>>34301845
>How do I not kms when I fuck this up? Nothing will ever compare to her.
Kek i basically have this delusion too from even less interaction and intimacy with a girl. I basically believe that she's the best because i getting oxitocin from her.

>>34301845
I will count the flags for you bro. Green flag = good. Red flag = bad. Grey flag = irrelevant/neither

>Absolutely stunning blonde with blue eyes
Grey flag
>She's an engineer
Grey flag
>She's sooo smart
Green flag
>She's so funny my cheeks hurt from laughing
Green flag
>Humble
Green flag
>Down to earth
Green flag
>Wears very little make up
Huge green flag
>Doesn't smoke
Green flag
>Hasn't ever done any drugs
Green flag
>Never travelled out of the country
Grey flag
>Regional dialect
Grey flag
>She laughs at my jokes too, very talkative
Green flag
>Wants to take things slow
MASSIVE Green flag.
>A bit younger than me
Grey flag.
She has scored 5 grey flags and a 9 green flags. And zero red flags.
Yep, she's a keeper from what you are saying.

>How do I not kms when I fuck this up?
You are not going to fuck this up. It is not your responsibility to make other people feel feelings, if she bounces it's because she didn't feel things. It's not your fault. If she stays and loves you and happy ending, it's not your glory either, she chose you out of her will.

Forget all about fucking things up it or scoring her in a grandiose impressive fashion. Let go of worrying about winning her or losing her, because that is just a distraction, a mental meme that only adds unnecessary pressure and prevents you from truly enjoying the opportunity.

You will not fuck this up because you cannot, even if you tried. Whatever happens out of it will happen. So whatever happens in the here and now while she's still mingling with you, take it slow and enjoy the small pleasantries, simply for the fact that you can. Be at ease, and understand you have it in you to always find love, even if this goes the way you want or doesn't. You will be OK no matter what bro.

So sit back and enjoy the ride. If that ride crashes and hurts its a story to tell for the future. If she gets in your life, and she stays, good now you make stories with her. Either way have fun

>>34301847
But she really is the best this time... Makes me want to build a family and have a bunch of children, something I strongly rejected before.

wait till you actually get to know her and she ruins herself for you

honestly it's so over. You are going to put this chic on such a pedestal because she's hot. You barely know anything about her. Nothing real comes out during this period. Like is she really THAT funny or do you find her funny because she's hot and you want to fuck her? Imagine everything she says coming out of an ugly fat chicks mouth and consider how you would respond. Before you have a mental breakdown chill the fuck out and get to know her. Don't fall head over heels then be heartbroken over a girl you don't even know

>>34301858
>Makes me want to build a family and have a bunch of children, something I strongly rejected before.
I feel the same way about the one that's giving me attention too.

>>34301857
Thank you, Anon. That actually seems like excellent advice. Very stoic. You have to let go and let life take its course I suppose.

>>34301862
This would actually be fine, wouldn't be as painful, but I highly doubt that it will happen at the moment.

>>34301864
Thanks for the level-headed advice, I do feel intoxicated around her, but actually I do think she is THAT funny as well.

>>34301894
>Thank you, Anon. That actually seems like excellent advice. Very stoic. You have to let go and let life take its course I suppose.

Yep. And it will still feel like hell even when you accept this. You and I could talk stoicism all day and night but when you get on another date with her and you are sat across the table from her and you are counting every change in her facial features in real time, weighing up every silent second, you will panic and feel worry that you're boring or weird or dry or awkward or that you will fuck it all up.

Don't expect to lose those worries and fears, they are not signs of failure or impending failure. Let those feelings happen and let them course through you. It's absolutely fine to be afraid. Courage is what happens when a man chooses to be afraid yet dares to try anyway while feeling afraid at the same time. You are already anxious and fearful yet look at that you took her in a date and had a bit of fun anyway. You are already courageous. You know this, right? That's why I tell you that you have it in you to thrive whether you and her make something more together to not. You have value too, that is why she dared to date you. She saw things in you that she finds valuable. You may not see them, but outsiders can. So trust they can and dare to believe in (you).

