our pens :)

>>153705872
more like the jests (because they're a joke) lol

First for beef jerky :)

>>153705872
disability welfare pays 700$ actually

It would've been better if Reilly Smith died rather than Johnny hockey

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>>153705872
>>153705872
>>153705872
>>153705872

>>153705879
Our Penguins =)

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Wonder how their relationship is today.

>>153705888
Why don't Finnish men have body hair?

>>153705888
kek classic
>>153705902
looking good! not only this season but the future too, amazing how fast they turned the tide. couple season ago everything seem hopeless

>>153705911
part Nephilim

might play vidya at work

Really hope our penguins make the playoffs (:

>>153705938
I used to study during work

>>153705872
jet's edition? how about. Hellebuyck to ANY US team (preferably Red Wings, or maybe even Devils)

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kwab

>>153705960
They tried to dump that turd on the leafs

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Nordfrens unite!

>>153705958
I hope for that outcome. He needs a stanley cup

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wtf did he mean by this

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>>153705982
lewd

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we did it boys

Adin hill has to be the worst starter in the league rn

>>153705988
>its real

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>>153706009
hey, it's a Misawa 16 =D
>i loved working in PACAF, but I hate F-16s
loud, shitty animals, and only one engine
>lawndart

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Gary makes teams have 23 different uniforms each year, but then still can't avoid this once a season jersey matchup.

>>153706031
>every hockey twat watching Heated Rivalry right now: "now kiss -_-"

>>153706033
_/ _/ _/ _/ _/

does bedard get passed around the locker room every time the hawks win?

https://www.reddit.com/r/Jets/

>"passed"
>implying Bedard doesn't insist

>>153706053
he's popular in the showers

>tonight's powerplay sponsored by ozempic. mcdavid brought to you by canadian tire shoots the puck sponsored by tim hortons! hits the crossbar brought to you by burger king, have it your way.

>>153705988
what the fuck am I reading?

>>153705988
>>153706087
its a clever play on the fact that going as far back as roswell saucers have been used in misinformation campaigns. the olympics were a sham. mcdavid cries because he has to keep losing or they will unplug him

>>153706128
We lost. Move on, faggot.

>>153705960
The cap hit is the biggest issue here but I think a lot of teams would benefit from having him in their bottom six.

>>153706048
based

tage thompson has kids which means he has had sex multiple times

>>153706144
me move on? im trying to get you up to speed. were not done losing yet.

For the first time since 2019 Stars have gotten 80 points in 60 games or less games :D

>>153706031
tage looks like rem lazar

>>153706156
he's my age and is married, has kids, and owns a house. I have none of those ༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽

>>153706156
What if the kids are twins?

>knigits

how long until these retards get cassidy fired

>>153706156
@grok is this true

>>153706197
you still have to have sex twice because it's two different people

>>153706205
they're already asking debrusk for tips

>>153706205
It'll be the end of this season if things don't turn out right

Have you bros watched the Shia Labeof interview yet? I recommend it it’s quite the ride. He’d be a great NHL commissioner.

>>153706208
What if one or some of the children are the result of a grave act of infidelity?

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The fujoshits have gone insane they're crafting gay family trees now...

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>>153706220
>Gary Bettman will have your tongue for this outrage, you willful scamp

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>>153706196
Try not to be upset, but happy for that person.
You have things too. Gary's watching.

Han e fin

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>LAFFS

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>>153706239

>>153706262
Our penguins with 86% chance to make the playoffs (:

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Should have fired Hiller in the locker room in Edmonton after game 4

>>153706262
Another year
Another disgustingly inflated odds for Carolina

Very cute girl

>>153706262
I was told both the Leafs and Jets were supposed to have won cups by now

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Just watched the video of the Stone “injury” and it’s just crazy how I can never tell if he’s faking or truly just that fragile

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>listening to and then believing in lies like a Fool
can't blame someone for playing their part, I suppose

>>153706310
>I was born with glass bones and paper skin
>every practice I break my legs
>every game I break my arms

start the bus

>>153706262
>9.7% chance for Florida
>88.4% chance for Buffalo
I'm finna boutta bust

Pretty tough for a goaler to save a snap shot from the top of the faceoff circle, no chance at all

SCAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR

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>Worcester Railers are looking for a new identity

>>153706310
It was even more ridiculous than that gif

>>153706362
where are the ads? i only like jerseys with ads

At least this years post season will be more of a shakeup compared to the last two years.

>>153706346
Go Sabres

>>153706310
The irony of Stoner's name is that he gets injured off the weirdest shit. Like one time against Edmonton when Stone went for an Empty Net goal McNigger slashed him and while it didn't look like anything, Stone was gone for 3 weeks.

