>>34373721
>go learn and build up your social skills by meeting actual women in the real world
>meeting actual women in the real world
how do?

>>34373721
That's not a woman, these threads have never helped me

Girls, how do?

>>34373841
Bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla.

Meet their standards. If you aren't up to snuff, then either change and meet the standards or jerk off.

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>>34373836
just go outside your house anon they'll come up and talk to you.

>>34373836
you just DO okay? stupid incel

>>34373721
will reiterate my point from last thread:
i think this guy is not giving the whole picture:
https://www.fantasticanachronism.com/p/how-to-be-good-at-dating
lots of good info but i think he takes for granted an essential part of the puzzle that even he doesn't realize he is doing. he admits he is autistic, so that makes sense.
>>34373678
this is why i don't want to just bang. i want a wife, i just can't speak to women very well. i have learned a lot but the anxiety cripples me, and the first impression means so much. i know women who have married men because of their first impression.
questions:
have we lost "third spaces"? in the UK, where can i find social places with women to practice? and get over my fears with exposure therapy?

>>34373841
>Girls, how do?
i once made a thread on /soc/ asking femanons, basically, what women really want and who they have actually dated. in 60 replies i got no straight answers, which is how i know it was women responding.
thread got more than 250 replies iirc, i got about 3 actual answers from women, two were just sluts acting on impulse or seeking very specific fetishes, so any man into it was eating from the palm of their hand in a second, and one was a trad wife, met him at church or something like that.
Needless to say, for many other reasons as well, i am converting to Christianity.

>>34371919
>>34371919
It's now the day of our date. Do I reply on hinge again or go about my day unmatch this bitch?

>>34374169
>and get over my fears with exposure therapy?
correct
if you really wanted it you'd dedicate a major portion of your life to the following:
getting as fit and as lean as possible
getting as groomed as possible
doing that in conjunction with
finding a wingman (very important)
the reason being one:
talking to girls requires social muscle
and your muscle is very atrophied probably
a wingman who has similar goals to you (finding a wife)
will allow you both to be social and warm up your social muscles and keep them warm

then you will approach girls at parks, cafes, bars, libraries, malls, art galleries, pubs, events, farmers markets
together

why not alone?
it's definitely doable, but you have to be able to warm up your social muscle with phonecalls to close friends before approaching

Hey frens, met a girl at a dating event yesterday and things went really well. Took her to another bar, kissed multiple times and exchanged numbers. We have a date set for Monday (yeah I would've preferred earlier as well, conflicting work schedules) but how much should I be texting in the meantime?

Messaged her earlier with the details for Monday, she responds confirms, I say I'm excited and she sends 2 heart emojis. I know I'm super overthinking this but I'm turbo-autistic and bad at texting people in general, do I just leave it for a few days and check in? Message actively? About what?

thinking about getting my gf to use a very small prostate stimulating vibrator toy on my ass while giving me a blow job.

>does this make me gay?
>will she think I am gay and lose respect for me or whatever?

I honestly don't have some gay need to get fucked in the ass or whatever. Its just the meme I have always heard about it how it makes you cum harder than anything else got me really curious

No one is getting women anymore
they will approach you themselves if they are interested (they want 7/7/7 chads that only exist in their minds).

If a woman is absolutely unwilling to be vulnerable with you, she does not love you.

>>34374609
>a dating event
where do you find those?

>>34374591
>finding a wingman (very important)
let me guess, i can pay you to be my wingman?
>warm up your social muscle with phonecalls to close friends before approaching
ok that's interesting, i know that sort of thing works, never thought about calling someone though, that's so obvious now.
>if you really wanted it
and fyi i do, i just spent about 6 hours this morning watching/reading dating coach stuff. I read things about it al the time, i feel like i have to learn a whole part of humanity i never did though. i'm going to make a thread for a question i want to ask, you will know which one it is.
please chime in.
i have definitely improved at socializing a lot over the years but finding the confidence to make the first move AND a good impression is difficult.

>>34374959
Are you tuning into the sovereignim x lauren meet tomorrow?
https://x.com/buridansridge/status/2035661280200343919

sovereignim aka illimitablemen writes amazing pieces on social dynamics

Your posts overlap with his territory

It is better to want women for their humanity over wanting them to be perfect.

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>>34372629
I think Girl 1 is about to ask me out. FUCK! I was just planning to chat some more, until I figured out how to close. I didn't expect her to do the closing.

Girl 2, the "9/10", turned out to be a massive butterface. Perfect body, but I was being conservative because there were no clear, unobscured shots of her face. She sent me some pics, and now I see what the "skeleton" is in her closet.

The cost of completely being a freespirit is being frowned upon by others for not following the rigid order of society. When you are a freespirit it pisses everyone off. But what you gotta do is stay compassionate and love yourself through it all even when it is rough. And it will be rough and it isn't easy. So when a hot woman finds out about your doom video game collection, you got to know her hating is not you but the cost of being a free spirit.

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why does everyone seem so disinterested to socialize? everyone is always glued to their phones and whenever you do chat with someone, they seem annoyed or bothered. it makes it difficult to meet girls and people in general. just when i decide to start taking initiative to meet people...

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>>34376101
I ASKED GIRL 1 OUT!! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!

She was beating around the bush, so I had to take the hint and go for the close. I have never been on a single date. I don't even know how to kiss.

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>>34376310
She's agreed to it. I don't know if that means she wants me to make the plan. I don't know how to plan a fucking date. I'm just going to come up with some bullshit about a nature walk and then some food. Jesus Christ. I'm in the fucking deep-end right now.

>>34373721
I hate women so god damn much. how do i find a girl that will let me slap the shit out of her in bed? or do they all like it?

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>>34376354
Just got weird. She wants to go to "her favorite dog shelter". I already told her I'm not a pet person. Even if we do something else, I can't look past her underselling how much she has to be into dogs. She's probably going to try to get one at some point.

This might be over before it even begins.

>>34376354
Read the section of Models about planning dates. TL;Dr you want 3 roughly 1 hour activities, ideally in increasing order of intimacy and with any drinking towards the end, you want it peaking around 10-11pm to optimise getting her home

>>34376436
Thanks anon. I'll use that for future planning. But I'm bailing on this one.

Pet-obsessed women are one of my biggest red flags. I won't even match with them if they have a cat or dog pic. She tried to keep it lowkey when I mentioned it previously, but it's out of the bag now.

>>34376430
>This might be over before it even begins.
many such cases
don't get too beat up about it, this proves something: you can get dates.
take charge, don't put on too much of a facade if you are nervous, try to be chill and fun/funny though. if you don't know how to do things, then you are about to learn, heck, if things go far maybe you could say "i'm not a great kisser, can you teach me?"

>>34376430
>She wants to go to "her favorite dog shelter".
that's not a date. dates aren't dealing with volunteering to help the elderly or helping abused shitbulls or other depressing things. the point is something light and fun

>>34374657
no that's stupid. getting fucked in the ass with dick makes you gay. having your gf play with your boy button has been mainstream for 25 years. every issue of Cosmo had that as a sex tip.

before I get another girlfriend, I want to master girlfriend management.

>>34376553
Thanks for the advice. I had a change of heart shortly after I made that post. She claims she understands I'm not into the pet stuff, but she still wants to go out. Best case scenario, she's telling the truth, and we have a good time. Worst case scenario, she's lying, but I still get some valuable experience out of it. I won't have to say shit like, "I have never dated before" anymore.

>>34376623
Now, we're planning what seems like a nice outing around the town, visiting some scenic nature sports, a historic site, and some food and live music to end the night.

>>34373721
i keep seeing this girl that works at the grocery store stocking shelves and every time we see eachother we make eye contact and smile but nothings ever going to come of it because i dont know what the fuck to say or do and no one here gives me advice

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>>34376751
normalfag advice but make small talk. read picrel if you don't know about small talk. it was a good read for me. but i have no friends and never had a gf so fuck my advice ig
>every time we see eachother we make eye contact and smile
that's a good start

I think this girl I went on a date with that went really well might be fucking dead. She's been gone from everything and hasn't blocked or even unmatched me, just stopped responding and disappeared from all social media activity.

>>34374998
>let me guess, i can pay you to be my wingman?
kek if youre in japan sure
but in your local city just get one of your friends and start teaching them what you learn and go out together

or even make your first few outings gaming guys
guys who seem cool

> to make the first move AND a good impression is difficult
this is exactly the hardest part
and the solution is as i mentioned being really warmed up socially before making a first impression

>>34376845
same thing happened to me four months ago. date went well too. there has to be an explanation for this

>>34376863
Ghosting is one thing, but I had her on enough places that she's either REALLY committed to the bit or something fuckin happened

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>>34376943
for me, i just had her number so im lost. she even said she wanted to go out again sometime at the end. she was great

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>>34376729
I'm actually super-pumped right now. It was a bit scary, but I actually asked a girl out and she said yes. I have the date all planned out now and she is looking forward to it.

Still chatting with the butterface too. She sent me some videos, and it's not nearly as bad as I thought. Solid 8/10.

This is all moving so fast. It's insane.

>>34376845
>>34376943
that's really fucking weird. how long has it been going on for?
can you contact one of her friends or family? it's not unheard of, she might have had her phone stolen or maybe she's in hospital for something serious and is not conscious.
I've had plenty of girls ghost me and it;s so fucking shit, like i see people saying that "they're just doing it for thier own protection" but really? over text? and from who? who do they think i am? i'm so fucking nice to them, it's insulting when they put me in the same box as a violent abuser. WOMEN: JUST TELL US NO it saves you so much trouble, a real violent abuse guy will STALK YOU when you ignore him. and a decent man will be driven to stalking behaviour to find out if you are fucking alive or not.