> wears very little make up
> has never travelled out of country
> hasn't ever done any drugs
> she's a bit younger than me
as a girl, im telling you, the way you think about these 3 specific points are honestly bullshit and may be potential BIG redflags for her
she may not mind or even like it, but i wouldnt risk telling her ts just in case nigga

instead, make sure to emphasize these
> she's so funny my cheeks hurt from laughing all evening
> she has a cute regional dialect in my native language
> when she smiles, she has the cutest little quiver of her bottom lip
which may not actually be important towards the relationship, but itll make her feel seen since theyre pretty much stuff you like about her as a person or tiny cute things youve noticed that will make her feel seen and appreciated

gl and try not to run your mouth too much about this kind of ideology on women lol

>>34301932
Shut up, bitch

>>34301932
Not OP but as a man with experience with women, you're correct about those cautions. Women can easily take those compliments about drugs travel, makeup etc the wrong way. Women are self conscious to the point it's comical lol. But OP could just spin it in ways that make her feel seen using humor. That's how I handled sore topics with women, I would self deprecate humorously and show her it's okay to laugh at yourself and then they'd feel safe and no topic becomes taboo at that point. Also you can make a woman see those things as strengths. Just need to tell her she is based as fuck to her face, give her ego a nice big pat and make her feel like she stands above all other women in comparison.

>>34301845
>no hilarious twist
what the hell

instead of thinking about fucking things up, think about the ways you're going to impress her

>>34301931
> You know this, right?

Thanks for that, hell yeah. I've had relationships, but dating is very new to me and it really can be stressful and scary. But everything was so natural with her. I felt like I can really be myself.

> You have value too, that is why she dared to date you. She saw things in you that she finds valuable.

Thank you, much love.

>>34301932
I don't think she's like that, but maybe you're right, I'll try to be cautious around this for now.

>>34301845
what makes her different from the people you’ve dated before?

>>34301960
cry me a river faggot

>>34301964
totally get that, but based on what OP is saying, he doesnt seem to have much experience with women, so I simply wouldnt risk it desu
in case he wants to be open, theyre the sort of things that can be mentioned later on in the relationship and seen as cute or quirky, even if she doesnt agree, but for starts id just play it relatively safe in his case lolol

>>34302003
>in case he wants to be open, theyre the sort of things that can be mentioned later on in the relationship and seen as cute or quirky, even if she doesnt agree, but for starts id just play it relatively safe in his case lolol

Good advice, can't argue with that logic. Now onto the real question: Why are women afraid of creepy crawlies and spiders and bugs and get a surprised Pikachu face when they find one in the bathroom and demand me to take care of it? Yet in that same bathroom she will apply make-up to her face, which contains carmine (crushed cochineal beetle) and shellac? (Literal bug poop) That's found in her lipstick or glossy binder or shine? Shits a mystery that keeps me awake at night

>>34301845
https://therationalmale.com/2011/08/30/there-is-no-one/

https://therationalmale.com/2012/01/23/plate-theory-vi-abundance-scarcity/

https://heartiste.org/2010/09/21/curing-oneitis/

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/dvm493/men_what_happened_to_your_old_oneitis/

OP, instead of trying to prove YOURSELF to her, you should keep testing if she actually is the idol you made up in your head.

>>34301992
She seems to have a drive in life to succeed. She is passionate about her field of expertise. It seems like she's so innocent, because she really devoted herself to learning, but I don't know this for a fact yet. Previously I was really guiding my girlfriends in terms of career and self-development.

Looking back at it, they never had any want to improve anything about themselves except for their looks. I was just dragging them along uphill with me.

And she doesn't do drugs. It's not like I'm strictly against drugs anyway, but some people really lack self-control and take it too far.

