hakkaku for being a faggot.
>>258275 Futagoyama could realistically have 4 sekitori before long since Nobehara could join Roga, Nabbers, and Mita. That would put him as well above average as an oyakata.
>>258290 Kogatame will likely land in the makushita teens somewhere on the next banzuke and then his knees will self destruct against if he makes Juryo, he just isn't built for 15 straight days of competition, in fact he isn't built for straight anything. And he has no knees, not even one
The results of this last basho only strengthens and reinvigorates my admiration for and support of Dan. Anyone can be a Dan fan when he is rewriting the recordbook, but only the most devoted Dan admirers will stick with him in troubled times. Osaka reminds my of back in November when Dan fell to one off the yusho pace after his win over Onosato was stolen from him by the azn officialdom. The fair weather Danfans all gave up by the true faithful all still knew he'd be taking home the cup. Dan's rise to dai yokozuna legendary status is still as inevitable as the rising of the sun in the morning. Anti-danners will be tormented until 2040 or later at the hands of Dan, bank on it.
>>258295 his wins against Kirishima and Kotozakura were good, especially the former I recall he was getting his arms locked in and got a hold from the inside so it shows he's working on a solution. Even though the dream was busted early he still gave an exciting narrative trying to dodge the MK and the grudge bout between him and Hosh putting him in kadoban. Still gonna be someone I enjoy watching.
>>258301 Being on every single major Japanese TV show over the past 4 months and having a hundred parties and parades thrown in his honor was way too much distraction from Dan's training routine. Maybe Dan needs to do a face heel turn so he won't be so popular and can focus more on working out, that move worked wonders for Hakuho
>>258289 You are making a large amount of assumptions. The A kabu doesn't get somehow tainted or changed by who held it. Miyagino historically has been held by Low Maegashira and Juryo since 1989 up until Hakuho. EX Asahifuji being a yokozuna has no bearing on anything other than he was available to hold it after he passed Isegahama to Teru. Furthermore there was a system called Ishidai Toshiyori, which would allow for a Single use share under the name of an exceptional yokozuna, to be retired when they retire from coaching. Only Taiho, Kitanoumi, Takanohana, and Chiyonofuji were ever offered this. In 2021 it was expected from Hakuho to also receive this honor. The YDC then decided, "uh no we don't have this system", source https://www.asahi.com/articles/ASP4M5V91P4MUTQP00J.html >>258271 Asahifuji has also publicly expressed his desire to pass the Miyagino Kabu back to one of Hakuho's disciples with the aim of reopening Miyagino Stable.
But no, none of these things allow for drama fueled shitposting. The pure conjecture regularly posted in these threads is absolutely fucking newfags.
>>258310 I don't mind Kirishima winning. I just hate it when a basho fucking sucks. A 12-3Y with no playoff is already suspect, but when it's locked in day 13 because the Yokozuna can't contend it and the winner shits the bed days 14 and 15 that's just some weak shit my dude.
>>258311 >I just hate it when a basho fucking sucks Sure a more exciting end to the basho would have been better, that's about all I can agree on. We got to watch some great fucking sumo and I enjoyed all 15 days. Great basho personally. Just love watching some sumo, results, storylines, and records are all nice things which will elevate in some cases. But I don't require those things to enjoy watching sumo.
But nah, gotta say everything sucks and be unhappy instead.
Last two years were the first time this century that Japs won the majority of the bashoes. Onosato needs to kick it into gear and dominate like everyone knows he can until the end of the year to keep that streak going. Can't depend on the Kotoshohos & Takerufujis of the world to help out, that dai yokozuna energy everyone know Onosato has needs to be turned on at full power every day. He can win six in a year if he applies himself to his game instead of derping around hazing the juniors with anal sake chugs
>>258316 Zak’s father was a stand up dude he could’ve killed uncs dumb ass they call these in favor of the guy that puts his hand down to prevent injury now
>>258348 Not against a zuna. There's an unwritten rule that a close call for the maegashira winner becomes a torinaoshi and what should be a torinaoshi a win for the zuna
>>258304 > In 2021 it was expected from Hakuho to also receive this honor. The YDC then decided, "uh no we don't have this system" Blame Takanohana for that.
>>258356 At least now he lets the viewer know when the conjecture starts. I am also glad he skipped the Hakuho comparison this time as the cases are really not comparable.
>>258356 >extremely biased As opposed to the usual? He usually kept himself in check, but since London he's been ramping up the propaganda machine (him being more audibly upset at things)
The first Pocari Sweat adverts featuring Dan are coming out now. They gave Dan a pile of money banking on him being yokozuna now and Dan spent it all on salo & potatoes and then went 7-8 is well on his way to becoming a Gagamaru tier fatass lower mægashira shitter. Imagine the Pocari Sweat boardroom meetings when Dan's collapse kills their brand.