>>34376729
>Best case scenario, she's telling the truth, and we have a good time. Worst case scenario, she's lying, but I still get some valuable experience out of it. I won't have to say shit like, "I have never dated before" anymore.
that's the spirit

Years and years of being the nice guy... I warn you all, it doesn't amount to anything. You really gotta take the theory into action. I finally understand, once you treat PUA theory as the bible, and understand that women in fact hate you if you're not at least a jerk to them, it all adds up. This little hack changed my results completely. I was getting rejected (and not standard ones either, but ghost and then cut off all contact after I was nice to them), lonely, in a desolate and sad place. But I kept being nice over and over again. It made no sense. Then I came across a YT video where the guy explained this.

I recommend you watch this, it changed my life through the inspiration and growth it inspired, and it may change yours too (though ignore the bit about steroid use - he is an idiot in that case, it's best to stick to supplements like creatine, magnesium and/or nootropics like Semax) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEkbAijYf8I

So I started being subconsciously mean to them, understanding the reasoning behind each decision (E.G. they wouldn't want a soi boy being so nice about it, or they want to be led around, or they are testing me, etc...), and now after years of drought I am back in the game and women are answering my DMs (because I'm deciding what to say and training my "asshole" muscle) I also noticed something about being a jerk, naturally, I have more interesting things to say to them. It's almost as if confidence can only come from that state of mind. The more you maintain it, the more confidence you get. Once you tap into it, you work it like a social muscle, and ensure all your interactions with women are working this muscle, so that after a few weeks or months of prep with them, they naturally fall into your lap. I now understand why some guys get gfs, and for others like myself it seemed impossible.

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>>34377751
>The speaker argues that women are naturally more attracted to “bad boys” than to “nice guys,” claiming this is due to biology and concepts like “pre-selection” (men who appear to have many options seem more attractive). He contrasts this with the common advice men receive growing up—to be kind and respectful—which he says often doesn’t lead to attraction.

>He explains that “bad boy” behavior signals abundance, confidence, and lack of neediness. In contrast, “nice guys” are portrayed as overly accommodating and lacking options, which he claims reduces their attractiveness.

>To adopt a more attractive mindset, he recommends:
>Prioritizing yourself and your goals (being somewhat selfish, especially when lacking confidence or success)
>Building “abundance” in life (confidence, options in dating, career success)
>Maintaining a strong personal purpose that comes before relationships
>Setting boundaries in relationships and not appearing dependent
>Improving physical presence, including fitness, style, and even tattoos
>Learning martial arts to build confidence and a sense of dominance
>Understanding “female nature” and recognizing “tests” from women

>He emphasizes that self-improvement should come first, and helping others comes later once you’ve reached a stronger position in life.

>The speaker also promotes testosterone use as a way to increase confidence, masculinity, and drive, while dismissing common concerns about its risks.

>Overall, the message is that men can increase their attractiveness by becoming more self-focused, confident, and purpose-driven—adopting some traits associated with “bad boys” without necessarily engaging in harmful behavior.

He doesn't mention anything about an asshole muscle. He talks about the opposite of what you're talking about. Nothing about being an asshole, everything about building your own life instead of chasing women. What is wrong with you.

>>34377759
You used AI to analyze the video, so you missed the point of what I said, and the point of the video I linked. The "asshole muscle" is just a certain mode of confidence you tap into, which is the insight I made after applying what I learned from watching the video. Though, you have to apply this muscle skillfully, by analyzing how the girl might react, and whether your application is correct (E.G. she can't do anything about her appearance etc... so don't comment on that).

>>34377775
There was no point missed. I used AI to summarize a direct transcript using youtube 2 transcript. Nothing the AI said about the direct transcription of the video is false. You invented this "asshole muscle", and if that works for you, that's great. Don't misrepresent shit when the only actual thing that guy is saying is "build yourself up first and foremost".

>>34377775
One way I could explain asshole mode, is think of it like this: Make very blunt comments, and do not worry too much about the nature, E.G. sexual, etc... and don't care about the outcome either. Make it clear that you're having fun for yourself and not for her (though in turn she will also be having fun), and do this with multiple women.

>>34377776
If you watch the first 5 mins of the video then you will understand how it relates to everything I said. The whole point of the video is that being a "bad boy" is how you get women to be attracted to you. He describes many "nice guy" behaviors- doing favors for women, putting yourself second, being actually kind and pleasant to them (the opposite of being a jerk), and obviously that implies not taking risks as a result of that niceness (when you ask her out, you're going to be nervous, because you're afraid of the outcome, because you want to be nice to her. Instead, you want to be a jerk and have that abundance mindset). Note I'm not repeating what the video says verbatim, I took lessons away from it, that's the only point of the video. You can use this mentality to conclude that what I said is mostly true, everything he says in that video allows you to see interactions with women differently. What I mean by that, is that this forms the basis of all relationships with women. You can essentially work out this "muscle", or this new set of standards for behaving around them with every interaction, and it becomes fun and fulfilling to do so, because you mostly don't get shit results if you apply it correctly. Obviously, aside from the video I'm sharing my experience as well as drawing some inspiration from other sources, but that's besides the point.

>>34377442
Since late January. If it was just her phone I'd figure she's ignoring me instead of blocking for some reason and shrug it off. Even if I don't really get it, I get that it's normal. But everything going dark at the same time makes me expect worse.

>>34378153
>Since late January.
that is really fucking weird. that is a worrying length of time. reach out to someone. who knows her ... or maybe now, knew her.

>>34378589
Unfortunately I don't really know any of them well enough to have contact info. So I don't have any way to do that besides going to her parents fucking house. I've never met them, only picked her up there, so either she has decided to suddenly go completely off-grid and that wouldn't be particularly welcome, or something did happen and the last thing they need is some random dude coming to their door like "your daughter dead or what?" So I'm just stuck not knowing and hoping she just thought it would be fun to go be amish or something.

>>34378711
>besides going to her parents fucking house
write them a letter, they may even appreciate the concern. no social media? friends numbers or contacts?

>>34378831
No social media besides the dad's LinkedIn page he clearly doesn't use. Hadn't met any of her friends yet. I guess I could try a letter.

>>34377775
it's still crazy to me how "nice guys" think normal masculine traits are "being an asshole". truly a feminized bluepill society we live in.
also the way you phrase it is gay as fuck, asshole muscle, lmao.

>>34378935
also regarding being worried about doing weird stuff like turning up at random, just be polite, honest, and, as an autist myself, i have to prepare a bit, so i'd be thinking what to say or do, different possibilities;
1.if she hasn't died, ask what is going on but graciously accept her weird af declination and just leave.
2.if she has died, offer condolences.
you ARE genuinely concerned, tap into that, be honest about it, and yes, it is weird to visit someone you don't know well so just make that clear
>"hey, sorry to bother you, i know we don't know each other, and this is kinda weird to just turn up like this, but something else kinda weird has happened ... [elaborate on her disappearance & your concern, if she has died: talk a bit, she was a lovely girl etc etc, offer sympathy and support, can you help them in any way? get groceries or help them deal with anything they are struggling with at a time like this?]"
3. you knock on the door and she opens.
a good line might be "thank god you haven't died, but if it you aren't interested i wish you'd make it clear, all ghosting like that did was leave me with questions, (ask them) if she is not interested; well, now i have answers, bye"
4. she is ok and still interested, same as above but arrange a date, exchange new contact info, don't hang about too much.

Worst comes to worst this was a weird chapter in your life, but i must tell you this, from my own similar experiences; Doing nothing in this situation will haunt you forever. That is the worst option.
Remember too, it's not against the law to knock on a door and be polite.

>>34377776
>Nothing the AI said about the direct transcription of the video is false
lmaooooooo

what the fuck is wrong with your generation

just watching a few minutes of a YouTube video is too much now?

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I am now officially a 25 year old virgin, only kissed on girl in my life back in college. Is it over?

>>34379137
I lost it at 26, as a man it's never over but at the same time, you gotta go out there like a soldier goes out to battle. Have no fear of death

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>>34379137
marcus aurelius was a virgin until 23.
it is never over until you give up. i have been researching this like an autist, looking at how my mates who get laid a lot do things, many many different perspectives on PUA stuff and dating coach stuff and even how to get a trad girl (which is what i want) and i can tell you, it can all be learnt, it is all in how you do things, not what you are. to put it a way that will make sense to us; increase your charisma stat. increase your speech skill. level them up. it can be learned. being honest is an important starting point, many of us have our guard up, and you should not bare everything but you should be aware when you are hiding something or being dishonest. that was a big realisation for me. i never took it much further though because personal realisations like that basically got me a long term girl after only two quick flings my whole life, at guess what? 25.
i am taking it further now in my 30's. i am never giving up, i can't. i have to say i fully tried before i give up.
tl;dr getting girls is all in the talk, the attitude, your conduct, and it can be learned.

Can I expect to pull a college girl if I go to a college bar at my grand old age of 27?

>>34376267
They are just glued to their phones because they are anxious some creep will talk to them and not let up. As long as you aren’t creepy, just keep the conversation going until they open up.

>>34379103
Thanks for the advice, man. Just getting ghosted I know how to deal with, but this is just concerning in a way that's harder to put out of mind. I don't expect to get anything out of it but some closure, don't have much hope of a scenario 4. But I guess worst case is that someone who wanted to fall off the face of the planet anyway might think I'm a bit strange, so might as well get my closure.

>>34379372
Are you good looking? Are you a social person?

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>>34373721
My life is a little too fucked up to date, right now.
I want to change that, despite how time-consuming that will be.

Besides gyming and looksmaxing or whatever.
I know I need a decent career to move forward in dating.

For now I have these as options:
>Teaching English, online and/or abroad
>Try to get back into IT and Software Development
>Gamble by going into the Trades as a newbie at 25 years old

What do you guys think?
Which one seems the most reliable for cash?
Also, what's dating in your 30s gonna be like?