>>34302023
>Keep testing is she is actually the idol you made up in your head
Are you suggesting OP shit-test a grown woman as if he were a schoolgirl?

>>34301845
>Bros, I found the last good girl on Earth.
>We had one date
Not doubting you, anon, but a single date is way too early to truly know anything about someone. Many women can easily hide their flaws for a couple/several dates.

>>34302028
No, what I mean by 'test' is 'test your hypothesis and ditch or confirm your theory'. Try to read the whole sentence next time.

>>34302032
You don't know her like I do, she wouldn't lie.

>>34302023
>link-dump just like the religious nuts do
rofl
>telling someone NOT to enjoy being in love
that's just sad, being in love is great

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>>34302043
>in love
>first date

>>34302019
because makeup isnt alive and doesnt move or crawl on the bathroom tiles nigga

disgust/fear of bugs isnt based on what the bugs are made of, not even on thinking theyre gonna hurt her
its an instinctual reaction that many human beings in general get when seeing a life form that strives so far from our usual concept of biology
the fact that theyre small contributes to us not being able to differentiate many features clearly, which pretty much only contributes to this

also, shellac isnt bug shit, its a secretion of resin
a secretion isnt always shit

>>34302043
NTA but I get where the anon is coming from. It's that whole lemonerence thing people talk about on TikTak And Quota, Love missiles getting launched early on in the dating phase by Benignant Egoists who put the woman on these speaker corners and fantasize about them being 'The One' from the matrix or something.

And if it turns out her farts don't smell like cinnamon, the evil beneficial love bombardier egotist man will get all angry until he shits his bed or something.

So what you gotta do as a man is pretend to be shadow the hedgehog and fold your arms when talking to a pretty lady and say "Hmph. I'm indifferent."

>>34302039
>You don't know her like I do, she wouldn't lie.
You don't know her like you think you do after a single date.

>>34302092
Now you know why men fear women, you wear the body parts of your enemies on your face like warpaint.

>the fact that theyre small contributes to us not being able to differentiate many features clearly, which pretty much only contributes to this
And notice how women strive to be small and petite and you women wonder why you make us all scared when we take you out to McDonald's for a date. You are wearing the skin of spiders on your face as a form of psychotic triumph while imitating the small factor to become spiders. That's why we named the black widow spider after a female disposition

>>34302099
No, yeah. You're right.

Just sounds like a bland le autist quirky
You'll get over it
And if you don't she'll get over you once she realises she's hotter and can get better ez

>>34302116
Don't listen to the naysayers mate. You are being presumed to be a retard who cannot understand that other people have flaws when you most likely already understand this and don't need to be told like a child. You're simply excited because you had a nice time with a nice catch and you should remain excited as long as the feeling naturally lasts bro. You're just someone who is honest about that excitement and people love to misinterpret other people's honesty for some weird ass reason lol
Don't try to change that excitable and emotional sensitivity you got bro, because it's thanks to that energy you got that you landed and pulled the date off.

And let's be realistic: If the girl were to learn that her existence made a man excited that he had to run and scream to the mountains about it, she'd feel like $1,000,000. So would any man if a woman were to post about him after a date if she were to confess she is absolutely bowled over by him and thinks he is the manliest and most strapping and strong man she ever laid eyes on. If a man learned the woman said this about him behind his back, he'd feel like King of the fucking Universe lmao.

Everyone has an ego and everyone loves getting their ego scratched. But we live in a low trust society now and we don't trust each other with egos because apparently it's a dirty bad thing now or something to dare to feel good about yourself.

>>34302113
nigga youre in psychosis
i DO understand why men may fear women and never said anything about it
humans fear stuff they cant understand or properly interact with, thats literally it

your metaphor is dogshit cause you either dont understand what ive explained about humans´ subconscious fear of bugs or you try to stretch it to a point where its just
not the same
you cant go all poetic and spit faggotry about women being petite because humans are thousands of times bigger than a bug meanwhile, youre at best 10cm taller than the last bitch you spoke to

the features distinction is directly correlated to the size comparison too, and that goes without mentioning how male and female humans quite literally belong to the same species and are essentially the same at a feature level (excluding primary/secondary sex characteristics)

>>34302130
It's not either/or. You're telling OP to throw caution to the wind.