>>153706239
>now
this is a classic funpost
anyway at least half of this is common knowledge even here

>scoreless draw in Providence

>>153706262
>>153706407
There are no percentages. One team wins and the universe has already decided. Everything unfolds as it should

Kek vegas getting wrecked by a sid-less pittsburg

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Is Sid are going be back for the 'offs? Do need even him pengs bros?

>>153706310
Also fuck Harley for that check to where Stone got his spleen surgery, glad that faggot traitor won nothing in the Olympics.

>>153706422
cope our captain is also hurt bro

>>153706407
I just don’t see Colorado advancing past the 2nd round.

>>153706427
Where did that penguin get all that red paint?

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>THIS GUY is a Gold Medalist

A friendly reminder

>Shut out by Silvos

our pens :)

>>153706504
Can he play right wing?

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>lose to rags
>beat vegas 5-0

Brook Naders tits in my mouth

>>153706535
He can do anything with his wings, he's a free bird.

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>>153706548

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>>153706504
Can't believe they booed him in Toronto. He used to be their metrosexual king.

>>153706504
Man if our current cap situation didn’t suck balls he’d be a great replacement for Seguin right about now. Oh well. hope he makes it to an American team regardless.

>>153706573
lose just a tiny bit of hairline, and look at what happens

>>153706257
Thanks Gary. I hope I passed my exam this time

>>153706581
He's gonna be Detroit's answer for when Patty Kane decides to hang up his skates

>>153706421
Retard

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gn /hoc/, have a good one :) cya next time

>>153706504
Bro's head is built like a 1x1 lego piece.

>>153706463
Same, they go back to their pre 2022 standards

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>>153706620
Hyvaa Yota Pekka :)
Another exciting week awaits us

>>153706605
Oooh Detroit would be a good fit I think.

>>153706239
MacKinnon is a dirty slut >:(

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>>153706681

>>153706694
KARMA POLICE
ARREST THIS MAN

Will the ducks win tonight?

>>153706694
I wonder where that poor plushie ended up

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>>153706694

>>153706748
kek

>>153706463
>>153706633
Apparently no team has ever won a cup when their PP fell outside the top ten.

>>153706745
He mutilated it then threw it in the trash

We will add Kadri and Faulk and the Cup is ours. Cap this.

>>153706775
Maybe he can start enjoying life now since it doesn't matter either way

>>153706803
Not if Dallas gets Kadri and Ristolainen first

>>153706808
He’s planning on beginning to eat carbs

Penguins have a significantly better shot of making playoffs right now compared to the Oilers. Apologize to Stuart Skinner

>>153706772
Who told you that

>>153706912
A random person on the internet

>>153706772
Erm stat fags

>>153706903
I want oilers to miss playoffs so bad

>scoreless in Woo-stah, Mass

>>153706946
Same it would be so funny.

>>153706949
Bud scored on your five hole that April

>>153706946
Oilers and the Panthers

>>153706978
gross

Most performances of at least 5 goals allowed among all teams so far this season in the NHL:
21- Maple Leafs
20- Canucks
18- Blues
18- Ducks
16- #Oilers (Thanks to their 5-4 defeat earlier on today against the Sharks)
15- Predators
15- Panthers
15- Flyers
13- Sharks
13- Capitals

Brandon bussi five hole scouting report

I can only speak for the past 59 games but Gulutzan has done a pretty good job.

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need our sharks to score on the pp now :)

>>153707140
I have a female cousin so looks so much like him.

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Vancouver bros, Messier just scored against us...

is onhockey kill for anyone else?

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>the hongcover ducks

>>153707161
stream east isn't working?

>>153707151
gross

>>153707012
Unbelievably based

>>153707151
The bulldyke community loves hockey

>>153706946
Man
I sometimes lay in bed thinking about the skinner trade. I dont even like the oilers but man...
The fans must be fucking pissed.
Spending an extra 2 million for a worse goaltender whos also on a longer contract AND is older...

>scoreless draw in Utah

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>>153707012
>misses the playoffs
>draft Mckenna
>win 6 more cups

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cute!

>>153707379
gay

Just send Sherwood somewhere on Friday and try to recoup your losses. He obviously doesn't want to be here and doesn't jell with anyone. Who gives a shit if he's only played two games, this was the risk you were willing to take knowing he was injured and the league was going on break.

>scoreless second intermissions in small town America

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Our Sennies :)

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?????

>>153707457
McDavid is being traded to the leafs!!!!!!
LETS GOOOOOOOOO

so, who are you lifelong for in pwhl?

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>>153707379
based

>>153707493
The fuck is bipoc and aapi?

>>153707470
Why would he go to a worse team?