>>34373721
So today I was at the gym and a new girl there started miring me while i was benching, then i went to the tricep extension machine and did some sets, then i went literally 10 feet away and that girl came all over there asking me if i'm finished with my sets on tricep extension while i was literally standing in the rack to OHP. Is this shit common or was she into me?

>>34379599
>Also, what's dating in your 30s gonna be like?
must more dependent on charisma/social skills. but they can be learnt.

>>34379829
I really dont get the point of them randomly showing up at your fucking house, getting your number, and them just never texting or calling. I’d be fine if it was some stranger I’d cold approached or met by chance but i am owed a chance if you’re going to show up to my fucking house out of nowhere.

>>34379076
Well, it's almost as if girls are deliberately not honest about what they want. There are even laws in place that make it seem like they want guys to be kind. So women are always actively gaslighting nice guys into compliance, and using all resources available to do so. You can't blame girls when you think about why, but without much experience, it's next to impossible to conclude that they're full of shit and what they want is the opposite of what they say. Of course, some guys with certain personalities are hardwired to ignore it right away, but unfortunately men like me have to try a bit harder to ignore their gaslighting.

>>34379945
Also, one thing I should note, is that naturally, when one is young (pre-teen, teen), one is more likely to be a jerk/asshole. I got into fights when I was a kid, heck, I even bullied other kids myself. When we get older, we tend to grow out of it, because we mature. So it's hard to fathom that the other sex could've only possibly been attracted to us due to us having that level of maturity. Now that I think about it, that explains why teachers are having sex with teenagers. It's not that teenagers are more bold, but rather, they are less mature, so the actions they make are seen as more "masculine" in a woman's eyes. It's ridiculous. There is some weight to the sentiment that women simply are always children throughout their entire lives.

>>34379634
100%, girls flirt by blocking your path (as stupid as that sounds)
>>34379585
Yes but my brain literally short circuits after getting past the small talk stage

How do I pick up girls and hold a conversation? Friend says be direct and compliment them, then lie and waffle about whatever until you get a hook up. I just have trouble holding a conversation with women since it feels like I'm throwing things that stick on a wall.

I need some rule of thumb I can stick to when practicing talking with girls.

>>34380304
>women since it feels like I'm throwing things that stick on a wall
make the topics about her and shelll do most of the talking
i.e. her life, her personality, her favorite x,
then the formula is as follows:
> she says something about herself
> you dig a little deeper
>she says some dumb shit
> you call her out (tease)

this is the formula that will get her laughing
your job is basically to dig the stupid shit she likes out and you calling her out

>she'll have no problem finding other guys to date
>meanwhile im left with the baggage of being the one who cared too much and struggling to find someone interested again
How do i get better at seeing this trap before it happens

>>34380763
Don’t wait for someone interested, just go for the first girl you see that you want to breed

>>34380320
>stupid shit she likes
Does overconsumption count or is that revealing your power level?

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>Most women are nice to me, smiley, giggly and even casually flirty in real life
>Got very attractive women on my resume and God knows they all made it happen
>Can't get a single match across multiple dating apps for weeks
My profile is low effort and sucks but that shit is still retarded. I'm not picky so total mids are swiping left even if I'd make them foam at the mouth in reality. I just don't have the ego or personality to be a poser.
Going to delete everything and commit to engage women or even cold-approach, especially the ones receptive to my small talks. It may be crushing at first to get rejected a lot but the resilience should build up eventually and I can take it gracefully by being polite to mitigate. I've had it too easy until now and it's time to step the fuck up.
Sorry for my abhorrent post. Had to vent a bit.

Have I been giving women the ick by doing all my dating app likes before 9am?

Also, I don't understand how I can receive literal hundreds of likes in Taiwan within 1 month yet 4 likes from fatties within 4 months in Canada.

Its awful I have yet to gain any attention from my own race (from a white woman I can genuinely respect (not fat or tattooed))

>>34381476
But i wanted her, and had her for a while but then she said she didnt care about me. I dont get thd advice

>"My little secret is..."
>18cm (7 inches)
How fried is that to put in a dating app bio kek? I mean if it'd work...

>>34381803
No one likes Asian men

>>34381843
women are only capable of being any of thing and doing any of this because weak men allow it to proliferate.

Absent or weak father's let their wives, daughters, and sons go crazy.

Weak husband's submit willingly to hysterical women to avoid confrontation

Weak husband's let themselves because weaker after they coom even once. Then spiral into submission

You don't have to be a tyrannt to control women. Just be a good leader. Most men cannot achieve this, let alone ignore a woman who obviously needs to be treated like a ghost (indifferently) so that her ego collapses

Fuck this idea of "ahh women can't be controlled, I'm gonna go wear a chastity cage!"

>>34381497
Have a similar problem with women, but it regards ghosting. I realize I may not pick the best approaches with women I know (or in my case, knew) IRL. But usually, what happens is that when I first meet them they're all smiles and cheery, excited, they even make moves on me, and I respond back with similar levels of excitement and attempt to entertain them with some small talk. After a while, the conversation moves to text or messages on social platforms like Discord. Sometimes, the girls comes and initiates, shows very high interest during this honeymoon phase that I just met her, even if I never texted her before after getting her contact info. Then, I start having some convos here and then. And it may look very good from my end, then the time comes to ask her out. I do so, and there's always some kinds of hesitation, ghosting, they immediately stop responding instantly, some excuse, etc... all those sorts of things. I've lost every girl I knew IRL to a text where I tried to escalate to a date or making things flirtatious, and these are women that show strong initial interest, and I have no idea what the heck I am doing wrong. Upon further digging on these women though, which all contacted me first, I figure out they all had a boyfriend. Maybe my issue is that I let women reach out to me first, and I should do the opposite, that way I don't talk to women who have relationships and only want attention from me. I have good looks, and women are often insecure around me, so maybe that explains my experiences.

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>>34376992
>date tomorrow
>determined to go through with it for XP
>still hoping she cancels

If nothing else, this could be a practice date for dealing with more appealing women. My interest in her is pretty low at this point.

I've gotten several more likes on Hinge and CMB. Must be a weekend thing. I'm retarded when it comes to romance stuff, but I've always been good at regular communication with people. Wasn't sure if I looked attractive or eye-catching enough for dating apps, however, a lot of my photos are getting likes. So I think I am at least decently attractive.

I've since reevaluated my view of my own attraction and have started going after what I thought were "baddies". I take note of the "standouts"--which require a rose to like them--and then wait till they aren't standouts the next day, sending them a regular like instead. I've tried this ex-standout strategy on 4 so far, and I've matched with 3. Oddly enough, I've also spam liked a bunch of other chicks, but this has a much lower success rate than the ex-standout strategy. I suppose they really are checking the standouts for compatibility as well. This means the standouts themselves aren't special, but Hinge is promoting them to me because they match my filters more; making me more inclined to pay for a rose to match with them.

I've noticed the rate of fat chicks is also lower among the standouts. I haven't seen any egregiously-fat ones so far in the standouts. Even though I can't filter by fatness, there must be a hidden field or some other algorithm at play to keep them out of the standouts. Might also help that I remove all fat women from "Discover" instead of simply clicking "X" on them. That way they don't get recycled.

There is this cashier at this fast food place and we always smiling and blushing at each other big time but I’m a sperg and barely said a few sentences to her. do I ask for her number right away after barely saying a few sentences or do I stop being a sperg and make conversation for a few weeks first?

These generals need to ban dating app talks. You’ll have way better results talking to girls in person always, don’t get why any of you want to go the online route. Go outside and start creepmaxxing it will get you somewhere.

>>34383637
true true
but I have actually gone out to approach girls and even as someone who understands it
i can go hours where I approach like 5 girls and get ignored 4 times, one stops to talk and it's awkward and get a pity instagram that goes nowhere.
In my experience it's basically same rate as swiping. around 1% I approach will lead to a date.

At a rate of 5 an hour...around 20 hours of approaching before securing a date with a decently attractive girl. And it's physically and mentally exhausting

I think, in reality, if I want a date, the easiest is from an app
But if I want relationship...I honestly believe it's a low probability thing in today's market (for my market value)

>>34383637
Not getting results on dating apps is a skill issue

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>>34383031
That one rings a bell very recently for me too. There is a girl at my work that has without a doubt a massive crush on me but denied my advance. After trying to know what was going she admitted to have a boyfriend but it's "complicated" (she took extra care to never mention him for months).
I've already gotten a girlfriend who was unavailable that I knew of. The key is patience. If you want her keep at it and stop being flirty but rather a good friend she feels comfortable with. Do not let her know you're seeing someone if you do (she did the same after-all). That's not going to change her opinion of you I reckon. On the contrary even, she'll think you're sincere and don't just want sex (even if you do). At one point, if she really is interested, after asking "how are you?" she will tell you "not so good, I left my boyfriend" and it's time to go. Stay respectful and and don't do it right away however. I'm going to do just that with the girl at my work.
That's not a bad sign if you think about it by the way, we're both aiming for girls who would not easily cheat or leave someone on a whim.
>I have good looks, and women are often insecure around me, so maybe that explains my experiences.
Relatable. I look good but rather intimidating and women have trouble approaching me even if I'm rather easy-going.

>>34384291
>Do not let her know you're seeing someone if you do (she did the same after-all).
Actually just remembered the girl I have in mind did know I had a girlfriend at some point when we were close. Told her I did not really have feelings for that girl and she advised me to break up, which I did. We got together not long after. I guess it's not that bad as long as she feels she is the better option.