>>34302132
Femanon, your autism is showing. I was only joking for the sake of a fun spirited shit post. Did you honestly think that I genuinely believe women want to be spiders?

>>34302130
> You're simply excited because you had a nice time with a nice catch

For real! You're exactly right about that. I'm usually really level-headed, but I love embracing the emotion and the craziness.
Pleasant feelings are rare enough in life, I don't want to talk myself out of them when they do happen.

>>34302136
>You're telling OP to throw caution to the wind.
Absolutely, I am. Because he is a full-blooded man. I am a husband and father myself and I am telling him man-to-man to throw caution to the wind. Because as a man that's exactly what he should do, because caution in love and romance only leads to self-sabotage. Think for two seconds. Caution is meant to be worn to protect yourself from danger, from enemies or from disease or from something deadly.

Why the fuck should a man be cautious around a woman? It's a woman. What is she gonna do, spontaneously grow six arms and latch around him and bite his head off and devour him whole? If it turns out to be a crazy chick pretending to be a saint, yeah so what, that stings and is messy but OP should trust himself that if the worst case scenario occurs it won't kill him. Caution has a time and a place. He is an adult man, he can handle himself

>>34302138
if you think that shits not something that the average 4chin user could spew, then youre underestimating your fellow anons darling lmao

>>34302144
>He is an adult man, he can handle himself
then he wouldnt be making a 4chan thread about it

>>34302146
>if you think that shits not something that the average 4chin user could spew, then youre underestimating your fellow anons darling lmao
Oh yeah I forget where I was for a second. Why are you here though? Do you enjoy being around a demographic of young men who are tsundere for you and pretend to dislike your species while simultaneously desiring them?

>>34302150
>then he wouldnt be making a 4chan thread about it
Nah. Because by taking initiative and seeking insights somewhere he is handling it himself. He made the thread, he shared the experience and he asked the questions, that's handling himself by definition because it shows humility and resourcefulness.

Honestly why is the world full of such fucking downers these days

>>34301862
>>34301864
This, I can get maybe being a year in and he feels all this, but it sounds like the retard just met this chick and thinks all this surface level shit is what makes up her core person. Wait till you have your first disagreement, or when there's miscommunication. Hell wait till both of you get sexually/socially bored of each other because no couple that's long standing is on some lovey dovey everyday shit.

>>34302153
why wouldnt i be here? i stumbled upon the page sometime early in my teens and never left, i only reveal im a chick in the posts where my input as a girl may be relevant, otherwise i do exactly the same as you or any other

whether im desired or not is pretty irrelevant, and in any case it isnt directed towards me as a person lmao
the only reason you know im a woman is because i considered mentioning it was relevant for my contribution for OP

tsunderes are cute tho, i wish men were real :3

>>34302172
Because you framed the average 4channer as something schizo and incel like, yknow the type who get angry at women for not giving them their titties like a baby who cries for mommy milk. It seems masochistic to voluntarily browse a community you think is full of cases like that.
It's like if I as a man were to deliberately join a femcel group or man hating bulldyke feminist forum just to expose myself to vitriol for no reason. Would be pretty silly to do that, no?

>Tsunderes are cute
Then date this guy rn:
>>34301960

He was so tsundere his name is Sasuke the Hedgehog and yet you haven't asked for his number. Why?

>>34302178
i do think thats the average (or a very big %) of the 4chin users, yeah, but its not masochistic cause i honestly dont give a living shit about what a rando says about me
i understand your point and where your doubt comes from, but youre assuming im affected by these types of behaviors/comments

on the other hand....