Teru needs to learn to do something about his hair, that disorganized rat's nest on top of his head looks like crap. Its disrespectful of him to go out looking like that, bad for sumo's reputation. He just rolled out of bed hung over and just got dressed and went out without even looking in the mirror, probably didn't brush his teeth either. And Iseghama boasts a top tier tokoyama too
Iseghama's beyaslop channel has been turned off, they probably got told to stop publishing new slop due to the stable's impending name change when Kiriyama is crowned new master
>>258334 > Enho won't make a good oyakata, all he knows are ultra manlet techniques At this level, every wrestler knows every technique and ways to defend against them. They’re not going to use them in the ring if that’s not their style.
A good coach will be able to help a wrestler identify his strengths and weaknesses and build around that no matter if they’re 160cm 100kg or 200cm 200kg.
>>258382 Sorry, I'm with the Chris schizo theories on this one. They will just slap him on the wrists+ salary cut, maybe split the Miyagino wrestlers from him.
>>258365 I miss the old Chris when he did interesting vids and shit like autistic deep dives and the full 15, before he realised his name is (((Gould))) and he could monetise crying about Hakuho on his schizo gossip rag of a washed channel. >>258382 Takarafuji taking over would be so kino.
>>258383 >They’re not going to use them in the ring if that’s not their style. It's a competitive sport, anon. No one is going to lose on purpose because this or that kimarite is "not their style". Styles develop because they tend to give a particular rikishi the best chance at winning. >>258334 went too far in the other direction, though. All kabu-eligible sekitori know the basics well enough to bring anyone with actual talent to juryo at least. They are aware of techniques outside their style, but knowing a technique exists is not the same as knowing how to perform it or teach it to someone. A good oyakata would supplant his teachings with those of someone more specialized in whatever the rikishi's sumo style is.
>>258382 Beyaslops channels are in very volatile position. One scandal and its all fucking over. Imagine if its revealed that someone in FutaGOYama is actually gluing wallets. All that work down the drain
>>258389 They already survived the Nabatranny scandal. FutaGOYama is going to end up regretting not kicking Nabatranny out after that shameful episode, its inevitably going to get repeated at en even worse degree.
Anyone know a way to look up historical locations of stable buildings? I was dicking around looking around real estate listings and there's a place in Kashiwa for rent that was very obviously a former stable, but there's no indication from the listing or Street View which one it used to be.
>>258392 Niggatame has really matured a lot. He is a lot more reserved on the slop channel. When he makes it to makuuchi I expect you to post your apology here on /xs/ so I can accept it for him.
>>258423 Hokuseiho actually glued peoples' wallets shut before he got kicked out. It wasn't the sole reason for being kicked out, but it was part of the overall "being a fucking shitbrain" reason.
>>258432 Hukoseiho could've earned a decent amount of money for 10+ years as a perennial M10 by literally doing nothing but standing tall and not getting moved by manlets. Instead he wasted his career by the type of bullying a 14y old would consider hilarious.
What's he's doing now instead? Not even any other sports, what a complete waste. Imagine being able to receive tens of thousands of dollars just by being tall and throwing it away for petty behavior.
>>258473 "Rare strength". It was something his master Naruto (former Takanosato) had on a scroll given to him by a Zen Buddhist priest when he became Yokozuna.
>>258496 Whats up with mongs and their atrocious acne problems. His face looks like it was blasted with birdshot about 50 times and Horseryu's legs are even uglier
>>258520 They should've showcased the power of sumo by having a few Sadogatake guys pick his car up. Google says the cars are a minimum 798kg. Their four sekitori should be able to deadlift that together.
Sumo broadcasting legend Kunihiro Sugiyama says KiriSHITma shouldn't have been promoted to ozeki because his 12-3 result didn't merit it regardless it having been a yusho https://dot.asahi.com/articles/-/279221 Amongst other things he criticizes KiriSHITma for being unable to beat Dan even though everyone else has already figured him out
>>258403 The Onosaato vs Zak practice matches in the first part of that video are some excellent entertainment, I didn't bother with the "watch fatties guzzle japslop" portion because I'm not a retarded faggot
>>258533 You really are a disingenuous piece of shit and I'm so fucking glad you keep your biases on your sleeve contained to a niche group of people who are aware of your bullshit.
>>258529 They really should start using ō and ū, or just write it Oonosato and Hourseshouryuu, etc. >>258534 >I didn't bother with the "watch fatties guzzle japslop" you're a retarded faggot
>>258568 >Hosh >Harry Potter and Bleach >BLEACH What dogshit taste. I hate him more now. >Atamifuji >Eyeshield 21 Fuckin BASED. I love him more now. >Kinbozan >Fast & Furious series >Shishi >Marvel This...this actually makes sense given their fighting styles.
>>258586 Nothing would make them gain as much hinkaku as that. Meanwhile someone's admitting he's into Harry Potter and Bleach roru. >>258604 >Nabachad probably watches that good shit He just gained a massive amount of hinkaku if that's the case.
>>258625 Unc so washed, jealous of Futagoyama and desperate for views he has to punch down, make shit up and gossip like a woman to get any views, baka my head.