Would I be off base for expressing my unease, I stress not dictating behavior, but simply sharing an emotion and why, with her going out to bars on their own? Specifically, and I explicitly communicated this, my main concern is safety, not lack of trust. I rest easy so long as someone who is at least friendly with her is keeping an eye out for her. It seems like a reasonable thing to be wary of to me, but I'm uncertain if it was wrong of me to feel that way, because it wasn't received well.

>>34376854
NTA but I actually am in Japan
What city are you in, and where do you usually go out to meet people?

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>in movie theatre
>just you and a qt and few randos
How does one approach? By my logic approaching before the movie begins is odd and rejection would ruin the movie. Can't approach during the film because if you disturb film watching experience, you deserve to be executed. So you have to approach after the film ends but the social protocol dictates you must leave as fast as possible so that doesn't work.

>>34384624
>So you have to approach after the film ends but the social protocol dictates you must leave as fast as possible so that doesn't work.
Why can't you talk to her about the movie while walking on the way out?

>>34373836
Just be yourself and approach bro :) It definitely won't come across as forced and desperate bro :)

>>34379137
>Is it over?
No. You can lose your virginity in our 30's 40's or beyond. It's only over if you say so. Try saying something else instead bro :)

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>khhv
>overweight
>balding
>eczema
>poorfag
Is moneymaxxing my only hope?

>>34384709
>overweight
That's one thing you can try to fix

>>34384638
Doesn't work out all that well imo, people need about 10 mins or so to process what they saw and actually start talking about it

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what's the difference between tinder, hinge, and bumble?

>>34385751
Why that specifically?

>>34386102
It has to do with making lifestyle changes that will decrease excess fat and improve your physique.
I myself know it is a process but a good place to start.

>>34384709
Also, moneymaxing is pretty much a requirement for survival in this world and in dating.
Money solves most problems.

>be me
>22m, mixed, 5'8"
>inb4 well duh
>focused on school, got into an ivy league, have six-figure STEM job (chemical engineering) lined up
>explored a lot throughout high school and college, developed a variety of hobbies I've gotten pretty far with
>creative outlets, outdoorsy stuff, volunteer to help veterans, all stuff I'm proud of and that i know has helped me grow as a person
>rich social life w regular weekend outings
>tons of le female friends
>cut out all social media during covid, haven't made a post in almost six years
>dated a couple of girls for short amounts of time, mostly breaking up over careers/logistics
>not a virgin, btw!
>learned to groom myself well, invested a lot of time and money into a high-quality wardrobe
>decent face, only ever been complimented on my looks
>got into gym during covid, pretty much always get compliments when I take my shirt off
>pretty much every relationship or hookup has involved the woman approaching me and almost embarrassing herself with conspicuousness
>thoughbeit this hasn't happened for some months now...
with all of this stuff, I do feel pretty fulfilled in life. as such, I don't feel much of an impetus to go hunting for a mate, but at the same time I do feel a little lonely sometimes.
I don't really have any "game" or seductive ability. all the girls I dated I found through my social circles. I never had much of a father figure or anyone really invested in me who'd show me the ropes like that.
when I think about whether I'd be happy if I go another five years without some kind of companionship, I can't say for certain. I just feel like I'm really lost somehow and want to know what I want. I don't want to look back and regret doing nothing, but I also don't /want/ anyone.

>>34386173
I guess I'm really just venting here, but what do I do if I don't want to miss out on this part of life? how do I know if I'm ready to introduce a woman into my life? is going through date after date worth it? will I feel better for it?
with everything else I do the answer has always been clear, but idk this feels like some faggot shit I should have gotten over years ago.

>>34374209
different people want different things. you can't ask 60 different women what women want and get "a straight answer" because they want 60 different things dumbfuck

>>34386183
you don't NEED a partner if you are happy without one. don't fall into the trap of settling for someone because you feel like you have to. if you find the right person, you will know. it's better to be alone and happy than dating someone that ends up being a life ruining psycho

>>34386213
Nta but how to be happy with myself? Im constantly desperate for female attention and Im close to him in terms of his lifestyle and setup aside from social circle and dating experience.

>>34386234
>Nta but how to be happy with myself?
nta but nonny if we knew the answer to this question there would be no /htgwg/

>>34386264
;_;

You all, the worst thing you can do as a guy is feed into feeling lonely and not take responsibility for being selective okay? When you are selective you got to be willing to accept it'll piss off people, and it will, but if someone would truly make you feel miserable, sick, and pass out you need to not fulfill it. If people can't accept that, that is their issue. True 99% of the Earth is water, but most of it is undrinkable.

Just like how even though milk can cure thrist too it isn't a solution to thrist the same with who you prefer when dating. It'll piss off the femimists, but for what is a short term pissed off anger is worth it for the long term. Now if your tastes are like I want ultra filtered water and you dislike tap water that is different. Tap water is good to drink
However if it is truly incompatible with you it is okay to not chase it.

To 4chan moderation team: I'm using dying of thrist as a comparison to when you are selective while dating.

Since western civilization is niggerfied, should I just become a wigger? Niggers usually have the hottest white women dripping off of them and all the white guys I see with hot white women are at least a little wiggerish. I'm thinking of just adopting ebonics into my dialect. I dated a european chick and she said I spoke like no other american and she liked it, but I dont think it translates well for american cunts

at what stage do you ask about her bodycount and if she dated outside her race?

A woman who likes you opens up not closes off. It's common sense but it gets overlooked.

>>34387226
go for it

>>34387226
Try humanmaxxing

>>34387556
nigga i iz a human nigga duh fuk u finna get shot lil bitch

>>34385991
Bumble is Tinder but with few extra features. Initially, only women could message first, but since that wasn't a good business model, now women can allow guys to message first by adding something called "an opening move" to their profiles. Other than that, chats older than a week get archived. Less users, but generally of higher quality

>>34374209
Refreshing to get an actual answer to my question, and I'll take it - I agree with you that they're the worst advice givers, they don't understand themselves. I think the only way is to ask them out early and explicitly, channel your inner Indian.
Or Christianity and be a virgin, sure, whatever

>>34374591
>Do this this that bla bla bla
It's nice to write plans and then never follow on them huh?

You actually had me in the first half too.

Should I ask cute girl for Insta even though I have 12 followers and no pictures? She's gonna know I have no social life. Feels pathetic. I'd prefer to ask for number but it's what everyone at work my age does asking for a number will be seen as weird

I met this girl and we hit it off really well but it seems she has a boyfriend. She dropped it suddenly during the convo like "Yeah my boyfriend likes it too" but she has signs of interest in me. How do I move forward with this?

>>34374657
>This isn't related to the OP I just need attention
That's what your gf is for

>>34388263
just stop talking to her. nobody gets past chad kek

>>34388282
Nah but what if her bf is a onions cuck?

>>34387590
How about you be a polite nigga rather than a mean nigga.

Is tryst a honeypot? None of these women are replying to me

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Just followed, got followed back and then DM'd this girl after 1 day with this line. She responded but I got no clue on what to say next. Help me out. I was thinking about saying something like "are you a secret clone of her" or asking her if she's ever watched any of Mila Kunis' movies. Keep in mind she's 22 and I'm 20 and we don't go to the same university, even though our unis are in the same city.

>>34387902
Just act like you don’t have insta

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>>34387226
>Niggers usually have the hottest white women dripping off of them
Statistically they don't. White women literally are the least likely to be in interracial couples of all people. You probably just think that because girls who do are usually sluts who show off and they catch your eye but the sexy demure ones aren't. You're not going to attract the good kind of girls if you go that route.
Also I'm fairly sure if you ask women what's the sexiest apparel the vast majority will say a military uniform or a suit.

>>34388475
>I can't possibly be the reason no one wants to connect with me
My dog is more self-aware than you

>>34388492
>Also I'm fairly sure
Zoomers need it beaten into their skulls that this and its variants are verbal shorthand for "I'm making this up"

>>34387615
>that wasn't a good business model,
it was a great business model and what made it popular, but they changed it for trannies, so now we can't have any dating website where women aren't flooded with simps.

>>34388478
>3 messages in a row
It's over
But also ask her something

>>34388502
>Zoomers
Senile dogs like you shouldn't be allowed to have opinions

>>34388502
I'm saying that because I don't have concrete data to back this up you fucking moron. Just go and ask women what they think is the most appealing to them. I guarantee you they will say military uniforms or suits. Both give them a sense of security.

>>34388497
Do you think I’m talking about dating apps retard?

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>>34383372
>date went really well
>out all day
>she said she had a really good time
>looked much hotter in person
>women passing by telling her she's beautiful
>randos offering to take our picture
>back to her place
>lose wizard status
>spent the night together afterwards
>left in morning

Sex feels great. First kiss and everything, all at once. Holy shit.

Hinge is a winner.

>>34388552
Never tried hinge bc it forces you to have 6 pics which seems retarded but maybe this is the way

>>34374609
curious on how the date went? since you kissed i would say a text daily would be fine. But also feel out how quickly she responds, and if she is also engaged in the conversation (asking questions back)

You got to own up to your choices. Be willing to accept the fact that not every choice you make is gonna be good all the time, okay? Yeah you picked that girl and it pisses her off you didn't pick her friend. But the moment you don't accept the anger she has and yourself despite it not being a good decision, you're fucked. You got to own up that your decisions are not always good, and at the same time be confident in them.

>>34389143
Following your heart will always have consequences. Earlier I said this is the cost of being a freespirit, and well it is the same here.

How come i can get younger (18-20yo) hotter matches on tinder but not bumble? On bumble I only match with women my exact age or slightly older

>>34388898
Hey anon thanks for checking in. Date got moved to tomorrow, but it makes sense (she was very busy today, I suggested it because she's off work tomorrow so I though it would make it easier to get her home).