OMG!!! Sasuke the Hedgedog? >.<
ill date him right now and be a pure, pristine tradwife for him, its my place as a lowly foid after all >///<

>>34302141
>For real! You're exactly right about that. I'm usually really level-headed, but I love embracing the emotion and the craziness.
Good on you mate, enjoy each minute of it.

>Pleasant feelings are rare enough in life, I don't want to talk myself out of them when they do happen.
Amen. That's a life lesson I didn't learn until way later in my life bro. The only time a human should put all the walls up around themselves is when they are in a coffin. There's unfortunately many people who do that long before their death, they live as though they were dead on the inside. Many such cases

>>34302192
>ill date him right now and be a pure, pristine tradwife for him, its my place as a lowly foid after all >///<

Yeah Sasuke the Hedgehog and also he has a black-steel katana and has the ability to shapeshift into a blood dragon during blood moons and he also has many pained memories and feelings in his black heart but he covers all his emotional scars under a veil of blue tsundere fire and anger and says "Hmph" a lot while ruminating angrily to himself underneath sakura cherry blossom trees

..at night, that parts important too.
But then just when you think he hates your guts he runs in front of 1,000 arrows to shield you from harm because he deep down likes your smile but if you ask him about it he says "It's not like I would kill an army of men to hold your hand or anything, i-idiot!"
Now on a scale from 1 - 10 how gigglesquee nommable would such a man be?

>>34301845
>How do I not kms when I fuck this up?

By making yourself aware that you're currently a bit delusional due to hormones, quite similar to a woman during the worst of her period. You basically don't know this woman, you have no idea who she actually is.
Its a nice feeling to enjoy, but don't believe it. If it does end up not working out, enjoy the bittersweet feeling and turn towards the next woman.

>>34301932
How is liking that she's not a junkie a red flag?

>>34302437
By outing yourself as some shut in freak who thinks everyone who so much as smokes a joint is a full blown junkie

>>34302493
Okay, let me rephrase for the sake of people who are so disingenuous they'll assume the least charitable interpretation of anyone else:
How is it a red flag to see, as anon said, a lack of drug use as a positive?

Don't read anything into that. Literally just explain the reasoning of you immediately thinking
>shut in freak
if a guy says what OP did, verbatim.
> hasn't ever done any drugs

I'd argue that this kind of reflexive, hyperjudgmental condemnation of anyone you disagree with screams "shut in freak" far more than holding any particular opinion could.

>>34302550
Depends on the interpretation and context of course. But it may well mean OP is looking for a woman who is inexperienced in life (as at least trying some kind of drug is part of growing up for many people). Basically anything that points towards him looking for acuckservative "tradwife", aka a shut in semi retard who has no idea of the larger world. Which is a red flag to most women, since wanting to be a "trad wife" is generally only interesting to used up gold diggers looking to settle down, not young women who have yet to live life.

>>34302586
Thank you for explaining, but I'm still in disbelief how this is the conclusion anyone would come to when OP says he thinks no drug use is a positive. Absolute clown world where that kind of statement makes people fume.

>as at least trying some kind of drug is part of growing up for many people
Leaving aside how crazy this is on its own, why is it so hard to take it at face value instead of treating it as some kind of esoteric hint that he actually wants to find a clueless woman to "trap and abuse" because her never having tried drugs somehow means she won't know any better? I sincerely hope this isn't what people outside of tiktok would actually start thinking.

CHILL.

Don't do shit like think you are the one or the worst. She deals with guys like you like how you take a dump.

Trust me, the moment you are chill about everything everything sets into place naturally.

>>34302708
probably cause, seeing the other points OP finds positive, thats partially the reason...? not in a literal way, he probably doesnt even think that way consciously

its not specifically the fact he likes that she hasnt tried drugs, its the fact its combined with a quite a bunch of other "conservative" shit

>treating it as some kind of esoteric hint
its not, its literally a logical correlation man, even if its an assumption, you cant blame someone for being cautious

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>>34301845
Keep this in mind though