>>153707511
australian association of psychologists (inc), famously hockey stans

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>these athletes are displaying their capabilities in handling, feeling, and SEEING the puck

Be The Puck, /hoc/
>we are one with the puck, and the puck is one with /hoc/

Was last night’s snl funny?

>>153707571
>Caring about snl in 2026
How old are you?

>>153707571
last nights nhl was funny

snl used to be a big thing when i was a lad
i never hear anyone talking about it nowadays

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GARY BETTMAN

NEEDS MORE

COW BELL

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>>153707379
Ice sports are NOT for everyone

lets go mammies!

>>153707576
The Hughes brothers and the guy from heated rivalry were on

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What did he mean by that?

>>153707588
A lot of that is just cultural atomisation. TV, particularly network, has plummeted in shared viewership for decades.

>>153707630
I've always talked about it as if it were TV apartheid

>>153707630
that's very true. i remember everyone watched survivor and who wants to be a millionaire on ctv. kids these days will never know

>>153706046
Seriously I’m just now really returning to the NHL after a while (thanks to team USA’s domination of Canada and the Olympics for drawing attention to it) but WTF do they have so many jerseys for I definitely appreciate retro sweaters but I mean this is kind of ridiculous what I’ve seen in one week alone

>>153707622
He's putting to bed rumors that he's secretly mcdavid obviously.

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>back in the days of Chapelle Show and South Park

>Jets themed /hoc/ thread
>Nobody is talking about the game
Lol?

>>153707687
i dont feel so good so many dumb penalties against our sharkies

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>>153707687

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who here /comfy/?
i just grabbed a blanket to sit under

>>153707705
comfy is just a code word for boring desu

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>raise your mug lads Gary puck is upon us

>>153707687
there's not much to say if hellebuyck decides to show up

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>>153707705
>>153707705
I can see the puck, and it's beautiful
>enjoy your blankie, Finlad

>scorefull draw in Callgary

>>153707716
Kys

>Kuopion Yliopistollinen Sairaala

Incredible night of games ahead

any webm of mark stones bucci being completely shattered after being lightly touched?

>scoreless draw in St Paul

Do you believe in bud after 1?
Trb can feel something inside him say
"I really don't think you're raped enough, no"

>sexless men in /hoc/

>>153707808
gross, and also it's off meter
so there's two things you're bad at, Budley

>muh mammies

>scoreless draw

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Well?

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>>153707896
Just proud to finally be a part of the postseason again
>enjoy your Stan Lee, Tampa Bay, see you next year

yay soccertalk on the sharks intermission finally a european friendly franchise

>>153707896
when does jack jewish play?

Jesus I just want to watch Hellebuyck but wow do the sharks and jets suck. just fiddling around with the puck not doing anything. what an abysmal bore of a game. holy crow

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>>
>yay soccertalk
gross and gay

>>153707996
he played yesterday and then went to star on SNL. he has the night off tonight

>>153707998
sharks are probably tired after chasing mcdavid around yesterday.

based owen nolan. i heard his family was affiliated with the provisional ira which is why they fled to north america. what a story that guy has

my sharkies :)

>>153707622
just goes to show Canadians only superior American players can score on Hellebuyck (he just scored for San Jose)

>most dangerous draw and the most interesting thing to happen in San Jose today

>>153707896
My penguins (:

>>153707896
My starsies once again have the hardest path to the final. Damn you Gary!!

>>153707457
Why is he holding out an empty hand

Jets have an evil vibe

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>>153708196
>see the Puck

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>>153708203
Is it because of their proximity to the weapons industry?

another day full of shit games, at least we have baseball preseason

>refs cheating again

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>>153707896

It would be very funny and cool if the Mings managed to win tonight

>>153708319
Absolutely not. Soulless

>>153707896
funny how a couple years ago almost all the canadian teams were in and now they've been destroyed by awful GMs

another night in /hoc/. good evening lads.

anyone have any good GIFs of fans being hit in the face with flying pucks

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>>153708420

>>153708420
hopefully the games improve because so far its garbage. im hoping Calgary v Anaheim is worth watching. very boring lame ass game with jets v sharks. Just wanted to see Hellebuyck own them but both teams are just playing fiddly-fuck wit the puck

>>153708445
seconded

klingberg is so ass

>>153708420
good evening, pekka

>>153708538
high kickin', low scorin', and ties...?

Ayy a shutout for Soderblom

M I S A
I
S
A

are our sharkies going to the playoffs

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>>153708433
Best I can do

Who's idea was it to make thread the Jets edition?