I've been texting every second day or so which seems to be working out - she's usually pretty engaged (has texted first) but my text/chat game is pretty shit and I can't carry the convo too much when topics start running out and she's worse than me at conversation resuscitation

How do I stop looking at bitches asses?

>>34389349
Bro, you're gonna hide it all in and then when some sexy chick show ups unconsciously stare at her ass. Try to focus on relaxing instead.

>>34383637
You are obviously right, but people use them explicitly to avoid confronting their approach anxiety. So basically most people are pussies that would rather roll the dice behind a screen.

>>34389297
What I did with the girl I'm going on a date with tomorrow is right after I suggested a hike and she said yes, I asked for a call so we can get to know each other and break the ice a bit, then we set the date and time on the call. That was Friday.
Call lasted 4.5 hours and ever since then I haven't felt pressure to text, I offered to call like 3 times since then but it didn't work out, and the date is tomorrow.
I think call is a power move. Good way to sus out a person's interest and see if you like them too.
Girl I'm going to see tomorrow is autistic, I met her on okcupid, I don't have really high expectations, but I'm trying :) and it's nice to have a date than to not have a date. Good luck with yours man, looks like we're going on a first date at the same day haha, mine starts in 9 hours.

Yes, you clocked me correctly, I think texting is fucking gay and I do much better on call, so I go there instead of text asap

>>34389415
I had this mindset, did the whole outside thing, you know what I realized? Yes I'm a bitch, yes I'm afraid of consequences, no it's not gay or cheating to go on dating apps, I need my training wheels to learn what I never learned before, so yeah dude. Autistic girl but still a girl, dating experience is good for me. It is in fact the first thing I need in my life right now.

>>34373721
Absolutely jesterish framing
Why not do what's important and if a woman happens to join you, consider letting her?

Put making the most out of yourself and the world above being a nice guy. Women like guys who are goal driven.

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>start regularly going to college's study center
>always see this cute asian who mostly studies by herself
>weeks go by without saying a word to her
>be me, today
>fuck it im gonna cold approach when she leaves
>hype myself up
>follow her as she leaves
>nervous as hell and chest hurts
>holy fuck she walks fast
>holy fuck there's more people here than i thought
>start getting in my head
>retreat
>feel like shit afterwards
should i try again? i've never cold approached before. i consider myself good looking if that matters

>>34390428
Half-way walk up and wave. If she smiles and waves back you're good, if not and she just looks and then back to the book or closes up, it was doomed from the start.

I am starting to believe that men are powerless when it comes to dating
All advice given to men to gain some control of their dating is just fairy dust and snake oil.
Every person, goes through their life with a set of traits, attributes, genes, etc
And they are multipliers.
So if anything is really below average, your equation gets fucked up.
No amount of compensation in other areas will increase your SMV any further

In my experience and based on what I see
Your probability of success is within a band, the only thing that actually truly works is to increase exposure
I.e. Meet more women

Now there is one problem here:
If your SMV is low, the sheer number of women you must meet, and the amount of rejection you will face will come at a huge mental cost.

Sex, is guaranteed I think for most people
But relationships, satisfaction with love life is basically predetermined and likely in modern life unnatainabale by most men.

>>34390939
The final blackpill is learning how to find peace with being single.

>>34390946
Yea, statistics show this
35% of 40 year old men are not married
I think the next generation of 40 year olds people who are 30 now this may increase to like over 50%
Being single is just the meta

What this means
We just embrace casual relationships and get a dog because the oxytocin is kinda needed

>>34388503
It was popular at the start, since all the guys thought "now SHE must message ME first!". The results were predictable, so they've turned it into Tinder with extra stuff

So I met this girl who is in an LDR with a dude on the other side of the globe. She seems interested in me despite having mentioned her boyfriend. She wants to hang out and asks how my day is every day. How do I seduce her?

>>34389297
hope the date goes well, when it comes to convo sometimes you just gotta let it die. Let it come naturally, if you try to revive it too much its gonna get a bit dry and boring. So only talk when you got something to talk about basically.

>>34390946
I've been saying that for a while? Has the fact that I have name been distracting from that?

>>34391180
I'm not a regular in these threads but i lurk sometimes

>>34391206
The advice I said was usually, was try to be happy being alone first before you date someone.

>>34391219
That's great advice.

I last used tinder in November and got several dates, and over 100 matches. I deleted because I got busy with work/school. Then I downloaded again this weekend and literally got ZERO matches and 1 like. I am using the same pictures. Has this happened to anyone? Ive been using tinder for years and always at least the first day got a bunch of activity. Literally nothing like Im the ugliest piece of shit in the world all of a suden

>>34391730
>Has this happened to anyone?
Yeah, but with bumble. I would get tons of matches, and hit 99+. Same pictures, but the algorithm didn't favor me this time.

>>34390946
Motherfucker I’ve been single 13 years

>>34392499
I've been single for 31 years.

>>34392499
Don't give up hope. Be more high vibe like Zach.

>>34391143
Thanks anon

>>34389418
Hope your date went well!

Mine went pretty good - like 7.5/10. Went to minigolf then a bar, didn't go further because she has work ultra early tomorrow. Was good with some hugging, making out at the bar, but she is ultra nervous/shy and pretty bad at starting/maintaing conversation in person as well - I did my best but still had lots of dead time which id just break with a wink or a kiss lul. Need to read up a bit on conversation. Hopefully as she gets more comfortable she opens up and can relieve my autistic ass a bit.

Ideally I'll sneak in another date this week, but worst case we're pencilled in for next Monday - work schedules should enable a sleepover so let's see how it goes

>>34392635
Indeed.

What I want you all to do when a girl gives you a ton of unnecessary negative backlash is to instead of reacting to it, just peacefully go with the flow with an "okay then bro" attitude.

I've been repeating to myself "be ok with losing people" every other day or so, and while it has helped me gain confidence and not give a singular fuck with girls, it's also started effecting how I view my friendships, I went a little too far

>>34392979
There's nothing wrong with being laid back. Usually it is a bit cartoonish when you're laying back and the other person is looking at you with extreme profanity in your existence. Your hands and feet aren't moving to hurt the person. It gets better when you allow the same person to do the same to yourself.

>>34392979
>I went a little too far
what happened lol

Hmm, I'm in a pretty big group chat, and there's this one girl in particular that always leaves a read tag whenever I say anything, sometimes instantly, otherwise I don't ever see her participate much.

What's breaking my brain is, she's very pretty, model tier, if I'm to perceive this as some kinda ioi how is someone that fucking beautiful attracted to me, while I've spent my whole life getting rejected by 5/10's

>>34393091
Nothing major, just noticing I'm becoming more blunt and tailoring my responses to their emotions way less

>>34393096
it means shes addicted to her phone. Im not sure why you think it means shes attracted to you

>>34393132
Never leaving read tags otherwise, but when I post it appears instantly? I supposed it could be stacked coincidences, true

>>34390975
The meta is having a girlfriend who doesnt live with you. Which I suppose is “legally single” but yeah. Keep your freedom and your testosterone. Keep your relationship fun and exciting.

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Mid 2023 I was seeing this younger Korean girl. She is a great person inside but had some incredibly toxic behaviors, I was also incredibly toxic to her. She wanted to move very fast etc. Our situationship was on and off for about 7 months into 2024. We haven't seen each other since Feb 2024 but messaged a bit until she blocked me on IG.

Randomly in July 2024, she messaged me on IG asking if I had gonorrhea. I asked why. She was currently seeing a Christian guy and before him I was the last guy she slept with. Apparently her guy got gonorrhea and blamed her for acquiring it. I told her it wasn't me and showed her my most recent STD test. I told her he is probably cheating but she didn't believe me. She got tested a few days later and was negative. We messaged for a bit after but then she blocked me.

Noticed she unblocked me around Oct 2024. Sent her a DM and we msg'd for a bit then she blocked me again.

Randomly called me in Feb, sounded happy and we talked for like 30 mins. Checked IG and she'd unblocked me but then blocked me again a few days later.

August 2025 noticed she unblocked me again, DM'd her, told me to stop trying to force her to do things. Blocked me

Today, noticed she unblocked me again, DM'd her saying we should go out for Boba and catch up. Told me to leave her alone.

What is the point of unblocking me if you don't want to talk to me. You have to physically block and unblock someone.

Do I just not reply or try to explain why I'm contacting her?

>>34393470
kek that is quite the saga
I enjoyed reading it
I guess you're early 20s to be doing this shit

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>>34388796
I had to put a bunch of work into my profile, but it was worth it in the end. Hinge made it easier by saying what things would get me more likes. Besides being able to talk to people with ease, I'd never had friends, lovers, sex, kisses, hand holding, or any remote semblance of a social life. Not even family socializes with me. However, in the 10 days since I installed Hinge, I've gotten 17 likes; 10 that I'm leaving in the like queue without matching, 3 matches I'm actively talking to, 3 matches I've stopped talking to, and 1 match I've had sex with. For comparison, I have 5 likes on CMB, but they are all fat or mothers, so no matches. While Hinge also has mothers, none of the likes I've received on Hinge are from outright fat chicks, like with CMB. So, the women seem higher quality on Hinge overall.

If Hinge worked for me, it can probably work for plenty of people.

>>34393632
Nah, early 30s.

I've dated around a lot during the past few years, so it's not like I'm pinning for her. For some reason this particular girl has kept my interest. Every few months I'll see if she unblocked me and if she does I usually message her. Sometimes she messages me.

I think for how unhealthy our situation-ship was and the extreme toxicity we both put ourselves through was actually a bit addicting. Her sending long text messages about how she's done with me and never wants to see me again, to me responding with "I love you" and an hour later she's over my place.

As much as I say I want a normal relationship, every "normal" girl I've been with was incredibly boring. It's like I need them to either be way on the bi-polar crazy side or all the way on the genuine golden retriever side. It's like I need an overwhelming amount of high & lows or very consistent positive, happy vibes.

>>34393658
>If Hinge worked for me, it can probably work for plenty of people.
how do you define success

Any app can give you dates
But there is not an app out there that will give you a satisfying long term relationship

>>34393824
>me responding with "I love you" and an hour later she's over my place.
kek good lad

Also, the latter part you speak of is basically borderline personality disorder. BPD people love drama. Learn to love peace more than unstable feminine emotions, and get excited about something more productive. Imagine being on your death bed and realizing most of your life was low IQ Filipino / 3rd worlder type drama

>>34393824
I spent most of my life in a similar boat. Not that I loved the drama but I just had a strong selection bias to where I feel like a normal girl doesn’t like me and she needs to display some “love bombing” or obsessiveness for me to even feel like she likes me.

But yeah it’s not worth it bro. If a relationship is too boring for you it’s almost always your own failure. You have allowed a girl to supplant your own friends and hobbies and shit you would otherwise be doing. The easiest way to prevent this is never move in together and just remain aware of it. All women you actually want to be with are inherently boring. It’s part of male/female polarity. We are supposed to bring the juice of excitement and interesting shit and they bring more consistency and comfort and girl shit.

Hi, I'm 5''4 (165cm) tall; do you think I should put my actual height on the apps, or not mention it?
I think that you have to mention it on Bumble, should I add a few inches?

Is a woman waiting 6 hours to text back a bad sign? She always responds enthusiastically and will ask questions to keep conversation going but takes 6 hours every time

>>34395595
its certainly not a good sign. but maybe its okay, I for one cannot deal with women who expect me to text them all day

>>34395221
You're fucked either way, tell this truth and you may as well not have an account, lie and you'll see their expression and desire to be around you die in real time

I get 0 likes on any dating app ever over the span of years. What the fuck am i doing wrong? I'm convinced these apps just don't work at all or I've been shadow banned.
Where do you even meet women as a young man? No one seems to have an answer to this.

>>34395824
I’m welcome to other suggestions from the peanut gallery but it’s either approaching in public or joining special interest groups and hoping there are single women there. You can also go back to school or if you’re bold enough ask out a coworker. I’m completely disillusioned with dating apps and I only lasted about 6 months. I guess if I’m going to meet someone to date I’ll have to find them IRL

>>34395157
>If a relationship is too boring for you it’s almost always your own failure.

It's more boring in the sense of that I meet a girl, she's nice but we don't share any similar interests.

For example:
I dated this Chinese girl who was in her late 20s early last year for about 3 months. She was sweet, nice and we'd cook dinner together occasionally. However, her life was focused on her job. She is an assistant manager at a Starbucks. She'd work her 8-10 hour shift, go home and apparently not do much at home. She lived with her parents and shared a room with her younger brother. She was definitely saving up money for sure. It was just hard having conversation with her. I like photography, video games and other things. We just couldn't relate.

Also, we were kind of sexually incompatible as well. Every time we had sex I had to spend like 5 minutes entering her because it "hurt". I'm not huge by any means and she wasn't super tight. Required me to wear a condom every time.

Also, if I didn't respond to her text messages within a certain time frame, I apparently was ignoring her and she'd always assume the negatives instead of the positive.

We reconnected a few weeks ago, went out twice, hooked up twice but I immediately remembered why it wasn't gonna work. I didn't text her for a week, told her about a project I was doing and she told me we shouldn't see each other anymore, which I was fine with.

All the girls I really clicked with all had the same qualities. Genuinely happy, extroverted, spoke their mind and created a positive vibe around them. Those traits easily allowed me to open up. If they can get me to sing in the car with them, they've won. Unfortunately out of 200+ dates in the past 4 years, only 5 of them were like this and they were all non-local, short term situations.

>>34394761
I have absolutely no issue with peace. Peace to me is being with someone I can naturally and effortlessly talk to about things and similar interests. Boring to me equals not being able to have a conversation, they don't have their own hobbies etc. If a girl I was dating was passionate about her vegetable garden and never shut up about it, her genuinely yapping about it to me would make me happy. I feel like a lot of women don't have passions.

My last ex, even after we broke up, still slept with each other etc. I could still hang out with her all day without ever feeling like I wanted to go home. It was like this before we even started dating. It was just the vibe. Even after we broke up, moved on and stopped sleeping with each other, we could still hang all day.

Most women make me want to go home after 2-3 hours.

>>34396083
NTA, but your whole thing about not clicking reminded me of something. Every girl I resonate with past the surface level has been lesbian. And no I don't learn this via rejection, I learn this over time through social media once we've added each other on things and whatnot. Genuinely feels like divine trolling

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>>34394231
Meeting someone that I like and find attractive. I'm sure that I could get dates with the women on CMB too, but I haven't seen a single one out there that was appealing to me. So, I give the credit to Hinge.

>>34373721
>https://dokumen.pub/why-women-deserve-less-firstnbsped-1467978302-r-1917433.html
Given the stuff in the OP, i'm somewhat skeptical of the quality of the advice in this thread.

>>34373721

I dont know what comes of it But Ill just ask for the sake of it;
Assuming I am fit, groomed and hotlooking Id pass into the main scenario

So I live in a super dense social environment, lots of schools and similar institutions in my area being the one and only filter for love and relationships that I have clearly passed highschool being single

I do travel, go outside, see events, namely weddings or concerts but here is the thing, I am with a huge setback that I only travel in close proximity with family or brother, not quite alone

For entry; lots of girls or women travel in couples, friend groups or with their lovers, noones really out alone or stoic

or has the aura of being single, i cant assure myself they dont have a bf

even then I observe a huge polarization in age from fullblown adults to intermediate adolcsents,

I mean, dating sites are another filter, and the final blackpill that approaching these individuals as a stranger might pass huge creep signals

i am very picky, very

It can be scary I know but honestly with these circumstances I am open to feedback, I mean sure, I can use dating
Apps but even then I am not promised accessible love

>>34373836
Volunteer for a cause you care about, pretending will bite you later on, be chivalrous in every day interactions, for me in Europe it’s not frowned upon. Have a hobby where you can interact with women, go to a gym or specific classes, indoor rock climbing, but do it out interest first, not to interact with women, otherwise don’t even bother, because if you have to even ask, women will smell bullshit on you straight away.

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>>34395824
You need better pics and prompts probably. Only 1 out of 100 swipes will be a match and only 1 out of 20 matches will respond. Of that 1/20th only 1/50 will want to actually go out. It is dogshit lol.
>Where do you even meet women as a young man? No one seems to have an answer to this.
Idk, if you arent friends with any women than you are SOL. Even if you are a chad you have extremely low renown with women/give off rapist vibes if you arent friends with any of them. Its a catch 22 situation really. Honestly I just wait for an opportunity to present itself once every couple of months and fucking pounce on that shit like a leopard. I haven't had any luck so far but at least Ive asked out a few girls IRL in the last year. But I aint bitter about being lonely anymore, I make myself fulfilled with my hobbies and that cannot be taken away from me unlike the happiness brought on by a gf.

>>34397069
Unfortunately, you will never know if they are single, too young etc unless you go up to them and talk.

My first few times approaching were awkward. It will always be awkward unless you grew up as a naturally charismatic, extroverted type of guy. But the good news is that after the first two (yes or no's), you get a boost of confidence. Your mind shifts from, "Damn, I should have just said hi. Now I'll never know." to "She said no but at least I tried". From my experience, the latter feels much, much better.

If you act like it is a video game, it becomes much easier.

>Go up to her, or them
>"Hey, saw you from over there and you look like you have a great vibe"
>She probably say thanks
>"I'm (name), what's yours?"
>Tells you name
>If it's a group, acknowledge them, always
>"What are you up to right now?"
>She tells you what's up
>"Yeah, I just was going for a walk. You seem cool, you like boba, matcha?"
>Says yes or no
>If yes, "Cool, let me grab your number and we can go out for boba sometime"
>gives you number

This is a perfect scenario. Of course, at any point, she could say she has a boyfriend, seem uninterested, standoffish, never reply to your text etc.

If she rejects you, just simply say, "Hey, no worries. Take it as a compliment, have a great day" and mark it down as you killed 1/30 cows you needed to kill for the king of Lumbridge.

If she ends up being under 18, "Sorry, you're too young for me. Have a great day."

Lucky for you, you're in a high dense area. Realistically, no one is going to pay attention to you or remember you.

Bros how do we avoid this shit where bitches go to facebook groups to post pictures of us and "warn" eachother about players and just talk shit about guys?

I already use an alias for sluts but if she were to post a picture of me on there I would be so mad

also remember how they literally got congress involved when men tried to do the same thing. I hate women so fucking much

>>34397817
>also remember how they literally got congress involved when men tried to do the same thing.
you might be leaving out context.

>>34397319
Foids can't smell abusive guys they date for years on end, so not too convincing

>>34397878
coalfax was a website made to report women who have fucked black guys and im pretty sure they had congress involved in getting it shut down and purged from the internet. Meanwhile they routinely use these facebook groups as well as "the tea app" and shit like this to slander men in restricted internet spaces where the man cannot defend themselves

>>34397903
Occupying spaces where woman roam just for interaction alone whereas a man is awkward is destined for failure, abusive or not. Capability to articulate why the man is there increases the chances for at least a conversation.

>>34397903
You're missing the fact that women like to be in those relationships, or become attached and won't change their mind no matter what.

>>34397903
Women can smell autism like a bloodhound but are blind as a bat in determining if a dude is gonna wallop the shit out of them. I thought this was common knowledge.