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>>153708420

Wow maybe if Team Canada had Mike Misa they could have won..woulda coulda shoulda but holy crow what a boring game that was except for the first 2 minutes and the last 2 minutes. YIKES

>>153708606
oh thats no fun. but as long as he has one eye thats good. I just wanted to see gifs of people getting walloped in the head by pucks by total surprise in the stands

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>>153708433

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>>153708630
>>153708613

>>153708642
I can’t see the puck

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>invisible puck is an oxymoron

>ESPN audio died
kek

Misa has been looking better and better every game.
Trying to split the d in 3v3 OT isn't what I could consider the smartest of decisions but the hand eye coordination for that shot was good.

JLMI

BIG SAVE DA-ACK

the metro is so shit

>>153708728
surprised patty wah didn't pull him after that
keenan would've

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>what the fuck did I just watch

I saw the puck once.
A was a goodly puck.
We shall not see its like again

there are 3 canadian teams in the pacific, 1 in the central, 3 in the atlantic and 0 in the metro

what if we instead had 2-2-2-1? that would make it more likely that a canadian team goes to the playoffs

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>>153708752

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WELL WELL WELL

looks like /hoc/ owes my sharkies another apology

OUR San Jose Sharkies :)

what game are we watching now lads

I caught a shark fishing from the beach once

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>>153708836

>>153708778
What reason is there to apologize? /hoc/ has been dick riding shorks for a minute.

wtf why is there a game on at 2 in the afternoon tomorrow?

>>153708778
they're swimming into playoffs

>>153705872
>jeets edition
sweet so this is cric

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sheer domination

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>>153708892
St David's Day Eve match

Tkachuk just said this game is like watching paint dry. Goddamn the islanders blow

>>153708937
And yet the Panthers still look like they're struggling.

>DJ Smith on whether the team had recovered mentally from blowing a 2-0 series lead last spring and getting eliminated in the first round by Edmonton. >“I’d say no”.

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>>153708836

JLM2

Cats SCAAAAAAR.

Audio cut out?

>>153709009
he's resisting the urge to scream

is patrick roy related to derek roy

>>153709009
This dude thinks he's in The Office.

>>153708933
I see

Why is Tuukka on TNT now?

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>Roy that rhymes with Joy
>not Roy that rhymes with Blah

shitties KEK

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UH OH KITTIES

UH OH

>>153709050
good for him

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jlmi special

>>153709062
need a goalcam, can barely see the rebound off the glass

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>>153709067

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>>153709082
oh it didnt even touch the board

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>>153709062
EEK A RAT

>goal cams on the crossbar of the net

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>>153707571
It was good natured and fun, but neither the Hughes brothers or Hilary, or the other chick did any sketches. They were just at the beginning and the end.

The homo guy was extremely flaming as expected. There was a goofy ah sketch about Turkish leg-lengthening surgeries, and a Weekend Update about Punch the Monke.

The band Blumpkin and Sons performed and were wearing the players’ gold medals at the end.

>>153709090
he plays for the team, dummy, put your cladhooper down

>>153709090
JEN

>>153709082
What a crazy bounce

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too much man

>>153709095
sounds lame

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Hi guys. I have a question for you. From seeing this thread, this one talks about ice hockey. According to Wikipedia, there are two hockey variants, ice hockey and regular hockey. Where do you talk about regular hockey on /sp/? What do you think about regular hockey? Have you played any of the regular hockey versions?

>>153709130
We don't talk about regular hockey at all. At least in burgerland, only girls play that. I have no idea, you'd have to create a general for it

>>153709130
Try /xs/

>>153709130
we call it field hockey and only girls play it

>>153709050
The only people complaining about it were deranged pRedditors, some joy-kill feminists and Canadians. Everyone rose even the vast majority of liberals thought it was awesome Team USA men & women won gold. Hughes Bros were cheered everywhere all week even on SNL.

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>>153708778
I apologize

>>153709112
Yeah, it was very lame except for the two minutes of them showing the players, and having some good natured banter back-and-forth.

I try to appreciate SNL even in modern times and they’ve toned down some of the reddit-cringe style writing that was REALLY bad a few years ago, but it’s still pretty sucky compared to the 90’s hey day (almost like NHL hockey)

>>153709144
*everyone else thought it was great they won

Know nothing about this semen slurping "sport" but i hope the panthers lose

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>people still talking about trump like anything he says about ice hockey matters to anyone that matters
next topic, pls

>>153708778
how's your cat doing Shannon

are the Tkachuksters American heroes now?

>>153709229
No

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>>153709229
Everyone on the team is a hero

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>>153709229
Brady is the perfect representative of an average american

>>153709249
who was adopted, him or matthew?

>>153709169
_/ _/ _/ _/ _/ _/
hopefully they have jokes beyond orange man bad