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Where can I meet real art cultured girls? The bookstores and museums always just have normie YA romance readers who dress artsy but aren't actually cultured. I've only met one in my life and it was my friends girlfriend but she was crazy and accused him of rape

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I live in a shit hole where people almost never meet strangers outside places like bars for example, unlike in the US. How does
>Just go out and touch grass bro
work when that's the case? And no I'm not signing up for fucking rock climbing lessons

>>34396093
Ok, good lad. Sorry to jump to conclusions there, and my late reply.

Sounds like this other ex had way less drama with the on-off, blocked-unblocked, long term post relationship catfights.

Why did you two split?

>>34399174
obviously go to a bar. Its a place where approaching strangers is expected and alcohol is served which makes it a lot easier to talk to strangers. Its like you know the obvious answer but you are asking me the question anyway because you find bars intimidating or something. face your fear. And I do recommend having a couple beers but if you are so scared of becoming an alcoholic then just order a soda or whatever

>Be an average white guy in US, have dated a white girl before but overall struggle to date.
>On campus see some asian group and walk by it.
>Some asian girl and her friend start talking to me, teasing me, when the club splits off into groups they get mad they aren't sorted into my group.
>Some other woman from there finds me online and follows me.

What?

>>34397812

Okay, Cool, but what about the other ppl traveling in groups?

As I mentioned, noone in my country walks out alone So I dont know if I can reach anyone in particular

Let alone if they receive me

>>34399330
>Why did you two split?
It's a bit too long-winded to type out a full, detailed story on why we broke up.

We dated casually for a year, she clearly wanted more. She moved across the country for her masters. We kept in contact. I flew to visit her. Decided to make things official and that I'd eventually move to her. She came back and stayed with me for a few months since her classes were online due to covid. I later stayed with her for a few weeks to make sure I liked the new location. She flew back to help me move. During the last 3 weeks before the move, she did two things that made me re-think my future with her. No cheating or anything, more so principles. If I wasn't weeks out from moving I probably would have ended things. Later we officially moved in with each other at new spot.

After we moved in with each other, over the next year I just stopped treating her like a GF. She felt the shift and eventually broke up with me after some arguments which she started. Ultimately, I was happy she ended things. I didn't want to be the one to break up with her because all of friends and even older sister thought I was just using her to get to *location*. I wasn't but I didn't want the annoying backlash. Despite not wanting a future with her and being emotionally withdrawn for a long time, it still hurt, it just took a few months to hit.

The relationship itself wasn't bad, I just grew resent me due to the two things she did.

>>34399750
Same applies.
As long as you approach them confidently, that is all that matters.

Depending on how big the group is, if it is a mixed group it can be more difficult. Female groups, mixed groups will usually try to cockblock in some way, especially mixed because one or more of the guys probably likes said girl.

Personally, I'd stick to smaller, all female groups. Regardless, all that really matters if that you approach with confidence. If you're attractive enough, you can fumble the approach and still get the number.

For example:
If you're a handsome white guy who approaches Asian women, your chances to acquire socials or numbers is much higher than approaching black women.

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>>34399503
I guess I should mention, for context, that I live in Turkey. You really underestimate how freaking negatively casual encounters are viewed here, people don’t even start conversations with each other in platonic settings like Anglos do and you’re really telling a late 20s autist to just go and do it in here?

>>34399834
>she did two things that made me re-think my future with her. No cheating or anything, more so principles
oh you're that anon

>>34400262
yes. Also I don't believe you. Turk roaches are just people, humor and good cheer are universal. I have done this in korea and mexico and everyone was the same its not just an anglo thing to have a laugh and some beers.

>>34400550
You can check turkish subreddits if you don’t believe me, especially discussions about dating. Sure, everyone likes having a good time but they usually go to bars with their friends and don’t interact much with others. I could probably start a conversation if I really tried, but I don’t want to rely on trial and error and risk being shut down repeatedly, whether I’m flirting with a girl or even just trying to make conversation with a dude.

>>34400550
Not a thing is Eastern Gayrope for example. If you smile at a stranger, you're considered a weirdo/pedo, might get beat up. Everyone hates eachother and want but can't move abroad.

>>34400933
>Everyone hates eachother and want but can't move abroad.

Yeah this is the EXACT same situation in here also kek

God hear my prayer.

I just want to grope a hot chick with big boobs for once in my life without paying for it.

I do not care to be rich or powerful or to decide life and death, I do not care for fancy cars or mansions or anything else.

All I wish for is several years of fond memories that I can look back on when I am old and grey instead of just having regrets.

Please. Amen.

Any thoughts today, Zach?

>>34401079
God please bless this anon. He's a good lad

Do women (19-21) prefer chaste virgin boys or do they prefer fuckboys with a roster? Or is it better to just have some experience but not be a fuckboynigger? (I am 21 and have gotten attention from women quite often, but I'm aiming to get a 10/10 and have like half a year to prepare and improve before that)

>>34401153
I don't think they care either way. What matters is how you resonate them - mannerisms, personality, neuroticism level, looks.

>>34401167
Oh ok, well I'd say judging by how women have treated I am fairly physically atractive (I have seen two underclassmen light up when they found out they were with me for the gradution ball). But I have complete inexperience in terms of anything physical, though I have been on many ?successful dates. This is mostly cuz untill I got hella high one day and took some lyrica I was completely uninterested in 3DPD and only into 2D women. The aformentionted 10/10 has shown interest in me back when we were in high school together and I know now that she'll going to the same uni in september. Do I use the time until we meet to gain experience with other women and focus on glowing up, or do I just go for it and try with her now?

>>34374169
What have you learned?

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Taking her on a date Sunday. I'm gonna seal the deal with a kiss.
Guess I'll take her somewhere nice somewhat away from people and ask her, can I kiss your lips?
Idk

>>34401132
Thanks anon. Hope you have a good day as well.

>>34374169
What “essential part of the puzzle” are you referring to? That he’s tall?

33M pretty decent looking. Looking to get back into dating after a while of just not giving a fuck about it. What app works these days?

>>34401708
Good luck bro. I think you'll do just fine

But I also can't get this thought out of my head:
> saaaaaaaar.......
> saaaar may i kiss yourrr lips saaaaarrrrr??
>SHOW ME BOBS!!! SHOW ME BOBS AND VAGENE!! NOW!!!

DO NOT REDEEEEE(((EEEE)))EEEM!!! DO NOT REDEEEM THE CARD!!!!!!

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>>34373721
I had a date with her Tuesday, another on Wednesday, slept over till noon on Thursday. Seeing her again Wednesday.
She seems to really be into me but is making sure to mention that "even if this doesn't grow into a relationship I want to be friends", so, I don't like uncertainty.
What to do in the meantime until we see each other again? I can't help myself but to wonder and it makes my feelings go all over the place

BTW guys Duolicious is great. I got a zoophile girl interested in me there.

>>34402165
Does that app have read people only? I know Ashley Madison was mostly bots

>>34402148
Just download hinge bud, you'll do fine

>>34402278
Should I pay for it? I'm not that guy who asked but I'm basically the same guy - 29 about to turn 30, really want a gf. Will paying help? I've had hinge for about a month now, not a single match. Had 1 real match on bumble, and 2 real matches on okcupid, that's about it.
Does paying increase chances for these apps to work?

>>34402287
Yeah you need to throw some money at it if you want your profile to be seen at all.

>>34401708
Never ask a girl if you can kiss her. That's fucking so lame.
Just kiss her.

Try to appear as human as you can with people and women. Nobody likes people who try too hard to be perfect.. Appearance wise or socially, not everything else.

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>>34388552
>saw her again on Thursday
>sexed again
>tons of kissing
>might be pretty good at kissing now
>still a long way to go to get good at sex
>coming over to my place for the first time this weekend
>plan is to have as much sex as possible until I think I am good at it

She made it seem like she was all about love and long-term stuff, but she seems to really like sex too.

I like her, and I think I can stay with her long-term. Maybe this is moving too fast? I don't know what a relationship is supposed to be like, so I have nothing to compare this too. I can't help but feel like I'm at risk of getting "tricked" by whoever happened to be the first woman go on a date with me, kiss me, and have sex with me. It's easy to think I got lucky on the first draw. It's also to think I'm being overloaded by all of this new stuff and I'd feel the same about any woman that threw me some affection.

I also don't know if we are "dating" now. We met twice, and the first one was definitely called a "date". Does this mean she is my gf? Should I uninstall Hinge and CMB? I haven't progressed any talks with other girls on either since our date last week.

>>34403133
If you're going on dates, you're dating. Dating doesn't mean you're exclusive/in a relationship, however. Let her bring up exclusivity.

>>34403133
>>34403247
That said, make sure to do everything you can to not get too attached too quickly. Easy come easy go and all that.

>>34402164
You just started seeing each other and you're going on dates every day? Homie you gotta give her some time to miss you.

How are you supposed to respond when a woman says she loves you? Apparently saying it back makes her get the ick and lose interest?

>several years older
>far away, or in small towns
>not the same race
>have kids already
>fat or tattooed
>not a woman

I noticed the only women who are interesting in me and other unappreciated good men have these qualities. It's always a mix of the above.

We WILL conquer a woman who are not these things. And we WILL enjoy looking and them and spend time with them.

I just had sex with my gf for the first time yesterday. Lost my virginity to her. She gave me a few blowjobs before we ate dinner. After dinner, we had sex again and I demanded she give me a blowjob after I fingered her. She likes to play the submissive role and said earlier that I can do what I want with her so I thought this was okay. She acquiesced. We had sex again before we showered, cuddled, and she left. Today, she texted me to say that bj after we ate felt weird and that I should ask for consent instead of demanding and that it wasn't respectful and that I should know better.

Am I a rapist? I apologized a few times but I don't know if that's enough. I also don't know how to make it up to her

>>34403724
you might be dating "one of those women" - a liar that makes shit twisted and complicated

Or she could be fulfilling her submission fantasy. Be confident with you fucking her. Listen to her body language. You asking about this tells me you aren't evil. Know that.

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>>34403247
>>34403253
>That said, make sure to do everything you can to not get too attached too quickly.

This part is pretty hard, desu. I don't think I've gotten too attached yet, but she is planning for us to do things that I'd think only a more attached pair of people would do. She wants me to meet some of her family at an event and to be with her for an upcoming medical procedure next month. I've just been going along at her pace so far; which might be too fast for me.

I can get detached pretty quickly, once I think something won't work or is a bad idea. Not sure what that process will look like though.

If dating isn't isn't the same as having a gf. I suppose I can keep talking to other women then. It felt odd talking to the multiple women and then ignoring the others when the date happened.

Thanks.

Is it good to go to bars alone to talk to women if you dont really have much of a friends who like to go out ?

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>Be in small shop
>Girl with really cool hair is there
>There was a moment where we're both standing practically next to each other in the aisle while shopping
>Tell her "I really like your hair, it's very cool"
>She starts glowing and says thanks
>That's all I really wanted to say so mentally close the door on the interaction
>Caught her looking at me like 4 times in different parts of the store otherwise
Wait, did she want me to hit on her or something, did I miss an opportunity? Fuck.

Aight guys, when you got a feeling a girl's into you, how many times were you right, and how many times were you lookin at shit that wasn't there?

>>34398108
That's a funny name, but way different than what you said initially, disingenuous bitch

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Listen to me word for word, do not let how this dating game is ever make you depressed. It is better to move on and enjoy life than to let some woman who you thought you could live happily ever after with you fall apart randomly out of nowhere. The more humility you have with life the easier it will be. Just don't let this shit bother you. It can humiliate you, but it will never eat you.

>>34404405
What if it feels like I just get friendzoned constantly or that no one's ever interested in me like that at all? It's an ego thing but there's nothing wrong with having your ego stroked every now and then. Genuinely makes me feel like I'm just super undesirable.

>>34404416
You got to just move forward.

>>34404284
After a failed oneitis back in high school I was never the one to catch feels first. It's a huge advantage in dating

>>34404433
It feels crazy because it's even ugly chicks who seem like they're not interested. And it's not like I'm into them but it'd be nice to feel like someone wants me. That's how bad this has gotten.

>>34404439
I need to just do this. I'm so stupid for constantly catching feelings so quickly.

>>34404416
You have to learn how to be your own biggest fan and cheerleader

>>34404439
Takes me awhile to start genuinely being into a girl past lust based things like wanting to fuck, but I feel like we aren't exactly the same. Got any tips?

>>34404451
This is where it's unironically better to be stupider, I literally cannot do this because there's no data to back it, so I just end up feeling like a delusional retard

>>34404456
Pretty much. I've been trying to "fake it till I make it" for years now and it's never really worked. I just end up feeling super disingenuous.

>>34404453
You can control falling in love. How else do you explain female CEOs not falling in love with grocery clerks

>>34404456
Yeah, you unironically have to turn off your brain and stop thinking. Not "stop thinking so much", not thinking at all. Retardmaxxing some call it. The method I managed to use to do it is that since the world is already insane now, I have to become even more crazy to survive in it. It has helped.

I dont understand how its so easy for you guys. I had one girlfriend and Im 30. no casual sex (mostly bc the few opportunities I had turned them down)

>>34404515
You sound like me, only the few opportunities I had for casual sex, I was a loser with no car and lived with my parents so I was never able to get into anyone's bed even though I was close to doing so.

>>34404524
yea Im a brokie still with my parents, I cope if I had my own place things would be different. Im working on it but it will still be a year or two. Do girls even fuck guys in their mid 30s, they just want to settle down for them

>>34404530
We're in the same place more or less, kek. Only I'm trying to finish my degree before I start a proper career. At least I hope.

>>34404515
>100% rejection rate in middle in high school
>Didn't go to college cause family bullshit
>Dating apps don't work, and it's not advised to shit where you eat
I was ugly, had bad hygiene and dressed like shit in middle/high school so it makes sense, but now in my early 30's, even though I've fully got that shit together now it's still hard to shake ideals so well woven into my brain, I feel like if I merely express interest it'll be received negatively

>>34404595
I have this going on too. I've internalized rejection so much that I don't even really try anymore. Legitimately every single woman I had a crush on from middle school through the earlier part of community college rejected me, so I don't even really bother anymore. My brain just automatically tells me that they only want me as a friend, at most. And almost every single time, I'm right too.

>>34404604
Yeah I feel that, how often I'm right doesn't really help either. Feels like something's wrong with me on a fundamental level I'm unable to identify sometimes

I make friends easy, easier than I'd like at times, so it's not a social skill thing. I just don't know

>>34404607
I am literally the exact same way. Kek

Making friends isn't really a problem for me. Keeping them is, because I'm so socially anxious that I'm terrified they'll hate me once they find out I'm a loser. But whatever the reason, I just can't seem to attract women towards me, especially the sorts of women I actually like. Occasionally some will be interested but it's always someone I have no physical attraction to.

>>34404439
That’s cool but that isn’t what >>34404284 was asking. He was asking how often the hunch of that someone is into you is accurate.

Robros, I need to watch YouTube videos to learn how to make out.

Is it even worth installing dating apps/trying to get laid for the first time if I still live at home with my parents like a retard? I’m 22

>>34404633
There's no "hunch" involved, you just gotta take a step back and evaluate the signals. As long as you have any experience with women and you're not living inside your head, it shouldn't be hard
>>34405131
You can still get away with it at 22. Try it, you might get lucky

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How to go from exchanging smiles with prolonged eye contact to having sex?

>>34405959
7 hours together

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Girl canceled our date today because she overselpt and claims she has to wake up early tomorrow for her fathers surgery. She wants to reschedule.
How do I respond without sounding mad, simp, and salty?

>>34406254
>because she overselpt
It's joever, bro. Just move on.

>>34406264
I know. Put fucking alarms. I'm not important to her

>>34406254
You should set up one more date and if she doesn't show up then move on fr

>>34406254
One more chance.

>>34406546
>>34406341
Thanks for the mature response bros

About to turn 32, I have a date with a 24 year old cutie. How bad are the optics of an 8 year gap?

>>34406584
Its not crazy at all. Stop giving a shit about what hypothetical r*dditors would think and enjoy your date

>>34405715
>There is no hunch
>Proceeds to give a roundabout nonanswer on what a hunch is without actually explaining what his are
Lol

>>34406254
>"Oh no worries, that sounds a lot more important, we can try for [reschedule date]"
Is what I'd do, if you get excuses about rescheduling, then yes, it's over.

>>34406584
Women love dating guys 20 years older than them

>>34406629
>>34406783
Cheers bros. I kinda feel bad for women my own age range but just being with her is such a breath of fresh air. Like the energy is light and playful not a damn job interview. Not even a physical thing mostly but an energetic thing

>>34406584
Internet isn't real life, as long as you're both cool with it (and above the age of consent) who cares.
>>34406686
Why bother with guessing when you can just check for basic signals like her looking at you, laughing, keeping close to you, sending messages longer than three words, asking questions, the usual stuff that every dating guide out there lists

>>34406691
Thanks man. I told her I understood, good luck with tomorrow, and well reschedule.

This is an “identity” approach to getting a girl. I recommend it if you have at least tried to approach girls but your confidence wavers and you feel like you are so close yet can’t past the finish line.
Your identity has a great influence on your attraction. Seeing yourself as a loser, too weird, too shy, too damaged from whatever past experiences will change how you act around girls. When she gets attracted you may get uncomfortable because you feel unworthy.
The solution is to step into a new identity. Think what this new version of you is like. “I want to feel comfortable in my own skin and naturally expressive around girls I like”. Start seeing yourself in this way by picturing it and imagining it. See if you can feel what it would be like. The idea is to stop telling yourself the “I suck” “my life sucks” “nobody will accept me” story. The continual focus on this will literally create more experiences that reinforce it, and you will tend to ignore positive feedback and highlight the negative ones.
Don’t fight the negative identity either. If you are focusing on it don’t FIGHT IT or stressing. “Oh my God I’m STUCK forever in this shitty life.” This seriousness keeps you further stuck. You also need to enjoy or be neutral with your life as it is. “My life sucks but once I get everything I want then I can be relieved and happy.” Instead try to enjoy things as they are, without needing anything to change, which paradoxically makes it so much easier to change. Choosing between which cookie you want is a lot less stressful than trying to move towards the cookie while running away from the shit pie. Your actions will be smoother and you wont have to force change.

I think the very fact there's threads like this signals that the way to get women while studied, is not practically applicable.
In that, even if you know what women respond to and like, to alter your behavior or self to be that person, is not a practical thing.

As a result I advise the following:
Your behavior is fixed, don't worry about the little things such as what this guy is pointing out:
>>34407304
tiny tweaks in mindset do not actually have any impact on results, and will actually cause you to further think that small things matter.
They really don't.

Instead the big things matter:
Your market: Where are you located, and how do you compare to that market?
If you are in Miami or LA, you'll have to be a different guy to have a chance than in the Phillipinnes or in Bolivia.

Your volume:
How many girls can you meet per week?
Raise this number and you raise your success.

Raising your value within a market (be it dating apps etc,) seems to be what most people focus on, but I'd say that is a mostly futile thing.
You can improve with extreme dedication perhaps one standard deviation.
So going from a 4 to a 6 is possible with extreme efforts within a market.
But can also be accomplished by simply moving to another city. (much easier)

>>34407848
Finally reality based post, especially behavioral traits being a fixed
Moving from Eastern Europe to South America is like night and day society wise and will completely change your results by that alone.